Compulsion: Magnetic Desires

by Misti Murphy

  Luscious curves, and the sway of her hips, had me wishing I’d lost the first wager instead of the second. Doing her on the hood of my truck was appealing, especially when I noticed the parking lot was deserted. Patience, you’ll get what you want. I opened the door for her and stared at her ass as she climbed in. I’d be holding onto that while I fucked her before the night was through.

  On the way home, she turned the stereo up and sang along to the radio. She had a voice and the lungs to belt out Bon Jovi with confidence, and I joined her in the chorus. This was the kind of girl I should be looking for something serious with. I’d have to pull out all my tricks and see if I could get her to stick around for more than one performance.

  Opening the door, I held it open for her. "What do you want to drink? I’ve got beer, scotch, or bourbon."

  "Scotch." She shucked her heels at the door, and followed me into the kitchen. "Then you’re going to tell me your story."

  I poured out double measures of scotch. "Coke?"

  She drained the glass. "Neat."

  "You don’t want my story." I pulled her into my arms and swayed to the music still playing in my head. "You want to go to bed with me."

  "I want everything, including another glass of scotch." She pushed me away and poured another double.

  I picked up my glass and slammed the shot down before getting a refill. "Okay then, I better start at the beginning."

  ***

  The smell of bacon invaded my nostrils, and my stomach turned. Opening one eye, I glanced around and clutched my head to keep it from splitting open. I remembered leaving the pub with that girl I’d played pool with. Couldn’t quite drag her name to the surface. Kelly, maybe, or Miley. Mmmmm, I rolled it around my mouth until her name came to me, Mellie. Everything past that point was a blank. I crawled out of bed and went to the bathroom. It stank of bleach, and I heaved over the porcelain. Oh God, if I was this sick, how bad had I been last night?

  Yet she’d stuck around? Had I even been able to perform? I couldn't have been much fun, if at all. Getting into the shower, I twisted the tap and let the sting of the cold water blast the last dregs of sleep away. It helped, but it would take more to get rid of the hangover.

  Finding a clean T-shirt and jeans, I dressed and made my way to the kitchen. Mellie had made herself at home, wearing nothing but one of my T-shirts. She was singing as she flipped the bacon. "Are you hungry?"

  "Mellie, isn’t it?" I grabbed water from the fridge before reaching for the bottle of painkillers.

  She chuckled. "You had too much scotch. Still feeling like shit?"

  Last night she’d matched me drink for drink, and yet here she was, vivacious and with not a hint of the hangover that was killing me. "Sorry about last night."

  She slid breakfast onto plates. "Don’t worry about it. Confession is good for the soul."

  "But, that wasn’t why you came home with me. I have to assume I wasn’t... a great ride."

  "Never mind, come eat. It’ll help with the hangover."

  We settled at the counter and she wolfed down her food, while I mangled an egg, the yolk pouring onto the bacon. If I put it in my mouth, I’d gag. I had to be the worst one-night-stand she’d had.

  "You were still up for it last night, after you told me everything?"

  I put my fork down. "Everything?"

  "Your entire life story." She eased off the stool and fixed coffee. "I’m not what you need. At least not like that."

  "Then why did you stick around?"

  "Because." She pushed coffee into my hand. "You need a friend."

  I had friends, but not like her, not ones I could confide in. "So we’re friends?"

  She nodded, her impish smile dancing over the rim of her cup. The sound of banging on the front door put a halt to our conversation, and I went to find Mike standing outside.

  "Have a big night last night?"

  "Do you need to ask?" I shuffled back toward the kitchen, him following behind, a pile of papers under his arm.

  "Do you have company? Should I come back later?"

  "Yes and no. Mike, this is Mellie. She was nice enough to take care of my drunken ass."

  Mellie was still wearing my shirt, and he ran his gaze over her several times as though he was committing her to memory before clearing his throat. "Hello."

  "Hi." She dumped her cup in the sink and headed out of the kitchen. "I’m going to go take a shower, Orion, if that’s cool?"

  "Help yourself." The coffeepot was still hot and I refilled my cup, getting one for Mike as well.

  Mike’s entire body swiveled in her direction as she left the room. "That’s your company?"

  "Yeah, but nothing happened."

  "Nothing.” He gaped. "You didn’t..."

  This was new. I’d never seen Mike react like this. "We didn’t."

  "But she’s...wow. You’re serious?"

  I clapped him on the shoulder and handed him a cup. "Mellie and I are friends. I’m pretty sure that’s how it’s meant to be. If you want to take a shot at her, then go ahead."

  "Maybe I will."

  We settled around the kitchen table and he placed the paperwork in front of me. "I’ve got your contracts for the two acre block, and I’ve been through them. All you have to do is sign at the tabs and the land is yours."

  Both of us grinning like fools, I took the pen he offered and started signing page after page.

  "Can you call me a cab?" Mellie entered the kitchen wearing last night's dress as I set the pen down.

  "Don’t worry about it." Mike jumped from his seat. I was leaving myself. I can give you a ride home."

  "Thanks, that would be great."

  I was sure Mike hadn’t been planning on leaving. I’d never seen him show this much interest in a female. The way he was taking to her surprised me. She was one hell of a woman, and I wished him luck.

  Chapter Twelve

  "I lasted five days and three hours before I gave in and called Clo. It hadn’t been a matter of whether I would, but of how long I could hold out before I gave in to my desire to see her. Being around her was both euphoric and crippling."

  June 2009

  "Hey, glad you could make it." Clo reached up on tiptoe to kiss my cheek.

  I offered her the bottle of wine I brought.

  "Zack’s running late from work, but he’ll be home in a minute." She took the wine into the kitchen, and I followed her. The aroma of garlic, onion, and tomatoes made my mouth water.

  "Still a good cook, I see."

  "Actually, I’m doing catering."

  "Really? What about Chemistry?" I drummed my fingers on the bench.

  "Food is Chemistry," she said, "or at least science with love."

  Chemistry, love, and food. It would be so easy for me to set her on the counter and drizzle chocolate syrup over her bare skin. I’d show her the true meaning of her words. Unable to meet her gaze, I picked up a teaspoon from the strainer beside the sink and tasted the sauce simmering on the range. "If this is science with love, I wish I’d studied harder."

  "But you’re doing okay?" Linking her arm through mine, she bumped against my side. The connection between us was still there, but different after our time apart.

  "Yeah, of course, work’s great."

  Catching her gaze while I tried to make her believe my life without her had been perfect, was a mistake. It was almost impossible to break away. In fact, when she darted that pink tongue of hers over parted lips, I drew closer, unable to escape her gravity and brainlessly hell bent on kissing her. The bang of the front door startled her, making her jump and let go of my arm. Shoving a hand through my hair, I aimed to appear relaxed as Zack barged into the kitchen.

  "Hey babe." He dumped his briefcase beside the kitchen door before dipping Clo into a lingering kiss. An image of his pale ass took center place in my mind, making me want to hurl, so I turned my back on them and stirred the sauce. There was no way I wanted to watch the bastard put on a show to remind me he loved her.<
br />
  It didn’t matter. I wasn’t going to say anything. It was water under the bridge, and besides, after tonight I wouldn’t be seeing them. Not if I could help it, anyway.

  "Dinner’s almost ready," Clo said when they came up for air. "Why don’t you get Orion a beer?"

  Zack took beers from the fridge, and Clo came to stand beside me while I swirled the sauce around the pan.

  "I think it’s ready." She elbowed me in the ribs. "Why don’t you boys go talk, while I get this food served up?"

  Taking the beer Zack offered, I followed him into the dining room where we took seats at the table. Beer in hand I stared at the table, hoping we could get away with speaking very little if at all. In truth, if I never had to speak to him again, I would have been content. It seemed he felt the same way, as he drank his beer without saying a word.

  ***

  "You should come see Clo more often," Zack said over dinner. "She’s been missing you. I work too much and she needs a friend."

  Oh, she missed me. I didn’t know how that was supposed to help. All she had to do was crook her little finger and I was chasing after her like a puppy, and if Zack wasn’t there, I could deal with being around her. You’re a douche, Orion. When are you going to get it through your thick skull she’s never going to want you?

  "I’m busy with the business." I scratched the back of my neck. "I wish I could."

  When she went into the kitchen I thought the subject was dropped.

  "Come on, Orion, she misses you. She hasn’t got any friends here. You’d be doing me a favor."

  What the hell was he thinking? The way he was leaning on the table and caressing the damn beer bottle in his hand had me wondering what he would get out of having me around more. It sure wasn’t about what she’d get out of it. Either he was a fool, or he was still getting up to his old tricks, because any man who was willing to let a girl like Clo hang out with a guy like me couldn’t be thinking about his relationship. "If you’re sure?"

  "Great," Zack replied, relaxing back in his chair, a grin splitting his face.

  Clo slipped through the doors carrying a giant red velvet cupcake, and Zack jumped up to take it from her, landing a gentle swat on her ass. Putting the cake down on the table, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her again.

  One minute he was pushing her and I together, the next, he was showing me how much she’d never be mine. Unable to stomach more of his showmanship, or the cake, I stood up from the table. "Sorry guys, dinner’s been fun, but I have to go. I’m supposed to meet Mike to go over the quarterly figures."

  "I’ll walk you out." Clo followed me onto the porch. "I really do miss you."

  "I miss you too." I made it down the concrete steps before turning around. It was, perhaps, the first honest thing I’d said all night. "I’ll try not to be a stranger."

  Chapter Thirteen

  "Our friendship was as it had been before, and I found myself unable to deny her what she wanted. Zack hadn’t been lying when he said he worked long hours, or at least, about not being home much, which gave us ample time to spend together.

  To me she was oxygen, and I guess I couldn’t see past that to realize how bad we were for each other." Orion’s silent for a minute before he starts again.

  "I got a phone call. She was upset, and I thought she’d broken up with Zack. My first thought was that I could make her mine. My second was that my favorite girl was upset and she needed me, so I drove to her house, determined to be everything she needed. That terrible day was the beginning of the end of our friendship as we knew it."

  September 2009

  Sitting on the couch, I held her against me while she dug into a tub of ice cream with a teaspoon. "So the doctor said I have Pelvic Inflammatory Disease." Another mouthful of ice cream, and a tear slipped down her cheek. "Basically, I’ve had an infection for a while now, and it’s caused inflammation and scarring in my tubes."

  "Shit, Clo. Did they have any idea how it happened?" I tightened my hold on her.

  She sagged into my side, her head on my shoulder. "They said it was most likely a bacteria, and it's been going on for a while now. My tubes are..." Her shoulders shuddered, her voice cracking, "I’m not going to be able to have kids."

  Tucking her head under my chin, I breathed in the soft vanilla of her shampoo. "I’m so sorry, Clo. You would have been an amazing mom."

  "I wanted that, to be a mom. We’d talked about it. I’d dreamed about the kids we’d have." She shuddered and brushed her hand over her eyes.

  "It’s going to be okay. There are other ways..." Unsure if there was anything I could say that wouldn’t be wrong in this situation, I trailed off. All I wanted to do was take this heartbreak from her. Seeing her hurting like this hurt me, though I couldn’t imagine wanting kids myself. Not as long as the only person I loved enough to commit to a lifetime with was the one girl I couldn’t have.

  "You know, it’s not the fact I can’t that gets to me. It’s the fact I have to tell Zack I’m defective. What if... he doesn’t want me anymore? What if he leaves me for someone who can give him what he wants?"

  I cupped her cheek to gaze into her eyes. Zack doesn’t deserve you. Never has. "You are perfect as you are, Clo. If Zack doesn’t see that, then he’s a fool who doesn’t deserve one minute of the years you’ve given him." If I were him, I would appreciate every minute, every tiny second you gave me, and it wouldn’t matter that you can’t have kids as long as I had you.

  She bit her lip, and the way she peered at me through those lashes of hers. Goddamn, it took all my control not to show her she’d be better off without him. The way her hip shifted against mine when she turned into me, her hand clutching at my chest, made me freeze. All it would take was the tilt of my lips to hers to set off a chain reaction that wouldn’t end until she was beneath me.

  "You always know how to make things better. Why didn’t I fall in love with you?"

  That was a good fucking question. One I’d never worked out the answer to. I’d never forgotten her taste, or the way that sweet mouth of hers had clung to mine while she explored my body. Don’t fucking complicate it.

  An inch maybe, it wasn’t much, between me and my addiction. Too late, I pulled back, but she was already chest-to-chest with me, her lips pressed against mine. I circled her waist with my hands, undecided. It would be so easy to have her. A groan reverberated through my chest when she wound her arms around my neck and pressed closer. Fuck Zack, she was supposed to be mine.

  But it wasn’t about me. She wasn’t kissing me because she wanted me. My own needs couldn’t cloud my mind enough to make me forget that her pain was keeping her from thinking straight, and if I did this, if I let it happen between us, she would regret it. With shaky hands, I pushed her away. You fucking pussy, Orion, have at her. Make her scream your name. Make her realize she belongs with you. "Don’t do this."

  "I need you." She clung to me, her tits pressed against my chest, and I itched to touch her, to run my hands all over her body.

  Instead, I pushed her away. "No, don’t, Clo. You don’t mean this."

  "Orion, please."

  Anything you want, babe. You want me to bend you over the couch? Just say the word. I’ve been waiting for you for a long time. If she were smart, she wouldn’t say anything.

  "I want you." She did for the moment, but it wasn’t enough.

  Pushing her from my lap, I leapt from the couch, accidentally sending her to the floor. "You mean everything to me, Clo." Hands curled into fists, I rubbed at the ache in my chest. "But, don’t fucking ask me to make an ass of myself because your boyfriend is a douche bag. He should have been here, not me."

  He was supposed to love her, but fuck if I could see it. "You mean too much for me to let you ruin us for a bit of comfort."

  Wide eyed and pale, she hugged her arms around her knees, tears streaming down her face, and all I wanted to do was scoop her up and take her home with me where she belonged. I couldn’t trust myself not to, so I put dis
tance between us. Both of us would regret this moment for different reasons, if I didn’t leave now. "I’ve got to go."

  "I’m sorry." Leaving a part of myself behind, I opened the door. This friendship of ours, it was irreparably broken because I could never just see her as my friend. I couldn’t keep being the guy she turned to when shit went wrong.

  "I know." Palm to the wall, I hesitated. Not sure how to finish this without hurting her more. "Maybe it’s time we stopped pretending this friendship still works."

  "Please don’t say that." She sobbed harder, the sound becoming muffled as I turned to find her burying her face in a cushion. "I don’t want to lose you."

  "Damn it." I slammed my hand against the door and trod back over to her. My words left a bitter taste in my mouth. Squatting in front of her, I tugged down the soggy pillow. "Please don’t cry. I didn’t mean it."

  "You did," she said, "and I don’t blame you."

  I had, but she had to know I could never stay away. Did she understand how much power she held over me? "I love you, babe. I’m not going anywhere."

  "I love you, too," she said, her voice cracking as she gazed at me. If I’d taken advantage of the situation, if I’d pushed her, would she realize that what she felt when she said those words, was more than friendship?

  "Call Zack, and let me know how it goes." Half numb, I left her there on the floor. How could I stay, when all I wanted to do was show her what it would be like to be loved by a real man?

  Chapter Fourteen

  "It was a while before we were comfortable around each other. We both regretted that night, for different reasons. In hindsight, that was the moment I should have told her, should have held her and shown her what she needed was me. She kept her distance, and the quiet between us spoke of her regret." Orion does up the buttons on the cuffs of his shirt.

  He reaches out of camera view for a silk tie and begins the process of knotting it. "It was awkward. We didn’t talk the way we used to. I would catch her reaching out to touch me and snatching her hand away. It was hard to lose that part of our friendship. The ease of it, but neither of us could let go."