Many a Tear has to Fall

by Joan Jonker

  There now came a pause for dramatic effect, before Lizzie carried on in a hushed tone. ‘Then suddenly, out of the darkness, came this sleigh being pulled by a reindeer. Yer can imagine me surprise, and I rubbed me eyes thinking I was seeing things. But I wasn’t, ’cos when the sleigh went past the street lamp I could clearly see Father Christmas sitting there, surrounded by sacks and parcels. I saw him as clear as day, with his red coat and hat, his round face and pure white moustache and beard. It was a wonderful sight to behold, and I was the only one in the deserted street to see it.’ Once again there was a dramatic pause, as she placed the back of her hand on her forehead and assumed a pose she’d seen Lillian Gish do in a film. Her bosom was six times that of the film star, but she heaved it none the less for good measure and said softly, ‘I was definitely the chosen one that night.’

  Lizzie then sat back in her chair and lapsed into silence as she stared into the flames licking around the pieces of coal. She was having a good laugh to herself, knowing the girls would be all keyed up waiting for her to carry on with her make-believe story. But the waiting made it all the more exciting.

  ‘Mrs Lizzie.’ Tess pulled on her skirt. ‘That can’t be the end of it, ’cos you said you had a sleigh in your back yard.’

  ‘I did have, queen, but I haven’t got it now. It was out in all weathers for years and it just rotted away.’

  But this didn’t satisfy Tess, and she wanted to know, ‘But where did you get the sleigh from, Mrs Lizzie?’

  ‘Well, where was I up to?’ Lizzie leaned forward to ruffle the girls’ hair, one very dark the other mousy. ‘Oh, I remember now. I was standing there with me eyes popping out of me head, thinking I was going round the twist, when the sleigh stopped right outside a house opposite. And who should step down but Father Christmas himself, with a big sack over his shoulder. He patted the reindeer and whispered something in his ear, then, believe it or not, he started shinning up the drainpipe to the roof. The next thing I know, he’d disappeared down one of the chimneys and I lost sight of him.’

  ‘I hope the woman opposite didn’t have a fire in the grate, Mrs Lizzie.’ Maddy was enjoying the tale, but she wasn’t living it like her sister, who was listening with mouth wide open. ‘Because Father Christmas would have got a very warm reception.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know about that, queen, ’cos I was too busy thinking how to make the best of the situation. I mean, there was me with no bleedin’ stuffing in the house, a pair of flimsy shoes on me feet and twelve inches of snow on the ground. And facing me was transport which would get me to the shop and back without getting me feet sopping wet. The trouble was, how d’yer say gee-up to a reindeer? Still, I wasn’t going to let a little thing like that stop me. And I was worried about time, ’cos I didn’t know how long Father Christmas was going to be and I didn’t want him to catch me at it in case he took all our Vera’s presents back from under the tree. So I dashed into the house, grabbed one of me home-made mince pies and hot-footed it across the street. And the reindeer must have been hungry, ’cos he wolfed it down. Mind you, even though I say it meself, I do make very good mince pies. And if yer like, Ann, I’ll make yer a batch for Christmas.’

  Maddy was watching the minutes tick by. ‘Come on, Mrs Lizzie, you can tell our mam about the mince pies when we’re in bed. Finish the story for us, please?’

  ‘I’m sorry, queen, I do ramble on a bit, don’t I? My feller’s always telling me to put a sock in it. Anyway, the reindeer was very obliging. It let me get in the sleigh and it took me up to the shop. My chest was sticking out a mile with pride, and I told everyone in the shop to look through the window and they would see a wondrous sight. But not one woman said they could see it. The miserable buggers laughed their heads off and said I was going doolally. I was that mad, I walked out of the blinkin’ shop without getting what I’d gone for. And to make matters worse, when I got outside, the flaming reindeer had done a bunk with the sleigh and I was left to trudge home with the snow coming over me ankles.’

  ‘Ah, you poor thing,’ Tess said. ‘All that and no one believing you.’

  ‘It’s not the end of the story, though, queen. Yer see, me feet were like ice, so as soon as I got in I boiled some water, poured it into the bucket, and sat with me poor feet in soak. I was sitting there nice and comfortable, with a look of bliss on me face, when there came a hammering at the door. I wasn’t going to answer it at first, but I’ve got nose fever and I couldn’t resist. So I took me feet out of the water and dripped all the way to the front door. And the surprise I got when I opened it, well, it nearly made me swallow me false teeth. For standing in front of me was Santa Claus himself, and I could smell the drink on him before he opened his mouth. He asked if he could leave his sleigh in our back yard as he was feeling tipsy with all the glasses of sherry that had been left out for him. He said he’d never be able to steer, so he’d ride the reindeer and come back for the sleigh later, when he sobered up. But he never did, and as I said, it rotted away over the years.’

  ‘That’s a lovely story, Mrs Lizzie.’ Tess sighed in appreciation. ‘It was the best yet, and I did enjoy it.’

  Maddy was giggling at her thoughts. ‘Are you sure it wasn’t you who was tipsy, Mrs Lizzie, and not Father Christmas?’

  ‘Ah, now, queen, that’s for me to know and you to find out. I made that story up in bed last night, and I thought it was pretty good.’

  ‘I think you surpassed yourself,’ George said. ‘Don’t you agree, Ann?’

  ‘It was so good it gave the girls an extra half-hour reprieve,’ his wife answered. ‘But it’s time for bed now, and I want you to go up like good girls and don’t make a fuss. You can discuss the story in bed when you’re snuggling up to keep warm. Your dad will bring you a hot drink up when you’re settled. Say goodnight to Mrs Lizzie and poppy off.’

  Ann was waiting for an opportunity to talk to Lizzie alone, and the time came when George took the girls’ drinks up. She knew he would sit on the bed and talk to them for a while so it was safe to unburden herself to the woman she regarded as a very close, dear friend. ‘I’ve tried everywhere for a job, Lizzie, but without luck. There’s too many people chasing too few jobs. And I’m getting desperate now with Christmas not far off. I don’t suppose you’ve any suggestions, have you? I’ll take anything that’s going, and I mean that. I’m four shillings behind with the rent and I’m worried sick over it. There’s no way I can make it up, it’s just hopeless. George doesn’t know, so please don’t tell him.’

  Lizzie kept her voice casual. ‘How much is the rent on this house?’

  ‘Eleven and six a week.’

  ‘Bloody hell, queen! No wonder yer can’t manage, that’s nearly half of what George earns!’ Lizzie pursed her mouth and let her breath out slowly. ‘That’s a lot of money just for rent, I’m buggered if I’d pay that out every week.’

  ‘We were getting by before, even though we didn’t have money to throw around.’ Ann’s eyes slid sideways. ‘How much rent do you pay, if you don’t mind me asking?’

  ‘Six and thruppence a week. It’s only two bedrooms and there’s no bathroom, only an outside lavvy, but it suits me.’ Lizzie decided to say what she’d been thinking for the last few weeks. ‘I’m blowed if I’d skint meself every week just because I can’t be bothered going down the yard to spend a penny. And you don’t use the extra bedroom, queen, so it’s a waste of money. Money that yer haven’t got.’

  They heard footsteps coming down the stairs and Ann put a finger to her lips. ‘Not a word, Lizzie, please. I’ll talk to you on Saturday.’

  There was a smile on George’s face when he came into the room. ‘You’ve certainly entertained the girls tonight, Lizzie, they can’t stop talking about it. And with Christmas looming up they’ll be very disappointed if Father Christmas doesn’t pay them a visit in person.’

  ‘Well, we’ll have to see what we can do, won’t we? I know where I can borrow a Santa outfit, but the moustache and beard would be more dif
ficult.’

  ‘No it wouldn’t,’ Ann said. ‘We could use cotton wool for the beard and the moustache, and put some on the front of your hair to hide the colour. I could help you with that because I did it when I was teaching. All you need to do is teasel the cotton wool to make it fluffy.’

  ‘That sounds good, queen!’ Lizzie put her hands on her tummy and grinned. ‘I’ve got the tummy for it, all I need to do is learn how to say “ho, ho, ho” in a deep voice.’

  ‘And the sack would be no problem,’ George said. ‘We could get one from work.’

  ‘Producing a sleigh would be more difficult.’ As she spoke the words, Ann was thinking it would be easier to find a sleigh than it would be to find the money for toys to fill the sack. But she didn’t want to put a damper on the evening. So she made a pot of tea and sat listening to George telling Lizzie how he was beginning to see the light on his new job. He was certainly looking better, much more fit. The extra half-hour lie-in every morning was doing him good, and he was home half an hour earlier every night. There’d be no dark clouds in their sky if it weren’t for that old enemy called money.

  Ann stood on the step the next morning waving the girls off. ‘If Miss Bond asks you, Theresa, tell her I’ll be there at ten o’clock.’

  When they turned the corner and were out of sight, she closed the door and leaned back against it. She couldn’t imagine what the headmistress would want to see her for, it had never happened before and she couldn’t help feeling apprehensive. But standing there guessing wasn’t going to get her anywhere, so she might as well get on with her work and try to put it out of her mind for the next hour. She wasn’t feeling very energetic this morning because she hadn’t slept well. Lizzie’s words kept running through her head: ‘I’m blowed if I’d skint meself every week just because I can’t be bothered going down the yard to spend a penny.’ And the difference in their rents was five shillings and threepence a week, which was a lot of money.

  Ann sighed as she climbed the stairs to make the girls’ bed. She loved this house and the area, and would hate to move away. But she might not have any choice because they couldn’t afford it. The rent man was due this afternoon and she was a shilling short. That would make her five shillings in arrears. And there was no prospect of her making it up. Something had to give, somewhere, and soon.

  ‘Come in!’ Miss Bond smiled when Ann popped her head around the door. ‘Thank you for coming, Mrs Richardson, please sit down.’

  ‘I hope it’s not trouble, Miss Bond.’ Ann sounded weary. ‘I seem to be getting more than my share of it lately.’

  ‘Far from it, dear.’ The headmistress was looking very pleased with herself. ‘In fact it’s just the opposite. I have some wonderful news for you. We had one of the school inspectors visit us a few weeks ago, and I showed him Theresa’s composition. He was very impressed and asked if he could have a copy. I believed he wanted it for himself and thought no more of it. But he called yesterday and informed me he had shown it to a friend who is editor of several magazines. His friend found it delightful and is prepared, with your permission of course, to publish it in two of their weekly magazines. If you agree, they will pay Theresa the sum of five shillings. The money will be paid to you, of course, as Theresa is under age, and you can advise her on what to spend it on.’

  ‘Oh, that’s marvellous! Oh, I’m so proud of her! And when I asked her why you wanted to see me, she said she didn’t know! She didn’t even mention it!’

  ‘Theresa doesn’t know yet, Mrs Richardson. I thought it wise not to tell her until I’d spoken to you. It was possible you might object, and that would perhaps have meant a disappointment for the child.’

  ‘I certainly have no objection, I’m delighted for her. It is something that could stand her in good stead for the future. Oh, I can’t get over it! My husband will be so pleased. And Madelaine, does she know?’

  Miss Bond shook her head. ‘You and I are the only people who know. Apart from the school inspector, but then he’s not likely to tell anyone. I’ll leave it to you as to how Theresa is told. Perhaps, now, in this office? Or would you rather wait and tell her tonight, when your husband is there?’

  ‘I think the honour of telling her should go to you, Miss Bond. After all, it was you who had faith in my daughter’s work and did something about it. I’d be more than happy for you to tell her. That’s if you want to, of course?’

  ‘It’s very kind of you, and I’d be delighted. I can’t wait to see her face. Being her mother, you will know what I mean when I say Theresa has a face that mirrors her thoughts. Open and honest. She would make a very bad poker player.’

  ‘Yes, my daughter is very innocent in many ways. She doesn’t tell untruths and unfortunately believes others are as honest as herself. I fear she will get many knocks in life unless she becomes a little harder and learns to stick up for herself. Madelaine is a good example. She is neither forward nor cheeky, but well able to fight her corner when necessary.’

  ‘Give Theresa time, Mrs Richardson, she has another three years at school yet, plenty of time to blossom. Frankly, though, I wouldn’t wish her to change too much. She has a lovely nature and that will bring her many friends.’ Miss Bond pushed her chair back and got to her feet. ‘I’ll go and fetch her. And if you have no objection I will bring Miss Harrison. She has worked hard with Theresa and I’m sure she’ll be very pleased that one of her pupils is going to have a composition printed in a magazine. Who knows, one day your daughter might be famous, Mrs Richardson.’

  When she was left alone, Ann allowed a tear to escape and trickle down her cheek. After months of worry, first with George’s accident, then concern over money, this bolt from the blue was like a ray of sunshine. And it came from a girl who had caused her and her husband so much heartache because they feared she would never have a decent future. And now she had achieved more than any of them had. This was better than one of Lizzie’s stories because this was a fairy tale come true.

  Ann shook herself when she heard voices outside. She must pull herself together and show her daughter how happy and proud she was on this special day. She could make out Theresa’s voice asking the headmistress if her mother was here yet, and saying she hoped she hadn’t done anything wrong because her mam and dad would be very upset.

  ‘You have nothing to fear, Theresa,’ Miss Bond said, her hand on the girl’s shoulder as they walked through the door, followed by Miss Harrison, whose face was wearing a puzzled expression. ‘There now, does your mother look upset?’

  ‘Hello, Mam.’ Tess looked relieved when she was greeted with a smile.

  ‘Hello, love. Miss Bond has something important to tell you.’

  ‘As there are no chairs, I’m afraid you’ll have to remain standing, Miss Harrison, but this won’t take long.’ The headmistress spread her arms and laid her hands, palms down, on the desk. And Miss Harrison, who had taught at the school for many years, thought she had never seen such a look on Miss Bond’s face before. I know I’m being stupid, she told herself, but she has the look of someone who has won a great battle.

  ‘Theresa, do you remember when you were asked to write an essay, and you chose to write about your holiday in Wales? Well . . .’

  Ann was watching her daughter’s face as the story unfolded, and saw her expression change from interest to pleasure, and then disbelief. She stood like a statue, with her eyes and mouth growing wider as the words she was hearing penetrated her mind. And when the headmistress had finished, the girl didn’t move or speak, she just stared as though in a trance.

  ‘Well, Theresa, isn’t that wonderful news?’ Miss Bond asked. ‘Have you nothing to say, or has the cat got your tongue?’

  Tess licked her lips and turned to her mother. ‘Mam, is it true?’

  ‘Of course it is, love, Miss Bond wouldn’t make up a story like that. She brought this about because she had faith in you, and you have every reason to be grateful to her.’

  Miss Harrison couldn’t contain herself
. She put her arms around Tess and hugged her. ‘It’s the best news I’ve ever heard. I am so proud that one of my pupils is to have an article published in a magazine. It’s something you only dream about.’

  Tess looked across the desk to where Miss Bond sat, and in a quiet voice said, ‘Thank you.’ Knowing those two words were inadequate, she swallowed the lump in her throat and rounded the desk. Before the bewildered headmistress knew what was happening, she was being hugged and kissed. It was the first time this had happened in her thirty years of teaching, and she found she liked it. ‘You’re very good and kind, and I’ll never forget you.’ Tess suddenly realised that kissing your headmistress wasn’t the done thing, and she sniffed up before grinning. ‘I shouldn’t have done that, but it’s your own fault for being so good to me.’

  ‘I think your mother is waiting to congratulate you, so do that before I tell you the rest of the good news.’

  ‘You mean there’s more?’ The words came out in a squeak. ‘Oh, this is going to be the best day of my life.’ The girl hastened to where Ann sat, and she knelt down and held her arms out. ‘Mam, I won’t half be able to swank now.’

  ‘That is something you should never do, love, you should just thank God for your own good luck.’

  ‘Not even a teeny-weeny bit, to Nita and Letty next door?’

  ‘Only if I’m there to make sure you don’t go overboard. Knowing what a vivid imagination you’ve got, I’d hate you to get carried away.’

  ‘Are you ready to hear the rest, Theresa?’ This was a day that would go down in Miss Bond’s diary. Many of the pupils in the Corporation school came from poor backgrounds, but every one had found employment when they’d left at fourteen. The majority in shops or factories, and some in good positions in offices. But this was the first time any girl from the school had achieved what this young girl had, and she was proud of her own part in bringing it about. ‘The publisher was quite keen and has agreed to pay the sum of five shillings for the article.’