Shattered Heart: The Donnellys, Book 3
Page 15
Chapter Twenty-One
Cyn passed Carlos’s car as she slowed in front of her home and pulled into the driveway. What the hell is he doing here? She threw the Jeep in Park and stepped out. Carlos was already out of his car, on his way up the drive approaching her. Cyn stopped at the back of the Wrangler and crossed her arms. “What do you want, Carlos?”
“Can we talk, please? I just want to talk to you, Cyn.” Sincerity blanketed his features and guilt started to rise, but Cyn pushed it away.
She blew out a breath and brushed her hair out of her eyes. “I think you said everything that needed saying in your text messages.”
As Cyn turned to walk away, Carlos clasped her upper arm, halting her movement. “Baby, wait…”
She glared down at his hand, and then his face. “Let me go.”
He did as she asked, raising his hands in surrender. “I know I’ve been a jerk—”
“That is an understatement.”
“You’re right and…look, I’m sorry.”
Cyn crossed her arms again. There was no point in talking. There was nothing to debate…maybe if things were different—maybe if Shane weren’t in the picture, and maybe if Carlos hadn’t turned out to be a cheating bastard, she would’ve considered it.
Prior to Cyn catching Carlos cheating, she’d always taken him back, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise that he wasn’t taking no for an answer. “Sorry isn’t good enough anymore.”
“Baby, please.” His voice cracked. “I know I fucked up big-time, but just please, give me five minutes. I’m begging you.”
Before she could control it, guilt rose hard and fast, lodging a lump in her throat. Oh, Christ! Cyn let out a sigh and looked away from the tears welling in his eyes. She’d loved Carlos, a whole lot. And even though he’d killed every shred of feeling she’d had for him, it broke her heart seeing someone hurting that she once cared about so deeply. “Fine.” Cyn pivoted and headed for the house. “You want coffee?”
“Coffee’d be great.”
Cyn stepped inside her entryway and headed straight for the kitchen. Carlos took a seat at her kitchen table and Cyn set the coffee pot up to brew. “I’ll be right back.”
He nodded and she left the room, heading for her bedroom. The hair on the back of Cyn’s neck prickled in some odd awareness—of what she didn’t know. The whole situation just felt off to her somehow.
Cyn knew without a doubt that anything Carlos had to say would contain nothing but contradictions and bullshit, but she’d hear him out this one last time. In the past, whenever she tried to end things with him, he’d eventually show up, tail between his legs, begging her to come back to him. Each time she’d grab hold of whatever bait he cast.
Cyn changed from her work clothes into a pair of faded jeans and plain white T-shirt. She took a moment to freshen up in the bathroom, and then made her way back to the kitchen. Each time he pitched his game, she believed—though she knew deep in her gut it was all a ruse—that he wanted her.
And true to his promises, things would smooth out between them again, but never for very long. The truth was, Carlos never wanted her. At least not in the way she wanted him. Their relationship was always, simply, a game to him.
She pulled two mugs from the cabinet and fixed them both a fresh coffee. Cyn brought them to the table, handed one to Carlos and took a seat across from him. “Okay, talk.”
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table, cradling his mug in his palms. “I miss you.”
Cyn took a sip of the fresh coffee. She wasn’t going to tell him she missed him back—the truth was, she didn’t.
When she didn’t answer, he continued. “I know I fucked up, baby.”
She cringed, her skin crawling at his use of the endearment. “You said that already.”
“Guess I did.” He sipped his coffee. “Look, Cyn. That woman at my house…nothing happened. Now, I’m not saying it wouldn’t have, but bottom line is, nothing happened.”
“Doesn’t matter.”
He sat back. “Of course it matters.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I’m lost without you. I can’t sleep. I can’t eat. God, I can’t think straight, Cyn.” He traced the rim of his cup. “You have to come back. I love you, Cyn.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake! Cyn had waited forever to hear him say those words to her. Had longed for them, especially while she cried herself to sleep at night in a mad state of confusion trying to figure out why he didn’t feel the way she did. Or why, if he didn’t feel the same, he wouldn’t let her go. “I waited to hear you tell me you loved me for what seems like forever.” She rested her fingers on his forearm. “And I appreciate you finally saying it.”
He looked at her fingers before placing his hand over hers. “Why do I feel like there’s a but coming?”
“Because there is.” She pulled her hand away. “It’s too late.”
“Is there someone else?”
“No.” She picked up her coffee mug. It wasn’t a lie, not technically anyway. In less than a week, Shane would be gone. Besides, it was none of Carlos’s business whether or not there was someone new in Cyn’s life or not.
Carlos sat back in his seat. “Whose blue SUV is that?”
What the flying fuck! “Spying on me, Carlos?”
“No. Not spying. I just came by a few times because I wanted to talk, but when I saw another car in the driveway I figured you had company. So, who is it?”
Cyn debated what to say to him as she sipped her coffee. The remorse that’d been present in his expression a moment ago was now gone, and in its place was a look of smug satisfaction. The bastard thought he’d caught her. Cyn nodded. “Not that it’s any of your business, but it’s a very old friend of my family.”
“He or she?”
“Okay—” Cyn set the cup on the table, “—I think we’re done talking.”
“Wait!” He blew out a breath. “Dammit, fine. I just don’t understand how you can just walk away. Please don’t walk away, baby.”
Ugh! Cyn’s skin crawled with disgust. How in the hell did she ever love this man? “You cheated on me. Just because I got there before you fucked that chick, does not mean it doesn’t count. You had every intention of sticking your dick in that woman. And I’m sure you sealed the deal after I left your place that night.” She stood. “I’m done. This is done, Carlos.”
He got to his feet. “I can’t believe you’re doing this. How can you do this?”
“Well, believe it.” Cyn took her mug to the sink and then faced him again. “I think we’re done talking.”
“You ruined my life, Cyn. Fucking ruined it!” Carlos swiped the mug off the table and it crashed onto the floor, smashing into pieces.
“You asshole!” Cyn ran toward him and pointed in his face. “Get the hell out of my house!”
“You’re right, we’re done fucking talking. For now.” He stalked out of the room.
Cyn followed after him and slammed, then locked the door after he left. In a huff, she moved back to the kitchen, grabbed the trashcan and knelt in front of the broken mug. Careful not to cut herself, she picked up the bigger pieces and tossed them in the trash, and then grabbed the dustpan and swept up the rest.
Grateful Carlos had just about finished his coffee, she wiped up what little liquid was on the floor. As Cyn got to her feet, she looked up, to find Shane standing in the kitchen. A chill zipped down her spine and she jumped— “God dammit, you scared me!”
“Whoa, sorry. Guessing you didn’t hear me come in.” Shane moved to her and pulled her into his arms. “You okay?”
She gazed up into his soft blue eyes. “Much better now.”
“You have an accident?”
“Broke a coffee mug. One of my favorites too.” She pouted. There was no way she was going to tell him about Carlos—especially that he’d been the one to break th
e mug in one of his little fits. Shane would kick into alpha-male-overdrive mode, and probably go after Carlos, and that was the last thing any of them needed.
“Aw, that sucks.” He stroked her pouty lips with the pad of his thumb. “We’ll just have to go get you a new one.”
Cyn smiled and tipped her head back. “How about you just kiss me until I forget all about the mug?”
“Whatever you need, Cyn.” Shane bent his head and covered her mouth with his.
His sweet taste washed through her, and all thoughts of Carlos and broken mugs vanished into thin air. Shane was by far the best medicine she’d ever had. And he was leaving.
Cyn closed her eyes tighter, willing the sad thought away. She didn’t want to think about him leaving so she deepened the kiss and pressed her body tight against his big strong one. Right now he was in her arms, and that was just going to have to be good enough.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Shane finished getting ready in the hall bathroom while Cyn got ready in the master. They were going on a date—a real one. Not to say that the ones they’d gone on weren’t real, they were. It was just that Cyn had called them everything but dates. “Dinner with friends.” Or, “karaoke with her sister and friends.” Then, “happy hour.” And, “the movies.”
It was rather cute, and Shane started referring to the time they spent together outside of the house as their “un-dates”. Every time he did, Cyn would roll her eyes and shoot him a grin that made him want to kiss her lips until she panted for breath. So, he usually did.
He stepped out into the hall and stuck his head into her bedroom. “You ’bout ready?”
“I’ll be out in a minute. Go wait in the living room, like a good date should,” she said from behind her bathroom door.
“All right then. Don’t make me wait too long, now.” He chuckled and made his way to the living room. Settling on the sofa, Shane stretched out his long legs, crossing his cowboy-booted feet at the ankle. His skin tingled with excitement; he couldn’t help it. He was taking her country dancing and was beyond eager to get her out on the floor again. Shane recalled the first dance he’d ever had with her—the night of Ryan and Maiya’s bachelor and bachelorette party. They’d ended up in the corner making out. A smile spread across Shane’s lips. He wouldn’t trade that night for the world.
“Okay, ready.”
Shane scrambled to his feet, his eyes glued to her the whole time. She wore a fitted mini-dress a gorgeous shade of coral. The color of the fabric enhanced her already sun-kissed skin. It had short sleeves and a rounded neckline that scooped low enough to taunt him with a fair amount of visible cleavage. The edge of the dress, which landed mid-thigh, had a delicate ruffle. To top off her outfit, at the end of her fit legs was a pair of worn brown leather cowgirl boots.
“Oh God. Why do you look like that? Is this okay?” She twisted from side to side, the ruffle fanning out from her tempting thighs. “Say something, Shane.”
“Girl…” He blew out a breath. “Dayyumm.”
She dipped her chin and raised her brows. “Is that a good dayyumm or a bad one?”
Shane shook his head and chuckled. “Come on now. You look unfuckingbelievable!”
“Yeah?”
He stepped to her and pulled her against him. “Oh yeah.”
“You sure?” She licked her lips, gazing up at him.
Shane growled and bent close, keeping his lips a bare breath away from hers. “I’m so sure that if we don’t go right this instant, I may end up bending you over the arm of the couch.”
“Well…” She cleared her throat. “I guess I better call us an Uber car then.”
“Guess you better.” Closing the distance, he took her mouth in a hard kiss. Shane drew in a breath through his nose as he tangled his tongue with hers in a frantic dance. Cyn moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck. Lust sparked hot between them in the same way it had the first time he’d ever kissed her. Shane lifted her off her feet, holding her tighter against him. Lord have mercy, this woman was everything he ever wanted.
Cyn broke from his lips and gasped. “Fuck, you kill me.”
“Why’s that?” He ran his lips down her throat.
“Because now my freaking panties are soaked and I need you to bend me over the couch.”
He chuckled and set her back on her feet. “Well, we’re even. My dick is hard as steel and I want inside you more than I want to breathe, but I’m gonna make us both wait.” He kissed the tip of her nose.
She frowned. “And why are you making us wait?”
“Because I wanna take my girl dancing.” He smiled.
Her eyes went wide before she narrowed them and shook her head with another tempting smirk on her lips. “Fine.”
Shane swatted her ass and stepped past her. “Call that car.”
Shane resumed his spot on the couch as Cyn requested the car via the app on her cell phone. He called her his girl. He’d meant the words—she was his girl. In every way, but he hadn’t intended to just let it slide out so casually. No taking it back now, and he couldn’t say he was unhappy about that.
Once again, Shane had no idea how he would manage leaving her in less than a week. He chewed his thumbnail, and stared down at the area rug. Cyn had filled all the cracks inside him that Shane hadn’t even realized were there. He had to be insane to give her up.
“Car’ll be here in four minutes.” She opened her small purse. “I need to fix my lipstick.”
“Did you smudge it?” He looked up at her and grinned.
“You smudged it!” She laughed and moved to the mirror near the front door. “You gotta let it dry before you go kissing it off me, you know.”
“Not my fault your lips are always begging for me to kiss them.” Shane got to his feet again. “Just doing my duty, ma’am.” He stepped behind her and kissed her neck.
“Ohhhh, I get it. Like a public service, right?”
“Zzzaactly.” He ran his palms over her hips to her stomach, then up to her breasts.
“Are those begging for attention too?”
“Always. They’re just so needy!”
She chuckled. “You’re right. They are. I think I need you to come all over them later. You know, after you fuck between them.”
“Like I keep telling you, whatever you need, you get.” Shane bent his knees and rolled his hips, grinding his erection against her full ass. He watched her in the mirror as a gasp escaped her lips. Cyn arched, rubbing against him, and Shane gritted his teeth. Jesus, he couldn’t get enough of her.
An alert sounded on her phone and Cyn looked down at the screen. “Damn. The car is here. Fucking hell, Shane. I’m all worked up now.”
“Good. I like knowing your pussy’s all wet for me.” Satisfaction flowed through him as he stepped back from her. Damn right she was wet for him. She was always wet for him, just like he was always hard for her. Their chemistry was off the charts and kept growing.
“And I like knowing your dick is throbbing hard right now.” She laughed and grabbed her purse.
He was tempted to make the car wait—it’d be worth it for the chance to sink into her heaven before they went. Determined to hold off, he blew out a breath and tamped down his arousal as best he could. This was their first official date and he wanted this night with her more than anything. Waiting a few hours for the heaven he always found in her would be worth it. He took her hand. “Let’s get gone.”
* * * * *
Cyn stepped inside the country bar, hand in hand with Shane. The rhythmic sound of Christina Aguilera belting out “The Real Thing” echoed around them.
Shane bent to her ear. “Let’s grab a beer.”
She nodded and he led her to the main bar. This was the same place they’d met up after Maiya’s bachelorette party. Cyn glanced over to the far corner of the club where she’d first kissed Shane. I
t’d been almost three weeks since that night.
Which meant, after avoiding him for a week after the wedding, she’d had two weeks of non-stop cataclysmic sex. Two weeks of consistent orgasms. Two weeks of a man paying attention to her without her having to wait, ask, beg or yell for that attention.
So far, Shane had given her everything she’d ever imagined wanting or needing in a relationship—with one very big exception. She couldn’t allow herself to think of them as a couple. Cyn still didn’t trust him, or herself. It wasn’t fair to him, she knew, but it couldn’t be helped. And he was leaving.
Shane turned from the bar and handed her a shot glass. She looked down at the amber liquid. “Jameson?”
“Of course.” He held his glass up. “Toast?”
“You make it.”
“Hmm.” He smiled, his bright blue eyes calling her name. “New beginnings.”
Shit. Cyn drew in a breath and nodded. Or another ending. They tapped the edge of their glasses on the bar top and then tossed them back. The whiskey burned on its way down her throat but warmed her insides. Shane handed her the bottle of beer, then bent and kissed her. The warmth from the shot spread through her to her limbs, ignited further by his kiss.
“Come on, girl.” Shane pulled her toward the edge of the dance floor.
The Dixie Chicks “Baby Hold On” played and several couples danced, some two-stepping, others doing a waltz. Cyn took a sip of her beer and watched. She couldn’t do half the dances she’d seen at this bar, but regardless, Shane would be dragging her around the floor soon enough. Good thing she was a fast learner and Shane was a strong lead. He’d support her until she caught on.
She took another swig of her beer, her eyes glued to the many couples circling the floor. Shane had chosen this activity as their official first-date night, and Cyn realized whether she wanted to admit they were a couple or not, tonight, the dancing would force them to be exactly that. Of course it was definitely possible to dance with someone and not be a couple, but when a woman danced with a man they were intimately involved with, there was no way around it.