Rodeo Regrets

by Shannon Taylor Vannatter

“I’m organizing and giving the businesses advice this week. I’ve got two weeks to work up a proposal. I’ll be ready by then.”

  “Good. I know you’ll do great. You always have the cutest ideas.” Mama sipped her sweet tea. “Did you see anyone you know?”

  “A few people.” She hugged herself. The subject of Lane was off-limits. “How long has Wyatt been married?”

  “A few months.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “You never want to talk about Hannah, so, I didn’t mention it.” Mama touched her arm. “Listen, sweetie. He’s bringing Hannah over tomorrow night for a visit while he’s gone to the rodeo. I thought you should know. We could talk to Wyatt. I hoped you might—”

  “I already saw her.” Twice. “Wyatt’s wife came into Caitlyn’s store while I was there today. She had Hannah.”

  “Oh, sweetie.” Mama patted her arm. “You’re missing out on so much. She’s growing up so—”

  “Wyatt won’t let me near her. I don’t want to talk about it.” Especially not about the argument tonight.

  “I think we could talk to him. When you’re ready.” Mama hugged her again. “If you want to come over for lunch tomorrow, Mary always has our meal ready at noon. Your father will be home and I thought it might be a good opportunity for y’all to talk.”

  Talk? When she hadn’t seen Daddy since she’d told him she was pregnant? Since he’d blasted her for soiling the blue-blood family name? “Thanks. But I’ve got a lot to do.”

  “Eventually, one of you will have to make the first move.” Mama patted her arm and left.

  The door shut. The house was too big. Too empty.

  She was surrounded by luxury. By a mother and sister who still loved her, despite the things she’d done. Yet, she was still totally alone.

  Natalie sank into the couch and drew her knees up until she was in a tight ball.

  * * *

  Lane raised his fist to knock, but the frosted-glass-paneled door swung open.

  Natalie in red. Very little red. Cleavage and thigh with a scrap of dress in between. Bare, tanned, mile-long legs and stiletto heels to match the clingy dress. Lord, what would happen if she sat down? He couldn’t take her anywhere in that.

  Eyes, focus on her face. Red lipstick. Her hair a glossy, almost black curtain. Full lips that begged for his kiss. Curves that beckoned his arms. Absolutely gorgeous. And she’d be even prettier if the dress left more to the imagination. How could he get her to change?

  He cleared his throat. “Are you ready?”

  “Yes.”

  “You sure you’ll be comfortable at the rodeo?”

  “It’s part of my job, and I’ll have to get used to seeing Wyatt. Even though he’s not the problem.”

  “In that?”

  “What’s wrong?” She struck a come-hither pose. “Does it offend your Christian sensibilities? Will you be embarrassed to be seen with me?”

  He had to get her to change without insulting her, but he wouldn’t get anywhere by preaching to her. “I’m afraid some guy might look at you wrong and I might bust him in the nose, which could get me fired. And besides, since you’re working on publicity, don’t you think you should dress a bit more professionally?”

  She huffed out a sigh, rolled her eyes and disappeared down the hallway.

  “Whew.” The heaviness seeped out of his chest. Lord, help.

  * * *

  Every male head turned in their direction as Lane escorted Natalie around the arena. His fist tightened at his side. Yes, she’d changed into jeans and a hot-pink Western shirt. But her feminine allure was still firmly in place. Couldn’t these guys see how she was hurting? How she only needed someone to really love her and introduce her to Jesus?

  Lord, why did You have to make her so pretty? So soft? So curvy?

  Her red fingernails rested on his biceps. Intoxicating perfume filled his senses. Lord, help.

  “Not too close to Wyatt’s box seats.” She stopped.

  “I’m sorry. I should have taken you to the other side of the arena.”

  “This is fine.”

  He glanced toward where Wyatt and Star had been last night. They were there with Lacie and her new husband, Quinn, along with another brunette.

  The brunette waved. She looked familiar. “You know her?”

  “Unfortunately.”

  The brunette stood.

  “Great—I think she’s coming over.” Sarcasm tinged Natalie’s tone.

  “You don’t like her.”

  “No. But you would. She’s a Holy Roller, too.”

  He sighed. “Since she’s a Christian lady, I bet she’d make a great friend for you. Give her a chance.”

  “Hey, Lane.” The brunette stuck her hand toward him. “Kendra Wright. We met at church last week. Plus I saw you at Quinn and Lacie’s wedding.”

  “Your husband is Stetson, the bullfighter.” He clasped her hand. “He’s a great guy.”

  “That’s my guy.” Kendra smiled. “Hey, Natalie, mind if I sit with you?”

  “I’d love it.” Natalie’s smile smacked of fakeness.

  “I better get my horse in gear.” He turned to Natalie. “See you in a few.”

  She stepped close, her body firmly pressed against his. Her arms wound around his neck and she tipped her head back.

  “Cut it out,” he whispered, putting as much space between them as he could. “Is this about Wyatt?”

  Her eyes went wide. “Of course.”

  “I thought he didn’t matter.”

  “No, but it never hurts to make a guy jealous.” Her lips beckoned. So soft and yielding.

  Could he kiss her into loving him? Stupid. But he was almost willing to try. Especially with the reward of her kiss hanging in the balance. He’d surely drown. He had to win her heart for Jesus before he could win her heart for himself.

  “Sorry, I can’t help you out on that one.” He unwound her arms from his neck and kissed the back of her hand. “See you after the rodeo.”

  The noodles he called legs still worked—by some miracle—and he strode toward the gate to saddle his horse. Natalie Wentworth still knocked him for a loop. Even after all these years.

  Heart pounding like a jackhammer, he fumbled with the blanket and heaved the saddle on his horse’s back. The big dun stood still and steady, swishing her black tail in anticipation while he tightened the girth around her sand-colored middle.

  “I guess you and Natalie took up right where you left off in high school.” Clay Warren’s tone was taut.

  Lane turned.

  Clay’s jaw tensed.

  They’d been friends in school until Lane got into womanizing. Until that look of disapproval severed their friendship. “It’s not like that.”

  “That was some hug.”

  “I ran into her here last night and asked her to dinner tonight.” He adjusted his hat. “Remember, I’m a Christian now and I told her that. You should have seen the scrap of red dress she wanted to wear. I think she’s trying to make Wyatt jealous.”

  “From where I sit, you didn’t run.”

  He shrugged. “I figure I owed her. I used her once. She used me tonight.” His heart squeezed.

  “Are you sure that’s all?”

  Lane’s gaze dropped to the dirt. “I love her.”

  “Lane Gray in love?” Clay’s brows lifted. “With one woman?”

  He nodded. “I think it happened back in high school. That’s why I broke up with her. It scared me to death.”

  “You hurt her bad.”

  “Not according to her.” Lane winced. “And then it seemed like she fell for you.”

  “She was just trying to make you jealous. And when I resisted, I became a game to her.”


  Just like tonight. She’d tried to use Clay all those years ago—to make Lane jealous. “She’s been around the arena a few times?”

  “You could put it that way.”

  “Because of what I did to her, you think?”

  “You were a kid.” Clay clapped him on the back. “And she made her own choices.”

  “Well, none of that matters. I love her.”

  “Kendra is a friend of Rayna’s.” Clay stroked the horse’s jaw. “They’ve been praying for Natalie, but so far nothing’s changed with her.”

  “I have to get through to her.” A deep ache throbbed in his chest.

  “Just don’t let that scrap of a red dress get through to you.” Clay grinned.

  The mere thought of the red dress twisted his insides. “Pray for me.”

  Clay adjusted his cowboy hat. “Will do.”

  “What are you doing here, anyway? Didn’t you retire a few years back?”

  “I did. But I come once in a while to cheer the guys on.”

  “Where’s Rayna?”

  “She’s terrified of bulls.”

  “Makes more sense than being afraid of dogs.”

  “Huh?” Clay frowned.

  “Nothing. You know Rayna invited me to supper next weekend. Think she might invite Natalie, too?”

  “I’m on it.” Clay clapped him on the back again. “She’s always said Natalie just needs Jesus and a good man.”

  He’d like to be that man.

  * * *

  Natalie rolled her eyes as Kendra took the seat beside her. “Why are you sitting with me?”

  “I thought we might get to know each other better.” Kendra smiled.

  “Why? Aren’t your friends over there?” Natalie glanced at Kendra’s usual sidekicks—the ladies who avoided the Natalies of the world. Though Kendra’s past aligned more with Natalie’s, she’d never seemed interested in striking up a friendship before.

  “To be honest, I’m not comfortable around Lacie’s sister.”

  “Star is Lacie’s sister? Why don’t you like her?”

  “No, I like her. She’s very sweet. But since Wyatt and I have a history, I’m not sure she likes me.”

  Natalie elbowed her. “I guess we could start a club.”

  “Wyatt’s exes.” Kendra laughed.

  “Something catchier than that.”

  “If we’d only dated, it would be one thing. But we weren’t Christians then.” Kendra hung her head. “And...I’m not sure how Star feels about our former relationship.”

  “Are they happy?”

  “Very.”

  “I didn’t know he married. Or that she adopted...” Natalie’s voice cracked.

  “She loves Hannah as if she were her own.” Sincerity shone in Kendra’s gaze.

  Natalie’s chin wobbled. “I’m glad. Really.” She bit her lip, then rolled her eyes. “I guess she’s a Christian, since Wyatt’s on this Jesus kick.”

  “It’s not a Jesus kick. It’s a permanent change he’s made, and, yes, Star is a Christian.” Kendra laid a hand on her arm. “How do you feel about Hannah?”

  Fire swept through her veins and she shook Kendra’s hand off. “Did they send you over here to find out if I’m planning to cause them problems?”

  “No. Nothing like that.”

  “Then why are you talking to me? You’ve never bothered before.”

  “And I’m sorry about that. When you were dating Wyatt, I decided to befriend you, but then you got pregnant and stopped coming to the rodeo. Still, I’ve prayed for you ever since.”

  Her mouth went dry. Why would this woman pray for her? She didn’t need prayer. “Why did you want to befriend me?” Skepticism dripped from her tone.

  “Because I’ve been where you are. I used to go from man to man, trying to fill the loneliness inside.”

  “You don’t know anything about me,” Natalie spat out.

  “Maybe not. And I didn’t mean to insult you. I only know that I was lonely, no matter how many men there were. Until I finally found someone to fill the loneliness.”

  “Stetson? I don’t think I could settle for one man. I’m having way too much fun.” Her words rang hollow. Especially since she hadn’t been with anyone since Wyatt.

  “I love Stetson with everything I’ve got, but no—he didn’t fill my loneliness by himself.”

  Natalie’s insides bottomed out. “Your little girl?”

  “No. It took Jesus to fill my loneliness. I couldn’t settle with one man until Jesus settled me. And I couldn’t be a mother until Jesus showed me how to love.”

  The big tractor in the center of the arena roared to life and the Chicago Bulls’ theme song blared over the speakers.

  Natalie huffed a sigh. Thank goodness she wouldn’t have to hear any more Jesus talk for the night.

  * * *

  Lane parked his truck in front of her house, got out and came around to help her out. Her fingers clutched his arm. The drive was plenty well lit for him to get a final glimpse of her beauty. He focused on the house instead. He’d combated enough comments from the other cowboys about her to last him an eternity.

  Besides, he didn’t need to look. He’d memorized exactly how beautiful and tempting she was.

  “Want to come in?”

  Say no. Run. “Got any coffee?”

  “This time of night?” Natalie frowned.

  “I’m immune to it, doesn’t keep me up.”

  “Okay.” She let go of his arm and dug her keys from her purse.

  The lock clicked open and he followed her inside. Fancy. Cream-colored walls, white furnishings and trim, shimmering gold drapery. Very formal. Not what he’d expect of Natalie.

  “Come back here to the great room. It’s not so stuffy. I hate this room. Despite her horrible taste, my cousin Jenna is an interior decorator. I made the mistake of giving her free rein in here.”

  Now, that made sense. She led him to a room at the back of the house that had pale tan walls and deep brown furnishings, leopard paintings and fabrics, and throw pillows the color of the turquoise jewelry his grandmother used to collect. Now, this was Natalie.

  “Make yourself comfortable.” She slid off her boots. “I’ll be right back with your coffee. I’ve got one of those fancy one-cup contraptions, so it’s really fast.”

  He shouldn’t have come in. This was a dangerous game. In her house. Alone. At night. With the woman he happened to love. A woman who didn’t love Jesus.

  He should leave. But he didn’t want to.

  A bookcase lined one wall. It was full of romance novels with scantily clad women in intense embraces with bare-chested men.

  The painting over the fireplace caught his attention. Natalie’s parents were in the middle, her dad in a suit, her mama in a black ball gown. Caitlyn, her sister, was on the right, clad in a bright blue gown, her hair a shade lighter than Natalie’s and her eyes a darker blue. Pretty, but not as eye-popping as Natalie in hot-pink, form-fitting ruffles.

  “Here it is.” Natalie walked slowly into the room balancing a tray.

  He hurried to take the tray from her.

  “I didn’t know if you like cream and sugar, so I brought the works.”

  “Black is fine.”

  “Ugh. So bitter.” She handed the cup to him.

  “Aren’t you having any?”

  “I’d never sleep a wink if I had a cup this time of night.” She looked him over. “But maybe lack of sleep wouldn’t be such a bad thing if I had company.”

  His throat closed up. He sipped the steaming brew. “I’ll be out of your way in a minute.”

  She shrugged. “Suit yourself. Have a seat.”

  If he sat in the chair, then she couldn’t get too clos
e. His traitorous feet headed for the couch, instead.

  Natalie settled beside him, curling her long legs beside her, leaning toward him.

  Drink the coffee and get out of here. He cleared his throat. “How’s Caitlyn?”

  “She owns clothing stores at the Stockyards and the Galleria. We’re hoping she’ll get the contract to clothe the Cowtown rodeo staff.” She scooted closer to him. “How’s the coffee?”

  “Great.”

  “Good.” Her fingertip traced his jaw. “I was hoping it wasn’t too weak for you.”

  A tremor went through him.

  “What are you doing?” He batted her hand away and edged away from her.

  “Nothing.” She slid closer.

  His left hip lodged against the sofa arm.

  She penned him in.

  “Natalie, I’m not—”

  She pressed a fingertip to his lips. “I just want to make sure you don’t want to stay. We could have a lot of fun. For old times’ sake.”

  Her white teeth bit into her full bottom lip. Tantalizing.

  Lane’s gaze jerked away from her and he jumped up. “I can’t stay.”

  “I see.” Hurt tinged her tone as she rose to her feet.

  “I mean—I want to. I’d love to stay, more than you can imagine.” He cupped her cheek. “But I won’t.”

  He hurried toward the door.

  * * *

  Natalie charged after him. She couldn’t let him ruin her plan. “What? Are you married or something?”

  “No. But I’m a Christian.” He turned to face her, gently taking her by the shoulders. “Listen to me, Natalie. You’re beautiful. And I’d like to be your friend. You should be treasured. Not flaunted.”

  He sounded like her father. “Sounds boring.”

  “You’re special. And I was too stupid to see how special back in high school. I took something I had no right to. And I’d like the chance to make it up to you. But if you try to seduce me, we can’t be friends.”

  “Maybe I don’t want to be friends.” She moved in for the kill, sliding her hands up his muscled chest to curl around his neck.

  He pulled free and sidestepped her. His hand gripped the doorknob. “I want you to go to church with me.”

  “Friends? Church?” She shook her head and stepped away from him. His words doused her flame more effectively than a cold shower.