Surrendered: A Collection of Five Works

by Unknown

  “So, what do you do?” I asked back.

  “My job isn’t very exciting. I spend almost all of my time in the water surfing.” That explained why I saw him in the waves, why he seemed like he was a part of the water.

  “Surfing must be awesome,” I offered. “I wish I was coordinated enough to learn something like that.”

  He chuckled and I almost tripped in the sand the way his laugh slid into me.

  “I’m sure you can learn to surf, I’m a pretty good teacher.” The thought of his body, salty and wet, clinging to mine as he waded with me in the water was an image that I certainly didn’t mind. But I shook the thought away, needing desperately to focus on my running.

  “Trust me, I can’t be taught. You have no idea how much energy it’s taking just to stay upright while I’m running. I’m not exactly an athletic person.”

  His eyes roamed over me and he licked his lips which drove me wild instantly.

  “You look pretty athletic,” he said.

  This was a level of flirting that I didn’t know how to handle. The way his stare made my whole body feel as if it was on fire, the way his voice sent shock waves through me, the way I didn’t feel as if I was the only one feeling these things.

  My lack of athletic ability decided to take that moment to appear and I tripped and fell face first hard into the sand. Embarrassment washed over me like the waves and I didn’t want to ever get up again. I wanted to lay there and just let the water drown me so I would never have to face the unbelievably sexy man that just watched me eat sand. But instead of him running ahead of me, I felt a hand at my elbow pulling me upwards. “Are you ok?”

  I was simultaneously surprised at how electric he felt and how cold his hand was. It was such a weird thought that popped in my head that I couldn’t help but laugh at the entire situation. There is a gorgeous guy who keeps coming around me, someone who makes me feel something inside of me that I’ve never felt before, and all I could think about is how cold his hand was. Instead of him pulling me up, I ended up tugging on his hand to pull him down toward me and sat up in the sand. I had no idea what I was doing, I’d never been bold like this before but something in me couldn’t resist him. It didn’t matter if I looked like a fool or not, or if he wasn’t looking at me the same way I was looking at him, though something told me that wasn’t true.

  “You have sand on your face,” he whispered as his fingertips brushed over my cheeks. They lingered for a second too long and this time I didn’t think about how cold he was, instead all I could feel was how warm he made me.

  “Thank you,” I whispered. My eyes drifted shut as I enjoyed the feel, the calm, of his skin on mine. When I opened them again I could see him studying me, a question written across his face that I could see he didn’t know how to ask. We stayed like that, staring at each other for what felt like eternity, until a wave came and splashed us hard, soaking us both completely.

  Alex burst into laughter and I rubbed the water from my eyes and followed suit. His laugh was contagious, it felt like everything about him would be contagious, and I didn’t mind catching anything he would give me.

  “So, you’re a writer?” He finally asked me when his laughter bubbled down.

  “Yea, well, I’ve only written one book. It came out this year.”

  “Is it something I would know?”

  “Probably, I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging but it became pretty big. It’s a fantasy novel, The Onyx.” I told him.

  He looked off in the distance for a moment before telling me he hadn’t heard of it before. “Will you tell me about it?”

  This was something I knew how to do without a worry, talk about my book. It wasn’t that I liked to talk about myself, actually it was completely the opposite, I liked to avoid talking about myself and the best way to do that was to talk about something completely unreal. So my mouth started running about every detail, probably too many details, about my book and about my fantasy world. I could probably talk all day about my thoughts without even knowing I was boring someone to death, which I’ve done a number of times, so I’ve gotten fairly good at deciding when someone is completely bored with me. But watching Alex, he never seemed bored, not one bit. Instead of tuning me out or letting his eyes glaze over, his blue eyes stayed bright and trained on me, and he continually would ask me questions, spurring on my animated discussion.

  Then something happened that has never happened in my life, I ran out of magical things to talk about. Everyone I’d ever known had always cut me off before I got out all of my ideas and excitement. But not Alex. He let me prattle on until I had nothing left to say. It felt simultaneously liberating and slightly embarrassing.

  “Sorry I just rambled like that,” I offered. I was sure my cheeks were flaming red but for some reason it didn’t bother me. Maybe it was the way he looked at me, as if he was seeing everything inside of me. Or maybe it was because he hasn’t seemed bored to tears as I spoke. But whatever it was, my face was flaming from his direct attention, but not because I was embarrassed.

  “Don’t be sorry, I liked watching how excited you get about what you love. It’s like me and surfing. People just don’t understand the passion I have for it and sometimes I drive people crazy with how much I talk about it.”

  “How could you drive anyone crazy?” I blurted out.

  He chuckled a low rumble that nearly drove me insane. “What does that mean?”

  Now my face was flaming from pure embarrassment. “I just mean that you’re so….so….your eyes….”

  Oh God, what was I saying? I was not only sounding like a total obsessed weirdo but I was also probably making him super uncomfortable. He probably was just trying to be nice, a guy like him had to have a girlfriend, and I was just making a total fool of myself. I dropped my head in my hands trying to think of exactly how fast I could get up and run back to my cottage, lock the door, and forget everything that was happening to me.

  Fingertips brushed through my hair and I looked over to him. He wasn’t smiling which was unusual for him. Instead his eyes were focused intently on me and I couldn’t look away.

  “There’s something about you,” he said. “I don’t know what it is but something that draws me to you and I can’t look away.”

  This time I didn’t blush. I’d never had a guy ever talk to me like that before and I didn’t want to miss the moment by my own embarrassment. I took in the moment, watching him with just as much intensity because he was right without even knowing it. Something was drawing me to him as well, something that made me feel as if there were an invisible string keeping us attached. I’d never felt connected to anyone like that before and whatever that feeling was, the feeling that made me melt inside and the one that made me feel like I could just be me, was something I didn’t want to lose.

  Chapter 3

  I didn’t return back to my cottage until the afternoon, where I promptly took a shower and tried to clear my head. We ended up talk for hours in the surf. He told me about his passion for the water and I told him that no one had ever really wanted to hear about my crazy thoughts before. I don’t know why it was so easy for me to open up to him the way I did, or why I could spend hours doing it, but I’d been right, there was something about him, something that was unlike anyone else I’d ever known and I didn’t want to hide from it.

  But at the same time that I didn’t want to hide from whatever was happening, I still needed to do my work. So reluctantly I had left him on the beach while I went back to my cottage to get myself ready for the day. Once I was dressed in shorts and a loose tank top, I took my lap top outside to the patio again and turned it on. I reread all my notes and work from the day before and contemplated where I should go from there. My fingers started to tap wildly at the keys and the story started to pour out of me. But unlike when I wrote my first one, when not even a volcano erupting would have taken my head up from the screen where I was working, my eyes kept traveling away from the screen and watching the beach inst
ead. Looking up and down and even in the water, I caught myself wanting to see Alex. I was hoping to see his body, his smile, and feel his intense presence around me.

  I was effectively driving myself crazy with how little focus I had so I took myself and my story back inside where I couldn’t possibly keep watching for him. That did the trick, sort of, and I was able to draft a few chapters, thought the story wasn’t exactly going where I had thought it was. Where I’d planned for it to be purely an adventure story into the deep forests with more mythical creatures, there was something new unfolding inside of the pages. It was turning into a love story right in front of me. I’d never been one to read romance novels and the only attempt at writing I’d ever done was very far from a love story. So where was this coming from?

  When I finally felt finished for the day, it was night and I needed some air, at least that was the excuse I was telling myself. Standing up from the soft couch I stretched my tight muscles. From sitting all day long after the run I’d had on the beach, my body was begging to move a bit. There was the possibility that I was also restless from trying to keep myself from seeing Alex, but I tried to ignore that extremely plausible possibility. Instead I walked out to my deck and took the steps down toward the beach where the sand had cooled from the loss of the summer sun. I felt it squish between my toes and I relished the feel, it had an immediate calming effect on my body which felt twisted into knots.

  I wished it was my story, which wasn’t turning out at all like I was hoping and was feeling more like garbage by the minute, that was making me feel all twisted and jittery, but it wasn’t. It was Alex. I didn’t even understand how that would be possible. Yes, it was true that he’d made me open up more around him, let me feel like I wasn’t some crazy loser girl, than anyone else had, even my friends. And yea, I loved the way he talked about surfing, as if the sun were actually in his eyes lightening them up for the world, but that didn’t mean I could actually have feeling for this mystery guy could it?

  I had a few fleeting crushes in my life, but I’d never left a date and couldn’t stop thinking about them. Usually I was more than happy to retreat back to the pages of my book that I was reading, or most recently writing. But the desire to see Alex was very real, no matter how much I was trying to deny it. That thought was trouble though, it’s not as if seeing Alex was ever going to get me anywhere. I lived nowhere near the beach and his life was the beach…I had to stop my thoughts in my tracks. What in the world was I doing? I was actually thinking about him as if a relationship were ever going to take place. I needed to walk, I needed to clear this fog he’d inserted in my mind.

  I walked down to the water and let the cool waves wash over my toes. It occurred to me that I hadn’t swam in the water yet and I had the strong desire to do so right in that moment. It was dark and there were no lifeguards but the water was so calm, like glass in its perfection that I needed to use it to calm my racing mind. Stripping off my clothes, I left them in a pile in the sand and quickly let the water surround me wearing only my bra and underwear. My arms slicing through the water felt so refreshing, so natural, that I kicked and pushed through, relishing the feel that it was having on my mind and body.

  I dipped my face under the water and let the salty sting wash down my cheeks. Rubbing the water from my eyes I opened them to the sight of a wave crashing down on top of me. I had mere moments to pull air into my lungs before I felt the water hit me and drag me down into the darkness. Immediately I wanted to scream for help, to call out for anyone that might hear me, but I knew I had to keep in as much air as possible. I kicked and pushed with every bit of strength that I had and I broke through to the surface. Relief was brief as I felt the undertow pull at me and drag me back under so quickly that I didn’t have time to get another breath of air in.

  I was under the water, being pulled by a force that was far stronger than me and I didn’t know how I’d beat it. My body was exhausted from the fight and my lungs were on fire. Both my arms and my legs had turned to jelly and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to keep up my fight much longer. The thought of drowning was terrifying but I didn’t have any more strength, any more fight. I could feel my body sagging and I knew it wouldn’t be long. But just when I thought that there was no hope left for me, I felt something strong wrap around my waist and pull me hard.

  With the state my oxygen-deprived mind was in, there was no way for me to know which direction I was being pulled but I just had to hope it was upward, toward air, toward life. Suddenly I burst up from the water and I gasped for air. My body knew it should be swimming and kicking, trying to get myself out of the water but I couldn’t find any strength left. Luckily, whatever it was that pulled me from my death was also pulling me toward shore. Fleetingly I attempted to kick but it was useless.

  “Shhh…I’ve got you. Just breathe.” His voice rumbled through me as he held me tightly and my entire being relaxed immediately when I recognized my hero.

  I wanted to say something but I was still coughing far too much for words to come out. Instead I took his advice and let him drag me to shore while I focused on returning air to my body. Before I realized it we were at the edge of the water and he scooped me up into his arms, not even letting me walk toward the sand. He didn’t put me down again until he had me safely in the patio chair at my cottage. I sat there shivering, less from cold and more from fright, while he wordlessly opened the door and walked inside.

  My mind was too clouded and coming down from fear to even wonder what he was doing, but soon I heard his footsteps as he emerged again. Warmth wrapped around my shoulders as he wrapped a big beach towel around me and laid another one across my lap. I probably should have been slightly embarrassed that he had found me not only drowning but also in my underwear but at that moment embarrassment was the farthest thing from my mind.

  “How did you know I was out there?” I winced at my own question realizing too late that thank you would have been the proper first thing to say. “I mean, thank you, I can’t thank you enough for saving my life, but I didn’t see you out there earlier?”

  The light of the moon illuminated him and I saw him avert his eyes away and almost look a little embarrassed himself.

  “I was swimming, well really just floating, in the water and I saw you start to swim out. I probably should have let you know I was there, you just looked so beautiful and peaceful in the water that I didn’t want to disturb you.”

  The chair squeaked as he sat down next to me, neither one of us looking at each other. “You really thought I looked beautiful?” Again I winced at my own words, I knew I must have sounded ridiculous. Here this guy that I can’t stop thinking about saves me from dying and I’m more concerned that he thought I was beautiful than I am about him saving my life. Dropping my head into my hands, I let my hair make a curtain around me so that I could hide my embarrassment even just a little.

  But I felt a weight on top of my knee and peaked to see what it was. His hand rested on the towel on top of my knee.

  “You looked amazing,” he whispered.

  I had no words, nothing I could possibly say. No one had ever told me that before and I had to stifle a laugh from bubbling up. He must have sensed my laughter because he immediately removed his hand and stood up.

  “Well, I’m glad you’re ok.” He ran his fingers through his wet hair. “I should probably go.”

  He took a couple of steps toward the stairs and panic struck me. I didn’t want him to go. If it was my choice I’d stay up with him all night while his presence kept me feeling safe and warm. I tried to stand but my legs wobbled and I started to fall, right into his chest.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I seem to keep falling.” I could feel the smooth marble of his muscles under my fingertips, and I could see the bow of his lips and in that moment I wanted nothing more than to find out what he tasted like.

  “I’m glad I’m the one who can keep helping you back up,” he whispered to me. My whole body turned to jelly and it wasn’
t from my near death experience. I looked deep into his eyes, and felt something inside of me turn. I didn’t want to be this girl who couldn’t get dates simply because I was too much me, I wanted to be the girl who snagged a gorgeous guy like Alex Hammill because I was me. I may not have had a lot of practice at all of this, but I didn’t want that to stop me. Who cared that I’d only known him for a matter of days?

  In just those few days I’d met the best looking guy I’d ever seen, who genuinely seemed interested in me, who saved my life and then called me beautiful. I would have to be a fool to not enjoy it while I had it. So that’s what I was going to do. It was time for me to be brave and throw away my fears of not being wanted. It only took one person in the whole world to want someone, and if it only lasted a week, well than at least I’d had it for a brief time in my life, and I could say I lived every second of it.

  “How can I thank you for being the one who keeps helping me up?” I asked.

  He smiled down at me. “There’s no need to thank me, it’s my pleasure to save someone as beautiful and unique as you.”

  My heart thudded at his words, unable to comprehend that he was actually saying them to me. “Can I cook you dinner? I’m not much of a cook and I’m not….”

  He put a finger on my lips to silence the rest of my thoughts about everything that I’m not. “I’d love to have dinner with you.”

  I smiled and watched his eyes. I’d noticed how much light they’d held, how unbelievable blue they were, but I hadn’t been so close as to notice the tiny flecks of gold that made them sparkle. It made me wonder, if I continued to get close to him, what other amazing things about him I might discover. He took his finger away from my lips and the pressure of where they’d been lingered.