On Stranger Prides

by Amy Cecil

  “Max, stop, I want to go back to my cabin,” she said as I closed the door behind us.

  “No. You are not going to get away with this behavior any longer. The night before last, we lay in that bed professing our love for one another. Last night I bared my soul to you. I told you everything. Now, Elizabeth, it is your turn to talk. You are going to tell me if we have a future together or not. This ship will not dock until I have an answer,” I demanded.

  She sat down on the bed, defeated, and looked down at her hands. She was quiet for several minutes and then looked up at me with tears in her eyes. “I do not know who you are,” she said.

  “What do you mean? I told you last night who I am,” I replied.

  “Yes, you did, but to me, Mr. Darcy and Max Sterling are two different people. There was a time when I had hoped to see Mr. Darcy again. I am not sure if I can say that I loved him, but I wanted to make his acquaintance again. And then I met Max Sterling and I did fall in love. I fell so hard that I was trying to figure out how to make loving a pirate work in my life. But after you revealed your true identity last night, I have felt nothing but loss.” Tears were falling from her eyes and it broke my heart to see her hurting so.

  I walked over to her and sat next to her on the bed. I put my arm around her and pulled her toward me. “Elizabeth, I am the same man you fell in love with. That will never change,” I said reassuringly.

  “There are some things I need to tell you,” she said as she snuggled into me. “I read your letter,” she added.

  “Well, I was hoping that you would,” I replied teasingly.

  “I went to Rosings to find you. I was wrong about you on so many levels. Yes, you were prideful, but I was, too. After you insulted me at the Meryton Assembly, I made a point to loathe you for all eternity.”

  I chuckled. “So you did hear me. I often wondered if you had. I saw you and Ms. Lucas and was sure that you had heard what I said. But you never said anything.”

  “This isn’t funny,” she admonished me.

  “And here I thought that you loved to laugh.”

  “Max, please. I am trying to tell you something important.”

  “Yes, my love. I will behave. Continue, please,” I replied.

  “You injured my pride and so you suddenly became someone that I did not want to like. You did not have a chance from the beginning.”

  “I hope you know that the comment that I made to Charles was not meant to insult you personally. I hope that my explanation from last night shows you how I truly avoided all single women, though Charles was encouraging me to dance the night away. I am sure you know by now that is not me and never will be,” I explained.

  “I do see that now, but I did not see that then. For that, I am truly sorry. I never gave you a chance. There were times during your visit to Hertfordshire that I really enjoyed your company. Our conversations over books and love were some of the best conversations of my memory. You always challenged me and nobody had ever done that before.”

  I would have given anything for her to stay snuggled against my chest, but she sat up and got up from the bed. She started pacing and continued, “Then Mr. Wickham came to town. For some reason, I believed everything he told me. I felt real empathy toward his situation and in my mind, you were the root of all his misfortunes. My prejudices against you from before would not allow me to see through Mr. Wickham. If I had, things may have ended up differently. After reading your letter, I looked back to my conversations with Mr. Wickham and I could see there were many instances with him that were insincere. I am ashamed of my behavior toward you in this regard.”

  She stopped pacing back and forth and looked at me. I started to get up and go to her, but she held out her hand to stop me. “Please, stay there and let me finish.” I nodded my head and sat back down.

  “In your letter, you displayed no remorse for your actions toward my sister and Mr. Bingley. But I did find it coincidental that Mr. Bingley returned to Netherfield not long after I returned home from Kent. His proposal came swiftly thereafter. I knew you had a hand in it and wanted so desperately to see you. You deserved my thanks and gratitude.”

  “But I never wanted that. All I ever wanted was your love,” I replied.

  “I know. But you still deserved it. I had hoped that you would be at the wedding. When you were not, I had hoped that you would come visit Jane and my new brother. But you did not. It was as if you had disappeared. Of course, I know now that is exactly what you did. If you would have returned, you could have saved us both some heartache.”

  “I did not know,” I said sadly. “Perhaps I should have gone back and tried to talk to you one more time.” I shrugged my shoulders and continued, “Elizabeth, it is far too late to think about what might have been. We have been offered a second chance and what matters is the here and now.”

  “I know. But there is more that you need to know.” She paused and then continued. “I waited for your return for a year. I even tried to find you in London when I would visit with Jane and Charles. Nobody knew what had happened to you. And then I met Bash.”

  “Did you love him?” I asked, suddenly feeling jealous. I knew it was inappropriate to ask, but I had to know. Had she shared with him the same passion that she and I had shared?

  “I did love him, Max, and I do not regret him. If I had not married him and built a life with him, I would not have my sweet Thomas,” she replied.

  I looked down at the floor and said, “I knew him. I knew Sebastian.”

  “You knew him?”

  “I did. We were only casual acquaintances. We went to Cambridge together.”

  “He never mentioned you. But if you were only casual acquaintances, I guess that would explain it.” She was quiet briefly as if in deep thought. Was it our acquaintance that bothered her or was she just missing her first husband? I wanted to ask, but thought it best to just let her continue. After a minute or two, she finally spoke again. “Before we made love the other night, I pondered how on earth a relationship with a pirate could work, considering the social circles that I am now in because of Bash. I struggled, but I finally gave in to my desires. It may not have been the smartest thing for me to do, but I can honestly say that I do not regret one minute with you. Not one.”

  “Why do I feel that there is a ‘but’ coming?” I asked.

  “Do you not see? I did to you the same thing that you did to me when you proposed to me eleven years ago! I struggled against my feelings for you because of my station and my social standing.”

  “I see.” I did not know what else to say to that, and I thought it best to just let her finish. I could tell there was more that she wanted to say.

  “I understand now. Your approach and manner were reprehensible, but I now understand the struggles that you faced all those years ago. I am sorry for judging you so harshly.”

  “May I ask you something?” I asked.

  “Yes,” she replied.

  “Where does that leave us now? Where do we go from here? I will be honest with you—now that you have been an intimate part of my life, I know without a doubt that I cannot live without you. I want to be a husband to you and I want to be a father to Thomas.”

  “I would like that too, but it is not that simple,” she said.

  As I was getting ready to argue with her, there came a knock on my cabin door. “Yes?” I answered.

  The door opened and Smead walked in with Thomas. He said, “Captain, we are home. The Absolution is pulling up to the dock now, sir.”

  Just a few more minutes, please, I pleaded to myself. Fate was playing a cruel joke on me. She had brought us together, we had fallen in love, and now she was taking it away. All I needed was a few more minutes with Elizabeth, but I had to return to the deck while the ship docked. I turned back toward Elizabeth and said, “We are not done here. I have responsibilities on deck to which I must attend. You and Thomas must prepare to disembark. I will have you taken to my estate on the island. There you will find your father
and ladies. I will be there shortly, once I get things handled here with the ship.”

  “So we are still your captives?” she asked with ire in her voice.

  We have just taken two steps forward, let us not go back. “No, Elizabeth, you are not. You are free to leave whenever you like. But I am asking you … no, I am pleading with you to stay. Please, at least until we finish this conversation. Give us this one chance,” I pleaded.

  She smiled. “Very well, then. I shall see you later.” She looked at me lovingly and then turned toward Thomas and said, “Come on, sweetheart, let us get ready to go see your grandfather.” Elizabeth and Thomas proceeded out of the room, with Smead and me following close behind.

  Chapter 20

  Elizabeth

  Thomas and I returned to our cabin to prepare to leave the ship. I could not believe that we had made it to our destination and that we would be leaving the Absolution. As much as I was looking forward to seeing my father again, the thought of leaving made me sad. Leaving the Absolution meant leaving Max. And although my head was telling me that was the way it was supposed to be, my heart was telling me something entirely different.

  I need to return to England. Thomas needs to return and follow in his father’s footsteps. As much as I would love to throw caution to the wind and live on Nassau with Max forever, I know I cannot.

  Thomas and I had just finished getting our things in order when we heard a knock on the door. “Come in,” I replied.

  The door opened slowly and my heart skipped a beat thinking that it was Max. But to my disappointment, it was Smead. “Your Grace, I ‘ave been told to escort you and yer young man to the captn’s house. Are ye ready to be leav’n?” he asked.

  “We are, Smead, but what about our belongings?” I asked.

  “Aye, the captn’ ‘as ordered some of the crew to be takn’ yer things to his house.”

  “Very well.” I turned to Thomas and held out my hand for him to take. I said, “Let us go, then.”

  We got up on deck and I desperately looked for Max, but I could not find him. I was sure he was busy, and I knew that I would be seeing him later, but I still wanted to thank him and his crew for their hospitality before we left the ship. Unfortunately, it did not appear that I was going to get that opportunity; Smead was already at the gangway and was anxiously waiting for us to follow.

  I glanced around the ship one last time, savoring every moment that Max and I had shared in my memory, and then turned to leave. We will talk tonight.

  There was a carriage awaiting us at the end of the dock. Once inside, we were quickly whisked away. I watched as we moved quickly through town. The streets were busy, which made me curious as to the local time. Palm trees were scattered here and there and the light breeze smelled of salt and fish. The air was balmy and warm, which was very different from what I was used to in England.

  The carriage continued out of the city to the island’s countryside. It was breathtaking—it seemed like I had just arrived in paradise. We continued on until we came to a small hill. As the carriage climbed the hill, I began to become anxious about what would greet us on the other side.

  Near the top of the hill and off to the right was the most beautiful and colorful home I had ever seen. The house stood two levels high and was pale yellow in color. The upper level had a veranda across its northern side and the lower level had a similar veranda that stretched across its northern side but then continued to wrap around to the eastern side of the house as well.

  When we turned down the drive of said house, I realized that we must be at Max’s home. I had heard that there was no home to match Pemberley and had seen it myself, but I believed that the house I was approaching was truly the one without equal. As we approached, I saw a sign that read Pemberley’s Paradise.

  How appropriate, I thought. It was very difficult to think of Max as Mr. Darcy, but when I saw things such as that sign I was reminded that they were one in the same. Unfortunately for Mr. Darcy, it was Max who I had fallen in love with.

  Upon our arrival, a woman with kind eyes greeted us. She wore a simple frock with a white apron and had her grey hair pinned up off her face. I assumed she was some form of housekeeper.

  “Your Grace, it is an honor to have you stompin’ with us,” she said sweetly. “I am Maggie, Maggie Malone, the captn’s housekeeper. It is a pleasure to know ya, Your Grace.”

  “The pleasure is mine, Mrs. Malone.” I detected a hint of an accent in her voice—that, combined with the name Malone, made me assume she was of Irish descent.

  “Please, madam, call me Maggie. Everyone does and if you called me Mrs. Malone, I am not sure I could guarantee I would answer ya.” She paused briefly and bent over toward Thomas. “I be guessing this here gentleman is our young Duke Thomas,” she added.

  “Hello, Maggie. Yes, I am Duke Thomas Wellesley. You can call me Thomas,” my son replied. I could not help but chuckle at him, he was so eager to make her acquaintance and so jovial in his delivery.

  “You are a right handsome young man. Your grandfather did not lie. He has told me all about you and your mama.” She looked up at me and smiled. Then she added, “Well, let us get you all settled. Miss Georgiana has gone to town for some shopping. Your father is in the study reading and I believe that your ladies are walking about the grounds,” she said.

  “Maggie, how did you know we were coming?” I asked. “We just docked a little over an hour ago.”

  “Well, Your Grace, we have quite a view from the back of the house. We always know when the Absolution makes its way home. I knew all about you and your son from your father and I knew that you would be arriving with the captain.” She paused for a moment and then added, “Come now, let us get you inside.”

  “How is my father?” I asked curiously.

  “Just grand, Your Grace. I have really enjoyed his company over the last few days.”

  “Please, call me Elizabeth. So my father has been here for a few days?” I asked.

  “Yes, the Amity docked just a few days ago. We had expected the Absolution to come in not long after, but then when you did not, we figured that you all got caught up in the storm that hit the island. I be guessing that it threw you all a bit off course.”

  “It must have. Max—I mean, Captain Sterling—did not say one way or the other, so I do not know for sure.” She looked at me curiously, as if she knew everything that had transpired between the captain and me. I knew it was impossible for her to know such things. Am I that transparent?

  We walked into the house and found the inside to be just as beautiful as I imagined. I had heard a lot about American plantations and that is exactly what this home reminded me of. I knew that many Americans had settled in the islands over the years since the War of Independence, so I expected their style to show through.

  Maggie led me straight to the study. Upon entering, I could see my father deeply engrossed in a book. He looked so content and peaceful. I do not know why that surprised me at all, but it did. I had my father’s same love of books so I fully understood how he could find peace in this room. I stood there for a moment, just watching him. I could see that he was well. In fact, it seemed like the sea air had done him some good. Eventually he looked up from his reading spectacles and his eyes widened.

  “Lizzie, dearest! You have arrived! It is so good to see you,” he said.

  I ran to him and dropped to my knees at his chair. My arms enveloped his waist and I hugged him ever so tightly. I was extremely thankful that he was alive and well. Even though I was a grown woman, nothing compared to the hugs of my father.

  “Grandfather!” Thomas cried as he came running in the room.

  “Thomas!” my father cried, returning Thomas’ excitement.

  I quickly got out of the way as grandfather and grandson greeted each other. It warmed my heart that we were all finally back together. Suddenly, I became saddened again. We could make a living here. It was obvious that father liked it here; I had never seen so much color in
his face. Thomas loved Max and he wanted us to stay. I loved Max and I wanted to stay. Max loved us all and wanted us to stay. But it was a dream. It was a dream because it could never happen. Because of Thomas’ title, we had to return to England. We had obligations that we could not ignore.

  We will talk tonight.

  “Lizzie?”

  “Lizzie?” my father repeated. I was so lost in thought that it took me a minute to respond.

  “I am so sorry, Papa. What it is?” I asked.

  “You were lost in another world, my daughter,” he said.

  “Well, in a manner of speaking, I was,” I said sadly.

  “Talk to me. Tell me what has happened that has made you so melancholy.”

  I could never resist my father. He was the easiest person on Earth to talk to. I turned toward Thomas and said, “Why do you not ask Miss Maggie to show you around? Perhaps if Mrs. Kelly has returned you could go and find her.”

  “Mama, why do you not just say that you want a private word with Grandfather? I would understand,” he said smartly.

  I shook my head. My son had matured beyond his years. “You are right, I should be honest with you. Yes, I would like a private word with your grandfather.”

  “Okay, Mama. I will go find something to occupy me.” Before I could say a word, he added, “And I promise to stay out of trouble and I will be careful.” I just shook my head as Thomas left the study.

  My father grabbed my hand and said, “Lizzie, what is it?”

  “Oh, Papa!” I began to cry. All the emotion of the last couple of days had finally let loose and I became a sobbing mess in front of my father. He put his arms around me and I sobbed until I could not cry any longer.

  As I was getting myself together, bringing my breathing in check and banishing the hiccups, my father said, “Now, tell me.”

  “Papa, I have gotten myself into a horrible mess,” I said.

  “A mess?” he asked. He said, “How in the world could you get yourself into such a mess on a ship with Mr. Darcy?”

  I stared at him in shock. “Did you say Mr. Darcy?” I asked and he nodded in reply. “You knew? All this time I was on that ship, you knew he was Mr. Darcy?” I said, astonished.