Concealed Affliction

by Harlow Stone

  I take a step inside, following Jimmy. My nose is immediately assaulted with the scent of cinnamon and old people. My boots squeak on the old linoleum floor as we make our way toward the front of the house where the office is located.

  We first pass through the tiny kitchen. There’s a small oak table for four and very cluttered countertops. Every nook and cranny is filled with old lady dust collectors. Porcelain roosters and cow shaped salt and pepper shakers. There are shelves along the upper part of the wall going all the way around the room, continuing into the hallway. Every type of farm animal figurine you can imagine is filling the shelves.

  I don’t waste time glancing into the living room on our right, but continue straight to the end of the hallway where the office is located on the left. There’s no door separating it from the rest of the house. Our footsteps become silent as we enter the room with a rust colored carpet.

  “Fuck Jay, your mom would’ve had a heart attack in here.”

  I give his arm a squeeze, acknowledging he’s very right. My mother spent a lot of time helping to decorate my father’s architectural masterpieces. One look at the wood paneling and rust colored carpet would’ve given her a complex.

  “Two filing cabinets, Jimmy. We each take one. ANIG is what we’re looking for on the bill of sale, or a signature with the names I gave you. Shawn Flynn, Andrew Roberts or M. Downey.”

  “Got it.”

  We each take a cabinet, hoping to get this done quickly. I note they aren’t filed alphabetically but by year of purchase.

  “Cabe told me that property was purchased roughly three years ago. That could mean 2012 or possibly 2011. Let’s check those first.”

  “Alright, I have 2011.”

  We each begin pulling out files, one by one, searching for the appropriate names. Most of the properties sold are hunting cabins, or small trailers near the lake. We’ve been searching for about ten minutes when Jimmy gives me the news I’ve been waiting to hear.

  “Got it.”

  I drop the files in my hands and take the ones Jimmy thrusts between us.

  “Look, purchasing date November 2011. I wouldn’t have recognized the signature. Thank fuck they make you print it too. Shawn Flynn. He signed for it, but the purchase was made through ANIG Tech.”

  I flip the pages, looking for the address.

  “Lot fifty-three, Pine Point. Where the fuck is Pine Point?”

  “I don’t know, Jay. I don’t think we need this. I’ll take a few pictures with my phone, leave the file here.”

  “Good call.”

  Jimmy flips through the pages, taking photos of each one and a few extras of the survey photo, giving the exact location of the property in Pine Point. We clean up our mess, putting everything back the way it was before exiting the house. We make sure to lock the door behind us and put the propane bill back in the door.

  “Are you going to call Cabe?” Jimmy asks as we walk briskly across the road toward where I parked the truck.

  “I want to find Pine Point on the GPS before I do. Let’s get back in the truck, I’ll feel more comfortable calling him once we’re on the road.”

  Jimmy nods his head and puts his hand on my shoulder, giving a mild squeeze. As much as I’m thankful we found what we were looking for, I want to get the fuck out of this creepy dark little town.

  We round the bend and cut across the ditch into the lookout area. The moon is almost full, giving us an easy view of our surroundings as we make our way to the truck. I look down, careful not to trip on anything, but let out a gasp as Jimmy’s hand wraps firmly around my arm, shoving me behind him.

  I stumble into his back, his feet now planted firmly on the ground, not moving. I reach out and steady myself on his arms, peeking out in front of him. The hair on the back of my neck stands up as I take note of the tall man leaning against the front of my BMW.

  He too is dressed in dark jeans with a long sleeve dark shirt. His hair is dark brown, I think, and a few inches long around his masculine face.

  “Who the fuck are you?” Jimmy asks in a tone I’ve never heard from him before. It’s low, and a little intimidating.

  Both men are about the same size, around six feet tall. Not as wide and defined as Ryder and Denny, but still fit.

  “Step away from my truck, asshole.”

  The man steps away from my truck, casually, obviously not threatened by us. He takes a few steps forward, still about fifteen feet away from us. He’s not surprised by our presence, probably because he was waiting for us. I don’t recognize him, but something tells me he’s not out for blood as his eyes settle on mine with humor.

  “You’re every bit a pain in my ass that they told me you’d be.”

  I start to move out from behind the wall that is Jimmy, but he keeps his arm there to hold me back. I look into the man’s eyes, still having no recollection of who he is.

  “You know, I’m getting real fucking tired of people talking about me as if they know me.”

  I didn’t think any of my statement was funny, but obviously he does because his lips twitch and he shakes his head.

  “I’m just doing my job, ma’am.”

  Oh no he didn’t!

  “I guess ‘they’ didn’t inform you I hate being referred to as ‘ma’am’. But please, enlighten me on who you are and what that job would be.”

  “I work for Callaghan, Elle. I’m Maverick.”

  If Jimmy weren’t holding onto me right now, I think my knees may have buckled.

  He sent someone after me?

  What the hell! I can’t hide the anger in my tone and I don’t bother trying to.

  “I left him and everything else behind. Pardon my language, and I’m sorry you got handed this job, but what the fuck?”

  Jimmy has relaxed at the mention of Ryder and I move to stand beside him. He throws an arm around my shoulders in silent support, and it doesn’t go unnoticed by Maverick.

  “I’ve been here for a few days. Cabe called tonight and asked me to follow up on the lead in regard to the property purchase. You beat me to it.”

  What. The. Hell.

  “Did you follow me from North Carolina?”

  He actually looks slightly sheepish before he responds.

  “No. I was three hours behind. I tracked your truck.”

  I can’t hide the irritation. I step out and away from Jimmy’s arm and move to stand in front of Maverick. He’s quite handsome this close, even with the scar running from his cheekbone down to his jaw.

  “Go home, Maverick. I told him I didn’t want anyone here, and I meant it.”

  I move past him to the truck, unlocking it as I go.

  “Jay.”

  I turn around and look at Jimmy, still standing where I left him.

  “Not such a bad idea to have some help.”

  I stare incredulously at him, my fingers wrapped around the handle of my truck.

  “You want help with something Jimmy? Make friends with him. I don’t want help. I’m done with people dying around here. I told Ryder that but he’s to goddamn stupid to listen. I’m leaving, so if you want a ride I suggest you get your ass in the truck.”

  I see Maverick on his phone, typing something. He’s not put out by my attitude. I guess he was right when he said they warned him about me.

  I start the BMW and roll down the window, suddenly hot from anger. How dare he? I swear that man thinks he walks on fucking water and can stick his nose wherever it doesn’t damn well belong without any consequences. I look out the windshield and watch Jimmy share a few words with Maverick. He doesn’t stay long before he moves to the passenger side of the vehicle and gets in the truck.

  He turns in his seat to look at me with an emotion I rarely witness.

  Anger.

  “You know Jayne, I fucking love you. Along with a pile of other people. Where you may think this vigilante act is protecting people, you’re wrong! Let me ask you something; would you take a bullet for me? For Laura?

  “If I was i
n pain or danger, would you do anything in your power to fucking help me? If Laura was in danger and you could give your life for hers, would you do it?”

  “Yes! Of course I would!”

  For the first time in his life, he raises his voice to me.

  “THEN QUIT BEING SO GODDAMN STUBBORN!”

  He slams his fist down on the dash of the truck, not caring that it caused the light on the heater switch to go out. His breathing is heavy. I don’t think in the many years I’ve known him that I’ve seen him so pissed off.

  “You’re so fucking selfless, Jay! With everyone you know. You’d do anything, for anybody! Yet when anyone has ever tried to give you even a lick of help, you shut that shit down! Do you think that little of us? That we wouldn’t do the same for you? PULL YOUR FUCKING HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS!”

  Jimmy has never had a temper, so to say I’m surprised at his outburst would be a huge understatement. I don’t know what to say, or what to do. I do the only thing I can which is pass him my pack of smokes out of the cup holder and hope to hell the nicotine will make him feel better. I know my words won’t.

  He doesn’t acknowledge me when I pass him the smokes. He doesn’t look at me at all. I would say it hurts, but I know he needs a minute. I pull one out for myself and light it up, ignoring the burning of tears behind my eyes. I momentarily forgot about the commando lurking around until I notice the phone thrust through the open window of my truck.

  I look up into pale grey eyes, somewhat remorseful. I now know he heard everything that went on between Jimmy and I. I also know he probably isn’t fond of his job at the moment. I grab the phone, assuming it must be Cabe with more info, or him calling to ask about the info I found.

  “Yes?”

  I answer wearily.

  “I agree with your guy, about letting people help you.”

  Ryder’s voice forces me to close my eyes. Can’t there be one day of peace? One where I don’t have to second guess myself or the people around me? One where I just don’t have any surprises lurking around the next corner. Something in the back of my head says I would hate that, and my life would become too boring.

  “Sounds like it. Being as I have a bodyguard even though I specifically said I didn’t want one.”

  He huffs on the other end of line, obviously fed up with my shit. I’m fed up with him too, but I’m too goddamn tired to argue at the moment.

  “Deal with it, because he’s not going anywhere. You made it into the office first. Cabe called you before he talked to Maverick; he didn’t expect you to go all Mata Hari and try to dig this information up on your own, although it doesn’t surprise me.

  “Anyway, if you could let me know what you found, Cabe can get on it.”

  I look over at my friend, fuming in the passenger seat. He’s too good to me and I know he means well. I just can’t stand the thought of anything happening to him.

  “I’ll have Jimmy send you the photos of the file. It was signed off by Shawn Flynn.”

  Remembering what I wanted to do in the first place, I reach forward to open up the GPS application and set Maverick’s phone to speaker on the dash. I access the GPS function on the dash and a big triangle with a warning comes up, informing me of the GPS malfunction.

  “Dude, you broke my GPS.”

  Jimmy’s eyes finally meet mine, not at all remorseful.

  “The stubborn bitch routine finally got on my last nerve, Jay.”

  He passes me his iPhone and I commence the search on that.

  “Ryder?”

  “Still here, babe.”

  I ignore the endearment and power on.

  “Pine Point. That’s where the property is located. It says it’s over and hour east of here, closer to where I came from. The country roads obviously make the drive longer than it looks on the map.”

  “Don’t go there, Elle.”

  I heave out a sigh in annoyance.

  “I’m not an idiot, Ryder. But thanks for the vote of confidence.”

  “For fuck’s sake, Elle. You know that’s not what I meant. You heard your friend, people care about you. I fucking care about you! If you think you have more experience than a bunch of us frogs who practically killed for a living, you’re wrong. I hate to say this to you beautiful, but set your pride aside and do as you’re fucking told for once! I’m a reasonable man, but don’t think for one second I won’t give Maverick orders to lock you in a goddamn room to keep your ass alive!”

  Two outbursts, in one day, by two important men in my life. Well, one more important than the other. I don’t get to be shocked at Ryder for long before Jimmy joins in.

  “I love you Jay, but so long as you remain the stubborn bitch, I’m going to side with Ryder on this one. I’ve hid you for a few days, fuck I’ll hide you for a month. But I won’t watch you throw what’s left of your life away because you won’t accept any help.”

  I hang my head in my hands, closing my eyes and covering my face to hide the tears that threaten me.

  It’s too much.

  All of it.

  I’m tired.

  I’m overwhelmed.

  I feel defeated.

  I feel weak.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  I don’t remember the drive back home. I didn’t speak to Jimmy and I have no recollection of what time I finally crawled into Jimmy’s bed.

  It’s funny, the things that our minds choose to block out. The things we’re no longer able to absorb. Once your mind hits that place, that rock bottom pit in your head where you just feel like everything you once thought made sense has been shot to shit. Well, that’s when you shut down.

  I’ve lived a long time now believing down to my bones that my presence is a death wish to those closest to me. Considering the track record of those closest to me, and the graves I’ve visited, it’s a proven fact.

  Is it so wrong to want to keep them out of it?

  Am I wrong to ignore my friend’s help?

  I know I need it. It would be impossible to be where I am now without the help of people like Cabe, Jimmy and Ryder. I know this and I’m immensely grateful for them. I basically kept them on the outside though. They’ve been giving me information and hiding me when needed, but ultimately I’ve tried ensuring they’ve kept their distance from where the real threats are, not wanting to put them directly in harm’s way.

  I guess I hoped only communicating mostly by phone calls, and the odd pow wow with a few of them, that I would be able to keep their involvement a secret. Surely wherever Shawn is, he has not figured out I’ve had any help in getting me to where I am today. Obviously he doesn’t even know that I’m here. If he did I wouldn’t be spending my entire day moping in Jimmy’s bed, thinking about how I got to where I am.

  Jimmy is a straight shooter, much like myself. Surprisingly he has been quiet since he lost his shit on me last night. I deserved it, I know I did. I also know how much he loves me because it takes a lot of bombs to be dropped on him before he finally blows up.

  It’s at a time like this that I wish for Laura. I know I can’t call her yet, regardless of how much I want to. So I’m at a stalemate.

  I haven’t heard any more about the cabin in Pine Point. I figure if there was any important information, it would’ve been shared with me. I left my phone on the island in the kitchen, knowing that Jimmy will answer it if it rings.

  He’s been down in the shop painting. I know it’s his own form of therapy. Plus it’s his work and I’m sure he has a lot to catch up on since I’ve taken up his time. I don’t mind that he’s not up here to console me. I managed to shower and to throw on some comfortable clothing since I slept in what I wore last night.

  Aside from the shower and a bathroom break, I’ve spent the majority of my time in bed. I’m sure it must be pushing close to dinner, however I have no desire to eat, and even less to get out of bed.

  Is this depression?

  Maybe my months of nightmares and lack of sleep have finally caught up with me. Maybe my heart i
sn’t as cold as I thought, and the rants from both Jimmy and Ryder have begun to thaw that chill, enough that I worry about dying and not being able to spend more time with them. Well, more Jimmy than Ryder. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to trust someone like him again. It doesn’t mean I don’t still hold a candle for him. Not for us to get back together, more like the way you still think about a first love, the first person to make you feel something.

  That’s what Ryder did, and although I should be somewhat thankful for experiencing something like that, I remind myself not all stories come with a happy ending.