Making Peace

by Sasha Goldie

  "Just thinking about what you said.” I watched his profile as the scenery sped by.

  "Which part?"

  "The part about not going anywhere. Carson, let me ask. Think hard, try to be honest. And you don't even have to answer me right now. If I had two good legs, and we got in a wreck on the way home, and I lost a leg, what would you do?”

  His brow furrowed, but he looked down at his speedometer. “Is the wreck my fault?" he asked immediately.

  "Oh, no. Say I got in a wreck and you weren't around."

  Nodding, he pursed his lips and didn't reply as we pulled onto Main Street. "And we're just starting to date?"

  I wanted to say no, that he should imagine we were in a deeply committed relationship, but that would really give away the reason I asked him to consider my question. Plus, if he answered favorably, that would tell me a lot more about him.

  "Okay, do you want to know what I'd do in the immediate moment, or how I'd respond to the relationship from that point forward?"

  "Respond to the relationship," I said simply and waited on him to think. No pressure, but if he said the wrong thing, our whole potential dating situation would go straight down the toilet. He'd disappointed me in life once already. The pressure was on.

  "So, trying to be totally honest with myself, if I really liked a guy the way I do you, and I wanted to pursue a relationship, I can't imagine doing anything to change the direction the relationship would be headed. I mean, maybe even the accident would speed things up."

  "What do you mean?" I hadn't expected that.

  "Well, I tried to imagine abandoning you, and moving on with life, but I just can't see myself doing that." He pulled into Ian's parking lot and took off his seatbelt, turning toward me. "What you'd be going through would be unbelievable. Beyond difficult. There would be no reason we couldn't still get to know each other. And in that situation, you had a lot of free time, right? Once you passed the initial stage of being out of it and in so much pain you couldn't focus, of course."

  I nodded. There had been a stage between utter devastation and starting the physical recovery process that I'd been very bored and would've loved a distraction from the pain. Instead, I had to also mourn the loss of the relationship I'd hoped to be in for the rest of my life.

  "Yeah, I can't see me breaking it off for that reason. Obviously, there are still other things that could happen to stop a relationship's progress, but that wouldn't be it. Not for me."

  He cocked his head at me. "Is there a specific reason you asked me that?"

  Sucking in a deep breath, I smiled at him with my hand on the door handle. "Yes." Opening the door, I slid out of the truck and slammed the door, giving Carson a huge, happy smile and a wave. My heart raced. His reply had been perfect. He couldn't have answered better if he'd had the ability to read my mind for the right words to say.

  Of course, he could've just been saying what I wanted to hear, but I didn't think so. Carson had made a mistake when we were kids, but he still was one of the best people I'd ever known before that. And apparently after, as well. I walked into the shop whistling, a spring in my step that had nothing to do with the gears on my leg. Ian looked up from the car he was working on.

  "What's got you in such a good mood?" he asked with a smile that looked a little bit too knowing.

  "Friends," I said as I passed him to go upstairs. "Good friends."

  14

  Carson

  Halfway through my shift, I got a text. The Wi-Fi in the brewery made sure that most people's phones worked here, which was why I paid a premium for the best router and fastest service I could get. We frequently had customers simply because we had good Wi-Fi.

  The buzz in my pocket didn't let up until I took my phone out and checked it.

  Max: You wanna come over for some FWB action later?

  Carson: FWB?

  Max: Friends With Benefits.

  Duh. I felt silly for not realizing what it was.

  Carson: Sounds good. You sure? It'll be late and it's your night off.

  Max: I'm sure.

  The rest of my shift went by in a blur. All I could think about was Max. What would we do, what would we say, how much fun it would be.

  Finally, the time came to close the bar. I tried not to rush everyone as they cleaned up, and eventually, finally, I locked the door.

  Time for some FWB action.

  I practically skipped to the truck, then forced myself to drive at normal speed all the way to Max's apartment. His lights were still on above the shop. He was definitely waiting for me.

  The shop was dark, but I got out and tried the door. Locked. Pulling out my phone, I shot off a text to Max.

  Carson: Hey, it's locked down here.

  Max: Oops. Coming.

  The door opened soon, revealing a grinning Max. "Hey," he said softly. "Come in."

  As soon as the door shut behind me, he was on me. His hands roamed my body as he pressed his lips against mine, demanding and greedy.

  He pressed me against the shop wall, my head knocking against a picture frame. I managed to scoot us over a little, then lost myself in his touch. The dark shop added to the feeling of urgency. We could barely see each other. The street lights a bit farther down Main Street were too far away to provide any illumination through the windows.

  Max's hands went immediately to my waist, finding my belt and unbuckling it as he trailed his lips down my neck.

  As he shoved his hand into my jeans and closed it around my already hard cock, he bit my neck. I gasped. Nobody had ever bitten me there before. It was shockingly erotic.

  He licked the spot where his teeth had given me a mix of pleasure and pain, soothing it before moving up my neck again and claiming my mouth.

  Max gave me no options but to let him lead. I was along for the ride, not an unpleasant thought, but I owed him an orgasm. I put my hands on his shoulders, moaning as he unbuttoned my jeans and slid them down my thighs enough to pull my dick out of my underwear.

  His strokes were sure. He knew exactly how to work me for maximum pleasure. "I wanted you to do this to me so badly in high school," I whispered. "I wish I'd had the nerve back then to admit how I felt."

  "Me, too," his husky voice replied. "I used to jack off and think about you, what it would be like to be with you like this." He stopped my reply by kissing me frantically again.

  I pushed him back. "I owe you an orgasm," I said firmly. Grabbing his waistband, I felt elastic. He was wearing sports shorts.

  Good. Easy access. I jerked them down and dropped to my knees, my hard dick waving in the warm shop air. I left it hanging out. With one hand on his base, I took him into my mouth.

  I loved giving blowjobs. Every boyfriend and fling I'd ever had, I'd always enjoyed it. This time was no different. Max's hand immediately went into my hair, tightening and loosening as I moved. The more he enjoyed it, the more his fingers clamped down on my strands. As I worked his dick, I stroked my own, but my focus was on Max.

  Calming my gag reflex, I slid him deep down my throat, pulling all of him into my mouth, which wasn't an easy feat. He wasn't exactly a small man.

  I couldn't wait to have him inside me.

  Before he came, he tugged on my hair, pulling my mouth off of him. "I want to come with you," he said. He pulled me to my feet and moved us in the dark until I felt a chair against the back of my legs. I heard him rustle, then his mouth was on the head of my cock.

  Groaning, I touched him anywhere I could reach him. "There's a better way to do this," I whispered. "Can we go upstairs?"

  He moaned, the vibrations of his voice washing over my cock like a pleasure wave. I wouldn't last long at this rate. "Max," I said between sucking in huge breaths.

  He lifted his head. "Okay, come on." Taking my hand, he pulled me up. I yanked my pants up and let him lead me upstairs to his bedroom. His rumpled bed looked like heaven because I knew what we were going to do in it.

  Max pulled a bottle of lube out of his bedside table a
nd turned to me, our cocks touching as they waited on attention. He slicked up his hand and grabbed me as he handed the bottle off. "Are you okay with this for tonight?" he asked, eyes full of vulnerability.

  "Yes," I said. I didn't mind going slow. If we waited to fuck another night, it would just build the anticipation. I squirted some of the lube into my hand and grabbed him, stroking his cock against mine with one hand. I put the other on his neck, pulling him to me so I could taste him as I stroked his dick.

  We never even made it to the bed.

  Our breathing intensified in tandem.

  "Carson," Max whispered when I was close to squirting my orgasm all over him. "Swallow it."

  He let go of me so I could drop to my knees, which I did gladly, the desire to obey his command strong. Would I enjoy a little dom and sub play?

  Maybe. I noticed scars on his hip as I took him into my mouth but paid them no attention. He'd tell me about them eventually, I was sure. In the meantime, they had nothing to do with what he wanted me to do.

  I sucked his cum out of him like it would quench my deep thirst. The feeling of his cum hitting the back of my throat made me moan around his dick. As soon as he was done, he pulled me to my feet and dropped to his knees, returning the favor. I came in his mouth with my fingers gripping his face. All I wanted to do was pull him up and kiss him tenderly, showing my affection and appreciation for him and his generosity. But that wouldn't be appropriate at this juncture.

  After kicking off my shoes, I grabbed Max's hand, pulling him up as I backed up to the bed. Max collapsed beside me on the comforter, and even though we were only supposed to be friends, I pulled him close, halfway on top of me, and kissed him softly. "That was nice," I said, closing my eyes. My heart beat a rhythm under Max, bringing tears to my closed eyes, though I didn’t let them fall. I'd missed my friend more than I realized, so many years later. I thought back on my friends since hurting and losing Max. None had been as close as he’d been. But that had been my fault. I'd closed myself off. Having him in my life again made me feel open and free. Maybe soon, he'd feel the same way.

  The next morning, I woke up to find us in the exact same position. Max's face was totally relaxed as he drooled on my shoulder, which was so asleep I wanted to cry. It would be a bitch to wake up.

  "Hey," I said softly. "You gotta get off of me."

  Max made a little snorting sound and closed his mouth, his eyes not even opening as he rolled over. He'd kicked his shorts off at some point while I'd sucked his dick before, and he was asleep stark naked. He must've gotten up at some point, though, because his leg was off.

  I took a moment to look at it while he wouldn't know. There were fewer scars than I would've imagined. It had been several years, though, maybe some had faded. The white lines across his skin begged to be traced, but that might be more than he was ready for.

  My phone beeped quietly from my pocket. Shit. Pulling it out, I gaped at it when I saw the time. I was supposed to be back at the brewery a half-hour ago. Corey had been blowing my phone up. He was headed there to let the construction crew in, and he was worried something was wrong with me.

  I called his cell, but it went to voicemail, which made sense if he was driving to the brewery. "Max," I whispered at his back, leaning over. "I've got to run to work."

  He rolled, still without opening his eyes, and smiled as he puckered his lips. I gave him a soft kiss. "Talk to you later," he said in a sleepy voice. I stood and adjusted my clothes before hightailing it out the door.

  The drive to work gave me time to contemplate the night before.

  It had been one of the best sexual experiences of my life, and we didn't even get to the actual fucking.

  Being just friends with benefits was going to be more difficult than I thought.

  15

  Max

  Carson had a construction mess to deal with over the next few days thanks to a mistake made by the first contractor. The kitchen had to be redone on one end. That made him fairly unavailable for about a week. I'd asked him if he wanted to get together after work, but he'd begged off. I would've been hurt, but he'd sincerely seemed regretful.

  At work, we stole a few moments here and there to embrace and say hello to each other, but I knew it was important to him to stay on top of the fixes since it was done incorrectly the first time, so I didn’t pressure him to spend time with me.

  Thursday as I cleaned my section and got ready to go home, Pearl stopped by on her way out. "You coming to the barbeque Sunday?"

  What was with this town and doing barbeques?

  "I hadn't heard about it," I said, hoping to find a way to gracefully get out of it.

  "You have to come. We'll swing by and pick you up," she said with finality. "It'll be a big group of us." Just then, Carson walked by pushing the mop bucket. "You're coming, aren't you, Carson?"

  "Sunday?" he called as he passed by. "Yep, I'll be there."

  She turned back with far too shrewd of a look in her eye. "We'll pick you up right at noon."

  "Okay," I said doubtfully. I would've liked more encouragement from Carson about going, but it looked like Pearl wasn't going to let me refuse.

  When it was time to go, I stopped in the office, where Carson was closing up his desk and getting ready to leave. "Good night," I said at the door. "I'm off the next two days."

  "Hey," Carson said, his eyes lighting up. "Come in, please."

  I stepped in and closed the door behind me, noticing everyone else was gone. Carson walked around the desk to greet me and the next thing I knew, he was kissing me passionately. I gripped his hips and pulled us as close together as I could.

  He broke the kiss and put his forehead on mine. "I missed you," he whispered. "I've been dealing with construction every waking moment that I wasn't here working."

  "I know. That's why I haven't bothered you." Pressing my lips against his, I considered taking him against the desk but decided the time apart was giving me a good opportunity to decide how I truly felt about dating him, not just being friends with benefits. "Good night," I whispered, pressing more kisses against his lips.

  "I'll see you Sunday," he replied.

  As I left, I smiled, content to spend two days by myself and reflect on my feelings toward Carson.

  I slept in Friday, then when I woke decided to call the animal shelter to see if they needed any help. She said always, so I headed there.

  The sweet dog I'd fallen in love with the first time was still there. "Nobody wants Hugo?" I asked Pam.

  "He's had a few families interested in him, but he just stares at them like he's depressed. It doesn't inspire them to want to adopt him. And some don't want to deal with the inevitable complications that will come with him only having three legs." She couldn't have known how deep that sentence cut me.

  Hugo's tail slammed against the wall of the cage as I spoke to the shelter worker. "He seems happy now."

  She leaned against the wall and studied him. "He sure does." With a shrug, she walked from the room. "Maybe it's you."

  I was sure she was only saying that to make me want to adopt him, but even so, I decided to ask Ian how he felt about pets. Maybe adopting Hugo wouldn't be the worst idea.

  Following the same procedure as last time, I slowly emptied the cages, happy to see the one dog that had been marked with a red color was gone. "What happened to that fella that wasn't cleared to be around other animals or children?"

  "Your friend's idea panned out. The senior center came and got him. I've checked up on him twice and he is as happy as he can be. And so are the seniors.”

  A huge grin split my face. “I'm so glad to hear that." I’d been scared she'd say he’d been put down.

  I finished cleaning out the cages with a huge grin on my face. It was nice when an idea panned out. It took me longer to finish the job since I did it alone and didn't want to sacrifice the dogs' outside playing time by letting them run around while I cleaned. I put them out, cleaned, then went out and played with them
, giving all of them equal time and attention. My attention kept going back to Hugo. Every time I came in or out of the room, he stood staring at me, wagging his tail. He never barked, just stood there on his three little legs, staring.

  Maybe he sensed how alike we were. When all the big dogs were back in their cages and I was ready to start the small dogs, I grabbed Hugo again, showing him a little extra attention. He spent most of his time trying to play with me instead of going after the balls and toys I'd brought outside.

  By the time I finished, I was starving, so I headed home to make lunch and finally dig in to empty all the boxes in my bedroom. Leaving poor Hugo was harder than I thought it would be. I resolved to ask Ian about having a pet the next time I saw him.

  That night, I texted Carson.

  Max: I know you're going to be busy, but do you think I could go by your house and get Droo tomorrow?

  Carson: Sure

  Carson: Why?

  Max: I love that your initial response is yes. THEN you ask why.

  Carson: I trust you, but I am curious.

  Max: I want to hike and it's more fun with a friend. I might throw the ball into the water for him for a while.

  Carson: That's perfect. Thank you! I haven't been able to pay him much attention this week.

  The next day, I found the key exactly where he said it would be, under a fake rock on his walkway. Looking around surreptitiously, I tried to make sure nobody was watching but laughed in the end. In this neighborhood, most of the neighbors probably already knew the key was there anyway.

  Droo waited on me at the door, wagging his tail as if he already knew where we were going. "Did your dad already tell you?" I asked him as I got his leash, ball, and towel from the counter in the kitchen where Carson said it would be. "You seem awfully excited considering you have no idea where we're going.