Damarian (A Merman's Kiss Novel)

by Dee J. Stone

  My lips move, but no sound leaves my mouth.

  “We are not like everyone else, Damarian, no matter how many times we wish it. Do you not think there have been a few instances where I have wished for another life as well? To be carefree without the worry of every creature of the sea’s welfare on my shoulders? Do you believe it is my wish to spend my days making peace between the dolphins or finding a new location for the turtles to live? Sometimes I yearn to leave Eteria and have friends. But that is not possible for me. Is it fair to me that you—the true heir to the throne—can live his life the way he chooses when I am bound to my tiara?”

  I remain utterly still as her words penetrate my mind. She is correct. All she has just revealed to me is correct. I understood her life is not easy, but I did not imagine it was so.

  I lower my head as far as I can. “Forgive me, my princess. I was not aware of your true feelings.”

  She touches the top of my head. “Perhaps that is the problem. We have not shared anything with one another. Not once.”

  She is correct about this as well. I never felt close to her because we did not open our hearts. Now that we have, I do feel as though we have entered another height in our relationship. Perhaps if we have done this earlier, things would be different. Perhaps I would not have met Cassie. But I do not regret meeting her. She has brought so much joy to my life, has caused me to feel sensations I had never felt before. But she is a human and I am a child of the sea. The heir to the throne. Many are relying on me to take the crown and rule them in the manner a true ruler should.

  Yet, my heart beats for Cassie. My body yearns for her. My soul is empty without her by my side. How can I choose?

  Princess Flora’s hand moves from the top of my head to my chin, and she raises it so I am forced to look at her. “I do not wish to hurt you any more than you wish to hurt me. I was raised to be a fair ruler, but harsh when the time arises. I understand how difficult it must have been for you all these moons, and I apologize for not showing my sympathy. But no matter our feelings, there is the entire sea to consider. Sometimes we cannot achieve what we desire most. Sometimes, we must sacrifice our own happiness for the welfare of others.”

  I swallow hard as my body grows stiff.

  “I have given you a lot to contemplate,” she says, her eyes and tone soft. “I cannot force you to mate with me and take the throne, nor do I wish to be mated to one who will grow to despise me. There is no rush in our mating. Please take as much time as you require to make a decision. My only request is that you think not of yourself or me, but of the every single creature in the sea.” She leans forward to press a light kiss on my cheek. “You may take your leave.”

  ***

  Father enters my room as I play with the little ones. He gives each one a kiss before asking them to leave so he and I could talk. I peer at his face, trying to determine if he is still furious with me. He appears relaxed.

  “Please sit, Damarian.” Father pats one of the stone chairs before lowering himself on another one.

  I join him.

  He stretches his arm toward me and places it on my shoulder. “My son, I understand how you desperately yearn to experience the love I share with your mother. Once upon a time, I was young as well. I am not fond of the rift that has developed between us. I am not fond that we constantly quarrel. You are my fry and I wish to do what I feel is best for you.”

  Father and I do not have these sorts of talks often. I admit I am enjoying this very much, although a part of me feels as though I cannot fully open up to him. For I know deep inside that he will never accept the way I truly feel.

  “There is no reason why you cannot learn to love the princess. There are many children of the sea who do not love their mates when they are bonded. But they understand that the love between two mates blossoms over the moons they share together. I loved your mother when we mated, but I did not understand what true love meant until we spent many moons together and started a family. It is all right if you do not feel anything for the princess. I assure you that you will.”

  I do not understand. He talks as though he did not hear about Cassie. Is he perhaps pretending I did not meet her and all is well?

  Father squeezes my shoulder. “I understand the appeal of the humans. We are curious about them, just as they are curious about the creatures in the sea. You are not the first to wander too close to the shore and you most certainly will not be the last. But King Palaemon forbids us from traveling to land because the humans—while intriguing—are not benevolent creatures. Their curiosity about the sea caused them to destroy it. Some of the damage is irreparable.”

  I look into my father’s eyes, hoping he sees what I feel. “Cassie is not like that, Father. You must understand. She is kind and gentle, and she has promised to conceal my true identity.”

  “Humans are not like us. They cannot comprehend what it means to be devoted to a mate. She will leave you, Damarian. I assure you she will.”

  No, I do not believe that.

  “It is their nature. They cannot help it. You will not be able to choose another mate. You will yearn for her for all eternity.”

  No. I cannot accept this. I cannot.

  Father’s hand moves to my arm. “Damarian, the princess has forgiven you for abandoning her the night of your mating ceremony. She is a kind and forgiving being.”

  “I have told her about Cassie,” I say.

  Father’s mouth shuts and his eyes grow large. “You have told her? I specifically ordered you not to tell a soul, least of all a member of the royal family!”

  “She will keep my words in confidence. She and I…things have changed.”

  His eyebrows furrow. “I am afraid I do not understand.”

  Princess Flora and I, finally, have bared our hearts a little and have shared some of our true feelings with one another. If I am forced to take the throne, I cannot say I would choose anyone more suitable. But though I respect her on a whole new level, I cannot say I will ever love her, or any female, the way I love Cassie. And that, to me, is what lays heavily on my heart and mind.

  “Nothing, Father,” I say. “But do not fret. All is well with the princess.”

  “Are you to mate with her?” he asks.

  “I…” Princess Flora’s face enters my mind, her harsh-turned-kind eyes boring into mine. She will be a great queen, a devoted one who will put the needs of the entire sea before her own. Then the face of Cassie Price enters my mind, her beautiful eyes the color of land, the way they stared up at me with nothing but love in them. I can feel her soft body pressed to mine, the sensations she awakened inside me. The only thing I feel in my body at this moment is to have my human in my arms. How I long for her.

  “The sea is your home, Damarian,” Father says. “Your family is here. Your friends are here. We are not meant to live on land. You cannot live there without being discovered. Think of the danger you place yourself in when you are on land. Think of your family and the colony. We will never know peace.”

  No, I cannot think of this. I cannot bear it. I do not want to worry about such matters. I wish only to be with my human.

  Those are the words of a fry. That is how I have been behaving all this time. Like a fry, just as the princess claimed.

  Father rubs my shoulder. “You know what the correct choice is. Good night.”

  No, Father is mistaken. There is no correct choice. Either one I choose will lead me toward a different path. But after the discussions I have had both with Father and the princess, I realize I cannot only take me into consideration. There is the entire sea and her creatures to factor in as well.

  I lie down in my shell and stare at the top of the cave. I do not know what to do.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  When nighttime arrives and every member of my family goes to sleep, I leave the cave as quietly as possible. I spent the last few hours lying in my shell and weighing every option. The only thing I gained from my musings is pain in my head. I have not reached a
decision, but I must return to Cassie. For I promised I would see her tonight, and because I desperately wish to hold her in my arms, feel the heat of her body as she is pressed so close to me, and to feel her warm lips moving against mine. All I wish is to be with her for all eternity, but I am so confused. It is my hope that once I spend more time with her, I will determine whether what she and I have is true and I will know what the correct choice is.

  But as I near the shore, I feel something amiss. I hear cries and frantic movements in the water, as though a human is in distress.

  “Damarian!”

  Cassie? I pump my tail and surge toward her voice. What has happened? Why is she is in the sea? My heart beats so fast I fear I may grow ill. The only thought in my head is that I must go to her. I must help her.

  It is not long before I see her in the distance, her arms and legs kicking, the seawater choking her. She is no match for the violent waves. In less than a few minutes, she will be pulled under.

  With every last strength I possess, I pump my tail, faster and faster, until I reach her. My arms close around her middle and I haul her to the surface. Once her mouth has swallowed in enough air, her eyes open and she looks relieved to see me.

  “Cassie, what is the matter?” I ask.

  Her hands clutch my arms so tightly she halts the blood flow. “You need to swim away! He saw you and has it on video. He’s going to expose you.”

  “Who?”

  “Kyle. It’s not safe for you here.”

  I do not understand what she is saying, but her face looks terrified, not for herself but for me, and I know I must bring us to a safe location. I heave her onto my back. “Take hold of me.”

  Her arms and legs squeeze around me. Her entire body trembles, due to the cold and the terror I sense in her.

  “I am to swim under,” I yell over the intense waves that crash into us. “Take in air.”

  I feel her chest expand on my back. Once I am certain she has inhaled enough oxygen, I descend under the waves. Her legs tighten around my middle. I swim at an extremely fast pace for I do not know how long she can withstand being in the sea before she will require more air. From all my observations on the humans as they swam in the water, I learned they return to the surface for oxygen after a very short time. I quickly bring Cassie up for air and wait as she inhales and exhales rapidly.

  “One more time,” I tell her. “Are you prepared?”

  She nods.

  I sense her struggling as we once again are under the waves. I pump my tail as fast as I can, but her hold on me loosens, as though she is growing weak. I surge into the opening of a cave and push my body upward, until our heads break the surface. This cave is located close to the shore where the water does not reach the top, leaving room for air.

  Cassie’s chest expands and contrasts wildly as she gasps in as much air as possible. Once she has somewhat relaxed, she examines the area. “Where are we?”

  “It is a cave not too far from land. We shall be safe here.”

  Her entire body quakes, even her teeth. I rub her arms, hoping my movements provide her with enough heat. But she is far too cold.

  “I must return you to land soon. Cassie, what is the matter? Who is going to expose me?”

  “I went to the beach to meet you,” she says, then swallows hard. “Someone else was there.” She swallows another time. “Kyle.”

  “The human whom you have had a past relationship with?” I ask.

  “Yeah. He…” She presses her lips together and her body trembles. “He managed to capture your transformation on camera. He threatened to expose you.”

  I am not quite certain what a camera is, but I understand enough. I feel my own body begin to quake. Everything I have feared is coming to pass—I have placed myself, my family, and the entire colony in grave danger.

  “I’m so sorry,” Cassie says.

  It was my desire to meet a female who would cause me to feel wonderful sensations and who would make me the happiest being in the world. And I have found it with Cassie Price. But at a great cost. Father was correct—the children of the sea will no longer know peace. We will be required to locate elsewhere, constantly live in fear…

  “I guess…” Cassie says. “I guess…”

  I know what she wishes to tell me. And even though I have never felt such fear in my life, I am certain about one thing—I do not want to lose Cassie Price. I know she loves me deeply, for she put herself in danger when she tried to warn me about the human Kyle. The sea nearly swallowed her. But I will not allow some human to keep me from her. And after the discussions with Father and Princess Flora, I was not certain what the correct choice was.

  But now as I hold Cassie in my arms, in a location that is both land and sea, I know what I must do. I must choose love. I must choose Cassie. Because just as I am willing to sacrifice my life and safety for her, she is willing to do the same for me. Father will have to understand, as well as the princess and the rest of the children of the sea. I will no longer allow others to dictate what I do and what I feel. And the human Kyle? I will locate him on land and force him to keep my identity a secret.

  “No,” I tell Cassie. “We shall not say goodbye.”

  “What can we do? I won’t let you risk your life.”

  “He is but one human,” I remind her.

  “But if he gives it to news stations or posts it online…I need to talk to him tomorrow. I need to convince him not to tell anyone.”

  I stroke her cheek. “Do you think he will listen to you?” If not, I will make certain that he listens to me. I hold Cassie close to my chest. “I cannot bear the thought of parting with you.”

  She wraps her arms around my neck. “Me, either.”

  “We shall meet tomorrow night,” I say. “Wait for me on the rocks. If I do not see you in the distance, it is a sign that it is not safe to come to land.”

  “Okay.” She moves back and peers at my face. Hers is filled with nothing but worry and guilt. “This is crazy, Damarian. We’re risking your life. The lives of your people. I can’t make you do this.”

  I have been frightened all this time, but now I am determined. If that human dares to expose the colony, he will answer to me. Cassie told me he has proof of my existence, therefore he can expose us whether or not she and I continue to meet. I may have no choice but to conceal myself with the rest of the clans until it is safe again. If this is to be our last few moments together for a while, I wish to cherish as much of it as possible. “My love for you surpasses all,” I tell her.

  “Let’s wait a few days. Maybe a week.”

  I press my forehead against hers. “I wish to be with you now. I cannot bear being apart.”

  Her skin has grown quite blue and she shakes uncontrollably.

  “I see the way you tremble. The sea is not for you. I must come on land.”

  I do not know if we will be able to be together tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after that. But I will not allow that human to keep her from me. I will not allow my duty to keep her from me. The princess will choose another mate, one whom is just as capable as I am to rule the clans. The children of the sea will have no choice but to accept my decision. I am the true heir to the throne, but it is not my destiny. Of that I am certain.

  Cassie kisses me. “I love you.”

  “I have never loved anyone as I love you.”

  Her face relaxes a bit at my words. But she continues to shiver.

  “You must return to land.”

  I bring her to land in the same manner I brought her to the cave, but I do not swim too close to the shore in case that human Kyle is at the beach.

  “Tomorrow night,” I tell Cassie.

  She moves closer to place a sweet, yet passionate kiss on my lips. As it grows more intense, I reach to pull her closer to me, but she swims away. I watch her form grow smaller and smaller as she reaches the shore. She does not look back, perhaps because she is worried the human may be on land and she does not wish to pinpoint my e
xact location.

  I understand she is frightened for me and carries a lot of guilt, and I feel the same way. But I will do everything in my power to keep the children of the sea safe. I am the one who has caused this and I am the one to fix it. Once it is safe for me to come on land, I will speak to the human and deny his claims, perhaps threaten to abandon him at the bottom of the sea. Of course I would never hurt him, but I am certain instilling fear in him will cause him to keep his mouth closed.

  Fiske swims to my side once I have submerged underwater. I sensed your thoughts were troubled. What has happened?

  Fiske, I need to tell you something, but you must promise not tell a single soul.

  I promise.

  A human has discovered my secret. He threatened to expose me to other humans.

  He stares at me with wide eyes.

  I will do whatever I can to force him to keep this discovery to himself, but I must ask you a favor as well.

  Yes, Damarian. Anything.

  Do not tell the Sentinels about this news, but please be vigilant. If humans are to invade the waters seeking for the colonies, you must gather the other sharks and halt them. Do not allow them to discover our location. It is my hope that they will surrender their efforts once they cannot locate us. Then perhaps they would not believe the human’s words as true.

  Fiske nods. Of course. I will do as you ask.

  I rub the top of his head. Thank you.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  I do not return home because I am certain my family has discovered that I have traveled to meet with Cassie. I do not wish to hurt or upset them by informing them of my decision. One day soon I will speak to them, but I believe it is wise I give them time to familiarize themselves with it. And I do not wish to impose on the royal family or the other children of the sea. Perhaps once they see that the princess has chosen a capable mate to rule by her side, they would be more welcoming to me.