“Can I watch a movie?” Emma questioned as she came pounding through the door.
“Sure, baby.” Jane’s voice sounded perfectly normal, whereas I was still fighting off the desire from earlier.
“How does Harry Potter sound?” She ruffled Emma’s curls and shooed the kid off to the living room to find the DVD. “You up for a movie night?” She gave me a hopeful smile, and my gut tightened.
“Absolutely.” My voice regained its usual strength. She took my hand and led me into the living room.
After getting Emma settled in her pajamas and the DVD set up, Jane turned down the lights.
“Can I have a snack with the movie?” Emma pleaded. I had to give it to the kid. With that smile, I’d give her anything she wanted.
“Let me go get something. I’ll be right back,” Jane said.
I gave Jane the look that I wanted to help, but seriously, this was so out of my comfort zone. I’d probably end up giving the kid a sugar coma with the snack I’d fix for her.
“Are you in love with my mom?” Emma whispered as soon as Jane was out of hearing distance. I rubbed my hand over my face, caught off guard by her candid question.
“What makes you think that?” I tried to dodge the kid.
“You were kissing her in the garage earlier. It was one of those in-love kisses like in the movies. Are you in love with my mommy?” She was looking up at me with those sharp baby blues, waiting for me to give her an answer.
“Would it bother you if I were?” I wasn’t sure Emma was the person I should be having this conversation with.
“I don’t think you should be kissing my mommy like that if you don’t love her.” This kid was definitely Jane’s daughter, that was for sure.
“I shouldn’t, should I?”
Emma made an excellent point. And although I loved her mommy, I didn’t know what the rules were for telling the kid before talking to the mother first.
“Well?” She turned that fiery stare on me again. “Are you?”
“I’ll tell you a secret.” I leaned in close to her. “I do.”
Emma’s eyes got big like saucers, and her lips curled up in a mischievous grin. “But how about you and I keep it a secret for now, okay? I haven’t told your mommy yet.”
Her grin grew even bigger.
“I won’t tell, pinkie promise.” She held out her pinkie finger to me in anticipation.
I paused, trying to remember the proper pinkie promise procedure.
“Curl your pinkie around mine.” She took my hand, curled my pinkie around hers, and shook our hands. “There, now we’ve made a pinkie promise, so I have to keep your secret forever.”
This kid was perfect!
“So what did I miss?” Jane dropped down on the sofa next to Emma after placing a plate of Oreos and a bowl of chips on the table.
“Nothing.” Emma grinned, giving me what I assumed was an attempted wink. “Can I sit in the corner? I want to put my feet on the pillow in the corner.”
Jane looked around flustered. “Okay.” She got up as Emma practically shoved her off the couch.
As she attempted to sit in between us, Emma spoke up again. “No, Mommy, I want to sit next to Jackson. You should sit on the other side, next to him.”
I shrugged, giving Jane my most apologetic smile. Turning over to Emma, I caught her attempting another wink my way. She sure was a sneaky kid. That strange feeling from before assaulted me. How could this girl I barely knew have such an effect on me?
Soon her head drooped, and she ended up resting it in my lap.
“I better get her to bed.” Jane attempted to pick her up, but I stopped her. “Let me.” I lifted her small body in my arms and was again reminded of how precious this girl was.
“Lead the way.” I urged Jane on, and followed her into Emma’s room. Jane pulled the blankets back, and after settling her on the bed, Jane tucked her in.
“She looks so peaceful,” I whispered as we walked out into the hallway.
“You should see her after a visit to my parents’, running on little sleep and lots of sugar. You might rethink that statement then.” Jane glanced down at her sleeping girl, full of love.
“Maybe not peaceful, but definitely still a princess.” That girl was slowly working her way into my heart, right alongside her momma.
“Thanks so much for your help today.” Jane led me back into the living room. “I’m sure this isn’t what you had in mind for your Saturday.”
“Honestly, I’m really sorry you got hurt. But I’m glad I got to be here. There’s no place I’d have rather been.” Truth.
Twelve Years Earlier
Gotta Get Thru This – Daniel Bedingfield
JACKSON
The phone ringing in the middle of the night woke me from a deep sleep. Between classes and work, I was dead to the world as soon as my head hit the pillow most nights. I had no idea what time it was or who was calling, just that I wasn’t happy someone was waking me from the precious little sleep I got in between school and shifts at the coffee shop.
I could kick myself for forgetting to switch the offending device off, but when the ringing about burned a hole in my head, I picked it up without checking the caller ID.
“What?” I almost shouted into the phone.
“Jacks…” I could barely make out Sarah’s voice on the other end of the line. She sounded like she’d been crying. All of a sudden, I was awake, reaching for my watch on the bedside table and rubbing the sleep from my eyes. It was 1:15 a.m., and it made no sense for her to be calling me at this hour.
“Hey, what’s the matter?”
“It’s Dad.” Her voice broke on the word Dad, and I could hear her sniffle. ”He was complaining about not feeling well all night, and then he collapsed. Mom called an ambulance, and they came and took him to the hospital.”
“Hey, calm down. It’s going to be okay,” I said. I didn’t know what was going on with Dad, but I felt like I needed to assure her.
“Jacks, Mom and I are at the hospital, and they’re running all of these tests. No one will tell us anything, and Mom is freaking out. I don’t know what to do.” She started sobbing.
Dread and fear settled all around me, making my feet feel like they were slipping in quicksand. But my mind kicked into gear, telling me I needed to come up with a plan and take control of this situation. I needed to be there for Mom and Sarah.
“I’m going to pack a bag and come over. I can miss classes tomorrow. I’ll leave now and be there in a couple of hours. Hang in there. I’ll be there soon, okay?”
“Okay.” She forced out the word. I could hear her sniff and wipe at her tears.
“Hey, Jacks,” she said, “be careful, okay?”
“I will.” I was already halfway packed, and opening up my e-mail to send messages to my professors to excuse my absence tomorrow. “You too.”
My mind was working overtime, going over every scenario of what could possibly be going on. I tried to stay focused and get a minimum of stuff in my bag before getting myself in my car and on the road in record time. I needed to stay alert and get there in one piece. The last thing we needed right now was anything else going wrong.
It was almost five in the morning when I finally made it to the hospital. Sarah called me about two hours earlier to inform me that Dad suffered a heart attack and that they were going to perform an emergency coronary angioplasty.
As I entered the hospital, I was hit with the strong scent of antiseptic. After giving my name and explaining why I was there, I was escorted to a special family waiting area. I noticed Mom and Sarah huddled together on vinyl seats. The strong smell hit me again, and the bare waiting area gave off a very sterile and cold feeling, making me shiver.
Sarah was the first to notice me, and jumped up from her seat.
“You’re here,” was all she said before she wrapped herself around me and crumpled in my arms. I guess she held up to be there for Mom, but now she was ready to fall apart.
Fe
eling her go to pieces in my arms and seeing the devastation on my mother’s face, I was hit by the seriousness of the situation. This was really happening. My father had had a heart attack. They were doing an emergency procedure on him now, and we didn’t know if he would pull through. I needed to be the strong one. I suddenly felt a whole lot older than when I went to bed a few hours ago.
“Hey.” I rubbed circles on Sarah’s back, trying to assure her. “It’s going to be okay. He’ll pull through this. He’s a fighter, you’ll see.” I tried to meet Mom’s gaze and make her hear my words.
Sarah pulled me to the horrible orange vinyl chairs and set me on Mom’s other side. Mom filled me in on what she already knew, which wasn’t a lot. It was basically what Sarah already told me on the phone, but I was guessing her talking about it gave her something to do and kept her mind occupied. I was glad to keep her distracted while we waited for the nurses to come back with updates or the doctor to inform us he was done with the procedure.
About an hour after I arrived, the door swung open and a doctor wearing a cap and scrubs entered the waiting area and addressed Mom.
“Mrs. Wright?”
“Yes?”
“I’m Doctor Morrison. I performed the angioplasty on your husband.” He shook her hand.
“How is he doing?” she asked, not letting go of his hand. It was as if she needed the support to hear whatever news he had to give. Whatever the doctor thought, he gave no indication and continued to hold her hand.
“Your husband suffered a severe heart attack. We were able to locate the blockage in the coronary artery and open up the blockage. We felt it best to place a stent to prevent further complications.”
“So he’s going to be okay?” Mom looked like she might collapse. The stress of this night was too much for her.
“For now, we’re moving him to the Cardiac Care Unit to monitor him for the next twenty-four hours. It took us a while to locate the blockage causing his heart to not get the necessary oxygen. The next twenty-four hours will determine if he’ll make a full recovery.”
I wrapped one arm around Mom. After hearing this news, I pulled her closer. She mumbled her thanks to the doctor and let go of his hand. She sagged into me, and Sarah was right there to hold her up on the other side. I made eye contact with the doctor and nodded my thanks.
Sarah and I directed Mom to the chairs, which I hated the longer I was forced to stay here. I felt like a caged animal waiting for any kind of sign that all would work out all right.
A nurse entered after the doctor left and informed us that Dad was set up in his room. Mom could go and sit with him for a few minutes. One of us could join her. They had a policy of only two family members at a time, for no more than five minutes.
We walked over to the right wing, and Sarah and Mom went in. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to see my father hooked up to all of those machines, making this nightmare seem more real.
After about seven minutes, Sarah came out looking dreadful. Her eyes were bloodshot, her cheeks puffy, signs of the many tears she shed. I realized as I checked my watch and saw it was 6:18 a.m.
“You better go in, before they tell us our time is up.” She huffed. “I can’t believe this is happening, you know?”
She looked at me like I had the answers, or some kind of magical solution. When we were little, she’d always come to me, with that sweet, innocent look and demand I solve whatever problem she got herself into. Mostly it took me showing up in all my big brother glory, or a punch to some knucklehead’s face.
No amount of punching or threatening would fix this.
“I know,” I admitted. “I can’t believe it myself.”
“You better go, or you might not get a chance to see him.” She started crying again.
“Hey, he’ll pull through this. You have to believe that.” I couldn’t even imagine the possibility of Dad not being here anymore.
“Go!” She pushed me to the door, and I took a deep breath and entered.
I was rooted on the spot when I saw Dad lying in that hospital bed, hooked up to all those monitors and tubes. I hadn’t a clue what they were for, but they crowded the space around him, almost drowning him out in the middle of all of that chaos. I noticed my mom staring up at me, one hand clasping Dad’s, the other reaching out for me.
“It’s okay, Jacks, come on over. It’s just Dad.”
I knew it was Dad, but my eyes seemed drawn to the equipment all around him. I’d never seen so much medical stuff in all my life.
I went over to Mom, and she squeezed my hand.
“He’s going to be okay, honey,” she assured me, but her gaze was fixed on him. My parents had always had an amazing marriage. I’d never had any doubt they loved each other. They were what I hoped to have someday.
A minute or two passed, and a nurse popped into Dad’s room. After checking the monitors she informed us that we needed to let him rest. I patted my dad’s leg. It seemed to be the only body part not attached to some equipment, and Mom kissed his forehead before we reluctantly left.
Sarah was waiting in the hallway, texting on her phone. The smell of antiseptic was even stronger outside of Dad’s room than inside. My stomach churned as my nose filled with the offending scent.
“Kids, I want you to go home, get a few hours of sleep and a meal before you come back here,” Mom said.
I started to protest, but she wasn’t having it.
“Jacks, you spent three hours driving.“ She looked at me to confirm, and I nodded. No way was I going to let her know I‘d made it in two and a half hours. “You both are exhausted and need a rest. I don’t want any discussions.”
“Okay, Mom,” Sarah answered at the same time I replied “Yes, Mom.”
She hugged us both and repeated her instructions for us to go home, sleep, eat, and return with a change of clothes and some food for her.
“I don’t want to have to venture into the cafeteria and end up in one of these beds myself,” she joked. She must be feeling a bit better if she could joke. That calmed my nerves some.
Sarah drove home with me. We didn’t talk much. Once we arrived, she hugged me and headed to her room.
I hauled my bag in and dragged myself to my room. Moments like this made me glad Mom always kept my room the way I’d left it. That meant I could crash into a made bed and go straight to sleep. I didn’t even bother changing. I kicked my shoes off and didn’t even keep my head up to see where they landed.
I could hear a ringing noise, and I rolled over, awaking from a nightmare filled with hospital scenes. My body ached, and I tried to remember why I went to sleep wearing my jeans and BAC hoodie. Then I remembered and groaned. I checked the time and did a double take when I saw it was 2:30 p.m. I couldn’t believe I’d slept that long.
I heard the ringing noise again and decided I needed to get a move on.
As I made my way downstairs, the noise got louder. My nose filled with the smell of melted cheese and something else. I had no clue what it was, but my stomach rumbled in answer, reminding me I hadn’t eaten since yesterday afternoon before my shift at the coffee shop.
I walked into the kitchen, and I stopped short. Jane was hunched over, pushing buttons on the oven. I hadn’t seen her in a couple of months, and I probably looked like hell.
“Hey, Sar, do you know how to switch this off?” she called out as she heard me enter the kitchen, mistaking me for Sarah. I fumbled for a second before my brain kicked in.
“Sure, push these two buttons, and you’re good to go.” I leaned in and caught her by surprise. Jane did that blushing thing she seemed to do around me, and although my mood was down with all that was going on with Dad, I noticed it and smiled. This girl was really beautiful, even more when she turned that tempting shade of pink.
“Hey there, Jackson. I thought you were Sarah.” She looked down, a little shy.
“I get that all the time.”
She laughed, and I felt some of the weight lift. “So why are you arguing wit
h the oven?” I pointed to the offending appliance and noticed that smell again. My stomach growled in response, loud enough for Jane to notice.
“That was me, trying to switch off your oven—unsuccessfully, I might add.” She smiled, and I felt it hit me right in my gut. This girl still had the ability to make me feel unbalanced.
“Well, that’s all taken care of now. Why, might I ask, are you over here, using our oven?”
“Oh.” She laughed, and it did funny things to me. “My mom made a casserole, and I came over to heat it up when Sarah texted me she was up. I think she’s in the shower, or getting dressed.”
“So, why aren’t you in school?” I couldn’t imagine what she was doing here on a Friday afternoon when school wasn’t over yet.
“Now, that’s easy.” She grinned. “I didn’t have classes today, so I came home for the weekend. When Sarah called…”Her voice trailed off.
I looked at Jane and really took her in. She was here, when we were going through all of this, and I felt so grateful for her. My sister was lucky to have her in her life. I felt so lucky to have her in my life, and here right now.
“Thank you.” I exhaled. The stress, worry, and dread of the last twelve hours hit me full force again, and I blinked to keep my emotions at bay.
“Hey, no problem.” Jane took a step toward me. She seemed hesitant. But before I knew what was happening, she took another step and rested her hand on my shoulder. That was all the invitation I needed. I pulled her to me and melted in her arms. She wrapped her long, slim arms around me, and I found the comfort I was looking for. The tension eased up, and I felt like a light appeared at the end of this dark tunnel. Dad would pull through, and I would keep it together to help Sarah and Mom through this.
“It’s going to be okay, Jacks.” She tightened her arms around me. Her words and the way my name rolled off of her lips warmed me from the inside out and made me feel comforted and calm.
I lingered a little longer in her arms before I reluctantly pulled away. As she slipped back, I gripped her hand in mine and gave it a squeeze. My gaze traveled from our hands to her face. Her intense emerald eyes shone, and I tried to communicate what I couldn’t say.
The Songs of You and Me Page 14
