Always On My Mind: A Bad Boy Rancher Love Story (The Dawson Brothers Book 1)

by Ali Parker

  They pulled through the trees, Jason rolling down the window and leaning out a little, a laugh coming from him. The wind blew his hair and chill bumps broke out on the strong muscles of his arms. How he was an accountant was beyond her. He looked like he’d walked off the pages of GQ. She ignored the call of her desire to keep watching him, to make him aware of her thoughts. Instead she looked toward the front window and pointed toward the lake.

  “There’s a little lake back there that I cleared a few weeks ago so I could eventually get a duck or two and maybe even a few fish.”

  “You fish?” He sounded incredulous.

  She huffed as he stopped the truck. “Of course I fish. I was raised in Conroe, just up the road. You either fish or you’re bored out of your mind all summer.”

  He laughed and got out of the truck, moving around to open the door she was already slipping out of. She took off his jacket and offered it to him. He threw it in the cab of the truck and shut the door, following her toward the mostly constructed house.

  “You never cease to amaze me. Here I didn’t think it was possible to like you more, and then you throw out that you like to fish.” He acted like he was swooning and she laughed, unable to contain a reaction to his silliness.

  “The house has been a long, painful process.”

  “How so?” he asked, moving up to open the door for her. It wouldn’t budge, which was a good thing since the fixtures were supposed to be in and the electricity was supposed to be turned on. The house should be locked, and half of the problem with her previous contractor was that he was always late on his promises and he never locked the door.

  She pulled the keys out of her pants pocket and moved in front of Jason, the wind picking up and bringing the scent of pure male toward her. She breathed in deeply and turned over her shoulder to look at him as the lock clicked and she pushed the door open. “What kind of cologne do you wear?”

  He smiled and moved in behind her. “You like it?”

  She laughed and moved into the house. “No, it smells like cat pee.”

  He grabbed his T-shirt, pulling it up and smelling the top of it, his motions exposing the tanned skin of his muscular abs. She almost groaned at the sight of such beauty, a slim dusty trail of hair going from his navel to disappear into the top of his jeans. She looked away as her cheeks heated, her footsteps quick as she approached the kitchen.

  He walked in behind her, moving into the living room where she couldn’t see him, but could only hear his voice. “Are you serious about the cologne? That shit’s getting thrown out!” His voice was high pitched, as if he were a whiny girl, and it made her laugh.

  Where had this guy been for the last year? Had she really shut him out to the point of not realizing someone so funny, kind and entertaining was sitting in the next room? Had her focus been so much on repelling him that she’d failed to even consider liking him?

  “Well?” He turned the corner and leaned against the wall. The house was open and spacious, and he seemed to fit all too well in it.

  She shook her head, another small giggle leaving her. “No, you smell divine.” She closed her eyes and shook her head again, the look one of surrendered denial.

  He laughed and walked closer, stopping just in front of her. She opened her eyes and started to move back, only to find a countertop pressing into her back. The thought of turning to her left or right was attractive, but not as much as the strong male who towered above her. She looked up at him and studied him, her head tilted toward the ceiling. He seemed to be doing the same, and the desire to kiss him ran all over her nerve endings. It would be a fantastic idea and a horrible one combined.

  “I’m glad you like it. It’s not cologne.”

  She smiled, waiting for the silly joke. He was the one that moved back a little, both giving relief and disappointing her, but she’d made the rules and he seemed to be forcing himself to follow them.

  “What is it?”

  “I just wear deodorant, so it’s that or my skin, I guess.” He smiled and turned, walking from the room. “Come show me your bedroom. I’m dying to see where we’re going to make the babies.”

  She yelped and then laughed at how ridiculous he was. Moving behind him, she scanned the unfinished floors and took note of the various things that she needed to talk with the contractor about. The house should have been ready to move into by now, and yet she knew she was looking at another month at best, depending on the speed and qualifications of this new contractor. Hopefully he would be reasonable and fast.

  Jason had disappeared into one of the smaller bedrooms, the sound of his feet giving her the comfort of knowing someone else would be here with her when trying to deal with the caveman that would most certainly show up in a few minutes. She was more than capable of handling everything on her own, and yet, thanks to society’s view of women, she needed Jason here to get anywhere with the construction company owner. Of that she was sure.

  She bent down a little to see as she heard the sound of tires moving up the drive. A large red pickup truck pulled up and parked next to Jason’s. She walked toward the bedroom that Jason was in and smiled at the sight of him lying on the hard concrete floor.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Imagining things.” He rolled over and got up, turning to face her with his cheeks colored pink.

  She rolled her eyes and walked toward him to slap at him for being so childish, but he grabbed her hands and pulled her toward him, stopping as they collided into one another. Her breath caught, but she let herself go in the moment.

  Whatever will be will be.

  “What am I?”

  “What?” she asked, confusion pressing across her senses.

  “Am I your boyfriend or your brother?”

  She pulled back, but he held on tight. “What are you talking about?”

  “Contractor’s here, Becca. Am I your brother today or am I playing your boyfriend?”

  She smiled as she realized what he was saying. “Oh, crap. My boyfriend.”

  “Good answer.” He smiled and pulled her arms, wrapping them around his muscular waist as he wrapped her in a hug and pressed his lips to hers. The sound of footsteps didn’t matter at all to her. The soft flavor of mint swept across her tongue as she lifted up on her toes and enjoyed the soft wetness of his lips.

  “Becca?”

  The voice behind her was the same voice she’d heard on the phone yesterday, and it was as familiar now as it had been sixteen years ago when he’d ripped her heart out.

  Kade.

  Chapter 11

  Rebecca pulled back from the kiss. It was obvious that the look on her face alarmed Jason. She turned in his arms and did what she always did when emotions beat over her like ice water—she faked it. A warm smile spread across her face as she moved toward Kade and gave him a quick hug, which he tried to extend a little too long.

  “Wow. It’s a small world.” She laughed, her heart breaking into a million pieces as the one man she’d have done anything for stood in front of her, looking a little shocked. Did he think she would have waited for him? Just stayed by the front porch looking for his sorry—

  You basically did.

  Jason moved in beside her and extended his hand toward Kade. “Hi. I’m Jason, Becca’s boyfriend.”

  She almost corrected him, not wanting Kade to think she was with someone else, but a plan was a plan, and she certainly didn’t want to embarrass Jason. She smiled and wrapped an arm around his waist as Kade introduced himself.

  “Kade McMillian. Becca was my best friend in high school.” He nodded and then looked back toward Rebecca. “You look fantastic. I’d heard you were doing well for yourself, but there wasn’t any mention of a boyfriend.”

  She smiled and looked up at Jason, his gaze questioning at best. “Well, I guess you’re only getting half the story.” She laughed and shrugged her shoulders. “As old as I am, you’d think I’d have a husband, not a boyfriend.”

  Jason squeezed her softly to
his side. “You will soon, if I have any say in it.”

  Kade’s smile dropped and he nodded. “I see.”

  She let the awkward silence sit for a few lingering seconds before motioning toward the open door. “Well, I assume you’re here as the contractor that’s going to help me get all of this cleaned up and functioning?”

  He nodded and moved back, motioning for her and Jason to go through the door first. “I’m your guy.”

  She walked through the door with so many thoughts racing through her mind. Why was fate so cruel that it would allow her to contemplate something with Jason, only to run into Kade the moment she decided that yes, she wanted to try this thing out? Why was he here now in his jeans and tight T-shirt, his gaze hot and needy, his voice a soothing comfort from her past?

  He left, remember?

  He had left, but they were just stupid kids then. They were adults now, and things could be different, but did she want them to be? She walked numbly toward the living room, Jason falling back to talk with Kade about a few of the things left undone in the house. She glanced back to see Kade taking a few notes, his eyes moving up to catch her gaze as her heart pounded a few times in her chest. The what if’s between them were painfully obvious.

  Jason pulled his phone from his pocket and walked toward Rebecca, leaning over to kiss her cheek. “Be right back. My sister’s calling, which is never good.”

  “Okay,” she whispered and pressed her back to the countertop in the kitchen as Kade walked toward her. An uneasy smile spread on his face and a thousand accusations rose in her throat, but giving him the knowledge that he mattered so much almost seemed like a loss of power.

  “I can’t believe we’re standing here together. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve thought of you over the years.” He smirked, the expression bringing back a thousand memories.

  “Why didn’t you call or visit? All those years of being close and then … nothing.” She shrugged her shoulders, praying to God to save her from years of tears that seemed to be building up just below the facade she clung so tightly to.

  “I … I don’t know. I guess I thought you wanted a relationship when I left, and I think some part of me did too, but I needed the freedom to figure out who I was and stuff.” He took a shaky breath.

  The realization that this wasn’t easy for him did nothing to soothe her.

  “So how did all of that go? Hollywood and the band and stuff?” She smiled, swallowing the heaviness of everything and praying like hell that Jason would give her a minute.

  “It went well for a while, but like everything, it took a piece of me, one I’m glad is gone.” He tapped the board in front of him, his eyes glued to her as if he were looking at a ghost. “I want to take you out.”

  She coughed, her hand coming up to cover her mouth. “I’m sorry, what?”

  “I want to go out and catch up. I want to hear where you’ve been and how you came to this place in your life. I want to share my story with you. You know, catch up.” He moved another step closer and she lifted her hand.

  “No closer.”

  He nodded. “I understand. I’m not here to push anything, I just know that I want to catch up and let you make the call about what happens next.”

  What happens next? Next he would win her heart back, which didn’t feel like it would be much of a challenge to her, and then he’d walk away and take her happiness with him. No thanks.

  “Yeah. Let’s focus on the house and what needs to happen to get me in it, and the catching up thing can be a topic of conversation for another time.”

  He nodded, his expression sobering to a facade much like hers. He pointed to the living room as Jason came back in, a troublesome expression on his handsome face. He walked toward Becca and smiled.

  “Everything okay with your sister?” she asked, reaching out to take his hand, simply needing the comfort of another person while she walked next to her greatest fantasy and worst nightmare.

  “Not really, but I’ll fill you in later.” He lifted her fingers to his lips and kissed them softly, walking beside her with his eyes opened wide and mouth running with everything wrong in the house.

  They’d only been work associates twenty-four hours earlier, and now they were at least friends. She would bet that they’d graduate to being lovers rather soon, too, if he kept being so incredibly funny, sensitive and caring. The fact that he looked like a model and smelled like heaven didn’t help at all.

  All of that might have been, but now … she watched Kade in action, his determination to work alongside Jason to figure out exactly what needed to be done to take care of her was touching and overwhelming. She was fighting against tears with everything she had in her, the strain of emotion exhausting her.

  Rebecca stopped by an open window in the master bedroom, the guys moving down the hall while still going over things in the house. Pulling the window opened, she squatted down and breathed in the fresh, chilled air of morning, her eyes moving toward the canopy of trees that sat just in front of the house.

  Why? Why is he here now? What does he want?

  It was obvious that his job had brought him here, but was it possible that he’d applied to come back here for her, or was it just a transfer? Was he here to try and reconcile things with her? And reconcile what? The friendship or something more? He said he wanted to reconnect and she could choose how far they were to go.

  “What the hell does that mean?” she murmured and pulled out her phone, texting Trisha that they were going dancing tonight. She needed time with her best friend. Trisha would know what to do, she always did.

  “I think we covered everything. Becca, you want to look over the list before we leave?” Jason’s voice brought her back from her thoughts, her knees cracking a little as she stood. She leaned over and rubbed them, her eyes moving from one love interest to the other.

  “Yeah sure. Let me see the list.” She walked toward them as Kade extended the checklist, her gaze remaining on the sheet of paper and not on the boy that stole her heart years before. She skimmed the list, trying hard to concentrate on the matter at hand. Getting into the house was her top priority, outside of making sure her company didn’t fall to pieces around her, which didn’t seem to ever be the case. Where business was concerned, she had it together. It was her love life that made her want to pull her hair out in chunks.

  “Everything okay on there? Anything else you want to tell me about your past contractor experiences?” Kade’s voice tugged at her and she looked up at him, shaking her head.

  “No. The guy was slow and uncooperative. I should’ve been in the house a month ago, and I assume this will take another month.” She handed him the list and looked around the bedroom, a sense of longing to be in the house washing over her. She’d never really had a place of her own that didn’t have rowdy neighbors with all-night parties occurring every night of the week.

  “Two weeks at worst. I promise.” Kade took the paper and smiled at her, the reassurance in his words causing emotions to tug at her.

  “See, baby. Helps to have an old friend in the contractor business.” Jason moved in and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him and nodded.

  “Yep. Sure does.” She looked up at Jason. “You ready to get out of here?”

  He winked at her. “Sure am. I’ll meet you at the truck.”

  “I just need you to sign right here, Becca.” Kade held out a form with the checklist clipped to it. “Shouldn’t be too long and I’ll have you in here.”

  She nodded and reached for the pen, ignoring the rough sensation of his finger brushing against hers. There was a time that she’d have paid loads of money to feel those hands all over her. Yeah, like yesterday.

  She snorted softly at her wayward thoughts and signed the paper, the look on Kade’s handsome face causing her to pause before she left. “What?”

  “How long have you been dating Junior?”

  She smiled, knowing that the age thing wasn’t just something she
was going to have to combat within herself, but that others would sense it and see it too. She tilted her head a little, studying her lost love and thinking about how to answer.

  “Long enough to invite him to meet with the contractor on my house.”

  He flinched and nodded his head once. “That was fair.”

  “Damn straight.” She pulled another set of keys from her pocket and dropped them on the clipboard. “These are the contractor’s set. Use them as you will, but if my car is out front, don’t come in here without knocking. And don’t leave my house unlocked, ever.”

  He took the keys and slipped them in his pocket. “Got it. I’ll call you about that dinner.”

  “What dinner?” she asked, backing up slowly as she studied him, her blood pressure rising at the very thought of going to dinner with him. All those years of wanting to have him back in her life and convincing herself that he was the one for her. Now he stood before her and she was honestly too in shock to reconcile the feelings that rushed through her.

  “That dinner where you and I catch up.” He winked and turned his back on her, walking to the living room and bending over to inspect a small crack in the bottom of the wall. She stood there a few more moments, admiring the curve of his backside and the strong muscles of his arms. He was just as gorgeous as he’d always been, but he wasn’t a boy anymore, and she wasn’t just a simple girl.

  She turned on her heel and walked out to the vehicle, Jason moving to open her door and offering her a hand to help her get inside. He shut the door and walked around the front of the truck and got in, a smile on his face as he looked over at her.

  “You okay?” He started the truck and looked over his shoulder as he backed it up.

  She buckled and reached for the heater. “Yeah, why do you ask?”

  “Well for one, I kissed you without permission, and two, that wasn’t just a good friend from high school, was it?” He put the truck in gear and pulled out, a soft caring look on his handsome face.

  “The kiss was nice, and actually that’s all he was. I thought for a long time that I wanted him to be more, but we were only friends, and that’s how the relationship ended. Just friends.” She sighed and pulled her phone out of her pocket, checking for Trisha’s reply and slipping the device into her purse.