The Rom-Com Collection: The Plus One, Something for the Weekend, A Marriage of Connivance

by Natasha West

  ‘How am I supposed to believe that anymore? You left her for me. What’s to stop you leaving me for her?’

  ‘Because of THIS!’ Zoe said wildly as she pulled the ring box out of her bag. She threw it on the table. ‘I was going to propose to you!’

  Caitlin looked at the box but made no move to open it. Zoe grabbed it and popped it open so that Caitlin could see its contents. A white gold ring with a diamond the size of a new-born’s fist.

  But still, Caitlin didn’t move.

  ‘Caitlin, I want you to marry me’ Zoe begged.

  Caitlin said nothing.

  ‘PLEASE! SAY SOMETHING!’ Zoe shouted. She didn’t care about the scene they were now making in the restaurant.

  At last, Caitlin spoke.

  ‘I’m moving to Tokyo.’

  Jordan and Ellie watched as Caitlin stood up and waltzed out of the restaurant. The last few seconds of their conversation had not needed to be eavesdropped on. It had been performed at maximum volume.

  Jordan and Ellie looked at each other in amazement. They’d done it. They’d really done it.

  Zoe, who’d been sitting in a kind of stupor for the last few seconds, finally stood up and began to saunter despondently through the restaurant. She caught Ellie’s eye on her way out and a moment of understanding passed between them.

  Zoe’s face said one clear thing to Ellie. ‘I know I deserve this.’

  And she left.

  Jordan had caught the look between Zoe and Ellie. But she’d interpreted it quite differently. ‘But so what?’ Jordan told herself. ‘You got what you wanted.’

  It had been everything they’d planned for. It had come off perfectly. Caitlin and Zoe were finished. They’d lasted less than a month. But the victory didn’t taste as good as she’d hoped. It felt hollow. Because with the end of Caitlin and Zoe, came another end. Hers and Ellie’s alliance.

  But if it was all over, then what was there to do about it? Nothing. She would toast it all out properly though, she decided. She grabbed a passing waiter’s eye and said ‘Excuse me, could you bring us some champagne? I’d like the stuff that’s relatively cheap but still pretty decent.’

  He nodded and went off to fetch a bottle.

  ‘I guess we do have something to celebrate’ Ellie said.

  ‘Absolutely. We won’ Jordan said, hoping it sounded as though she meant it.

  But Ellie didn’t feel very much like a winner. She wondered if she should really have done all this. What was the point? What did it matter whether Caitlin and Zoe lasted or not?

  Maybe she should have just let them be. And maybe she should have been looking for her own happiness, rather than wasting her time trying to tear down someone else’s. It didn’t really make any difference to how she felt in the grand scheme of things. She was no better off for it.

  The champagne arrived. The waiter popped it gently for them and poured out two glasses.

  ‘Celebrating something?’ the waiter asked.

  ‘Yes’ Ellie replied. ‘The end of an era.’

  The waiter smiled and left.

  ‘Actually’ Jordan said ‘that’s more true than you think.’

  ‘Oh?’ Ellie asked.

  ‘Yes. I was thinking, now we’re done with all this, maybe it’s time for a change. I think I should move out.’

  Ellie could barely find words to reply, but eventually, she managed to sputter out a response.

  ‘But it’s your flat! Where will you go?’

  ‘I’m not sure. Anyway, the flat’s full of your furniture now. It’s just as much yours as it is mine. Maybe I’ll move to a different city, start again. Wherever there’s dogs, I can make a living. Which is pretty much anywhere. And there’s nothing here for me anymore.’

  Ellie felt her stomach sink. She couldn’t bear the thought of Jordan leaving. Even if Ellie couldn’t be with her, she still couldn’t imagine living in a Jordan-less world.

  ‘Are you sure?’ she asked, for want of a better question.

  Jordan was about to reply that of course she was sure. But then she wondered what the point of that was. Why bother lying anymore? She was done pretending.

  ‘I’m not that sure about anything, as a matter of fact. But I know I can’t live with you anymore, Ellie.’

  ‘Me? Why not?’

  ‘Because I’ve been incredibly stupid. I’ve let myself fall for you’ Jordan heard her stupid mouth say. ‘And I know that’s not what we were supposed to be about. But there it is. I know that you still love Zoe, you don’t need to say it. And I guess she’s free now, so…’

  Ellie’s heart flew into her mouth. She went into a kind of shock. Jordan wanted her. And not just for sex. For keeps.

  Right then, all Ellie wanted to do was let her know that she felt exactly the same, that she’d fallen for Jordan too. Hard. She was trying to figure out the right words, the best words, words that would let Jordan know the truth, the truth that didn’t need to be hidden from her any longer. She needed to start with the most important thing. That she didn’t love Zoe.

  ‘Jordan, I don’t want…’

  Jordan stood up, knowing what was coming. She didn’t need to have to sit there and actually listen to it. She couldn’t believe she’d done it again. She’d laid herself bare for someone who didn’t care. And now she had to get the hell out of here.

  Ellie understood what the misunderstanding was instantly and cried out ‘Jordan! No! I didn’t mean…’ trying to stop Jordan from leaving. But she was lightening quick.

  Ellie stood to follow her out but the maître d’ suddenly stepped in front of her.

  ‘If you’re planning a dine and dash, you’ve forgotten the dining bit. But you still need to pay for the champagne’ he said snarkily.

  ‘For fuck sakes’ Ellie cried as she reached into her handbag and pulled out several notes, flinging them at him. ‘Here! Just get out of my bloody way, would you?!’

  The maître d’ scrabbled on the ground for the money, still an obstacle. But Ellie had no intention of letting him delay her even another second. She leapfrogged over his back. ‘Hey’ he cried out in protest, but he was a dot in the distance to Ellie now. She was throwing herself through the doors, hoping to catch up with Jordan.

  She ran out onto the bustling street. It was still early and crowds of people filled the pavement. Ellie looked desperately about, trying to see through the throng. But there was no sign of Jordan.

  Half an hour later, Ellie had finally managed to flag down a cab to take her back to the flat. She’d be able to find Jordan at home, explain what she meant. And she knew exactly what she wanted to say to her this time. The cab ride had given her time to put it together. She wouldn’t be misunderstood again.

  But as the cab pulled in, Ellie saw something that made her mouth go dry. Jordan’s van wasn’t in its usual spot.

  Ellie paid the cab driver, jumped out of the car and sprinted toward the front door. She fumbled with the keys for what felt like a thousand years before she finally got the door open, hoping that there was a simple reason that the vehicle was missing. She had the wild hope that maybe someone had stolen it.

  But once she’d opened the front door and entered the flat, she felt Jordan’s lack immediately. She knew she wasn’t there.

  But still, she tapped on Jordan’s door.

  ‘Jordan?’

  No response. She walked into the room, feeling a little weird about invading Jordan’s space. But Ellie had to be certain she wasn’t still there, that she hadn’t missed her chance to tell her how she felt. But of course, there was no Jordan. Only a wardrobe with the doors flung open, the hangers naked of clothes.

  Jordan was gone.

  Chapter Eighteen

  It was Monday morning, two days after the end of everything.

  In a bank in the heart of the city, Zoe was sat in her office. Her desk phone was ringing, but it went unanswered. She didn’t care who was calling.

  There was a knock at the door.

  ‘What
do you want?’ Zoe asked with disinterest.

  A head popped around the door. It was Zoe’s assistant, Henry. He was twenty-two and eager.

  ‘Miss Cook?’ he asked, nervously. There was a strange vibe in his boss’s office.

  ‘What is it?’

  ‘Err, everyone’s waiting in the conference room? It’s the regional meeting. Did I not put it in your calendar?’ he asked, suddenly alarmed.

  The regional meeting was ordinarily at the forefront of Zoe’s mind. But not today. Today, she couldn’t give two shits.

  ‘Tell them to carry on without me’ she said.

  ‘Why should I tell them you can’t come?’ Henry asked, anxiously.

  ‘Henry, would you just make something up? Tell them I’m sick, that I’m in here puking in my bin. I really don’t care. Just deal with it, would you?’

  Henry considered asking her what was wrong. But she was kind of a terrifying boss. Better to leave it.

  He nodded and left.

  Zoe’s phone began to ring again. She picked it up and pressed the ‘End Call’ button. She left the phone off the hook.

  In another part of the city, Caitlin was reading an email on her phone.

  ‘Dear Miss Day,

  I regret to inform you that I must retract the offer of employment that I made verbally last week. Unfortunately, Vindictae has gone unexpectedly into administration and will no longer be trading.

  My deepest apologies for any inconvenience caused. Good luck with all your future endeavours.

  Kind Regards,

  Samantha Frost’

  Caitlin deleted the email and lay back on the single bed in her father’s spare bedroom. She started to laugh.

  Her father, Eric, who was passing in the hallway en route to the lavatory, popped his head in at the sound.

  ‘Something funny?’

  Caitlin looked at her father, the man who’d told her as a child never to stay in one place too long, never to get attached, never to get weighed down by anyone, the man who was now just a sad middle-aged guy in a tiny flat with nothing and no-one to call his own, and heaved an angry sigh.

  ‘Not in the slightest. Piss off, Dad.’

  Eric considered asking what was wrong with his daughter. But what was the point? The girl was probably just having her period or something. That’s why he couldn’t understand women. They were too ruled by their bodies.

  Eric felt his bladder begin to throb, screaming for relief.

  ‘Gotta go. Time and tide wait for no man’ he said as he shut the door.

  Caitlin stared at the closed door. After a while, she got her phone out. She began to cycle through her contacts until she saw Zoe’s name. But she didn’t press call. Instead, she went back through the alphabet, until she reached the J’s. She called her only contact under that letter and listened to the phone ring and ring. Eventually, a voice drifted down the receiver.

  ‘This ought to be interesting. Wasn’t expecting to hear from you ever again’ Jordan said.

  ‘I’m sure you weren’t. But I thought I owed you a call.’

  ‘How so?’ Jordan asked, sounding tired.

  ‘I wanted to tell you I was sorry for how I treated you.’

  ‘You’re calling to say sorry?’ Jordan asked in sheer disbelief.

  ‘Yeah. I treated you like shit. I treat everyone like shit. But I hope you get that it wasn’t about you.’

  ‘Err… OK’ Jordan replied uncertainly.

  ‘So, I’m sorry. That’s all. I’m just fucking sorry. Good luck with all your future endeavours’ Caitlin finished and hung up. She lay back on the bed, letting tears slip from her eyes.

  Jordan looked at her phone, amazed. It was the phone call she’d never seen coming. Maybe it was a good day to buy a lottery ticket?

  Jordan was currently sitting in the back of her van, the back doors open, her legs dangling out, looking at the large national park. It was a place she sometimes took her bigger dogs to for a better run, a little further out than the normal common.

  Jordan stepped out of the van, stretching out her back. It had been a cramped couple of nights in there, curled up in a sleeping bag. But she’d needed a place to collect herself while she figured out her next move, somewhere that Ellie wouldn’t be able to find her. That was the absolute last thing she needed.

  People always told you to beware of the bad girls. And Jordan had never heeded them. She’d always let herself get sucked in by the obvious heart breakers. And for once, she’d gone with the good girl. And the end result had been exactly the same.

  Her phone beeped. It was another message from Ellie. She deleted it without opening it. She couldn’t bear another text asking her to come home so they could talk. She knew what Ellie wanted to say. It would be a ‘I’m sorry you’re in love with me but I’m not interested. Let’s be besties though!’ type of talk. Jordan couldn’t be fucked with it. Better to just move on.

  Jordan watched a couple of Scottie dogs ambling about in the distance, under the watchful eye of their owner. And then Jordan thought ‘Maybe I could move to Scotland?’

  At Little Tykes, Ellie had half an eye on the kids while she rang Jordan for the millionth time. Why the hell wasn’t she picking up?

  A little girl called Lily with a permanently snotty nose wandered up to Ellie.

  ‘Miss Hopkins?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes, Lily?’

  ‘Who are you calling?’

  ‘A friend. But she’s not answering.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘I’m not sure.’

  ‘Maybe she lost her phone. My mummy lost hers and my dad went mad. Why don’t you go and see her instead?’ Lily asked, already losing interest. Maybe she should go and stroke Boris the hamster for a bit?

  ‘Because I don’t know where she is’ Ellie said. Then it struck her. Maybe she did know where she’d be. Jordan had told her where she was every day at six. With Dave the Dachshund.

  But what would she say if she saw her? Ellie had been sending her messages, asking her to come home so that she could tell her everything in person. So she could explain that she wanted to be with her. But for some reason, Jordan wasn’t replying to them.

  Perhaps Ellie would need to go a bit bigger than a crappy text. She’d tried to use words once and Jordan hadn’t understood them. Words were apparently not Ellie’s friend right now. Not when it came to Jordan.

  Ellie needed action to win Jordan back, she decided. And then, once again, inspiration hit Ellie Hopkins.

  It was another scheme. Ellie thought it would probably be her last. She was sick of all this deviousness. As good as she apparently was at it, it wasn’t for her anymore.

  But one last little plot might fix everything.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Jordan was at the common, watching Dave. He was rolling around in fox shit.

  Jordan made no move to stop him. He was having fun. To him, it was like bathing in some wonderful scent. Jordan knew that if Chanel ever decided to develop a scent for dogs, the first thing they’d need to figure out was how to get the foxes to squat over the bottles.

  Once Dave had finished wriggling about in the pile of crap, he was ready for some serious ball play. He ran up to Jordan’s feet and yipped at her.

  ‘Alright, boy. Hold on’ Jordan said, as she searched her pockets for his favourite little ball. Dave yipped again. ‘I’m getting it, yeah? Chill pill, Dave’ Jordan said as she tossed the ball across the common. Jordan watched it roll along the grass, landing at the feet of a woman.

  As the woman looked down at the ball, Jordan realised she knew her. It was Zoe. The second to last person on earth Jordan didn’t need to see right now.

  Jordan couldn’t imagine what on earth she was doing here. Was it possible that it was just a coincidence? Jordan thought that seemed unlikely. She’d organised enough ‘coincidences’ lately to be suspicious of them.

  ‘Jordan?’ Zoe said, equally amazed. Why the fuck couldn’t she seem to avoid this woman?

/>   ‘You’re not here to see me, are you?’ Jordan asked her. But how the hell would Zoe know where she was, even if she did need something from her?

  But before Zoe could explain herself, they were interrupted.

  ‘Actually’ a voice said ‘She’s here because of me.’