Love, Me: A Pleasant Valley Novel

by Anna Brooks

Dammit, my word is my bond, and he knows that. “I’ll promise as long as it’s not something that can hurt him.”

  “It’s not.”

  “Brad and I aren’t related.”

  “What?” Why in the hell would he lie about something like that?

  “I met him in juvie.”

  “Okay.” I rub my throbbing temples with the tips of my fingers. “What?”

  “We were cell mates for about eight months. He had my back, and I had his. I was there before him and after; he left two months before me. When I got out, I wasn’t planning to see him again. Somehow, I ran into him like a week after I got out.”

  “What did he get in trouble for?”

  “Intent to sell. He really doesn’t want Kennedy to know. He’s ashamed of it.”

  I almost can’t believe it. “I won’t say anything.”

  “So when I ran into him, he told me he was leaving soon to go down south to work for his uncle’s construction company. We both went, and he moved back just two years later. When I told him I was coming back last year, he asked if I’d tell Kenny I was his cousin. So I did.”

  “What does this have to do with anything?”

  “Brad was dealing for Petey.”

  “No.” I shake my head. “No way. He’s not a drug dealer.”

  “Not now, but he was. That’s what he got arrested doing, babe. The point to this all is that even after getting caught and being thrown in detention, when Brad got out, Petey was still waiting for his money from the supply the police had confiscated from Brad. It wasn’t even a large amount.”

  “Jesus, Vaughn.”

  “That scar on Brad’s neck?”

  “Yeah?” He has a straight line parallel with his jugular.

  “It’s Petey’s warning that he’s been crossed once. If Brad hadn’t paid him before we went to Tennessee, he would have slashed the vertical line with a horizontal one. That’s his ‘symbol.’”

  That’s something you see in a damn movie, my God. “How did he pay him?”

  Vaughn looks up at the ceiling and huffs out a breath.

  “Vaughn.”

  “I don’t . . . He sold a gold necklace, and then I, uh, helped him rob a place for the other eight hundred and seventy-five dollars. We took off after Petey’s debt was paid.”

  “Oh, my God. You helped him rob somewhere and got away with it. Why would you do that?”

  “I was eighteen. I’m not proud of it, Rayne, but we had to get out of here. If I didn’t help him get the money to pay off his debt, the only other option I would have had for myself would have been to work for Dirt or Petey, and I knew if that happened, I’d never get out of the fuckin’ valley. I’d end up like everyone else down there.”

  I sympathize with him, I do. And I understand his struggle. Not that it makes it right, but I ask him. “Where did you rob?”

  He crosses his arms and glances at me before avoiding my eyes. As I’m waiting for him to tell me, I blow a lock of hair off my face. All of a sudden, it hits me. “No.” It wasn’t him. “Please tell me it wasn’t you.”

  Instead of answering, his shoulder sags in defeat.

  “No.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “Vaughn, no.”

  “It’s been killing me to keep it from you, but Brad—”

  “That’s why you were so insistent on walking me out. You knew how fucking easy it was for someone to rob the restaurant!” I take a step back from him when he pushes off the counter. “Don’t.”

  “Dammit, Rayne. It was fucked up; I know that.”

  My throat dries up, and I press my lips together to stop myself from crying. “I don’t even know what to say. I can’t believe you. And Brad. My God, you two were the ones who robbed us.” More words of anger die on my tongue as he comes toward me. I remember it. I remember seeing how much it affected my parents.

  When he grabs my hand to pull me close, I jerk my arm away. “Don’t fucking touch me!”

  “Rayne, baby. Please.”

  My brain feels like when you run so fast, you lose your footing, and you know you’re going to fall, but you can’t do anything about it. It can’t keep up; I can’t keep up. When he reaches for me again, I stumble to get away from him. “Is that why you’re with me? You feel bad for something you did years ago?”

  “Fuck, no. Jesus, how can you think that?”

  “Because you just told me you and my best friend’s fiancé were responsible for robbing my parents’ restaurant! Oh, my God—Kenny. I have to tell him!” I rush to the living room to grab my purse, and when my fingers graze the strap, Vaughn wraps his arms around me from behind.

  “You can’t tell him.”

  “Let me go.” I struggle to get out of his hold, but he just lifts me off my feet. When he begins to carry me down the hallway, I kick at his shins.

  “Dammit. Stop.”

  “No. Let me go.”

  He brings me into his bedroom and lays me on the bed then crawls over me. My arms stretch but don’t hurt as he holds them above my head. Before he has a chance to cage my legs in, I try to knee him, but he dodges my attempt. I’m so upset right now that I swear I would hurt him if he let me go.

  “Look at me.” His voice is softer than before. It lacks the strength but is definitely filled with regret.

  I close my eyes and twist my neck, so I’m facing the wall. He wants cooperation, and he’s not going to get it.

  “Fine.” His weight gets heavier as he presses his upper body against mine. The stubble on his jaw tickles my cheek as he puts his lips next to my ear. “I can’t lose you over something stupid I did when I was fighting for my damn life. Could I have left Brad to do it on his own, to abandon the only fuckin’ person who had my back? Yeah, I could have. But what did I say my biggest fault was?”

  I’m too loyal.

  “If I didn’t do that, if I didn’t help him out, I’d probably be dead right now. Brad would probably be dead, too. We did what we had to survive.”

  I don’t even want to think about what they went through much less if they weren’t here. Brad makes Kenny so happy, and Vaughn, well, Vaughn makes me forget what sadness even feels like.

  “I’m sorry.” He kisses my cheek, and even though I’m pissed at him, a shudder courses through me. “So sorry, Rainey. I plan on us being together for a really long time, and I don’t want this to be something I hide from you. I don’t want to hide anything from you. And I know it’s asking a lot for you to forgive me for it, but I’ll beg you if I have to. I can’t fuckin’ lose you. I love you too damn much, and part of my loving you means I will never lie to you.” He rubs the side of his face against mine. “But if this is too much for you, I . . . It’ll kill me, but I can’t expect you to stay if you hate me for it. I won’t force you to love me.”

  I turn my head when his weight disappears and watch him walk out of the room with tense shoulders and hands fisted at his side. Instead of moving, I stare at his shitty popcorn ceiling.

  When my parents’ restaurant was robbed, I remember it like it was yesterday. I got pulled out of school early, and my dad didn’t tell me what was wrong until I got home. Two masked men had walked into the restaurant with guns. One pointed it at my mom, and the other made my dad give him the money. They only took eight hundred and seventy-five dollars. One of them actually dropped some money on the floor after they counted it.

  My mother was traumatized. She was scared to go to work, scared to be alone. They never caught the guys who did it . . . now, I know why.

  Shit. So much makes sense, though. The reason Brad left such large tips then just stopped coming in. I thought it was just because he met Kenny. Now, I know why Vaughn was so damn worried about me walking to my car with the money envelope. But this was a huge mistake, not like when I accidentally put a lip-gloss in my pocket instead of paying for it at the store.

  But he, they were doing it to save themselves. To have a chance at an actual future. Vaughn was, at least. I’ve met Brad’s family.
They’re not poor at all. So I get Vaughn, but don’t quite understand Brad. I guess he wanted a fresh start. To get away from the drugs and stuff. I guess I can understand that. I get it. I’m not cool with it, but I get it.

  When I get out of the bed, it creaks, and I expect Vaughn to come in, but he doesn’t. I make my way down the hall and find him staring out of the window with his back to me. “If you’re going to leave, just do it. I don’t want to watch you walk out.”

  Just to be a bitch, I go to the door and open it then slam it shut. His head falls. “God-fucking-dammit.” He hits the wall next to the window and lets out a groan, a growl almost. I should say something, but I’m kind of mesmerized by him. After a few minutes, he hits the wall again then straightens out. When he turns around and sees me, his body actually jerks and the color that drained from his face comes back.

  “I kind of love you, ya know?”

  “Jesus,” he breathes.

  “I get it. I’m not happy about it, but I get it.”

  He still hasn’t moved a muscle as I make my way to him. When I stop inches from him, he opens his arms and wraps them around me as soon as I step into him. He doesn’t say anything, but I can feel the emotion coming from him—relief, regret . . . passion.

  “You do realize Kennedy needs to know, right?” I mumble against his chest.

  “It’s not our place.”

  “How is it not? Kenny’s my best friend.”

  “You’re not in his bed every night, darlin’. It’s up to Brad when and if he wants to share that with him. Besides”—he runs his hands up my back, and when he reaches my shoulders, he slides them around and up my neck to hold my face—“this, right here, is your place.”

  Chapter 24

  Vaughn

  Rayne falls asleep after I took my time to show her how damn sorry I was. I might not be the most deserving of her, but I’m damn sure never taking her for granted. It’s been absolutely killing me that I didn’t tell her earlier about Brad. But much like how he’s kept my shit to himself, I felt it was only right to do the same for him.

  The robbery was, out of all the things I’ve done in my life, the thing I regret the most. I might have had shit and have been shit, but I never laid it on anyone else. I never hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it. I never stole from anyone unless it was already in their garbage. I’ve worked hard to get to where I am, and I’m proud I’ve done it the right way. I never took advantage of anyone, except for the robbery, and I try to forget about it as much as possible. I’ve definitely never told anybody about it.

  She’s lying next to me, and I can’t resist running my fingers over her lips. Across her forehead. Down her cheek. Once I know she’s out, I get out of bed and cringe when it squeaks. I really need to get a better place since she’s gonna be living with me. We haven’t actually discussed it, but it’s going to happen.

  I grab my phone off the kitchen table and dial Brad.

  “Hey.” The loud music from the club almost drowns his voice out.

  “Got a minute?”

  “Yeah. Let me go to my office.” I wait as I hear him shuffling around and then the background noise goes away. “What’s up?”

  “She knows.”

  “Fuck,” he yells.

  “I had to tell her, since Petey paid me a visit.”

  “What the fuck?” He growls the words, and I can picture the vein in his forehead pulsing.

  “Came to let me know he was giving me a two-week extension on my mom’s fifteen K.”

  “You’re bailing her out? After everything she fucking did?”

  I sit down on the couch and rest my neck on the back cushion. “I wasn’t going to. I don’t need that shit back in my life. But . . . fuck, man. If I don’t, I’m signing her death certificate.”

  “She wouldn’t think twice about handing you over to fuckin’ Petey, Vaughn. Don’t give in. She might have given birth to you, but she was no mother.” He preaches to me the same thing I know; the harsh truth that still crushes me every time I hear it.

  “I know.” I swallow, and the acid burning in my throat slides down and sinks to my gut. “I don’t know if I can have her blood on my hands, too.”

  “He died from an overdose. That’s not on you. And with Rose, it’s not your hands. It’s Petey’s. She threw you out of the house when you were twelve so she could use your bedroom to have a train run on her. When it was fifteen degrees outside. She made you—”

  “I know. I fucking know, because I was there. I lived it.”

  “Then you know she’s not worth it. I’m sorry, Vaughn. I really am, but you cannot ruin what you have going with Rayne by handing over fifteen G’s to Petey. And you and I both know that if you hand that over, you’ll not only be on his radar, but word will spread, too. Use that money to put a down payment on a house. Get a new truck. Go on a cruise. Just don’t waste it on a woman who wished you were never born, because the woman who loves you is the only one who should matter.”

  “I know,” I bark. “She is.”

  “Then you know what to do.”

  “Yeah. Later.”

  He hangs up, and I crawl back into bed and hold Rayne, the only one who’s ever actually cared, and the only one who’s worth more than I can ever give her.

  * * *

  The sound of glass breaking wakes me up, and I reach for Rayne but come up empty. My adrenaline forces me out of bed and into the hallway in a matter of seconds. When I reach the kitchen, I skid to a stop. “Are you okay?”

  Rayne whips her head up from her crouched position. “Yes. I dropped the stupid plate because the stupid grease from the stupid bacon got all over my fingers.”

  The erratic beat of my heart slows down, and in its place, a slow and steady rhythm takes over. Jesus, just the thought of something bad happening to her nearly gives me a heart attack. I bend down and help her clean up the mess then grab her hand. “Let’s go. I’ll take you out to breakfast.”

  She washes her hands and tosses the paper towel on the counter. “Fine. As long as I get bacon.”

  “You can have all the bacon you want.”

  Her hips sway as she walks closer. “Good, ’cause I’m starving.” She reaches up on her toes and kisses my cheek. “Hurry up and shower.”

  “Bossy.”

  “Hungry,” she counters.

  I rush through a quick shower and drive us to the best pancake house in town.

  “What are your plans for the day?” I ask her.

  “I was going to run some wedding errands with Kenny. My bridesmaid dress is supposed to be done, and he needs to pick up some party favors.”

  “Cool.”

  “You’re going, right? I can’t believe we haven’t talked about it sooner.”

  I toss my napkin on the table and hand some cash to the waitress. “Yeah. Of course. I wouldn’t miss my own cousin’s wedding.”

  She rolls her eyes. “Jerk.”

  “Did you take next Sunday off?” The wedding is one week from today.

  “Yep. I plan on being hungover and sleeping the day away.”

  “Want company?”

  “As long as it’s you.”

  I lean across the table to kiss her, and when she’s finished eating, we head out. I drop her off at her place, and after walking her inside, I drive straight to the shop. My first appointment is going to be here right away, so I get everything set up and sit on the couch in the waiting room and wait for her to arrive. Luckily, I had a cancellation right before she called a couple of days ago. She sounded really frantic about getting in today.

  The door whips open and I look up. “Hey. Are you Mellie?”

  “Yes. Vaughn?”

  “Yup. If you’re ready, we can start right away.”

  “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

  I lead her back and gesture for her to put her purse on a chair. “Where did you say you wanted it?”

  “I think on my hip.”

  I chuckle, and her eyes light up a bit, some of the nerves
going away. “You think?”

  “No. I know. I know I want it on my hip. I’m sorry.” She wrings her fingers together. “I’m nervous.”

  It’s obvious she’s a virgin at this. “It’s okay.” I pat the black vinyl seat. “Hop up and lie down.”

  She does as I say and flinches when the cold material touches the back of her legs.

  “Can you roll the top of your shorts down and pull your shirt up a bit?”

  After a deep breath, she does what I ask.

  “You didn’t change your mind about the font or anything, did you?”

  “No.”

  When I rub her skin with green soap, she flinches and apologizes. “Sorry.”

  “No worries.”

  I put on a pair of black gloves and grab the transfer paper from the small desk. Before setting it on her skin, I meticulously position it, press it down and then peel it away. I tilt my head back and forth a few times before handing her a mirror. “That look okay?”

  With a shaky hand, she takes the mirror and studies the single word: Yours. Sometimes, clients tell me why they’re being tatted, sometimes not. I never pry. “You’re going to add to the background, right?”

  “Yeah, I’m just freehanding that. It’ll look like you asked—a broken heart pieced back together.”

  “Okay. Let’s do this.”

  I smile at her, and she blushes then drops her head.

  When I press my foot on the pedal, and the first vibration hits her skin, she jumps. “Sorry.”

  “No biggie. Take a breath.”

  “Tell me if you need a break, okay?”

  “Yup.”

  She closes her eyes, and I submerge myself into my work. My art. A lot of times, I get so immersed I don’t even have a concept of time, but since I’ve been with Rayne, the minutes away from her add up, and I find myself getting antsy.

  “Okay, you’re done.”

  “What, really?” She couldn’t sound more surprised than if she woke up with horns growing out of her head.

  “Yeah, it’s been an hour, babe.” I hand her the mirror. “Take a look.”

  She stands, and when the full image reflects in the glass, she almost drops the handle. “Wow. It’s beautiful. Thank you.”