The Unbelievable Mr Brownstone Omnibus

by Michael Anderle

  “I don’t give that much of a shit, but my accountant keeps telling me to pay more attention to when I can write shit off.”

  Mack stood and stretched. “I better get going pretty soon, or my wife might be chopping me up to make into barbeque.”

  James chuckled. “It’s been nice talking to you, Mack. I needed the distraction.”

  “I meant what I said earlier, Brownstone. A lot of us at the station have your back, and that shit includes AET now, even if Hall still is sore about your little streaming stunt.”

  “Thanks, Mack. I appreciate it. I’ll let you know, depending on what the lawyer says.”

  The cop gave him a final nod and headed for the door. He frowned, stopped, and turned around. “Oh, I almost forgot to ask you. A woman named Heather contacted me about my rental unit. Claims you as a reference. I’m thinking that’s a gutsy move if she’s lying.”

  James shook his head. “She’s not lying. She does some contract work for me at times. She’s got a young kid, and she’s looking to relocate to Los Angeles, and live somewhere she feels safe.”

  “Feels safe?”

  The bounty hunter nodded. “She’s had bad experiences in San Francisco. I figure living in a cop’s place will make her feel a little more relaxed. She’s in a wheelchair, too.”

  Mack grinned. “Luckily I got that ramp installed back when I thought my mother-in-law was going to be stuck in a wheelchair and wanted to live with us. At least now it doesn’t feel like such a waste of money.”

  James chuckled. “Sounds like it’d be perfect for Heather and her son, then.”

  Yeah.” Mack opened the front door. “If she’s good enough for James Brownstone, she’s good enough to rent from me.”

  “Thanks,” James replied. “She might not be able to move in for a month. She has a few things to take care of first.”

  “Fine by me. I’m in no hurry.” The cop waved, stepped outside, and closed the door behind him.

  James looked around the empty house, frowning. With his friend gone, the looming threat of the court hearing returned. There was only one thing left for a man who’d spent hours discussing barbeque to do.

  Fuck it, I’m gonna go get some ribs.

  Okay, calm down, Alison. It doesn’t matter that you’re zero for eight. You’ve got this. Shay’s not gonna get your new memory foam pillow.

  The girl looked back and forth, her back against a wall as she looked for Shay’s familiar soul. She hadn’t caught sight of the woman directly the entire time in the mall, but there were so many people it was hard to be sure. She’d been too confident.

  She probably is getting close, though. If she was launching the tags from two hundred feet away it’d defeat the purpose of what she’s trying to teach me. It’s supposed to be about immediate situational awareness that doesn’t rely on any magic other than my energy sight.

  Alison tried to consider possible clues. She’d been bumped into four times. One or two times was one thing, but not four, especially when she was going out of her way to avoid people. After the first two times, she’d checked the latest bag and her clothes for a tag and found nothing, so it wasn’t like the people themselves were planting the tags. If they weren’t accidents, then the question remained of why they were bumping into her.

  Distraction seemed the obvious explanation.

  The teen nodded and tried to channel her inner Shay. Alison couldn’t see the tags, but she could see people. It apparently wasn’t important to take her attention away from the item, but rather the person planting the tags, and somehow Shay was accomplishing that a different way the four bump-free times.

  Shay’s distracting me from her. She must be watching me, then gets close when she has the person bump into me so I don’t notice her. If she’s going that far, she must be darn close when it happens.

  Alison nibbled on her lip as she made her way toward the final store, staying close to the wall so she had less area to examine. She slowed her pace and took a moment to check her pillow, and then the rest of her body. Still no tags.

  It was just a few more yards to the store. A man bumped into her, but Alison ignored him, instead looking the opposite way. Familiar soul colors emerged from the crowd, and the teen offered Shay a wave.

  Got you.

  Shay turned and walked the opposite way. Alison took the chance to head into the candle shop to buy the aromatherapy candle set she wanted.

  Alison had caught a glimpse of Shay’s energy a few times, but the woman kept disappearing back into the crowd. Nobody else had bumped into her during the minutes it’d taken her to walk from the candle shop toward the front of the mall, which meant Shay was going to use her other strategy.

  I’m onto you now. I’m going to win this last round.

  Following the flow of people to the entrance was easy, but unlike with many of the shops, a faint residue of magic was embedded in the front doors of the mall. Whether it was something the owners of the building had done or the result of something unrelated Alison didn’t know, but that still made it far easier to judge the exact distance to the exit.

  The teen slowed her pace and moved against a wall to do a tag check on her body and candles. Nothing.

  Alison swallowed, set her bags down, and wiped her sweaty palms. She did another quick inspection of the candle bag and her clothes for a tag.

  Given her position along the wall with only a few yards to the exit and Shay nowhere in sight, she was home free. She couldn’t imagine a way the woman could plant the tag. Sure, the tomb raider had been watching Alison, but now she couldn’t get close enough to plant a tag, and another distraction stunt with someone bumping into her was bound to fail. Shay would just have to watch Alison stroll out of the building.

  The girl frowned. No, that’d be too easy. If Shay had been watching her the entire time, then that meant she also could easily figure out what direction she was going.

  She gasped. That was the key.

  She said they weren’t magical, but she didn’t say they weren’t gadgets. Maybe they bounce onto me when I get close. If they’re already on the ground, no one might notice them.

  Alison took a deep breath and slowly let it out. No wonder Shay had been getting her. The teen had been too predictable in her walking paths.

  She looked to her side, watching the flow of energy and people and waiting for her chance. A few seconds ticked by, and Alison sprinted for the exit on the opposite side, darting between a few people while she headed for the doors.

  A few people yelled at her, but the girl reached the door without a collision. She threw it open and stepped outside.

  Her heart pounding, Alison waited for Shay to call.

  Instead, the woman stepped out of the door across the way and headed toward the teen. Alison tilted her head, not sure for once if the soul she was seeing was Shay’s, but when the woman drew closer, she no longer had any doubts.

  “Two for ten,” Shay commented. “Not great, but it wasn’t zero, so it’s a good start.”

  Alison smiled. “Thanks, Aunt Shay.”

  “Let’s do a little debrief before we head to the car. First of all, did you have some sort of strategy? It seems like you figured out things toward the end.”

  “Not really a strategy.” Alison shrugged. “The only thing is that I grabbed stuff in the order I wanted it, so I figured I’d get the things I wanted most toward the end.”

  “Wait, so what you wanted most were a new pillow and some candles?”

  The girl nodded.

  Shay sighed. “I don’t know if that’s great or sad. Okay, just to make sure you weren’t lucking out, tell me a little about your mindset on the last couple of items.”

  Alison nodded. “Okay, well, I realized you were sending distractions at times, so I wanted to reduce the amount of area I had to search. That’s why I kept sticking to the wall.”

  “Good thinking, though can you think of a tradeoff?”

  Alison furrowed her brow. “Even though there were few
er places to watch me from, there were fewer places I could run.”

  “Exactly. No perfect strategies. And the last bit?”

  The teen glanced back at the light magical glow of the doors. “I kept assuming before that you were sneaking up on me, but at the last minute I realized you were setting traps.”

  Shay nodded. “Good thinking, Alison. Yeah, people after you won’t always use the same strategy. From what we can figure out, the Drow first tried deception on James, and then they used brute force. Adapt and overcome.” She walked over to pull Alison into a tight hug. “There just might be some hope for you yet.”

  9

  Several days later, Alison stood outside the tactical room as James helped zip her jumpsuit.

  “You sure about this, Dad?”

  “Yeah. You’ve been doing really well lately,” James offered. “And the guys all like you and respect that you’re trying hard. This is just a continuation of your training. Remember, they aren’t real guns.”

  Alison smiled and stepped back. “I can’t say I’m crazy about doing all that exercise, but at least I’m not puking at the end anymore.” She frowned. “I feel like I’m lying to everybody, though. They don’t know that I can’t see. It feels kind of rude given, how nice they’re treating me.”

  James shrugged. “It’s a lesson for them as well. They need to learn to pick up on hidden body language. If they ask, you can tell them the truth. Until then, it’s on them to figure it out.” He handed her a rifle simulator. “A bounty hunter should never ignore obvious clues.”

  Alison could see the slight outline of the weapon, and since she doubted her dad was using fake magic rifles, she could only assume he’d been messing around with the magical powder again.

  “Remember, it’s not real, but it’s gonna hurt. That pain is real enough,” James explained. “But it’ll hurt less if you go down. Also, remember you’re on the blue team.”

  She shrugged. “I know, but Dad, that’s pretty useless for me. Not like I can see the color of their uniforms.”

  The bounty hunter leaned in and handed her a small earbud. “Yeah, I know, need to make it fair. If you aim at someone and press the auxiliary button on the simulator, it’ll beep if they are on the enemy team. It’s not automatic, though, so you can’t use it like some sort of general enemy team sensor. Or you can always just fire. There’s no friendly fire setting for this set of training matches. That’ll make it easier for all of you.”

  The teen nodded. “If I’m close enough I can recognize their energy, and I know who is on the other team. Won’t they figure out I’m blind pretty quickly with me having to stumble through all the ramps and obstacles and blocks?”

  James shook his head. “Shay and I coated the entire place with more of the magical powder I bought from Zoe. It doesn’t do anything, but it is magical, so you’ll be able to make out the entire place, just like with the obstacle course.”

  “How much did that cost, Dad? It seems like half this place is coated in that powder. Even if it’s useless, it’s still magic.”

  “Don’t worry about it. It’s not like I have anything better to do with my money.” James shrugged. “Look, I get that in the real world you won’t necessarily have that advantage, but you need to learn weapons handling in movement and cover situations to even have a chance.” He frowned. “Maybe I could buy a ton of this powder, and you could carry some around and coat places if you get in trouble.”

  Alison laughed. “I’m not carrying around a bunch of powder.”

  “Just saying.” James nodded toward the door to the tactical room. “This is a good experience. It gets you the feel of a fight without the danger, but the pain is enough to motivate you. Again, if you get shot, go down unless you really want it to hurt.”

  “You could always turn the shock in my suit off.” Alison shrugged.

  He snorted. “You have to be a little bit afraid. Now get in there.”

  Alison rolled her eyes and jogged into the tactical room. Her dad was right. The light coating of magical dust brought the complicated multi-level maze of ramps, hallways, blocks, and walls to life before her eyes.

  Trey and Shorty jogged her way.

  “You ready for this, Alison?” Trey asked.

  She nodded. “Just need to murder all my friends, right?”

  Trey laughed. “Yeah, that’s the spirit. Cap the bastards. Come on, let’s go teach a few of the guys a lesson.”

  He led Alison up a ramp to the second level.

  She took several deep breaths as she looked around, the glow of the souls of every man in the room obvious to her. In the confines of the tactical room maze, it was easy to spot even the men who were hiding.

  Alison grinned. The game was all about surprise, and she had a major advantage. It almost felt like cheating.

  Dad said they should be more aware of their environment, just like me.

  Trey raised his rifle simulator. “Just keep moving if they close in, and pay attention to when your suit buzzes. This ain’t paintball. You hear the shots, but the only way you’ll know if they are landing close to you is that buzzing.”

  The lights flashed a few times to signal the start of the match.

  Half the other team jumped out of their cover and opened fire. Alison ducked, her suit buzzing. She waited for it to subside and then followed the energy of one of the enemies running up the ramp—Lachlan, judging by his soul. She stepped behind a wall and waited for him.

  Alison squeezed the trigger without hesitation, and Lachlan fell to the ground with a hiss.

  “Damn, girl. It’s like you can see through walls.”

  Almost.

  Alison’s face broke out in a grin. Winning was fun, especially against all the trained bounty hunters. More cries of pain and grunts echoed in the small room. She glanced around. Both her team members and members of the other team were dropping.

  Alison ran the opposite way and rushed down a ramp. Her suit buzzed, and she spun and returned fire. The enemy crouched behind a large block, his energy obvious on the edges.

  The girl waited, her gun raised, and nailed him in the head when he stood. He yelped and collapsed.

  Alison winced. “That looked like it hurt.” She wedged herself into a narrow opening underneath one of the ramps and waited, her rifle up.

  Two enemies ran right by, and she downed them both. She wiggled out of the opening, laughing. She didn’t even need the special earbud the way things were going.

  “All that big training and my scrawny little butt is taking you—” Alison yelped as a jolt struck her leg from the side. She burst out laughing and fell to the ground. “It tickles.”

  Two matches later, Trey grabbed Alison and pulled her aside.

  “Staff Sergeant said they’re gonna turn the smoke on this time, so visibility’s gonna be bad,” Trey commented.

  Alison shrugged. “Just have to find them and shoot them.”

  Trey looked back and forth and leaned in to whisper. “Look, I’ve been watching you. You’re good. Better than almost anybody here, and I see you picking off people I didn’t even know were there.”

  She nibbled her lip. “Beginner’s luck?”

  The bounty hunter smirked. “Ain’t no such thing, little girl. I know your dad’s been telling you not to use magic, but I figure you slipped a little in this time or something.” He held up a hand to cut her off from speaking. “Don’t need to know the details. This is a game, not the street. But you go high and just let me know where the other guys are. We take this when it’s already two-one, we win.”

  Alison grinned. “I’ll admit I have a few tricks up my sleeve.”

  Trey raised his rifle simulator. “Then it’s time to show them that James isn’t the only Brownstone they should be afraid of.”

  Alison was happy to get out of the suit. The sweet taste of victory lingered, but so did the BO that came from being trapped in the tactical jumpsuit for three full grueling matches. She finished pulling it off and dropped it into
a box near the exit. Her shorts and T-shirt were soaked with sweat.

  Several shouts of “Good job, Alison” followed as the men finished removing their jumpsuits and wandered toward the hallway leading to the showers.

  Trey waited near the door, his arms crossed, until the rest of the men had departed. James turned the corner and headed toward the pair.

  Alison waved. “Hi, Dad.”

  James smiled. “Hey, kid.”

  Trey pushed off the wall. “Hey, Alison, you know what the most important part of being a bounty hunter is?”

  She shrugged. “Kicking butt?”

  “Nah, that’s easy. It’s noticing shi…stuff. It’s how we track guys down, and I noticed some stuff in those matches.”

  “I thought we already talked about this.”

  James frowned and crossed his arms.

  Trey shook his head. “Nah, the thing is, I was thinking this was all just magic, but then I’ve been noticing how you move since you’ve come here. How you look at people—or don’t look at people.”

  “And?” Alison held her breath.

  “You blind, aren’t you? But I know you can tell when people are coming at you. I figure you’re blind, but you make it up with magic somehow. Maybe magic sonar or something like that.” Trey grinned.

  Alison blinked and looked at James. He gave her a nod.

  “I see magical energy and the energy of life, particularly souls. I can also tell when people are lying because of it.”

  Trey shook his head. “Damn. Now that would be handy. All this makes a lot more sense.” He glanced at James. “Why didn’t you tell us, big man?”

  The bounty hunter shrugged. “She doesn’t like people to know, so it’s not my business to tell people.”

  “Fine, then I won’t tell the boys. They can figure it out themselves.” Trey gave them a little mocking salute and walked away. “Until next time. I fear the day she ain’t on my team.”

  James and Alison chuckled. The bounty hunter’s phone buzzed, and he looked at the incoming message.