Where I Wanna Be

by Vera Roberts

  “Eli,” Faith’s voice came out as a moan, “I see everything with you.”

  “In that case,” he gave her another searing kiss, “I’ll wait for when you’re ready.”

  Five

  Faith looked around the family dinner table at the D’Amato house. She had been around big meals before, hosting many church gatherings at her family’s home and at other venues. There was always plenty of food for the guests and their second and third helpings. But what she witnessed with the food at the D’Amato house was something out of fantasy.

  Dishes upon dishes of food seemingly appeared out of nowhere. A large bowl of spaghetti was on her left. A large dish of eggplant parmesan was on her right. Several small bowls of meatballs were set in a circular fashion. A medium-sized bowl full of salad with fresh mozzarella and spinach was ahead of her. Two long pieces of Italian bread were chopped up and served in other bowls, with butter. Iced tea and wine were the beverages of choice and it was expected that everyone finish off their plate.

  Faith stared down at her plate and wondered if her new boyfriend was secretly trying to make her fat. She didn’t even want to think about dessert.

  “Faith, I’m glad you came to dinner and brought your parents along as well,” Nicola smiled at Faith and her parents. “I would like to ask the Reverend if he would do the honor of blessing our food tonight.”

  David stood up. “I would like for everyone to gather hands. Heavenly Father, we come before you in grace and humility on this day. We’d like to thank you for this food that’s going to provide nourishment for our bodies. We’d like to thank you for the company of the D’Amato family for hosting. We also thank you for watching over the relationship of our children, blessing them with the purity of their souls and bodies. In Your Name, we pray. Amen.”

  Eli and Faith looked at each other and smiled. “Your dad really doesn’t want me touching you at all, I take it?”

  “My daddy is just a little over-protective, that’s all.” Faith reassured.

  Eli remembered the not-so subtle threat Dave gave him before the first date, just six months earlier. “If he wasn’t a preacher, we wouldn’t be dating.” Eli commented.

  “True,” Faith nodded, “but he also sees the good in you.”

  “What good is that?”

  “Well,” Faith grabbed a little pasta on her fork, “you’re still alive.”

  After dinner, Eli and Faith went out to the backyard to admire his mother’s burgeoning garden. He pointed the different types of flowers to Faith, though he was a little sketchy on some of them. “This is what I’m doing with my mom when I’m not at school or work,” he shrugged, “gardening.”

  “You seem to know a lot about flowers.” Faith smiled.

  “Not by choice,” Eli added, “definitely not by choice.”

  Faith led Eli to a nearby bench that was tucked away in the corner of the garden. They sat together and looked up at the stars. “We’re going to be graduating soon, Eli. What are your plans?”

  “College,” he shrugged, “I’ll probably go to that junior college down the way. You?”

  “I hope to start cosmetology school soon,” she squeezed his hand. “And then maybe I’ll support myself through college by doing hair.”

  “Very smart,” Eli nodded.

  “Mama didn’t raise a fool.” Faith smiled. She paused for a moment and then became serious again. “What do you think is going to happen between us?”

  “What do you want to happen?” He asked.

  Faith shyly smiled and turned to Eli. “You always answer a question with a question, you know that?”

  “I do?” He smiled.

  “Seriously, baby…” Faith grabbed his hand and rubbed it. “…what do you see between us after we graduate?”

  “Well,” Eli got a little comfortable on the bench and briefly looked up at the stars, “I hope we continue to see each other and see what happens.”

  “But we’ll be out of high school at that point,” Faith replied, “we’ll both have open schedules and a lot more free time.”

  “I guess that means I’ll be able to see you a lot more, huh?” Eli asked.

  “I just don’t want you to feel smothered, Eli.” Faith replied. “I don’t want you to feel that you have to see me.”

  Eli remained quiet for a brief moment as he admired the stars. “Why am I getting the feeling you want me to break up with you?”

  “I’m being realistic, Eli.” Faith stood up and walked over to another corner in the garden. Eli soon followed her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “I know the weather is getting warmer and girls are wearing less clothing and I know you’ll probably be wondering why you are with them and why you’re waiting for me.”

  Eli swayed his girlfriend gently and kissed her cheek. “You like to assume a lot, don’t you?”

  “I’m just saying if you want to pursue someone else because I’m not putting out, now is your chance.” Faith declared.

  Eli sighed and turned Faith around to face him. “I’m going to repeat what I said on our first lunch date at school and our official date when I picked you up from your parents’ house; because clearly I wasn’t heard the first two times: I will wait for you, Faith. I hate to think I gave up on a great woman because I was impatient. I would love to make love to you. I would love to be the first and only lover you will ever have. But I also know if I do that, I have to wait. I would rather us break up because I got on your nerves or we no longer loved each other.”

  “I had guys break up with me because I didn’t give it up to them,” she frowned, “and I just want to save myself that heartache if you can’t wait.”

  “I’ll wait for you as long as you want me to,” Eli reassured, rubbing his hands up and down Faith’s arms. “I’m not going anywhere, Faye. I told you I see a future with you and I don’t say that to just anyone. But to reassure you, I have a picnic planned for us tomorrow at the meadows, not too far from here. We can just go there, have a nice picnic, and no hanky-panky. Deal?”

  Faith wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and buried her face in his chest. “You’re too good to be true, Eli.”

  “Nah,” he shook his head, “I just want to be the best boyfriend you ever had.”

  Faith inhaled Eli’s cologne and deeply sighed. “You already are.”

  ****

  “So, how’s it going with you and Faith?” Nick studied his cards. “It seems pretty serious for the two of you.”

  After Faith and her family left, the D’Amato boys gathered around the dining room table to catch up with each other while Nicola rested upstairs. “It’s getting there,” Eli admitted as he looked over his cards. “She has some trust issues still.”

  “She doesn’t trust anyone or she doesn’t trust you?” Kieran asked.

  “The former,” Eli then placed his bet, “I’ll help mom garden for a week.”

  “A week?” Joey raised an eyebrow. “Nah, bro, you need to come up with something better than that. I’m in that garden every damn weekend.”

  “All right, I’ll help mom garden for a month,” Eli upped his bet. “What’s your bet?”

  “I’ll clean the bathrooms here for a month.” Joey smiled.

  “Oh goodie, that reminds me to take a nice big shit here,” Kieran commented.

  “Fool, you do that and I will jig the toilet so it shoots water up your shitty ass,” Joey laughed.

  “All of you talking about shit, but you ain’t doing shit…” Nick commented. “I’ll make Sunday dinner for the next month.”

  The other brothers leaned back in their chairs and rubbed their chins at Nick’s bet. He was a damn good cook and his lasagna could put their mother’s to shame. “If Nick cooks, I’ll clean the kitchen after he’s done for a month.” Tony placed his bet.

  “I’ll take out the garbage, vacuum the floors, and do the windows,” Kieran placed his bet.

  “So how does it feel to date the daughter of a famous preacher, Eliodoro?” Nick aske
d as he passed out more cards. “I’m sure that has to be a lot of pressure on you?”

  “Keeping their souls pure, Lord!” Kieran mocked.

  “Thou shall not stick his filthy penis inside my baby girl, Lord!” Joey laughed.

  “Dude…” Eli shook his head. “…I didn’t think I was dating Faith and her father.”

  “Get used to it,” Kieran took a sip of beer, “when I was with Jalara, I had to date her, her sisters, her parents, her cousins, her best friends.”

  “You see, Eliodoro,” Nick began to wax poetic, “no one ever tells you that when you date a girl, she comes with baggage. It may not be visible at first but as you continue to date her, you see all the stuff you have to put up with. If she has a collection that she maintains, you need to support that, no matter how ridiculous you think it is.”

  “Baggage!” Joey added.

  “If she has a girlfriend who calls her every night at three in the morning, guess what? You’re up at three in the morning with some hot cocoa for your girl.” Nick added.

  “Baggage!” Kieran gave a hi-five to Joey.

  “And if Daddy is a soon-to-be worldwide famous preacher, your ass better be in his church every single Sunday because she ain’t having it any other way.” Nick finished.

  “Can I get an Amen?” Joey mimicked a preacher.

  “Amen!” The brothers finished.

  “But, like I was saying,” Nick took a sip of beer, “if you really love her and you really want to be with her, you don’t care about all of that. That baggage I just warned you about? It’s no longer baggage. It’s little quirks you get used to. And if you support her quirks, guess what? You get to have it any way you want, how you want it, whenever you want it. And you want to know why? Because you proved to her that you love her and all you want is to be with her.”

  “So you’re saying I should stick with it?” Eli asked.

  “Do you love her?” Kieran asked.

  “More than anything.” It wasn’t a doubt in Eli’s mind.

  “Do you want to marry Faye?” Joey asked.

  “Eventually, yeah.” Eli started thinking about rings.

  “You want to pop her cherry?” Tony asked.

  The brothers glanced at each other and then at the youngest D’Amato brother. “Can somebody please…?” Nick took another sip of beer.

  Kieran reached over and popped Tony in the back of his head. “What the hell?” Tony rubbed his head. “That was an honest question!”

  Eli rolled his eyes and took a sip of his soda. “I want to be with Faith no matter what.”

  “Then, Eliodoro…” Nick laid out his cards. “You will wait and be patient. If you’re patient with her, she’ll give you so much love, you will be wondering how in the hell did a poor sap like yourself get with the most beautiful woman in the world, because you surely don’t deserve her.”

  Six

  “You know; had I known I was going to be hiking, I wouldn’t have worn sandals.” Faith complained as the rough grass and wheat brushed against her legs.

  “We’re almost there, baby girl,” Eli led the way throughout the grassland.

  “Yeah, you said that about ten minutes ago.”

  “I promise this time.”

  “Yeah, you said that about ten minutes ago.”

  To celebrate their six-month anniversary, Eli took Faith to the meadowlands in New Jersey for a romantic picnic. Going to New Jersey was a feat within itself, traveling by bus, then by train to get to their destination. Eli wanted to go all out for his girlfriend, even blindfolding her so she would have no idea what he was up to. He thought long and hard about what his brothers told him the other night and he was determined to earn Faith’s trust. He wasn’t concerned about when they were going to have sex; it was never that big of a thought in his mind. Instead, he just wanted to prove to Faith that he was different from her past boyfriends.

  “Okay, we’re here.” Eli stopped walking. “Let me just set up everything and you just wait there and be sexy.”

  “Should I strike a pose?” Faith asked.

  “You can do whatever you want, baby girl.” Eli laid out several blankets and began setting up the picnic.

  “As long as you erase the images,” Faith stated.

  “And what kind of pictures are you thinking of?” Eli asked.

  “I was thinking of something sexy like with my hands on my hips like this,” Faith posed, “or maybe blowing you a kiss like this.” She pouted her lips together.

  “Ooh, those are pretty sexy,” Eli stood back and looked at his creation.

  “Or maybe I could be buck-naked,” Faith smiled.

  “Uh-uh,” Eli replied.

  “Uh-uh, what?” Faith smiled.

  “If you’re going to be buck-naked, I’m the only one seeing that.” He walked up to her and snaked his arms around her waist. “And I have a photographic memory, too, baby girl.”

  Eli was a good foot taller than Faith and she relished him holding her. It felt like he was protecting her from harm and nothing could come between them. And when he spoke Italian to her, she swore he was trying to get into her panties without trying. “Is that right?” She smiled.

  “Sei la mia anima gemella,” Eli purred. “Il mio cuore batte solo per te.”

  “Stop talking,” Faith warned.

  Eli licked his lips. “Perché?” Why?

  “Stop talking,” Faith squirmed within his grasp. “just… just stop talking.”

  Eli laughed and gently swayed his girlfriend. “I said you were my soul-mate and that my heart only beats for you.” He kissed her temple. “Is that better in English?”

  Faith felt she could’ve melted into a puddle of, whatever, at that moment. Eli was everything to her and if she had any doubts about him waiting for her, they disappeared with his reassurances. “It sounds better in Italian. Are you going to teach our kids Italian?”

  “Of course,” he replied, “add in some Spanish when they get older and they’ll be a triple-threat.”

  “You seem to have our future all planned out, Mr. D’Amato,” Faith wondered.

  “I like to plan ahead,” Eli shrugged, “everything may not always go according to plan but at least I tried. But hey, I got everything set up now so let’s enjoy ourselves.” He removed the blindfold from Faith’s eyes. “Happy six-month anniversary, baby girl!”

  Faith was awed by the romantic display. There were fresh roses from Nicola’s garden, a box of chocolates, a bottle of sparkling apple juice, and an assortment of finger foods for them. “You know I would’ve been happy with a pizza and a movie, Eli,” she shyly smiled.

  “I know,” he nodded, “but my girl deserves only the very best and I’m going to give it to her. Now, let’s eat and enjoy our anniversary.”

  Over the next hour, the pair took turns feeding each other and conversing on a variety of topics. Eli intently listened to Faith describing a new hairstyle she learned online and was eager to try, while Faith smiled at how enthusiastic her boyfriend was at talking about graphic design and showing her drawings he took with his camera phone.

  It was at that moment Faith decided she didn’t want Eli to wait anymore. He had earned her trust and her love. Even when they had their fights, she never saw her life without him. Would she regret it? It was a possibility. But it was a chance she was willing to take. She loved Eli so much and was ready to go to the next level with him. “I’m ready, Eli.” Faith spoke.

  “Okay,” Eli got up and dusted off his jeans. He looked around at the sky and noticed it was starting to get a little dark. They would make it back before it got too late. “We should probably get going.”

  “No.” Faith shook her head. “That’s not what I meant.”

  “Well, what are you…” Eli then looked back at his girlfriend. She had a confident look on her face and reassuring look in her eyes. There was no mistake what she was referring to. He sat back down and held her hand. “Um, when?”

  “Well, I was thinking…” Faith gla
nced down at Eli’s thumb circling her hand and back into his eyes. “I was thinking now.”

  Eli’s eyebrows shot up. They were alone, in the wilderness, and far enough from anyone’s prying eyes. They were surrounded by nature and the air had a slight breeze to it, adding to the anticipation. He could admit the setting couldn’t have been more perfect. He always carried a condom on him but didn’t think he would actually use it that day. Truth be told, he wasn’t sure when he would use the condom. He would wait as long as Faith wanted him to; though he could admit he was getting anxious to make love to her.