Wrong Kind of Love

by Amanda Heath

  I do realize I’m only seventeen years old but these are things I have to look for. Daniel and Mom will always be looking for Aiden and I. I know for a fact that Daniel sees us as property and he won’t stop until he has us back. I need to bury myself so far inside Grace that I won’t ever be found. I need to secure a future that the things in my past won’t rip me away from.

  What I’m trying to say is Jaden is the sticking around type and Caden isn’t. It’s sad to say that, but I can’t be left alone now. I have to have someone that will be there for me and won’t run from every problem.

  Jaden brings me out of my thoughts when his soft lips meet mine. The kiss is gentle at first, but before long he uses his tongue to open my lips. Then he is devouring me. Though it seems off somehow. Like he doesn’t really feel anything for me but lust. I guess I shouldn’t really care since I harbor fantasies about his twin brother.

  My hand snakes under his t-shirt and gets a nice feel of his abs. He groans against my lips and I smile. They may be completely different but these Harper twins are all sex. The way they move, the way they touch, hell even the way they talk.

  Before long my shirt is off and thrown on the floor and then my bra. Jaden and I haven’t had sex yet and we definitely haven’t made it this far either. I’m frustrated because of all the making out we do and I just want him to take me. Yes that makes me a slut but hell I’m horny.

  “We have to stop.” He pants pulling away from me.

  Fuck that. I push him over onto his back and climb on top of him. His erection strains against his jeans trying to get to me. “Why?” I ask leaning over him to kiss his lips.

  He gently pushes at my shoulders forcing me away. “Because we are at my parents’ house. I have yet to have sex here and I’m not starting now.”

  I thought he wanted to have sex but he must not want it bad enough. The sting of rejection makes me climb off of him and lower myself down to the floor. I quickly put on my clothes and stand to leave. I turn around when I think I have my face composed enough and smile. “Okay. I’ll see you in the morning then.”

  I feel tears start to burn my eyes but I refuse to let them out in front of him. “Grace I’m sorry.” He says getting up off his bed to stand in front of me. The movie plays softly in the background and all I want to do is punch the freaking TV. “It’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you, I just have things I won’t do. I respect my parents too much to have sex in their house.” He grabs my shoulders and places a chaste kiss on my forehead.

  I smile up at him and return the kiss to his cheek. “I understand. No worries.” I turn to leave when something catches my attention. There is picture of a girl about my age sitting on his dresser. It’s not in a frame but just lying there. The girl is beautiful though and when I take her in I get a sick feeling in my stomach. She is blonde haired and blue eyed. And she is in a cheerleading outfit. We look so much alike it’s scary.

  Without even thinking I walk over to his dresser and pick up the picture. Grace wouldn’t do something like this. She would pretend she didn’t see it and go on about her life. Me, not so much. “Who is this?” I question with a little bit of venom in my voice.

  Jaden looks taken back that I picked up the picture and even more surprised I questioned it. “No one.” He says quietly. All the color has drained out of his face and I start to feel bad.

  I step closer to him placing the picture back where I found it. “You don’t look like she is no one. You can tell me Jaden. I promise I won’t get mad.” With all the shit I’m hiding I can’t possibly get pissed about anything.

  He rubs a hand down his face and sits back down on the bed. His elbows come down on his knees and his lays his head down on his upraised hands. “Her name is Ava. She went to high school with us. I’m a pretty private person so I didn’t tell anyone we were dating. Her parents weren’t too happy about her having a boyfriend, so we pretty much kept it from everyone.” He pauses and the most heart wrenching noise comes from his mouth. A sob. “She was the one, and I hate that I have to say this to you. I just don’t want to lie about it anymore. I want to get it out.”

  I sit down next to him and throw my arm over his shoulder. I pull his head down to my chest and comfort him the way I think a mom would. “You can tell me anything Jaden. I won’t judge you.” I run my fingers through his hair and blink several times trying to get the tears to clear out of my eyes.

  “I was with her for two years. My love for her was my life. She was my life. I hated keeping it a secret but she didn’t want to upset her parents and I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.” His sobs get harder and I brace for what comes next. I just know my heart is going to be ripped out of my chest for him. “She was hit one night by a drunk driver. I was on the phone with her and I could hear her fucking screaming. And I didn’t know what to do. I called her parents and told them what happened. I knew where she was because she said something about a landmark. I ran out of the house and drove until I found her, but the ambulance made it before me. They were cutting her out of the car and she looked horrible. I fucking thought she was dead.”

  I breathe a little at hearing that. She’s not dead. “She’s not dead?” I ask quietly and I’m not sure he heard me.

  His head shakes a little and my shirt feels damp where his tears have been landing. “She didn’t die. She had a skull fracture and swelling of the brain. They weren’t sure she was going to make it. She stayed in a coma for three weeks and every single one of those days was horrible.

  “I had explained to her parents what she was to me. They knew my family and me so they weren’t upset. Her dad even told me he thought I was good enough for his daughter. That was a bright spot in all of this. I thought when she woke up we could be together in the open but those thoughts came crashing down.” He sits up and starts rubbing at his eyes. I grab his wrist and force him to stop.

  “Well…” I trail off because honestly I’m on the edge of my seat. I can’t even think of a reason they aren’t together.

  “She has severe memory loss. Amnesia. She took one look at me and didn’t even fucking know me. The doctors say she won’t get any of it back.” His sobs get worse and I’m at a loss as to what to do for him. I can’t even imagine. “I tried to be there for her but she wanted nothing to do with me. She won’t even communicate with me now.”

  Then it all becomes clear. “So you go after someone who looks like her. I don’t know whether I’m flattered or disgusted.”

  “I wouldn’t have even approached you but the guys on the team started saying shit about me being gay. I had to do something.”

  I get what he is saying. If everyone thinks he’s gay, then he would lose his chances of being in the NFL.

  The next morning I literally want to rip my brother’s balls off with my bare hands. He and Grace come out of his room at the crack of dawn holding hands. They are both in the clothes they wore last night. I kind of feel like my chest has been ripped open and Grace’s small hands reached in and tore out my heart. I do realize I shouldn’t think this way. I let her go to Jaden but I didn’t think anything would happen. I thought she would leave both of us alone. Not act like a total slut.

  My bad mood stays with me throughout the day while I help out in the kitchen with Thanksgiving dinner. I was surprised to find that Declan Sage could actually cook, apparently he has practically raised his little brother. Which means he’s had plenty of practice.

  It doesn’t help him though. I know who was in his room last night. You just wait ‘til I get my hands on little miss innocent Teagan Harper. My sister has a lecture coming. She can’t get mixed up with the likes of Declan. He would break her heart into a million pieces and I will be damned if that ever happened.

  As you can imagine I’m on a short leash today and I don’t think I will ever get out of it. How can I? My little sister is messing around with the biggest player I know. And the girl I want is sleeping with my brother. It’s enough to make me want to shoot something.


  I’m totally not paying attention and knock a bag of flour all over me. It literally rises up and gets in my hair and all over my face. “Caden! What in the world? Get this cleaned up and go take a shower!” my mom exclaims behind me and I find myself grinding my teeth.

  “Yeah, Mom.” I say cleaning up the mess I made. It takes me awhile and no one bothers to help. Figures. When I’m done, I don’t say anything as I head up the stairs to mine and Jaden’s bathroom. I quickly get my soiled clothes off and start the shower. I wait ‘til the water is nice and hot before getting in. I rush through it because I have no desire to miss any of the food. Or Teagan making googly eyes at Declan. When I finally turn the knobs off I feel nice and clean.

  I start to step out of the shower when the bathroom door suddenly opens. In walks my angel. I haven’t been this close to her in almost a month. I can’t help but remember the time I had her tied to my bed. Then Jaden had to come and fuck it up.

  Grace stands there staring at me with wide eyes. She never got to see me completely naked so when her eyes take in every inch of flesh I have exposed, my dick comes to attention. She opens her mouth to say something but closes it and meets my eyes. She swallows, hard. “See something you like?” I ask softly.

  I tip my head down a little and look at her from under my lashes. I bite the side of my lip and beg her to come over. Her cheeks blush beautifully and she clasps and unclasps her hands. “We can’t. Don’t look at me like that.” She closes her eyes and turns her head away. “I gave you a chance and you blew it off. I moved on. Don’t stand over there looking like a goddamn sex god. I cannot handle it.”

  “Come here, Grace. Don’t think about all that. I’ve got a hard on that has your name written all over it.” I’m probably pushing my luck but I don’t really care. She is the one girl I can’t run from. The one girl I want above all others. I can’t explain it but I know it’s real. Her soul speaks to mine and I want to learn all the secrets I know she is hiding.

  “Caden, please don’t. Seriously I can’t do this.” I pause with my hand reaching for my dick. Her accent disappeared just now. It went from being southern to northern. New York maybe. I shake my head because I really don’t want to go there right now.

  I step out of the shower and lay my towel down on the toilet seat. I walk right up to her in the small space of this bathroom. I reach around her waist and lock the bathroom door.

  I don’t think as I pull her against me and crush my lips to hers. I don’t think about my brother or anyone else that might be hurt because of my actions. He doesn’t want her like I want her. He doesn’t live because of Grace. I do. I may not know that much about love, but what I feel for this female in front of me is damn near close.

  Her tongue reaching out for mine brings me out of my crazy thoughts. She is wearing some frilly lace skirt, so I inch it up until I get ahold of her panties. They are down her legs and touching the floor in no time.

  “Tell me you want me. Tell me you’re mine. Tell me you haven’t fucked my brother.” I command as I slip a finger inside her. My voice breathless and hoarse.

  Her hands come up to cup my cheeks as she moans around my lips. “I haven’t fucked him. I only want you. I’m yours.” She whispers running kisses along my jaw and down my neck.

  I get an overwhelming need to be inside her. Mark her as mine. So I do. I spin her around until she ends up bent backwards over the counter, which holds the sink. I bend down and rummage through the space under the sink until I find a condom I had stashed under there. I stand up and roll the thing on. “Keep your hands above your head. If you lower them, I’ll stop and walk out of this room.”

  She nods and I don’t give her any warning as I push into her soaking wet heat. Thank the lord she was ready for me. We both groan as we finally come together. I set up a slow and easy pace, taking in all the little sounds she makes and the way her eyes keep rolling into the back of her head. I clutch her hips hard enough to bruise, but I can’t really seem to care at this point.

  I start to pound harder as a tingling sensation starts moving up my spine. Grace has her head leaning against the mirror and she is staring right at me. I almost blow with the look of pure lust she is throwing at me. I want her to look at me like this always. “Make me come, Caden.” She says on a moan.

  “Anything you want, Angel.” I take one of my hands from her waist and lower it to her sex. I flick her clit up and down just the way I know she likes it.

  “Oh my god, right there. Don’t stop.” She whispers arching her hips closer to me. Her hands stay above her head the entire time. I start to feel her inner walls clutching me and I speed up my thrusting. We both come at the same time and I swear to god I can’t feel my legs.

  After we get sent back to reality, Grace runs out of the bathroom like the hounds of hell are on her tail. I sigh and look at myself in the mirror. What the fuck did I just do?

  Thankfully when I finally make it down to the kitchen she isn’t around. I might say things in the heat of the moment, but I can’t really mean them. I have lost my damn mind.

  “You okay, Caden?” Declan asks me while cutting up some cranberry sauce for dinner.

  “Yeah. Why?” I narrow my eyes at him. Let him say anything to me I don’t like. I’ll tell this whole damn house what he was doing with my sister last night.

  “I don’t know you seem kind of out of it.” He shrugs his shoulders and goes on about his business.

  Yeah he could say that again. “I’m fine.” I grumble at him before heading into the dining room where mom is setting the table.

  “You mind if I head to the studio until dinner?” I seriously don’t feel like being around people right now.

  “Sure honey. You were only in the way down here.” She chuckles and I can’t help but give her a small grin.

  I try and keep my mind off what just happened. The one thing I was trying to prevent was hurting my brother. Then I go and do the one thing that will hurt him the most. I feel like complete shit and I hope he kicks my ass. Life could not get any worse at this point.

  I have my canvas and paint ready before I know it and I’m moving the brush along the blank screen. The picture comes to life without me even trying and I’m so fucking pissed off by what I create. I should have known better, I should have planned something out. Whenever I let my heart paint it gives me exactly what I want to see. Only problem is, this time it’s also something I shouldn’t want to see. Something I should have never seen.

  Grace’s back is bent over the counter in the bathroom. Her arms are above her head and there’s that look of lust I wish would never leave her face. Well maybe when she’s not looking at me. Her mouth forms a perfect ‘O’ as she comes and my dick comes to attention, already I want her again.

  How the fuck am I supposed to stay away from her now? How the hell do I get over this? All I want is to run around screaming that Grace is mine, like some stupid caveman. Because she is, if this afternoon wasn’t proof enough, then I don’t know what is. She wouldn’t have fucked me in that bathroom if she had true feelings for Jaden.

  The door to my studio opens without a knock and I get unbelievable pissed. “What the fuck?” I nearly yell. It’s my own damn fault I didn’t lock it.

  “Is that Jaden’s little girlfriend?” Forest asks, a look of shock written all over his face.

  I pinch the bridge between my eyes and pray for strength. I’m about the beat the shit out of my older brother. “Shut the fucking door, dude.” I spit out, venom in my voice.

  Forest slams the thing shut before walking over to me. I quickly take the painting to my closet and lock it away. “Please tell me what Jaden said isn’t true. You can’t have feelings for her.”

  I look up into his eyes with pure anger running through my veins. “I have more feelings for her then Jaden. You can believe that. And I can’t help I had her first or that she really wants me.” I know I should shut the hell up but I can’t. I have to get this out of me.

  “Whoa. He broke
the bro code?” shock appears over his face again and I’m starting to realize everyone seems to think Jaden is perfect. I guess I’m the only one who truly knows he’s not.

  “I’m tired of explaining that to people. I did everything I could to stay away from her. I can’t help how I feel.”

  Too late, I realize what I said.

  I really need a joint. Luckily I knew my nerves would get to me so I packed one in my bag. More like five. But hey who’s counting?

  The bathroom incident, as I have come to start calling it, was so wrong yet so right. I shouldn’t have let Caden do that to me. I should have run screaming in the other direction. I have never been a cheater and I never wanted to be one. Now that I am, I feel like complete shit and the guilt is eating at me. I want to tell Jaden but that doesn’t sound like a good idea.

  I know that Jaden deserves to know, don’t get me wrong, but who am I to ruin a brotherhood? I’m just some girl who doesn’t have a long-standing place in their lives. Betrayal is a something I know about and since I’m part of one now, I just can’t bring myself to hurt Jaden like that. I think he’s been hurt enough in his life. That stuff with his ex-girlfriend is more than I can handle. I’m trying to be there for him, but how can you complete with true love? You can’t.

  It was so hard to sit there during dinner and avoid Caden’s eyes. I could feel them staring holes into the side of my face but I just couldn’t bring myself to meet his eyes. It didn’t help that Jaden kept his hand on my thigh through most of dinner. Caden noticed that too and I could seem him clinching his fists against the tabletop.

  The conversation at dinner ranged from what is so wonderful about Declan Sage to what Hailey, Jaden and Caden’s niece had all over her face. Then these people made me sing. Luckily one of the sisters took pity on me and sang with me. I don’t want to relive that experience like ever.