Lost in Love: A Contemporary Christian Romance (Modern Conveniences Book 3)

by Leah Atwood

  “They don’t mind you getting married for reasons other than love?” She joined him on the rail.

  “I wouldn’t say they are thrilled about it, but they liked the idea of it better than they do a rebound relationship.”

  She grimaced. “I’m not sure that’s much of a relief.”

  “My parents can be overbearing, but their intentions are good.” He offered a smile. “Besides, they never thought I’d settle down, so they’ll take a daughter-in-law any way they can get one.”

  A shaky laugh came from her. “That’s a little better. In the interest of full disclosure, I should tell you my dad and sister aren’t thrilled either, but they’ve had longer to come to terms with it. I was upfront with them about Kristopher.”

  “Do you want to have a reception?”

  “No.” His face must have shown his surprise at her brisk response, because she hurried to clarify. “There’s only going to be a few of us, and I’d feel ridiculous having one with less people than I have toes.”

  He couldn’t stop his chuckle. “That’s an interesting way to put it.”

  “Sorry. My toes are cramped in these boots, so I guess I subconsciously had them on my mind.” A blush crept up her neck. “Or I should have just told you it was the first thing to come to my mind.”

  “Honesty is a rare virtue.” He glanced at her shoes, which were a cute, pointy number with a heel that halfway closed their height gap when standing. “Did you love Kristopher?”

  She’d been starting at the stream, but jerked her gaze back to him. “Is that why you brought up honesty?”

  “No, I wasn’t even thinking about that, but was curious.”

  “The honest answer is no. We talked for six months before he came to meet me in person, but I never felt a connection with him.” Her finger curled over the wooden post’s edge. “Whether that’s because I hadn’t met him in person until a week ago, or because there wasn’t meant to be a spark, I don’t know—but I can say without any doubt that I never loved him.”

  “Ever been in love?” He didn’t know why it mattered, other than he didn’t want a wife who carried a torch for someone else. Even if their marriage wasn’t one of love.

  “No.” She looked him in the eyes. “Do you still love Madison?”

  He sighed. “That answer is complicated.”

  “It shouldn’t be.” A crestfallen expression dampened her features. “It’s a yes or no question.”

  Letting loose a long sigh, he ran a hand through his hair. It was only fair that he answered, but… “Madison was my best friend for over twenty years. She holds a piece of my heart because we’ve shared such a large portion of our lives. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t still love her, but it’s like the love for a friend.”

  “Was that so difficult?” Sadness lurked behind her smile.

  Yes, it was. How could he explain to her the void left by Madison’s absence in his life, how he longed to pick up the phone and tell her the latest in his life. He’d come to terms with losing her, but not with the consequences. Would he ever?

  He desperately needed a change of subject. “Did you receive any clarification from the attorney regarding the length of marriage?”

  The Monday after their engagement, Sunny had called the probate attorney to verify any details before they delved any further into their planning. To their surprise, Aunt Mitzy had hidden a clause in the will that required Sunny to be married on the one-year anniversary of taking ownership.

  “He said there’s no loophole—no way around that stipulation.”

  “You didn’t check when you planned to marry Kristopher?” He hadn’t meant to sound accusatory, but the scowl she shot him said otherwise.

  “We’d planned to make it a real marriage eventually, so it never seemed necessary to ask.”

  “I didn’t mean to offend you. I was just curious.” He gave her puppy-dog eyes, trying to break up the seriousness.

  “I’m defensive about that whole situation.” Her shoulders shuddered. “Every time I think about him, I can’t believe how dumb I was.”

  “Hey now, we’ve been through this. Lots of men are manipulative, and you were duped.” He took advantage of their proximity and touched her arm briefly. “You can’t blame yourself.”

  “I know, and I’m trying.” Her mouth opened, then closed. Opened again. “There is one thing I should tell you. The clause only says I have to be married by March thirty-first, and be married on the one-year anniversary of ownership. There’s nothing that says I have to be married to the same man.”

  “What are you saying?” His chest shouldn’t have tightened like it had. They had a business arrangement that was all. Actually, he wasn’t gaining anything by helping her except the satisfaction of doing a good deed.

  “I just thought I’d let you know there was an out if you wanted it.”

  “I finish what I start.” Sliding off the railing, he counted to ten and turned his back to her. Why did it bother him that she thought he’d want out of their agreement? Even earlier in the week, when they’d first learned about the year requirement, he hadn’t blanched.

  He always followed through. It was one of the reasons he’d experienced success with his business. When others backed out, he remained. Tenacity and perseverance paid off—he believed that down to his core. It’s why he’d finished out all his contracts before taking his extended leave, even if it had taken nearly a year to do so.

  The wooden planks of the bridge thrummed behind him, and he felt Sunny’s presence behind him.

  Her hand cupped his shoulder. “I’m sorry. We keep offending each other today without meaning to. I only mentioned it because I know how much I’m asking of you.”

  In slow motion he turned around, his heartstrings pulled by the stress creases on her forehead. “We’ll stick it out together, all right?”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.” His shoulder was still warm from where she’d touched him. “I’ll have to go back to work at some point, once I figure out what God wants me to do, but I’m here for the duration, even if I have to leave for short periods of time.”

  She swallowed, then licked her lips. Stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. “Thank you. There’s no way I could properly express how much this means to me, but know that I appreciate you.”

  He stood speechless. She appreciated him. Not what he was doing for her, but him. The words wrapped his wounded soul with a peaceful balm.

  And then the kiss—a completely innocent kiss that sent crazy thoughts racing through his mind. Completely insane thoughts he shouldn’t be having, not under their circumstances, and not after a week’s acquaintance.

  Thoughts of forever.

  Chapter Five

  The faint thump of a knock on the front door confused Sunny. Who was it, and why hadn’t they used the doorbell? She wasn’t expecting anyone—those closest to her, meaning Dad and Sean, were to meet her at the bridge in several hours for her wedding.

  She secured her earring and ran down two flights of stairs. After peeking through the peephole, she threw the door open to greet her guest. “Raina! What are you doing here?”

  Her sister stepped into the house and engulfed her in a tight hug. “I couldn’t miss my baby sister’s wedding.”

  “I can’t believe you’re here.” Blinking rapidly, she tried to save her mascara. “It wouldn’t have been the same without you.”

  “James surprised me with a ticket home and told me I had to come.” Raina laughed and stepped inside. “I guess my moping around for two days got the better of him.”

  “Sensible James bought a last minute plane ticket?” That didn’t sound anything like her brother-in-law who pinched every penny and was as practical as they came. She’d always thought him boring, but he made her sister happy, and that’s what mattered.

  “He has his moments.” Love for her husband filled Raina’s smile. “Actually, this move has changed him. His work environment is more laid back than at his
last office, and even though he has more responsibility, he’s less stressed, and more relaxed.”

  “That’s great.”

  “It is, but I’m not here to talk about James.” Clasping Sunny’s elbow, Raina dragged her into the parlor where they could sit for a few minutes. “Tell me about Sean.”

  They sat on a love seat, which had recently been reupholstered to reflect the home’s original era. Aunt Mitzy had been in the process of having all the parlor furniture redone when she passed, and Sunny had finished the job.

  “You’ll like him.” At least I hope you will. “He’s a successful businessman, but taking time off for the time being.”

  “Being successful at his career doesn’t automatically qualify him as good husband material.” In typical Raina fashion, she’d made the statement matter-of-factly.

  Had Sunny not known her sister so well, she would have taken it as a criticism, but she knew her sister was concerned for her. “No, but he is a good person as well. He didn’t hesitate to defend me against Kristopher. I really believe he would have forcibly removed him if Kristopher hadn’t left when he did.”

  “Is Sean a Christian?”

  “Yes.” Sunny thought of all the conversations they’d had over the last couple of weeks. He never hid his past—nothing shocking, but not a straight and narrow path—and spoke often of his renewed faith. “Unlike Kristopher, I know his relationship with Christ is true, not empty words.”

  Raina’s expression turned serious. “Can I ask a question?”

  Sunny braced herself. People didn’t ask permission to ask a question unless there was potential for offense or drama. “Go ahead.”

  “How can you be sure of a marriage to a virtual stranger, especially after what happened with Kristopher?” Raina held up a hand, palm out. “Before you get mad, please don’t think I’m criticizing your decision, but I want to understand.”

  “I’ve prayed about it, and I have peace.” She scratched her chin, reflecting on the entire process. “With Kristopher, I never had that.” At Raina’s arched brow, she explained further. “I said I did, but I had doubts all along, only I didn’t recognize them for what they were.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I passed them off as typical nervousness—pretty likely in such an unusual situation.”

  “And you don’t have any doubts about marrying Sean?” Hands crossed in her lap, Raina watched her for an answer.

  “No. None at all.” A smile tugged at her. “I believe God placed him in my life at exactly the time I needed him. Once you meet him, you’ll understand. He’s charming and sweet, confident but not arrogant. Intelligent, but willing to admit his mistakes. He's one of those rare people who’s just a genuinely nice guy.”

  Raina grinned. “That’s what I wanted to hear, passion in your voice when you talked about him.”

  Heat suffused her cheeks. She hadn’t meant to be overly enthusiastic about singing Sean’s praises. Although she couldn’t bring herself to admit it to anyone, she’d developed a crush on the man she would marry in a few hours. What a strange thought. She didn’t know what the future held, but she prayed it wasn’t heartbreak.

  There wasn’t time to deliberate on her feeling for Sean. She had a wedding to prepare for.

  She rose to her feet. “Help me finish getting ready?”

  “You bet.” Raina jumped up and followed her to the third-story living quarters.

  Sunny loved her bedroom at Crosswinds. Large and spacious, it had a separate sitting room off the far end, with a window giving view to the backyard. A branch from an oak extended to the window, and Sunny loved watching the squirrels scamper back and forth on the limb.

  The original home didn’t have a closet, but one of the previous owners had walled off three feet of the room to create a room-wide walk-in closet. Even with all seasons of clothing hung and folded on shelves, she didn’t even fill one third of the space. Part of the closet she used for storage, but the middle stayed empty.

  She went in to retrieve the dress she’d bought. The price tag was heftier than she’d anticipated, but she’d fallen in love with the gown. She justified the expense by telling herself this was a special day, even if not a normal marriage. Even without love, there was occasion to celebrate.

  “Hold this please and keep your eyes closed while I unzip.” She handed the garment bag to Raina, and unfastened the zipper. Slipped the dress from the hanger and held it up. She wanted to see Raina’s reaction. “Open your eyes.”

  “Oh, Sunny, it’s gorgeous.” Raina ran a hand over the lace shoulders that led to a V-neck bodice.

  “I tried this one on first and didn’t bother with any others.” She giggled. “The attendant told me I was the easiest bride she’d ever worked with.”

  “If she remembered me, I’m surprised she didn’t run when she saw you.”

  “What was the final count before you decided on one?”

  Raina ducked her chin and blushed. “Seventy-six.”

  “You were a beautiful bride though. All that effort paid off.”

  “Thank you.” Raina took the dress from her hands. “You’ll be an even prettier bride. Let’s get you ready. What did you plan for your hair?”

  She gasped, surprised at her own forgetfulness. “I didn’t even think about my hair.”

  “Don’t worry about it.” Raina gave her an assuring smile. “That’s what big sisters are for.”

  “Did I tell you how grateful I am you’re here?”

  ***

  Sunny sat in the passenger seat of Raina’s rental car, her gown carefully draped around her. Because of the wedding’s location, she had no choice except to wear the dress in the vehicle. Her hands gripped her bouquet of yellow daffodils—when she told the sales lady her original plan of roses to match the bridge, the lady had suggested a complimentary color instead to tie in the natural surroundings. Having no experience with weddings other than Raina’s, she readily agreed.

  As she stared at the flowers she gripped, she decided she’d made the right decision. On an unseasonably warm March day, with a cloudless sky and bright sun shining, the daffodils added to the cheerful ambiance. Maybe she should have snuck in a few stalks of lavender to casually sniff and calm her nerves.

  “Are you going to get out?” Raina sat in the driver’s seat, staring at her.

  How long had they been parked? Too many thoughts fought for space in her brain, and her mind shut down. “What am I supposed to do? I forgot what Sean and I planned for my entrance. Why can’t I remember?”

  “Everything is fine. You’re a nervous bride. Take a deep breath.”

  She glanced up to see her dad striding toward the car. The familiar sight of him thwarted her near panic attack and refocused her brain. “Dad’s going to walk me down the aisle, which is really one end of the bridge to the other. Sean will be waiting for me, along with Pastor Bentley on the far side.”

  Raina covered her hand with hers. “Are you positive this is what you want to do?”

  Drawing in a long breath, she closed her eyes, then exhaled. “Yes.”

  “Then I wish you the happiest of marriages and may love find you.”

  Sunny faltered at her sister’s statement. Love find me? Hadn’t Sean said his best friend had fallen in love with the man she’d married for convenience? Was it possible? A longing inside of her pushed forward—the dream for a husband to love her and a house full of children and laughter.

  She’d been willing to settle with Kristopher, but something told her she couldn’t with Sean. With him it would be all or nothing. Which meant she’d have to guard her heart.

  Dad knocked on the window, and she opened the door.

  “You are beautiful.” His eyes misted. “You look so much like your mama.”

  “Thank you.” Her throat closed, making speaking difficult.

  Raina exited the driver’s side and circled. “I’ll go find where they want me and give you two a minute alone.”

  After she left,
Dad helped her out of the car.

  She looked at him, the man who had been her first love. He’d been everything a dad should be—loving, kind, patient. Through his example in how he’d treated her mom, she learned how a husband should act toward his wife and how a man showed respect for women. He’d been her rock and foundation through life, and she had been Daddy’s little girl from the time she could remember.

  Gray hair peppered his dark hair, which Raina had inherited, and several creases had found permanent spots near his eyes. He had aged since Mom had died, but most would still consider him a handsome man. In his mid-fifties, there was no reason he couldn’t remarry. No one could replace Mom, but she wanted her dad happy, not lonely.

  He cleared his throat. “I have something for you.”

  “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

  His Adam’s apple bobbed as he pulled a small box out of his pocket. He removed a thin silver chain with a heart locket attached. “Your mom wanted you to have this on your wedding day.” Watery eyes and a choked voice made him pause for a few moments. “When she got sick, she knew she wouldn’t be here to see you walk down the aisle on your big day, but didn’t want you to miss out on her presence.”

  With the chain draped over his hand, he used his thumb and forefinger to pop the locket’s mechanism. The heart opened, revealing a picture of her mom on one side, and a picture of her mom holding her as a baby on the other.

  There wasn’t a dam in creation that could have stopped her flood of tears. Dad handed her a tissue and she blotted them away as they subsided. “Will you put it on for me, please?”

  “It would be my honor.”

  Turning her back, she lifted her hair, careful not muss the curls Raina had painstakingly created. When the necklace was clasped, she faced her father again.

  “I know you’re determined to go through with the marriage, and I won’t try to change your mind. From what I’ve seen, Sean is a good man.” He rubbed a hand over his face, she suspected to wipe a stray tear. “No matter what happens, know you’ll always be my daughter, and I’ll always be your daddy.”