by C Renee
“Lou, these flowers are for you!” She rushes over and hands me the red roses. I immediately grab the card that’s imbedded in the flowers. I really think she’s crazy. These can’t be for me, I never get flowers.
She takes in my expression of doubt and reassures me. “Seriously Lou, they are for you. I checked the card myself. I was a little disappointed they weren’t for me. You know me. I’m a sucker for flowers. I am telling you the truth, they are for you.”
I give her a look and I can tell she’s really excited for me, if only I can share her excitement.
The card reads:
‘I can’t wait to see you again Precious.’
What the hell is wrong with that man? I didn’t ask for flowers. I don’t think I want to see him again. Not after my meltdown the other night. Why would he give me flowers?
“Maybe you made a good impression and he really wants to see you again.” Steph answers with a smirk. I must have said all that out loud. Can the ground open up and suck me in hole?
“Ah, nope, you know flowers don’t do anything for me. Give me a gemstone and I’m all yours.”
Ever since I was a little girl, I collected gemstones, minerals and different rocks. Even to this day if I see special gems on display that catch my eye, like in a gemstone gallery or a jewelers, I will go in and either purchase the one I saw or buy a different one. I will not walk out empty handed. Sadly, my collection is still at my parent’s house and I miss seeing them everyday.
Remembering about my gemstones and my parents makes me sad. I still don’t have a way to contact them. I’m too scared to go visit them just in case the house is being watched. Not knowing where Matt is or where his boys are is making me paranoid. I hope I don’t see any of them ever again, and if I do, I know things will turn for the worst and I’m going to regret getting Steph involved.
“Hello, earth to Lou. Are you even listening to me?” She’s waving her manicured hand in front of my face. I have no idea how long she has been doing that for. I turn towards the files and busy my hands with sorting out them again.
“No, sorry, what were you saying?”
“Oh, just that Alex came into work today asking where you were and I told him you were home sick.” She smirks at me again. Soon enough I’m going to wipe that smirk off her face.
Oh god, I really hope she didn’t give Alex my number. Those missed phone calls can’t be from him. He’s starting to turn into a stalker with the phone calls, turning up at my work and sending those flowers. He needs to get a life and leave mine alone.
“What the hell Steph? Why would you even tell him that I’m home and let alone give him my number,” I ask her. I am so furious at her and at Alex.
I can’t sit still so I get up and stand. I start twitching with anger and I start pacing the living room. I haven’t been this scared and nervous since the first time Matt hit me.
“Sorry, he is hot and he wants to take you out on another date. I thought it was a good idea and girl you need it. He’s exactly what the doctor ordered. Now before you get your panties in a twist, just go out with him again and if the second date is horrible then I will apologize, but you know I’m right.” She walks past me but stops just behind me to slap my ass. Oh she has the nerve.
I can’t believe she has done that. I don’t want to see Alex again. I’m more than happy to continue my life without seeing him, but I know this Friday is going to be the death of me, especially at this meeting. So in the meantime I just have to block him out and focus on my career because that’s the only thing that will stay around years later when I get fat, old and ugly.
****
I wake up and it’s Friday morning, I am full of jitters and dread. I haven’t answered any of Alex’s calls or texts and I know I have to face him today. I have to finally talk to him and apologize for my weird and bad behavior the other night, but I can’t even form the sentences that I will say to him. I really hope he doesn’t show up today.
I’m fresh from the shower and I look at myself in the floor length mirror on the back of my bathroom door. I am very pleased with the outfit I have picked out today. The skirt is long enough that reaches my knees with a slit at the back of it. I’m wearing a red blouse with frills running down the middle of the buttons in the front and my black suit jacket. I walk towards my closet and get my red high heels to wear today. These are my favorite shoes and I suppose you could say my lucky ladies.
Steph is all ready to head into work when I spot her in the kitchen.
“You look lovely this morning Lou. I know you are going to kick ass in this meeting today. Just remember, you are running the show and no one can take that from you.” She walks over and gives me a quick hug before releasing me and taking my hand. We walk together to the front door and I get ready to kick ass today.
The office is quite yet busy as I walk up to Nick’s office to let him know I’m in today.
“Oh, hey baby,” he greets me at his office door. I love how Nick greets me this way, he is always a breath of fresh air, and he is easy going and so down to earth. I wouldn’t change a thing about him, except to be less gay.
“Oh hey girlfriend,” I greet him back. He is such a loveable guy.
“I know you have this meeting today but I always know you’re going to kick ass.” He walks over to me and gives me an air kiss on the cheek.
“Thanks, but now that I’m here, I feel less confident then I should.” I return his kiss.
“Don’t Sweet Pea, you look hot and you have brains, now go use them. We are still on for lunch, so don’t run over time.” He pushes me out his office and watches me walk to mine.
My office is my safe haven right now, so I take a deep breath and continue to smash out today’s tasks. I dump my handbag and my suit jacket on my desk and fish out the files from my briefcase that I brought in yesterday. I have worked so hard on these files this week. I hope I don’t mess up today. Landing these accounts for this company would be amazing. I know I haven’t worked here for long but if this meeting goes as planned I won’t be that new girl anymore. I will be a well-known finance accountant.
I walk into the boardroom and all 20 people around the large meeting table stop their conversations and look up at me. If I was nervous before, this is nothing to what I feel now. I scan the room hoping my eyes land on Alex, but they don’t. He isn’t here and I let out the breath I wasn’t aware I was holding. I inhale and exhale two more breaths before I take my seat next to Steph. She gives me a curious once over and resumes her conversation with Andrew, our CEO.
Throughout the meeting I couldn’t stop wondering why Alex didn’t show and if the reason he didn’t show was in fact me. When it was my turn to present what I had been preparing all week. I can’t help but feel my throat thicken and sweat starts to form on my forehead and my palms. I wipe them on my skirt and look around the room once more before I start. I can’t stop my thoughts from wondering to Alex. I look towards Steph and she gives me the thumbs up.
As I gave my presentation, I felt like I was a robot on autopilot, going through the slides and notes I had planned out. Once I finished my speech, I look around the room and everyone was applauding me. I guess it was a job well done then.
I head back to my seat and Steph leans in. “That was brilliant Lou. I knew you had it in you,” she whispers before she leans back towards the head of the table where the negotiations begin take place.
Later that afternoon, I heard a knock on my door and Andrew walks into my office. He only visits when he either has really good news or really bad news. Let’s hope for my sake its good news.
“Hello Miss Louise. You did a fantastic job with your presentation this week and in saying that, I would like to congratulate you on landing all four companies today. The CEO’s were very impressed and we just finalized the contracts. I couldn’t have done it without you Louise, and this means these companies will be working very closely with you and other team members.” He looks at me again and heads towards the door.
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I’m shocked. I can’t believe that my efforts today have landed us the four biggest companies in America. The main one is the CEO of all charities. They finalize all the accounts and funds for every charity known to man. This is big deal and of course it’s Knight Enterprises.
I hear another knock on my office door while I’m drinking a strong black coffee when Steph walks in. “Hey girl, congratulations on the big deals today! This calls for drinks tonight to celebrate. I am so proud of you.” She walks over and hugs me so tight. Can this day get any better?
“Yeah, sure thing, that sounds great, but Steph, no guys tonight please. Not after what happened with that lame excuse of a date I went on the other day,” I plead with her, my puppy dogs eyes come into force so she wont be able to say no.
“Okay fine, girls’ night and girls only, but please, no lesbian action. I don’t do that.” I smile at her when she leaves my office.
I’m actually looking forward to tonight now. Let’s get this girl wasted.
Chapter Ten
Alex
I’M SITTING IN REECE’S apartment, waiting for him to get ready because we are going out tonight. Our plans are to seduce some ladies. I need a new lay, after the week I’ve just had. I don’t understand what went wrong with the first date I had with Louise. It seemed to go just fine until she ran out of there like she had seen a ghost. I didn’t want to ask her about it because I’ve seen that look before, on myself, about five years ago.
I smiled over at Tiffany. We were in the car on our way to take that small weekend getaway we had planned before finals really hit us. It was to give us a break from studying so hard. She needed it more than anyone else. She really wanted to be a Lawyer and open her own firm. She could manipulate me very well and I was sure she would do great.
I took her to this abandoned forest retreat where there isn’t any phone service. It was only us and nature. She loved it. I looked over towards her and saw the wind blowing her golden hair in her face, as she rolled the window down to get the smell of fresh nature air in the car. She looked beautiful, laughing and being carefree. That was the image I will hold onto forever.
She moved her hair out of her face and the light caught her engagement ring. As the sunlight caught the ring on the right angle, I saw it sparkle and Tiffany’s eyes lit up with excitement. It gave me so much joy. This incredible woman was mine forever, and after all the unexpected twists and turns that life had given us we were still together, fighting to keep our bond stronger.
“Alex, I can’t wait to see this lodge you are taking us to.” She put her left hand on her belly. She looked over at me and smiled. That was the moment that everything changed forever.
I could hear everything before I could see what had happened on the road ahead of me. There were cars screeching along the narrow road. The impact of the accident caused horns to go off; there were loud bangs, metal clashing against metal, and people screaming in their cars. The road ahead was a mess, fire bursting from the front of the cars, tires rolling around the road, a truck flipped on its side, and a car broken in half. I slammed on the brakes, but I was too late.
The last thing I remembered was going head first into the side of a log truck flipped on its side. I saw the flames rise above the trucks’ engine and spread right through the crash site. I heard so many screams and people crying.
Then everything went black.
The next thing I knew, I had woken up in the hospital… All I kept thinking was what the hell happened?
The doctor entered my room when the nurse alerted him that I was awake. “Hello Alex, it’s good to finally meet you. Since you were in and out of consciousness for three weeks I didn’t get a chance to speak to you until now. Do you know where you are?” He asked me while he shone a light in my eyes.
“Ah yes, I think so.” I croaked. The nurse gave me a glass of water. I felt the cold water run down my throat, soothing the dryness.
“I’m afraid I do have some good and bad news regarding the accident you had.” He looked down at his notes on the clipboard and told me I had a broken right shoulder blade, broken right arm, my left leg was in a cast from my pelvis bone to my toes. I tried to remember what happened in the accident but I can’t seem to think that far back. My mind was so groggy and unclear from the amount of painkillers I have taken. I started to remember the road trip, and how Tiffany looked amazing, and then everything came crashing down. Where was Tiffany?
“Where’s Tiffany? Is she okay? My fiancé,” I shouted. I was going into a panic mode, fighting with the tubes in my arms. I had to get out of this bed and find her but I know I can’t go anywhere until I had the answers I wanted.
“Easy there tiger, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. The accident was horrific. The truck that you crashed into left your car a total mess. The fireman had to get the Jaws of Life to cut you out, but unfortunately, the truck driver didn’t make it. Your car was pushed up into the side.
“Your injuries were grave, you are lucky to be alive except for some extensive broken bones, but they will mend. Now for the bad news, I am sorry to have to tell you this but Tiffany didn’t make it. On the way back to the hospital we lost Tiffany twice. We took her straight to the OR to try to stop the internal bleeding. She was in surgery for five hours. Unfortunately we lost her. She had lost a lot of blood and we couldn’t stop the bleeding. She did put up a good fight but the fight was too strong, I’m so sorry. Her family has been here to say goodbye to her and they left shortly after. Your family has been in and out to see you, but since it’s the middle of the night, they aren’t here right now but I’m sure they will be back later in the morning.” The doctor looked like he was going to be sick. I felt bad for the guy; he had to deliver horrible news. I tuned out from listening to him talk about the road to recovery. I can’t stop thinking about Tiffany. Why wasn’t I awake to help her?
Why couldn’t I stop in time to see the truck roll on its side?
Why?
Why?
Why?
That whole accident was my entirely fault. Tiff was gone and I was the only one to blame.
What do I do now?
Next fall we were meant to get married.
This can’t be happening.
The machines in the room started beeping louder, my heart rate was increasing and I started to shake. This was entirely my fault.
The nurse rushed into the room and gave me a sedative to calm me down, and I started to drift off. I dreamt of Tiff and her beautiful smile.
In the months after the car accident, that claimed my Tiffany, I started physical therapy to get back on my feet. Living without Tiff had been horrendous, but the first few weeks straight after her death I couldn’t get off my fat ass, I wouldn’t leave the house. I just wanted to wallow away to nothing. Life hasn’t been the same without her. I had gone into depression and drinking my sorrows away.
My father gave me a backhand of verbal advice. He snapped me out of my self-pity party, and he told me to stop feeling sorry for myself. He told me that one day he wanted one of his sons to take over his business and become that CEO everyone would fear and would never cross. He gave me this entire speech on how to not waste my future away. That’s when it hit me square in the face.
I knew then what I wanted to do with my life. I got back into shape and I changed majors in college to suit my future. My best friend, Reece, was there the whole time, to pick up all the pieces. He was present when I changed my whole life around. He was truly the best friend I could ask for.
As soon as everything was going good again, considering what had happened, I would see her. Tiff would pop up out of the blue, smiling that amazing smile of hers. She would give me words of encouragement and telling me how proud she was of me.
My face whitened, I had just seen a ghost.
“Hey man, you ready?” Reece waves a hand in front of my face, jeez how long has he been doing that for?
“Yeah man, I was just deep in my thoughts and shit, try
ing to come up with foolproof pick-up lines for tonight. Let’s get going.”
We walk towards the door and I swear I see Tiff standing there laughing at me. I shake my head and follow Reece out to his car.
I need a drink, or ten.
La Crush is a little crowded tonight but that doesn’t stop us from getting a booth at the back. We signal the waitress to start serving us drinks and a bowl of chips. Fuck I’m hungry and I’m not sure if it’s for food or for pussy.
I scan the growing crowd to see if there are any potential women that I could take home tonight and sink myself into. I don’t see many choices because they all seem familiar.
I lean across the table and get Reece’s attention.
“Hey man, how many women have I been with from here because they all look familiar? Please tell me they aren’t here to band together to cut my dick off?” I look him dead in the eyes. He’s trying so hard to hold in his laugh but he fails. Reece belts out a rough laugh.
Great, he’s laughing at my expense now. He isn’t any better than I am. I know he tries to not get sloppy seconds or vice versa, but the women here seem to be limited in this lame ass town. How can I go through so many women in such a short amount of time? It makes me wonder if I will ever find the one. I think I need a vacation, and a beautiful woman to sink myself into sounds fan-fucking-tastic.
