The One I Love

by Mia Ford

  “You bill me for this don’t you,” I say.

  “Yes, fine how much this is costing us. I don’t know what you did to that girl, but if you’ve messed this up Charlie,” he doesn’t finish his sentence. He just runs a hand down his face. “I just don’t know what we’ll do,” he says finally.

  He continues to stomp around until finally, I can’t take it anymore.

  “Just go, Thomas. We’ll let someone else have the space.”

  “I booked it the whole day. You can’t just let someone else have it.”

  “She’s clearly got a good reason for not being here. You know Addy. You know she wants to do this.”

  “It doesn’t seem that way.” He leaves the room frustrated and I start to doubt that she wants to as well.

  No time like the present to work on some lyrics. I go into the booth and start to play. There’s no way I can set up the recording and perform at the same time but if we have the space I might as well use it.

  She takes her time making decisions

  Not one to rush into the room

  She finds a way to make you smile

  When you’re looking through the gloom

  The words just come to me as I play and I work out how they should sound. I don’t want to write anything overly sappy when it comes to my music. Part of the image I’m going for is keeping a hard edge. I have to throw myself under the bus some when it comes to my lyric. Somehow, I find the next part is about me and I can picture her singing it.

  He tries his best to seem immobile

  His touch ignites a flame

  He can’t get out of his own way

  And she I’m not the one to blame

  “That was good, man,” I jump not realizing Thomas has come back into the room. You’re evolving as a writer and a singer. We’ve just got to figure out what’s wrong with your muse.

  “She’s come unhinged,” I say and write that down.

  “Something, figure it out. This day will be a freebie, but we’ve got it for the next three.”

  I play for a little longer and then call her one more time. Since she once again doesn’t answer and it’s now eight o’clock, I give up. Heading to the house I pick up Chinese on the way. I feel like it’s a good night to drown myself in noodles. Surely, she’s going to have a good reason. I can’t believe she would just blow me off.

  I pick up a six pack too because I figure it’s also a good night for a beer. I wish I had a decoder for what women were thinking. I thought I had her figured out and come to find out I didn’t. After the second beer someone is knocking on my door.

  I’m thrilled convinced it’s Addy and she’s ready to tell me what’s going on. We’ll make up, make love and then sing. Everything will be okay.

  I throw the door open to find George. He’s shivering wearing a button up white shirt over a tank top both of which are dirty. His jeans are ripped and there’s blood on the knee of on leg. His eyes are wild as he walks into the apartment pushing past me. I don’t think to push him back out because I’m so shocked to see him.

  “George, what the hell?”

  He walks over to my refrigerator and takes out a beer.

  “George, put that back. We’re not friends right now. You shouldn’t be at my house right now.” I’m angry at the audacity he has to walk in and not say a word.

  “Charlie, I need a fix. I know you’ve got that coke. You don’t do it.” He’s moving towards me and he kind of puts me in the mind of a zombie hunting for brains. I wonder how many days he’s been up.

  It’s against my better judgment, but I have to tell him. I flushed the drugs when Ada came over. I didn’t want them to be in the house with her there. It wasn’t like she’d ever find them. It was just me feeling better not having it in the house.

  I’ve truly never seen someone so jazzed over coke before. I start to wonder if he’s been shooting harder drugs and smoking crack.

  “It’s gone, George. I did it. I was upset over Ada not showing up so I partied a little. I’m sorry.”

  “You’re lying, he says taking another sip of beer and pointing at me. He’s nodding and moving back and forth from foot to foot. I take a step back away from him as he continues to point. “Where is it, Charlie? I’m going to tear this place up. Just give it to me, you know I can’t help it.”

  Now the heat is rising in my body and my fists are clenching. How dare he come into my home and threaten me.

  “You can help it, George. You can help it by not being a junkie. I don’t know what you’ve been shooting but you’ve never been like this over coke. I flushed it. Is that what you want to hear. I flushed it. It’s not here anymore.”

  George starts to shake and grabs the front of my shirt. He shakes me and his mouth turns into a snarl.

  “Why would you do that, you idiot. You could have given it to me.”

  I take his hands off my shirt and shove him as hard as I can towards my door.

  “Get the hell out of my apartment. Don’t you ever come back here George. Do you understand me.”

  He stumbles back and looks dumbfounded. Realization seems to hit him as I walk him backward the rest of the way to the door.

  “I’m sorry Charlie. That wasn’t a good thing. Let me start over.”

  I slam the door in his face. I’m shaking with anger. What if he led Corky right to my house? I was safe here and now I could possibly be in danger.

  I want to see Ada. I contemplate what might happen if I just go to her house. She won’t like that. She is a girl who likes to know what’s going on. I war with myself back and forth drinking my beer and pacing in my kitchen.

  She may not like it and she may not want me to, but I’m going to her house. I want her to know I’m there for her even if she decides to push me away. I can’t fix whatever’s changed in such a short time if she won’t talk to me. I go get my personal car and start the drive to her house. It’s getting close to eleven and I know she’s probably already asleep since she has class tomorrow, but I can’t help myself.

  I make my way up to her door and find my heart is beating really hard.

  “Addy, let me in I want to see you.” I knock again and still get no answer. I knock louder. Her neighbors are going to start to get upset.

  “Charlie, go away.” I finally got a response and it’s not a great one, but it’s a response.

  “What do you mean? Talk to me, Ada. Tell me why you changed your mind.” Yelling through the door is drawing attention now. There is a door cracked down the hallway.

  “I just did Charlie. Please leave.”

  “Did you change your mind about me too?” My breath catches in my chest. I don’t want to know her answer.

  “Yes,” I hear footsteps as she runs away and a door slam inside the apartment. I hit the door hard in frustration and then make my way out as more doors open.

  I don’t understand what could have happened. There wasn’t any difference between yesterday and today. I didn’t call her until five but I’d kissed her goodbye this morning. The only thing I can think to do is go to the bar. So that’s what I do.

  I avoid any bars I’ve been to before and I’m surprised when I walk in to find Paulie at this one. I didn’t know he drank. I slide into the barstool beside him and the two of us drink together for a while.

  I tell him all about my issues with George and Ada. I feel like unloading on him is unfair, but I really look at him like a father figure. I certainly don’t have a real one in my life. He listens and drinks. It’s a nice night. After a while, he leaves to go home to his wife and I stay drinking and reflecting on everything I did and everything I said to Ada.

  I’ve never let a girl get to me like she is. It’s unnerving and I don’t like it.

  After a few drinks and more missed calls from George, I take a cab home, throw my phone in the toilet and fall face first into bed.

  At three in the morning, I awake suddenly. I’ve been having a nightmare of Ada being at Corkys with me. I blame George and then I re
member I threw my phone in the toilet.

  I’m pleased to find I just threw it at the toilet and thankfully it went into the trash can. I check it for messages from Ada. The hangover is already starting. I will figure this out.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Ada

  Tuesday, I just go through the motions at work. I don’t want to think about Charlie and he’s all I can think about. I get to substitute for a nicer teacher. Mrs. Martinez is a nice older teacher who doesn’t secretly hate me while pretending to be nice. It doesn’t help that I’m hungover and perhaps a little bit still drunk when I get to the school. I decide I need to go get some coffee before I start a new adventure in substituting.

  I will say since I talked down to the blondies and told Madeline’s class I’d make them have Saturday detention they haven’t really spoken to me. It’s nice. After homeroom, I teach her math class. By teach I mean I supervise while they do the assignment she left. I’m a terrible math person. I can barely add and subtract. Fortunately, they don’t require you to be good at math to sub for a math class.

  Before I know it, I’m having a quiet lunch at the desk and catching up on my reading. I’ve only thought about Charlie three times in the past hour. My music class isn’t until one so I decide to go walk the track and get in some much-needed exercise.

  I immediately regret my decision having forgotten it’s free period for the English teachers and they are there in their matching tracksuits, a rainbow of spandex and sweatbands. Each of them is very fit and a little intimidating when you look at their bodies. I am just walking in the dress pants and shirt I wore to work. I wasn’t planning on working up enough of a sweat to make workout clothes necessary. They’re definitely going to make me look bad.

  I head to the track passing them as they stretch. Making it a full lap before they actually start walking gives me hope they will just ignore me. I have no such luck as they immediately catch up.

  “So, word on the street is you’re seeing Charlie Maxwell,” Madeline says as she walks beside me. Hallie and Penny are on the other side so I’m trapped in a blond sandwich. Each of their water bottles filled with ice clink as they move their arms walking fast. I find myself speeding up to keep up with them and wonder how that happened.

  I don’t want to answer her. Who says word on the street? They’re always trying to sound much cooler than they are.

  “We’re seeing each other. Or we were seeing each other, it’s complicated.” I close my eyes wishing I could take that back. Like a snake seeing a mouse, Madeline attaches herself to that statement and a large smile spreads across her face.

  “Oh my, he’s quite the bad boy I’ve heard. I guess you couldn’t keep up. Not that I blame you, Ada, believe me. You’re a nice girl.”

  I know she’s not being nice, she’s being the opposite of nice. I hate the way the three of them disguise their complete bitchiness with what they think sounds like compliments.

  “Actually, I can handle it. He’s amazing in bed and sure I don’t like some of the things he gets into but as long as he doesn’t bring them home to me, what’s it matter? When we sing together it’s hot. He’s writing me a song, so yeah there’s a little thing we’re working out right now, but believe me, I can handle him.”

  Their mouths are open and I walk off the track. I can’t believe I said any of that. Who am I? Where did that come from? I’d lied, he’s not writing me a song. At least, I don’t think he is. I’m also not speaking to him right now, we may never speak again. Madeline will find that out. I can’t believe I let them get under my skin.

  Now I’m thinking about Charlie again. I’m thinking about his body and his lips as I walk back towards the school. I’m debating not going home because he is going to try and find me. On the one hand, it’s cool that he wants to see me so bad, but I don’t want him getting hurt so I have to try and figure this out.

  I really need to talk to Lila, I can’t figure out why she’s not been available to me. I assume it’s Thomas. She really likes him.

  As I head towards my classroom, I hear music. It’s not a song we’ve been working on, but all the students are singing. As I get closer I realize it’s a song I’ve heard before. They’re singing Bring on the Water.

  That means he’s here, I can’t see him. I freeze and listen to the students. They are singing the whole song, both parts. How long has he been here? How did he get them to class early? How did he teach them the song in such a short period of time? There are so many questions.

  I have to go in. I walk in and prepare for battle. He can’t be here and I need to get him to leave. It’s really going to suck to do this in front of my students. They all have pieces of paper and sound fantastic as they sing the song. Any other time I’d be thrilled to death.

  “This song is great Ms. Springfield,” Sarah says as soon as they finish. “You are going to sound so great singing it.”

  “You shouldn’t come in here and compromise my students like this,” I say trying to sound cold.

  “What should I do Addy, you won’t talk to me?”

  “Me not talking to you should have been a hint that I don’t want to talk to you right now Charlie. You should have taken it.” I am losing my confidence and just hoping he gets angry enough to leave. He’s still standing in front of the students who are all staring at me. I guess I do look like a lunatic.

  “I’m not going away Ada, don’t you want a guy who will stand up for you? Who will fight?” I’ve noticed he doesn’t call me Addy when he’s getting really serious. It’s almost the equivalent of your mom using your full name when you’re in trouble.

  “I can’t do this Charlie,” I say and walk out of the room before the tears start to fall.

  He follows me out into the hall. “Talk to me.”

  “They’re going to kill you, Charlie. Okay. Is that what you want to hear? My dad and Jimmy they’re going to kill you. If I sing with you, they’re going to kill you.”

  “That’s what this is about?” He moves towards me and I feel his arms wrap around me. I lean back into him.

  “Yes, I want to protect you.”

  “Let them try to come after me. Just let them. I’m not scared. You’re not going to let them keep us apart and you’re not going to let them scare you out of pursuing your dreams. You love to sing and you’re good.”

  “Thank you. I just don’t know that it’s worth putting your life at risk.” I’m so afraid of what they’ll do if they come into town.

  “They’re making empty threats Ada. They aren’t going to do anything. Everything will be okay. You’ll see. If they even make a move in that direction, we’ll handle it. My dad is a dick, but he won’t let anything happen to his only son.”

  I lean my head on his shoulder. I’m not convinced, but he seems so sure.

  “We’ve got the studio for the next few days. Let’s just go in there and sink ourselves into making music. We’ll write and sing and when we come out we’ll have created something beautiful.”

  I nod and he pulls me to him kissing me. I hear my students chuckling from the doorway of the classroom.

  “We have time for a quickie?” He whispers in my ear.

  I notice Hallie standing at the end of the hallway watching us. I kiss Charlie anyway letting her get a good eyeful. Let her go back and report to Madeline that I’m being inappropriate in the hallway, who cares?

  “No, I have to teach class,” I whisper back. Maybe later I think though. I want to try having sex in a car, and a bathtub, and so many other places now that I know how awesome it is. I want to be adventurous and I want to be that way with Charlie.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Charlie

  The past couple of days have been great. Ada and I have been clicking and while I’ve been keeping my eyes out for trouble, I’m not too concerned about her dad and ex-boyfriend coming after us.

  I’ve been more concerned about having to avoid George. I wouldn’t put it past him to just show up with Corky when he gets despe
rate. The last thing I need is to bring him around my kids. I wish George didn’t know where my studio was so he couldn’t find me.

  We’ve got class with the students this afternoon and after we plan on going back into the studio. I moved class to Thursday this week so we could get in the extra time. I can’t put them off anymore.

  It's going to be a good class with Ada. I think I've almost convinced her to sing with the students. I go and have a sandwich with Paulie. I can tell he's surprised that I actually kept my end of the bargain. This time I don't try to get any information out of him. We just talk. I tell him about the recording and he tells me about his grandkids.

  Once I'm done with that I go into town to shop for the studio. We need some small things like stands for the kid’s music, guitar picks, and strings. Once I'm done there it's almost time to head to class so I just go over early and work on the song I've been writing for Ada. It's going to be a surprise for her. It started with the verses I'd written for both of us and Thomas's unhinged muse comment and it just came to me. It's been through three rewrites now and I still don't think it's perfect.

  Ada shows up a little after all the kids. I'm secretly glad because Sheila was in rare form and had her breasts pushed up by some device. She kept leaning into me and touching me with them. Thomas comes in a little after we get started with a few chords. I wasn't expecting him so I make a big deal introducing them to my agent. They think that's the coolest thing in the world.