Dating A Saint

by Donna McDonald

  “Well, that should be a sign to you then,” Lydia said with a satisfied smile. “Lauren’s not interested in you.”

  “Yes, she is,” Jim said back firmly, narrowing his eyes at the obstinate woman. “And I’m just as interested in her. Lauren is well aware of the details of my marriage. I’ve hidden nothing from her. It’s a fact I’m not free to marry her, but I belong to your daughter in every other way. She’s the only woman in my life. That’s all I’m comfortable sharing with you.”

  Lauren turned her head and looked at Jim. Why was he telling her mother he belonged to her? Did Jim think he was protecting her image, that her mother would accept his explanation? Lydia McCarthy was too self-serving to care about truth.

  Lauren decided she didn’t need his help that badly. She could deal with her mother herself.

  “Mother, I am never going back to Jared Smith and his horde of women. I can’t even bear the thought of him touching me again. I honestly don’t know why you think Jared is suitable for me in any way at all,” Lauren said finally. “At least with Jim, I’m only sharing him with one other woman.”

  Jim reached over and picked up one of Lauren’s hands. It was cold as ice. “I’m trying to change my situation. I don’t want you to have to share me with anyone.”

  Her look of surprise was like a hard punch in the gut. He should have told her, Jim realized. Barrett advised him to tell her, but he’d let his disappointment in the outcome of his efforts stop him.

  “You’re trying to change—your situation?” Lauren asked, unwilling to reveal anything to her mother Jim wasn’t willing to tell Lydia himself.

  “Yes,” Jim said quietly. “But so far, nothing is working out the way I want it to.”

  Jim looked back at Lydia McCarthy. “For the moment, your daughter and I are just really good friends. I don’t intend things to remain that way, Lydia. You need to get used to me being in Lauren’s life.”

  “I don’t have to get used to anything,” Lydia said firmly, condescension dripping from the words. “Your money does not give you the right to force yourself on Lauren.”

  “What the hell does my money have to do with anything?” Jim said, exasperated with the unreasonable woman. “Good lord, I’m not trying to buy Lauren—I just want to be with her. Damn it, Lydia. I’m falling in love with her. Can’t you just accept that simple fact?”

  “You will never be the man in my daughter’s life,” Lydia declared.

  “Enough of this,” Lauren yelled, letting go of Jim’s hand and standing up. “Mother, Jim already is the man in my life, and for right now, he’s the only man in my life. If you think Jared Smith is so great, you sleep with him. But I’ll just warn you, Jared doesn’t last long and you’ll be damn lucky to get an orgasm out of him before he moves on to the next conquest.”

  “Lauren, I find your comments simply appalling and refuse to listen to any more nonsense. You need better friends. Hanging out with those immoral women is ruining your manners. You have a vulgar mouth now. I raised you better,” Lydia said, gathering her things.

  Relieved her mother was finally leaving, Lauren followed her to the door. “No, you raised me to be quiet about what I wanted, what I needed. I’m too old to do that anymore and you are too. I’m sleeping with a married man by choice this time. Sorry I picked a womanizing cheater you don’t approve of, but Jim is at least my choice,” she said, closing door with a sharp click as her mother exited.

  She remained in front of the door for a few more moments, hands on hips, eyes closed, trying to calm down. When she opened her eyes, she saw Jim leaning against the doorway of the living room. His mouth was smiling, but his gaze was still concerned.

  “Technically, we’re not sleeping together yet,” Jim corrected smugly, laughing at her hissing.

  Lauren glared at him. “Well, fuck you and your technicalities,” she spat, her face flooding with heat, angry to be reminded so glaringly that she was the only one who knew the truth.

  She turned to go into the kitchen before she started breaking things, starting with Jim’s head.

  “Sleeping with you is actually what I came to talk to you about,” Jim said loudly, following close behind her.

  “Back off, if you don’t want to end up on the floor again,” she warned, stepping away from him quickly.

  Jim wisely walked across the room and perched on a bar stool. “I like your kitchen. I don’t think I told you when I was here before. Do you make your perfumes here?”

  Lauren got a bottle of wine out of the refrigerator and two glasses. “Yes. I set the equipment up on the marble countertop. I didn’t design the kitchen to use it for that purpose, but it works well for it.”

  “I rarely use my kitchen at all. I gave a party two years ago. The caterers were probably the last ones to do anything with it,” he said, taking the glass she slid across the counter to him.

  “Enough small talk,” Lauren said harshly. “Between you and my mother, I am not in a good mood. What did you come by for?”

  “Are you trying to trick me into showing you so you’ll have an excuse to take your anger out on someone?” Jim asked, sipping slowly.

  “Wow. You must have had a good breakfast this morning. You’re too smart for me today,” Lauren said sarcastically, turning her back to him before tipping her glass and draining it.

  Hearing Jim’s laughter made her gut churn with desire. If he put his hands on her, she was going to drag him to the floor and do what she’d been dreaming about for days.

  And she’d be damned if he got to control any of it this time.

  “Hi,” Jim said, making her jump with his nearness. She hadn’t heard him get up or walk around to her. “Are you going to let me kiss you hello?”

  “It’s not safe for you to make a move on me yet,” Lauren warned, but she licked her lips and waited as he lowered his head millimeter by millimeter to hers.

  Lauren flinched when the doorbell rang. “Oh, fucking hell, this is turning out to be the lousiest day.”

  Stomping to the door with more of Jim’s laughter trailing after her, she yanked the door open, not bothering to see who it was first.

  A uniformed man holding a box smiled at her. “Delivery for Lauren McCarthy,” he said politely.

  “Thanks.” Lauren said in return, sighing in consternation at her lousy mood and terrible manners.

  She signed his form, took the box, and set it in the hallway. When she started back to the kitchen, she found Jim and his massive shoulders blocking the doorway.

  “Move,” she ordered, expecting him to do as she asked now that he knew the consequences of making her angry.

  “Make me,” Jim said softly, lowering his gaze to look at her mouth with undisguised longing.

  She grabbed two solid handfuls of his suit coat and his shirt, and swung him against the door jam out of her way. But instead of walking by him, like she intended, Lauren pushed herself against him, effectively into his arms.

  “Why did you tell my mother those things?” she demanded, eyes tearing up at how badly she wanted them to be true, how much she wanted Jim to hug her, tell her he meant everything.

  “Oh God, Lauren, I am so sorry I’ve disappointed you up to now. Let me show you why I told your mother those things,” Jim said, his hands sweeping possessively down her curves through the unflattering dress. “I want you, Lauren McCarthy. One day soon, I’m going to have you in every way possible, but for now, I’d like to at least finish what I started the other day—if you’ll let me.”

  “Why should I risk this again?” Lauren said, eyes closing as she leaned against him.

  In answer, Jim gathered handfuls of her full skirt until he had pulled most of it up to her waist. Under the yards and yards of fabric, he found garters, lace stockings, and panties with little snaps he knew would give way under pressure.

  “Well, hello, Sexy. Lydia would have been absolutely shocked at what you were hiding under this ugly, unflattering dress. She would be even more shocked at what I plan t
o do to you,” he whispered against her mouth.

  “Have you been practicing how to be nice to me?” Lauren asked, sniffling to avoid giving in to the deluge that threatened.

  Jim sighed and pulled Lauren closer. If she cried, he was going to end up in tears as well for the distance he had forced between them. That wasn’t what needed to happen.

  “I’ve been practicing how to be nice to both of us,” Jim told her truthfully. “Now it’s your turn to reciprocate. Kiss me, Lauren. Forgive me the past, and give me your passion.”

  Her mouth gladly found his and explored his desire for her, absorbing the groan welling up in him. She felt him moving the skirt as far out of the way as he could. He cupped her backside with an unrestrained enthusiasm she’d given up hope of ever igniting in him.

  Jim wrenched his mouth from hers. “Lauren, I meant every word I said to your mother about being yours in every way I can make possible. Do you believe me?”

  She hid her face in his shoulder. “Yes. I guess I do, or at least—I want to believe it.”

  “Good,” he said. “Now let me touch you so we can be lovers for real. I swear you won’t be sorry this time.”

  The snaps on her underwear gave way and Jim tossed them aside without waiting for her answer. With one hand braced behind her hips at the edge of her garter belt, Jim let the other move over the mound of softness in front until he slipped two fingers inside her welcoming heat again. This time his touch was sure, his fingers confident. This time he reveled in her submission to him, her obvious desire.

  “Don’t be afraid to give yourself to me. I promise to never leave you hanging again,” he said, stroking her wet heat and fully appreciating the gift this time, as she leaned heavily against him. “From this moment forward, any time you let me touch you I will consider it a gift.”

  “Jim,” Lauren called, trying hard to not sob, or to beg him for the release she needed.

  He laughed softly. “Trust me just a little more, baby. Grab the door jam if you start to fall.”

  “Why?” Lauren asked, dizzy with lust and close, oh so close to heaven.

  Jim slid his back down the door jam until his knees hit the floor. He knew she had no choice but to brace herself over him. He pulled her hips forward until he found what he was looking for with his mouth, and then there was nothing but the sound of Lauren sobbing and calling his name.

  When she quieted, Jim got to his feet again still holding her. Then he swung a compliant Lauren up into his arms and walked with her to the living room couch. He sat and held her in his lap, rocking her with his body until her crying died down.

  “I know what we just did doesn’t make up for all the other times I let you down, but I’d like to think of it as a start,” he said to her at last. “Retire your toys for good, honey. I want to give you everything you need.”

  Completely undone, in almost every way, Lauren pulled the hem of her dress up and wiped her eyes and nose. “I hate this dress. I feel so frumpy in it. I have to put the garters on under it just so I can stand it. If I wear my normal clothes, my mother complains about how big I look.”

  Jim laughed and found a cleaner, drier part of the skirt, handing it to her as well. “You should always wear clothes that show off those incredible legs of yours. You have an amazing body. Are you sure Lydia is really your mother?”

  “Unfortunately yes,” Lauren sniffed. “I can hear myself using her snide tone when I really get mad.”

  “Well, I hear Alexa’s and Regina’s influence in that comment,” Jim said, laughing. “Your mother is completely wrong about them. Your friends are some of the best women I’ve ever known, Lauren.”

  “I know,” she said, burrowing more into his clothes, making sure she wasn’t crying on his suit. “You didn’t even remove your jacket, Jim.”

  “My timing is terrible and I’m out of practice,” Jim said on a laugh. “I wasn’t taking any chances—and I for damn sure wasn’t stopping. I learned my lesson from the first ass kicking.”

  Now it was Lauren’s turn to laugh. “What about you?” Lauren asked, unable to meet his gaze with her own. He’d satisfied her, but not himself.

  “Don’t worry about me,” Jim said, brushing her hair behind her ear. “I can’t have you once and leave. It would kill me more than not having you at all. I’ve been dreaming about you for days.”

  While part of her wanted to believe Jim meant what he was saying, the other part wondered when his guilt was going to kick back in again. But then who was she to talk? She still wasn’t ready to risk telling him about what had already happened between them. If all she eventually had left from their time together was a bunch of memories, she’d take all she could get. It was more than she’d had for seven years.

  “Come back whenever you want,” she told him at last. “You’re now officially the only man in my life. No more random dating for me.”

  Jim gathered her more into his arms.

  “Glad to hear it. I am coming back to you Lauren. I just have a few more things to work out,” Jim told her. “Can I just sit here with you for a while?”

  “I have nothing better to do than be with you,” Lauren said, tucking her head into his shoulder. It wasn’t long before all the nights without him caught up to her, and she fell asleep in his arms.

  Several hours later, Lauren woke in her guest room again, covered with the throw from the couch. The difference was this time she knew exactly how she got there.

  Chapter 15

  Even though Alexa was still away on her honeymoon, Regina had been concerned enough about Lauren’s well-being to insist they get together for dinner anyway. She checked her watch for probably the twentieth time. It just wasn’t like Lauren to be so late.

  Regina pulled her bag into her lap and started looking for her cell phone. Before she’d had a chance to check it for messages, Lauren walked up wearing jeans, a tee shirt, and long earrings. She looked lovely and very young, Regina thought, admiring the softness in her friend’s expression. She also looked like a woman in love.

  “There you are,” Regina said, relieved. “I was starting to worry. You look as young as Jenna in those clothes, by the way.”

  “That’s ironic,” Lauren said with a small laugh. “It’s been one of those days that make you feel very old and mature. Conflict, conflict, and more conflict—if I look good, it’s a miracle.”

  “Sit. Tell me all about it. Oh, here’s the waiter back,” Regina said, gracing the young man with a smile.

  “Double cognac on the rocks and a glass of water,” Lauren said before Regina could order.

  Regina’s alarm system went off at the mention of hard liquor, wondering what was driving Lauren to lose herself in booze again.

  “Ah—just mineral water with lemon for me,” Regina told him, as naturally as possible so Lauren wouldn’t notice. The waiter looked at her with a question in his gaze. “It’s okay, Roger. I’m—abstaining tonight.”

  “Since when?” Lauren asked with a laugh as the waiter walked away.

  Regina searched Lauren’s gaze and found what she was looking for, what she had suspected. “I want to be completely sober when you tell me about what happened between you and Jim today. And no, it’s not obvious. I’m a trained observer.”

  “That’s really annoying, Regina. Are you ever wrong?” Lauren asked sharply, but she didn’t have enough emotional energy to maintain her irritation. She truly just wondered how the woman could always tell.

  “Oh, I’m wrong all the time,” Regina said, dismissing Lauren’s condemning praise with a wave of her hand. “I make people mad. I hurt people’s feelings. I poke at my friends and make them do things they don’t want. And occasionally, I’m even wrong about couples working things out—like with Jenna and Seth, for instance. I know I told Jenna to date other men, but inside I secretly still believe they’re right for each other. I’m a hopeless romantic.”

  “I think Jenna and Seth are right for each other too,” Lauren agreed, unrolling her silverware
, and placing the white napkin across her denim-clad legs. “Jim told my mother he belonged to me today. I seconded his declaration because she was telling him he was wrong like I wasn’t in the room. After the third time Jim defended me, I had to stick up for myself instead of just ignoring her. Eventually, she got mad at both of us and left.”

  Regina blinked. Lauren stood up to her mother—because of Jim. It was more than she could have ever hoped to happen.

  Regina paused her reply while the waiter set glasses of water on the table then left to retrieve Lauren’s cognac.

  “I’m suddenly wishing I had something stronger than fizzy water. Are you—well, what did you think about what Jim said?”

  Lauren closed her eyes, remembering the fight in the foyer and what happened in the kitchen.

  “Jim said and did a lot of things today,” she said softly. “We had a fight, made up, and I fell asleep in his lap only to wake up in my guestroom alone. He must have carried me to bed before he left. Now I feel so—vulnerable, I guess. I don’t remember Jared ever making me feel this way. I liked being independent and not needing a man.”

  “I hear you, honey. I felt very vulnerable with Ben after the first time we were intimate together,” Regina said, sipping her water. “He was so much more than I was expecting, and much more than I had ever had. I couldn’t figure out how or why he was risking so much for me. His devotion scared me to death.”

  “Really?” Lauren asked, thinking Regina was just saying this to make her feel better.

  “Yes,” Regina said. “Ben was amazing in bed and the perfect gentleman afterward. Knowing how crazy my life was, I felt very unworthy of the loyalty and sexual fidelity he gave me without being asked. I’ve never been so conflicted in my entire life. It took me weeks to be able to enjoy him fully. If he hadn’t pursued me and insisted we find ways to be together, I would probably have let things end between us—that’s how unworthy of him I felt.”

  “Alexa told me she had doubts about Casey too. I guess even the best of relationships have challenges,” Lauren said sadly.