Bracing the Blue Line

by Lindsay Paige

  With a lot of care not to disturb Audra, I kiss her stomach before leaning back into my seat. I actually feel a little better. Maybe I am going crazy. About thirty minutes pass and she still hasn't woken up. I grab the notepad and pen on the end table and write a note that I left. Quietly, I go to the door, turn the knob, and I'm so close to stepping through the threshold when I hear Audra's voice.

  “Neil?”

  Turning, I face her, closing the door almost all the way. She's sitting up, watching me. “You were sleeping, so I was going to head home before I have to go into work.”

  “Oh, sorry about falling asleep on you.”

  “It's fine. Later.” I turn once again, but she stops me.

  “Neil?”

  “Yeah?” I look at her to see that she's standing now and moving towards me, but she stops about halfway.

  “I just wanted to apologize again about what I said.”

  I give her a little smile. “It's okay, Audra. Promise. I should go, though.”

  “Right. Bye.”

  One final time, I turn to leave, opening the door all the way. On the other side stands some chick, who smiles when she sees me.

  “Well, hello hottie. Would you like-”

  “Don't even!” Audra almost shouts, rushing to stand in front of me, holding her arm out behind her like she wants me to stay back. “He's off limits, Mimi, so don't even say it.”

  The girl, Mimi, looks me over again. “He's too hot to be off limits, Audra. Who is he anyway?”

  “Neil,” I offer. Mimi's eyes widen, and she's connected the dots of how I know Audra. I put my hands on Audra's shoulders and twirl her to face me. “I'll see you tomorrow. Call me if you need anything.” She nods. I kiss her temple before stepping around the girls to leave finally, not exactly knowing what to think about this Mimi, Audra's reaction to whatever she was going to say, and the kiss I gave her.

  MY EYES ARE trying their hardest to shut as I buckle up. I've just finished working for the night and it's tempting to sleep in my car instead of driving home. The loud ringing of my phone snaps me out of it for now. When I pull it out of my pocket and see Audra's name, panic sweeps through me. What has happened? Why is she calling me so late?

  Gulping, I answer, “Audra? Is everything okay?”

  “Yeah, everything's fine. I haven't been able to sleep and I'd really hate to bother my parents, so-”

  “So you called to bother me?” I chuckle.

  Audra laughs softly. “Pretty much. Could you come over? Are you still at work?”

  “Just got off, but I can come over if you want me to.” Not sure how that will help, but okay.

  “Thanks, Neil.” She pauses, hesitating before adding, “Would it be too much trouble to stop by the store?”

  “No,” I answer, cranking my car. Looks like I won't be getting home any time soon. “What do you want?”

  “Pretzels.”

  “Pretzels?” I question as I back out and start heading towards the nearest 24-hour grocery store.

  “And cheese sticks. And maybe some chocolate pudding too.”

  Shaking my head at her, I laugh. “Pretzels, cheese sticks, and chocolate pudding? Anything else?”

  “No, I think that's it. Are you sure you don't mind?”

  “Not at all. Almost to the store now, so I should be there in twenty or thirty minutes. Text me if you think of anything else, though I can't promise you'll get it. I won't go back to the store after I've left.”

  “Okay. Thanks, Neil.”

  “Welcome.” I hang up, having the urge to bang my head against my steering wheel. I need sleep. Not to run around, buying things to satisfy Audra's wacky cravings. With a deep breath, I push the negative thoughts away. Those aren't going to do me any good anyway. As fast as I can, I grab what Audra wants, ignore the curious look from the cashier, and go to her place.

  It takes her a moment to answer, almost giving me enough time to rest my head on the doorframe. Even a few seconds of sleep would be good. Audra looks relieved when she opens the door and sees me. I hand her the bag as I'm invited in. She rubs her lower back on her way to the kitchen. I go sit on the couch, and she appears moments later with a spoon.

  “Sit here,” I tell her, patting my thighs twice.

  “Why?”

  “Just do it.”

  “I might break your legs.” She looks really serious, and I laugh.

  “You aren't that big. Sit.”

  Audra does, placing the bag on the coffee table in front of her, and she leans forward to pull out her item of choice. She goes for the pudding first.

  “Do you trust me?” I ask. She shrugs. I rest my fingers on her shoulder and begin to massage. A low moan escapes her lips, causing me to smile. She doesn't say anything as I work my thumbs down her back along her spine. When I get to her lower back, the moan is louder. I swallow hard when I realize the sounds she's making are turning me on.

  “God, I forgot how good you were with your hands. First my feet and now this, mmm,” she finishes in an appreciative hum.

  “Be quiet and eat your food,” I mutter.

  I keep massaging while she moves on to the pretzels and a cheese stick. My yawning is getting out of control, but Audra hasn't noticed yet. My hands slow as all my energy starts to leave me. I've been up for almost twenty-four hours. Sleep, that's what I need. My eyes droop close, but they peer open when Audra looks over her shoulder at me.

  “Oh! God, I'm so sorry. Look at you. You're exhausted and I'm keeping you awake.”

  Barely. “I'm going to sleep right here, okay? Not a good idea to drive.” All my thoughts are revolved around three words: Go to sleep.

  Audra stands, nodding, and my body moves almost on its own accord. I lay down, stuffing the throw pillow under my head. My eyes close as a cover is placed over me.

  “Do you have a morning class?” I hear.

  Not sure if I answer or not before I'm asleep.

  “NEIL DIDN'T COME home?” Bo questions, his brows furrowing.

  “Doesn't look like it,” I answer, grabbing a bowl for some cereal.

  “He's not answering,” he comments. I look over my shoulder to see his phone pressed to his ear.

  “Should we be worried?” I question with confusion. It's not like Neil hasn't stayed out all night before. He hasn't since he's been working, but hey, maybe he found some chick to bang after work.

  “I don't know,” Bo replies and I can hear the worry in his voice. “He does get off really late and he would have been up for almost an entire day by the time he got off. He might have fallen asleep while driving...”

  “I'm touched you're so worried,” Neil voices as he rounds the corner into the kitchen.

  “You look like hell,” I say, taking a seat at the table to eat. His hair is all over the place and he's still in his rumpled work uniform. He even has bags under his eyes.

  Neil groans and sinks into a chair. “Fuck, it's going to be a long day and a long week.”

  “Where were you?” Bo asks.

  Neil quickly looks at me, almost so quickly that I could have missed it if I wasn't already looking at him. “Crashed at a friend's place that's close to work. It was late, and I was too tired to stay awake long enough to drive here.”

  Bo nods in understanding. “Go shower and be thankful we have the day off from hockey.”

  Neil folds his arms on the table and rests his forehead on them. “Let me rest here for a minute first.”

  Again, I wonder why the hell he has a job. He's going to burn himself out, either in school or hockey. We need him in tip top shape and the job is hindering him. I don't know Neil's business, so I can't say anything.

  After I finish eating, I go to my room to start on my task for today. I don't have a lot of time before class, but I plan to take advantage of our day off and stop by between classes to get everything ready. Once Maddie went home last night, the plan started to form. Tonight, I'm going to ask her out. I'm going to fix things between us and start anew.
At least, I hope so.

  My stomach tightens at the thought. For the millionth time, I wonder if I should or should not. This will open a whole new can of worms full of potentially rotten ones. She's Dave's sister. If Maddie said yes and we start dating again, how am I going to tell my best friend? If things go bad, I could lose that friendship. We've been friends for too long. I'm not supposed to find her attractive or even want to ask her out. Pretty sure I'm supposed to view her as my own little sister, but that's never been the case, and certainly isn't now. Not to mention that I have to make up for not defending her all those years ago. We never talked about that, not really, and that's something else we're going to have to do.

  Torn barely touches how I feel about it. Yesterday, it seemed as if all Maddie did was find ways to touch me and then Grant had to tell me I should throw caution to the wind. There's a lot on the line if I make this move, though.

  My friendship with Dave, my best friend since I was five.

  My current friendship with Maddie.

  If I lose either of those things, I don't just lose them, I lose their family as well. And I'm as close to them as I am my own parents. With so much at risk, I can guarantee that I'm not going to do anything that could possibly mess things up again. That is, if Maddie says yes.

  “LUCY?” THERE’S A girl who looks just like her laying in the grass, and if it wasn’t for her heaving chest, I’d think she was dead. The girl groans in acknowledgement, so I walk over and find that it is indeed Lucy. Her face is flushed, and she’s still breathing hard. I start laughing, earning myself a glare, but I can’t help it. She looks funny to me. Kneeling, I ask, “Everything okay?”

  “I’m dying,” she breathes.

  “Want mouth to mouth?” It slips out of my mouth without much thought. Lucy groans, but I notice her eyeing the bottle of water in my hand. “Here, let me save you.”

  I move over to her shoulders, set the bottle down, and lift her shoulders so she’s leaning against my chest with part of her back on my bent leg. Lucy rolls her head back onto my shoulder. I reach for the water, remove the cap, and hold it up. “Drink this,” I say softly.

  Lucy picks up her head and drinks like she’s been thirsty her entire life. She quickly gulps down all my water without pause. When she’s done, I remove the bottle from her lips and set it down next to us.

  “Thank you. Would it be too much to ask you to carry me to my dorm? I don’t think my legs work.” She’s looking at me now, her face so close. Too close. Lucy looks down and suddenly realizes her skin is slick with sweat. She must have really worked herself to be sweating. “Oh, I’m sweaty, Grant.” She tries to pull away, but I keep her where she is.

  “I don’t mind.” Without thinking, I plant a soft kiss on the crook of her neck, tasting the saltiness on my lips. “You like when I’m sweaty. Who’s to say I don’t like you the same way?”

  She laughs. “Not all the time. Sometimes, you really smell.” Lucy wrinkles that cute little nose of hers.

  “Whatever. What are you doing anyway?” I ask.

  “Trying to train for that stupid 5K run, duh. I don’t think I’ll make it. Maddie's going to be disappointed”

  “I’m surprised you haven’t asked her or your brothers to help you.”

  Her laugh is short and harsh. “I didn’t ask them because I wanted to do something on my own.” She pauses before adding, “Plus, they are mean trainers. Maddie is too, because I did run with her once.” She rests her head back on my shoulder.

  “So if I offered to help, you’d turn me down?” Lucy is always dragging me into helping her somehow. I never know that I even want to help until the words are already out of my mouth. And I have no freaking clue why I want to do this with her because running isn’t my favorite thing to do.

  “I’m probably too slow and you’ll end up waiting on me.”

  I laugh. “I’m a slow runner too. We wouldn’t have to be fast, Lucy. We only need to be able to finish.”

  “Well, well, well. What do we have here?” Patrick and Jonathan walk over to us.

  Lucy immediately sits up, but she’s still leaning against me a little. I wonder if she really is that worn out. Jonathan squints his eyes slightly in a glare. He rubs me the wrong way, and I think I do the same thing to him. Patrick, I can handle. Jonathan, I just want to tell him to go the fuck away. They both cross their arms over their chests and stare down at us when they finally reach us.

  “She was dying, and I saved her,” I explain.

  Their faces blanch, their eyes immediately scanning over her, looking for something. Lucy elbows me in the gut, but I don’t understand why.

  “He’s joking. I went for a run and I’m so not a runner.”

  “You okay, Luce?” Jonathan asks. There is more to his words, some heavier meaning, but I’m not sure what.

  Her shoulders sag as she nods. “Yeah, I’m fine. You two?”

  The conversation has shifted to a topic that I’m not aware of. The brothers nod.

  “Do you mind if I hang out with Grant tonight instead?” Instead? Instead of what? Why is she asking them for permission? She hasn’t even mentioned hanging out to me. I hate when they talk about something only they know about, purposely leaving me out in the cold unknowing. All it does is leave me confused and slightly worried. There is always too much weight to their carefully chosen words.

  The brothers glance at me. “Corey won’t be happy, Lucy,” Patrick sighs.

  “Well, he didn’t talk to me at all last week, so I don’t care.”

  Jonathan frowns. “But we’re always together. I’m sure he has a good reason.”

  “I don’t want to.” Her voice is quiet, and her head is down when she says it. I’m surprised they even heard her, but her reply pisses them off and worries them at the same time. What the hell is going on?

  “Luce-” Jonathan starts, but Patrick holds up his hand to stop him.

  “If she doesn’t want to, she doesn’t want to, Jon. Leave it alone.” He may be younger, but his authoritative, final tone shuts Jonathan up. Patrick bends, reaches out to lift her chin so she’ll look at him. “Are you sure?” Lucy nods. “Corey will want to see you no matter what, you know that.”

  “Tell him to meet me at 8 then. I might still be with Grant, though.”

  “What are-” Jonathan starts.

  “Shut up,” Patrick scolds over his shoulder. Jon throws his hands up, curses under his breath, and walks away. Patrick gives a sweet smile to Lucy. “I’ll handle them, don’t worry. Do whatever you feel you need to do, okay?”

  Lucy nods and reaches over to hug him tightly, which presses her breasts on either side of my knee. I probably shouldn't notice, but I do. “I always knew you were my favorite.”

  Patrick chuckles. “They may be older, but I’m the wisest when it comes to you. I love you, Luce.” He kisses her temple.

  “I love you too,” she whispers, her voice strained.

  Then he stands, waves goodbye, and walks over to a pacing Jonathan. I’m so lost, and I wait to see if she’s going to explain. She doesn’t.

  “So can I hang out with you tonight?” There’s a hint of laughter in her tone as she looks at me with hopeful eyes.

  I have to ask. There’s no ignoring it anymore. I want to know what they were talking about. “Lucy, what-”

  The hope disappears and is replaced with pleading as she interrupts me. “Please, don’t.”

  Two words. Two words said with so much desperation that I know immediately that I’ll do whatever she wants me to tonight. That’s all it takes. Still, I stare at for her a moment.

  “What do you want to do?” I finally say.

  “I want to be around you and not them, so anything else doesn’t really matter. Around only you,” she corrects. Her words mean something, something big. I’m just not sure what. It feels like she’s giving me a gift of sorts, but too many pieces are missing for me to put together what exactly. “Where do you go when you don’t want anyone to bother you?�
��

  “The library, but someone,” I give her a pointed look, “always finds me.” I grin and Lucy rewards me with a smile. “Where do you go?”

  She dismisses my question easily. “My brothers know all those places. Today, I don’t want them to be able to find me until I’m ready.”

  Ready for what? I want to ask so badly, but she’s asked me not to do so. “There’s a sports bar across town and a game will start in about an hour. Want to go there?”

  Lucy rests her head against my shoulder, her eyes closed. “No people, remember?”

  “No people at all? Even strangers?”

  “Especially not strangers,” she whispers.

  “Neil and Bo will be out for a while. Winston is hoarding Maddie in his room, but we can still go to my place.”

  “Perfect. I need to shower first though.” She looks down at herself and seems to remember that she was running.

  “Grab your things and shower there. Then you can ride with me.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I'M SO SORRY to do this to you, Neil,” Audra starts when I answer the phone.

  “What are you talking about?” I interrupt, parking at a fast food restaurant for lunch.

  “My appointment was rescheduled for this afternoon because the doctor has to make a trip out of town. I tried to get it on a different day when I knew you could come, but I wasn't able to do that. I know you wanted to go. I'm sorry.” She sounds near tears, and I hate hearing that.

  “What time is the appointment?”

  “At one thirty.” Shit, she's calling it close. “I know it's last minute, but I got busy at work this morning and couldn't call.”

  “I only had two morning classes and we don't have practice today, so I can come. Have you had lunch yet?”