Inwardly, she cringed. Although she didn’t mind Gregg and Ian being there, Nick could not come with them. His nearness made her too breathless and she couldn’t have Grant noticing.
Nick’s gaze remained on her. “I can’t speak for my brothers, but I’d love to go. I haven’t been to the opera in quite a while.” His voice stayed solemn, and she couldn’t read his expression.
“Splendid,” Grant said. “Will you inform your brothers of our plans?” He picked up the mostly empty tray and handed it to Hobbs. “I’m going to get plenty of rest today. I don’t want anything to ruin this evening.”
“Neither do I,” Nick replied.
Even with the terrible news of the nurse, she couldn’t stop her heart from skipping with anticipation. Then she scolded her reaction. Her only purpose tonight was to help Grant see they should not wed, and she’d do it – or die trying.
Chapter Thirteen
Nick stood down the hall from Catherine’s room, his gaze focused on her door. Her maid had been in there for over an hour, and he’d exhausted his patience wearing out the carpet while waiting. He had to see her again. Alone. Had to hold her, and kiss her, and tell her that he loved her.
And he had to convince himself Catherine had nothing to do with Mary’s death.
He shook that thought out of his head. Of course Catherine didn’t. Just because she had been suspicious of Mary’s closeness with his uncle didn’t mean anything.
Or did it?
Growling, he pushed his fingers through his hair. No, Catherine wasn’t capable of such a thing. A crazed person was to blame for murdering a servant in such a violent way, not the woman he loved with all his heart. And he’d forget about the misleading comments Colonel Martin had put into his head earlier. No matter what her father said, Catherine did not kill Mary.
His uncle had taken Mary’s death harder than Nick figured he would. So perhaps Grant was in love with Mary and not Catherine…
Nick shook his head. The duke confused him greatly. Perhaps it was his illness making him seem like a different person. Sometimes the old man acted like he couldn’t wait to marry Catherine, and other times he would rather pawn her onto Nick or his brothers. He wondered if his uncle did this just so he could spend more time with Mary, which was how it really appeared.
He strode to the hall window and peered outside. Night had blanketed the land, only the full moon gave light to the creatures of the dark. Scrubbing his hand over his face, he sighed. If he could have changed the way things had ended with Catherine last night, he would. He didn’t mean for his confession of love to sound like a farewell. That was far from what he wanted. Deep emotions ran through him, telling him he could never say goodbye to her. No matter if she married his uncle, he would always love her.
The whistling of the maid drew his attention toward Catherine’s room. Emily walked out and closed the door, then strolled the opposite way.
Smoothing his hand down his blue waistcoat and straightening his neck-cloth, he hurried toward her room, his heart beating quicker than his hurried steps. He’d dressed in his best black coattails and trousers, hoping to make an impression on Catherine. He reached the door and stopped, taking a deep breath before turning the knob. Quiet as he could be, he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him.
She hadn’t heard him as she leaned over the vanity table to pick up her earbobs. He caught his breath. Hair fashioned in a twist on the back of her head, there were only a few tendrils of hair left around her neck and ears. Dressed in a black satin evening gown with short bell-shaped sleeves that hung off her shoulders, she looked as regal and refined as any woman of the ton.
She straightened and looked his way, then gasped. “Nick, you should really think about knocking before you enter my room.” Her voice shook.
“As you wish. I’ll think about it before I enter.” He grinned.
“No, what I meant to say was that you shouldn’t just walk into my room. It’s not proper.”
He moved away from the door and stood in front of her. “Since when have we ever been proper?”
His fingers caressed her cheek softly. Her chest rose and fell quickly, and he dropped his gaze to her mouth, knowing he shouldn’t kiss her, but wanting it nonetheless.
“Since I’ve realized the mistake in not doing so before,” she said, pushing his hand away as she tried to walk past him, but he grabbed her arm, stopping her.
“You look breathtaking tonight. Do you know how hard it’s going to be to keep my eyes off you?”
“Then maybe you had better stay home.”
He stepped closer and pulled on her arm until she fell against him. He circled her in his embrace. “There’s no way I’m going to stay away from you tonight. Not when you look as beautiful as you do.”
She squirmed, but he held her tight.
“Nick, please let me go,” she begged.
His heart twisted. He’d never force his attentions on women, but to let this one go was utterly impossible. “Before I leave, I want to give you something.” He released her and reached in his jacket, pulling out a long black velvet box. “This is from – well, you know.”
He held the box while she opened it. There, lying surrounded by black velvet was a sparkling diamond necklace. The chain glittered, but not as much as the cluster of diamonds at the base.
Catherine’s eyes widened and she touched it in reverence. “Oh, Nick. It’s so lovely.”
“It will be even prettier when wore by a beautiful woman.”
She smiled at him then looked at the necklace. “Why didn’t Grant give this to me himself?”
“I cannot fathom, unless he was upset over Mary’s death.” He took the necklace then stepped around back of her. “May I?”
While she held still, he placed it around her neck. Before he stepped away, he bent and brushed his mouth across her neck. She hitched a breath and shivered.
Hesitantly, he pulled away and offered his arm. “Shall we go, my sweet?”
She nodded. “You go down first. I don’t want anyone to know we walked out of my room together.”
“As you wish, but hurry. I can’t bear to be away from you for very long.” He gave her a wink and left.
With his heart still thumping madly in his chest, he met his brothers, uncle, and Gertie in the parlor. Mumbling filled the room – all talk about Mary’s death. It seemed everyone wanted to figure out what happened.
Grant looked his way. “Do you know if Catherine is coming, Nick?”
“I think she is. Her maid left her room as I was leaving mine.”
“Oh, this evening will be a delight with Catherine coming along.” His Aunt fluttered a fan in front of her face. “She’ll bring joy to our dreary evening.”
“Yes, she will sister, dear.” Grant nodded.
Across the room, Gregg threw Nick a glare. His brother couldn’t possibly know what happened last night when he went to Catherine’s room. Perhaps Gregg noticed the sappy look Nick knew had probably been plastered on his face as of late. The same look Gregg had been wearing recently.
Thankfully, Catherine’s father wasn’t coming with them tonight. The older man claimed a headache and said he couldn’t make it. At least that was one less person Nick had to worry about upsetting tonight.
The clicking of women’s heeled slippers on the marbled floor drew his attention to the doorway. Catherine walked in, and Nick’s heart jumped to his throat. She looked as regal as a Queen.
“Good evening, gentlemen. Miss Gertrude.” Catherine’s voice lifted in a magical tune.
Grant stepped to her and took her hands. “Catherine, my dear, you’re so very lovely. You’ll be the prettiest woman at the opera.” He dropped her hand and touched her necklace. “What a remarkable piece of jewelry. Is it one you purchased while in town the other day?”
Inwardly, Nick cringed. Why did his uncle have to go and say that? Now she’ll know it was a gift from Nick. He worried she wouldn’t accept it if she knew the truth.
<
br /> Her brow creased and her gaze darted to him, but within seconds it flew back to Grant, the color of her face growing red.
“Uh – no, I didn’t. I’ve had this for a while now. It...it was my mother’s.”
Grant smiled. “Well, I think it’s beautiful on you.”
“Thank you.”
Grant held out his elbow. “Are you ready to go? I can hardly wait to show you off. Tonight is going to be absolutely wonderful.”
A bitter taste formed on Nick’s tongue when his uncle escorted Catherine out to their carriage, his aunt trailing behind them. Nick wanted to run after them, to claim the woman who’d stolen his heart in front of everyone… In front of the whole world if he had to.
Despairingly, he trudged to the coach with his brothers. Ian chatted as if he didn’t notice the animosity that hung thick in the air while Gregg aimed his glare at Nick.
Adjusting in his seat, Nick stared out the window, hoping the night would pass quickly; hoping he’d be able to control his feelings of jealousy whenever another man looked at her.
At the theater the family was bombarded with people. Most came over to look upon the new woman in Grant’s life, yet they were pleasant about it. Even Lady Ruthaford was polite when she mentioned how well Grant looked.
Catherine and Aunt Gertrude were invited to a couple of brunches for the following week, which Catherine accepted quickly, and they were all invited to the Ruthaford’s ball that night. Nick stood back as the future Duchess of Ashton conversed with his family’s friends and associates. The years she’d attended the girls’ school were not wasted. She made the Fielding family proud.
The family made their way to the box before the opera began. Catherine’s gaze met his briefly before Grant seated her on the first row then took the seat next to her. Nick’s heart picked up rhythm. The next chair on the other side of her was empty. He glanced at his aunt who scooted her way on the back row to the end. Quickly, he sat beside Catherine before Gregg decided it was his chair. Her body stiffened, but she didn’t look his way. His brothers sat behind them with their aunt.
When the opera began, Catherine straightened and focused on the stage. Theater workers moved from box to box dimming the lights. Nick turned slightly and bumped his arm against her and meaningfully leaned his leg very close to hers. She still refused to look at him.
After a while, their close contact didn’t seem to bother her. Her shoulders relaxed as she kept her stare focused to the stage.
Nick had no clue what the opera was about, nor did he care. He’d rather watch her out of the corner of his eyes. Definitely more interesting. The most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, she outshone all the others here.
Within time, his brothers fell asleep, their light snores almost matching his uncle’s and Aunt Gertrude’s. Usually Nick would be nodding off about this time, but not tonight. Especially when they were sitting so close.
Shifting, he turned more toward her as he slipped his arm behind to rest on the back of the chair. So engrossed with the opera, she didn’t seem to notice. Everything was perfect as long as Catherine didn’t make any noise or sudden movements, she wouldn’t be drawing attention to herself or to him.
Very softly he brushed his fingers across her shoulder. She stiffened, but still refused to look his way. His other hand reached to her clasped hands and rested over them. She sucked in a quick breath. He grinned.
Tenderly, he rubbed his finger across her knuckle. Soon, she moved her hands to hold his. He kept it this way for a few seconds without doing anything, and he felt the erratic beat of her heart pounded fiercely against his palm. Because of the dim lighting, he knew nobody below would be able to see them holding hands.
Nick leaned closer and whispered in her ear, “I love you, Kitty.”
She shook her head, but didn’t tear her eyes from the stage. “Nick, don’t say that now,” she whispered back.
She turned her head and met his gaze. Her face was very near his, which made his heart quicken even more.
“But it’s what I feel.”
“No, Nick. We cannot talk this way.” She wrung her hand free from his and turned away, making it final.
Under his breath, he grumbled. She loved him as much as he loved her. He knew it. Although, why hadn’t she said the actual words after he had confessed last night? Doubt snuck in his head, making him question her feelings for him.
Closing his eyes, he prayed for strength and courage. His faith had been wavering lately, only because he didn’t think the Lord wanted him to be happy. Especially lately. Would the Lord grant him this one request – to have Catherine as his wife?
But as the situation looked, that was utterly impossible.
* * * *
Nick stood against the wall with folded arms. On the dance floor, another man swept by with Catherine in his hold as they danced. As usual, guests crowded the ballroom. He noticed a few acquaintances and wanted to strike up conversation, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off Catherine long enough to understand what they were saying.
Every time a different man came to claim her, Nick’s heart broke a little more. Yet he couldn’t look away. Feasting his eyes on Catherine fed life into his very soul; kept him wanting to make it to the next day just to see her beautiful smile. Jealousy ate at him like a slow-growing disease...Catherine’s love the only cure.
Beside him, his uncle’s stare turned toward the dancing couples, and Nick wondered just how much Grant actually saw. The old man’s mouth turned up at the corners, his foot tapped in rhythm to the tune the orchestra played.
“Uncle Grant, how are you faring this evening?”
Grant met his gaze and smiled wider. “It’s been an exemplary evening. One of the best I’ve experienced in a very long time.”
Nick clapped his hand on his uncle’s shoulder and squeezed. “I must admit, it’s been a while since I’ve noticed that twinkle in your eyes.”
The older man chuckled. “Catherine has a way of making me feel young again.”
Nick frowned. “Indeed, she does.” He glanced toward the middle of the dance floor again just to look upon her beauty. “I’ve also noticed she’s not the only person to make you feel different.”
Grant arched his brow, his head cocked to one side. “Pardon me?”
He leaned in closer to personalize their conversation. “Before Mary’s death, I noticed how the two of you looked at each other.”
The duke gasped, his body stiffening. Even his jaw hardened. “Why do you say that?”
“Don’t you think I check on you from time to time?”
Grant straightened and folded his arms. “That is none of your concern.”
“Uncle Grant, there’s no need to get snippy with me. I’m just worried about your welfare.”
“That’s rubbish.” His uncle scowled. “I cannot believe I’m being lectured by my nephew.”
Nick chuckled. “Where the two of you...being cozy with one another?”
His uncle remained silent.
“Mary was a very nice woman, I must admit. So I wouldn’t blame you for having different feelings for her.”
Grant huffed and turned away, which made Nick chuckle again. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
Over his shoulder, Grant threw him another scowl.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed. The secret is out.”
Grant spun around with his hands planted on his hips. “Enough. My feelings don’t matter in the least, especially now that she’s dead.”
Nick nodded. He’d never seen his uncle so flustered before.
Grant grasped his arm. “Now will you cease this insanity? I don’t wish to draw attention.”
Nick sobered. “Forgive me. It’s...well, it’s a surprise to hear that you’ve had feelings for your nurse this whole time.”
Grant shrugged. “There’s no use worrying about it now. I think Catherine suspected, too.”
“I’m sorry that someone killed her.”
Grant frowned as tears gather
ed. “I hope they catch the killer and hang him!”
Nick patted his uncle’s shoulder. “They will. I’m certain of it. And I’m glad you finally confessed.”
“Well, as long as my beautiful Catherine never finds out, I will not worry about it.”
Although Nick kept his smile, his heart ached. This only meant one thing. With Mary out of the picture, his uncle still wanted to marry Catherine. All his humor disappeared and he leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. Once Catherine married his uncle, life would cease to exist.
“What bothers you now, Nick?”
He shrugged. “I’m still worried about your health.”
“No need. I get stronger every day.”
Nick studied his uncle. Why didn’t he believe him? If his health improved, then why didn’t his eyesight?
“Uncle Grant? When are you planning on marrying Catherine?”
The lines in the duke’s face relaxed. A gentle smile touched his mouth. “Soon, I hope. I told her not too long ago that I would announce our engagement, but things kept coming up and putting off the announcement.” He met Nick’s gaze. “Have you settled your mind about Catherine?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean – do you approve of my new wife yet? Not too long ago you were extremely vexed that I would choose such a young woman to have as my wife.”
Nick took a deep breath and slowly released it. “I will say this...I do understand why you picked Catherine. She’s a delightful and charming woman and will make the perfect wife.”
Leaning against the wall, Grant chuckled. “I thought you’d come to that conclusion sooner or later.”
A knot formed in Nick’s throat and pain pierced his heart. “I still don’t understand why you want to marry your childhood friends’ daughter, though.” He voiced his opinion, whether it mattered or not. “Why not pick a more experienced woman? Maybe a widow?”
“Because Henry Martin and I wanted to join our families together. This was the only way I could see doing it.”
Nick fisted his hands. Why hadn’t his uncle wanted to arrange a marriage between Nick and Catherine instead? Then again, it was his duty as the one who would inherit the dukedom to marry a woman with lands and wealth…just as the oldest Fielding men had always done.
Love Me Always (The Fielding Brothers' Saga) Page 16
