The Best Part of Me

by A'zayler

  “Why did you let him do that?”

  She sniffed. “It wasn’t on purpose. I was just so submissive that I lost myself in him. Anything that made him happy, I did it. No matter how simple it was. His favorite color is orange, so if I was in the store and a shirt I liked came in orange and black—”

  “You got orange?”

  “Right. So, after focusing on him, my life literally became his, and that was my fault because I should have never let that happen.”

  “He should have never let that happen.”

  “I know that now, but all I thought about then was being a good wife. For a while, everything was good. He was happy, I was happy. We were good. And I mean really good. He was my best friend and one of the best providers I could have ever asked for. Our marriage wasn’t all bad and only got bad when it got bad, if you know what I mean.”

  Jerrico nodded his understanding.

  “So, one day, things just started changing with us. He was complaining more, starting pointless arguments, and coming home later and later from work. I’m no fool, so when he got mad with me about being stupid and dumb simply because I didn’t want to switch our seats at a concert we were going to, I knew it was something. That type of attitude didn’t come from a regular disagreement.”

  “What’d you do?”

  Goody smiled and looked away. “Okay, don’t think I’m this crazy woman who snoops around for no reason. I’ve never been the insecure, check on my man for every little thing he does, type. But when I feel the need to check…”

  “You’ll check?”

  “Sure in the fuck will.” Goody nodded seriously. “So, I checked our phone bill, and there was a number from Louisiana all up and down our record. I mean, all day long they were talking. Right after or right before he talked to me, he’d talk to her. Of course, I was sick to my stomach and literally fell to the floor for a minute.” Goody’s chest began to rise and fall faster as she talked.

  Upon noticing how disturbed she was becoming, Jerrico grabbed her hand and rubbed the back of it with the pad of his thumb. She gave a faint smile and kept talking.

  “When I finally built up the nerve to check the number, I typed it in my phone first, and nothing came up. So, I typed it on Facebook, and her profile came right up. I swear on my life, Jerrico, I thought I was going to pass out. I got lightheaded and everything.”

  “You knew her?”

  “Yep. She worked with him. My ex-husband is a basketball fanatic, so he does camps and stuff for the youth sometimes. Her kid was one of the boys he mentored.”

  “Damn, so you’ve been around her before?”

  “All the fucking time. Talking to her and everything. Like, literally, we’d text and shit, so when I realized it was her, I wanted to fucking die for two reasons. One because I couldn’t believe he’d betray me like that, and two because they’d made me look like a damn fool. He and her both knew they were fucking around but had me parading around in her face like shit was sweet. I was so damn disgusted and embarrassed. All I thought about was killing them.”

  Jerrico sat back in the chair and blew air through his teeth. That was some fucked up shit. Cheating was one thing, but embarrassing your significant other was another. That part was foul like hell.

  “You don’t cheat that close to home. That was dumb on his part.”

  “Nah, what was dumb was thinking I wouldn’t find out. Even dumber to throw your whole life away on a retarded bitch, you don’t know from a hoe off the street.”

  “So, he left you for her?”

  Goody’s whole face frowned. “Fuck no. I left him. Not because I wanted to, though, so I won’t pretend. But because he left me no choice. He just wouldn’t stop. At one point, this fool told me he was in love with both of us and couldn’t choose. Now, Jerrico, you’re a man. Please make me understand how you can’t choose between the woman you’ve been with since high school, grew up with, went through every trial and unfortunate situation with, been broke with, got money with, struggled with, and literally made you the man you are, and the bitch you met a few months prior and don’t know shit about other than she’s cute and y’all have common interest? Where that make sense at?”

  Goody paused and looked at him. Jerrico had assumed her question was hypothetical, but by the way she was looking at him, he knew she wanted him to respond.

  “I can’t speak for that man. All I know is that was stupid. There is no comparison. You don’t throw your life away over no hoe.”

  “Exactly, which is why I was going to stay even after the fool did all of that, but like I said, he just wouldn’t stop.”

  Jerrico sat back up again and leaned closer to her. “What you mean?”

  “Exactly what I said. He wouldn’t stop.”

  “I told you, bae. I don’t be having no money,” Kayson told her while rubbing his forehead.

  Goody turned in her seat to face him. She’d just pulled up at his job to bring him lunch, and they’d been joking about being broke ever since.

  “How you be broke, but you pay for you and Andrew’s haircut every week?” Goody shot out.

  Kayson looked at her like a deer caught in headlights. After an hour-long conversation with his li’l hoe that morning, she’d found out way more than she’d cared to know, but since the hoe was feeling generous, she’d told all. Every fucking thing. Goody had been sick to her stomach listening to it, but the woman she was would die without knowing every detail.

  After the conversation with his little stupid ass girlfriend, Goody wasted no time pulling up on that fool. He’d been caught off guard like hell, and that was exactly how she liked it. Now he was sitting there stuck with no time to think of a lie.

  “Don’t look stupid now. Your pathetic bitch told me that her son goes to your barber now, and you pay for his haircut every time you go. Now tell me how in the fuck you broke but doing big money shit like paying forty dollars a week for two haircuts when you ain’t got but one head?”

  “It’s not like that.” Kayson started lying while looking out of the window just as his hoe’s car was driving up the hill.

  Goody wanted to knock his fucking head off when she saw the shocked look on his face. “Yeah, that’s her. I told her to bring her sad ass up here too. That way, no lies will be told, so I hope y’all got y’all stories straight.”

  Kayson watched dumb ass park and hop out of her car. Goody hit the locks to her car so that she could get in the back. The car felt like a damn courtroom once she got in and settled in the backseat. With nothing to tell, Goody sat back and allowed the couple to have their moment. They were the ones with all the secrets.

  “So, Kayson, you really told her I approached you?”

  “You did,” he yelled.

  “You’re a liar. You came to me. You said that you weren’t happy and that you and her and hadn’t had sex in months. She told me that you all just had sex last night.”

  “We did,” Goody spat. “As we’ve been doing. We’re young and married. We fuck every day, sometimes twice a day, so you were dumb to believe that anyway.”

  “Every time he hit me up, he always acted like he was starving for sex. Begging to eat my pussy and everything. We literally just had sex in his car yesterday on our lunch break.”

  Anger shot through Goody, and she punched Kayson so hard in the side of the head that it hit the window. She kept swinging, prepared to do more damage, but he blocked her punches.

  “I should kill your muthafucking ass!” Goody turned toward the girl in the backseat of her car. “You too, hoe.”

  Goody wanted to spit on that bitch just for being a bitch. Her stupid ass raised her hands in surrender and sat back as far as she could on the seat. Since she wanted to hear the rest, Goody sat back and directed her anger at the right person, Kayson’s bitch ass.

  “What the fuck, Kayson? What the fuck you on, dealing with this hoe?”

  “I made a mistake. She was there, and it was easy.” Kayson turned in his seat and reached for Goody�
��s hand, but she snatched it away. “It wasn’t even good. Just something to do.”

  “Oh, it wasn’t good? You sure did want it a lot for it to not have been good.”

  “I was cheating,” he dragged. “That’s what I was supposed to do.”

  “So, all the gifts? What was that about?”

  “What gifts? Because you been hollering broke for the last few months with me. I know like hell you ain’t have me giving you my last so you could trick off with yours?”

  Looking just as stressed as his dumb ass should have, Kayson sighed and rubbed his temples.

  “He got my windows tinted for Christmas, had flowers and gifts all over my house when I got home for Valentine’s Day, and he bought me new shoes and a jacket the other day for no reason.”

  Goody’s hand went like lightning, tagging his ass. She was doing her best to fuck him up in that front seat. She was so mad that she could hardly see straight. When she got tired of him blocking her hits, she stopped and cranked up.

  “Y’all get the fuck out of my car before I kill both of y’all retarded asses.”

  “Kayson, who do you want? Huh? Is it me or her?” the pathetic witch yelled from the back seat.

  Goody was still breathing heavily as she turned to face her husband. She wanted to know too. She’d literally sat there and watched him argue with the girlfriend he wasn’t supposed to have, lie, and a bunch of other shit that was beneath her and hadn’t thought to ask that.

  “My wife! Paradise, I want you, baby. I’m sorry about this. She didn’t mean nothing to me.”

  “Really, Kayson? I can’t believe you!” li’l stupid yelled from the back seat. “Give me back my key then.”

  Goody’s head snapped around. “You have a key to her house?”

  Kayson dropped his head and nodded. Goody’s heart left her body. The way she felt at that moment was indescribable. She literally felt every emotion there was to feel. She was hurt, angry, sad, confused, shocked, and a host of other things she couldn’t even put into words. Killing them was the only thing going through her mind right then.

  “He has a key because he was always there. When you went out of town to visit your sister in California, I think he said it was, he spent that whole weekend with me. He decorated my house for Valentine’s Day, and he’d just crash there on the days he took off work but told you he was still going.”

  That little bitch was obviously mad that she’d lost because she was blowing that nigga’s spot all the way up. Goody was truly at a loss for words. All she’d gotten was that bullshit bubble bath on Valentine’s Day, and this nigga was around there being romantic for a bitch he barely knew. It was funny how he did shit for his hoe that he didn’t even do for Goody, and she’d been the one holding him down for the past couple of years of their life.

  “Get y’all asses out of my car before y’all die, and I’m not fucking around.” Goody reached for her purse where she kept her gun.

  Kayson, already knowing what was up, hopped out of the car. His gutter rat followed suit and got out. When Goody realized she’d taken it out the day before when going to the government center to get her documents notarized, she screamed. She wanted to kill them so badly! It felt like hell then, but looking back, she realized that God had spared her life. She would have killed them and gone to jail for life when they weren’t even worth it.

  “Damn, Paradise. I’m so sorry you had to go through that, baby.” Jerrico got up and pulled her barstool from the counter.

  Once he’d stood her to her feet, he squeezed her in a tight hug. Goody cried… hard. She’d been holding in so much anger, resentment, and pain, just trying to move on with her life, but not realizing how much of a hold it still had on her. Through every scream, flashback, and tear that Goody endured, Jerrico was there to hold her.

  That was some heavy shit she’d just laid on him, and he didn’t understand how she’d handled it so well. Whether she knew it or not, she was strong. A weaker woman would have never been able to handle that type of pain.

  “Now, you see why I’m a savage?” she laughed while wiping her face.

  Jerrico helped her wipe her tears away. “Hell yeah!”

  “I don’t mean to be this way, nor do I want to be, but it’s safer. I’ll never, ever let another man hurt me like that again. I don’t even know if I’ll ever love anybody like that, which is what scares me with you.” Goody rubbed the side of his face. “I don’t want to hurt you, Jerrico, but I don’t know if I’m what you need right now. I’m too raw.”

  “Would you cheat on me?”

  “Never. After experiencing what I did, I would never purposely put someone else through that type of turmoil. It’s cruel.”

  “Then, you’re exactly what I need.”

  Goody shook her head and pulled away some. Jerrico stopped her. “I don’t know, Jerrico.”

  “I’ve been through stuff too, but it was due to my own half-stepping. Never anything like your past, but I promised myself that I’d never sleep on my feelings again.”

  “Your feelings?”

  “Yes. I have them for you. Nothing that will scare you away, but enough to know I want to get to know you more. Have more of you.” Jerrico looked into her wet, pained eyes and rubbed his hand up the back of her head.

  He massaged her hair, messing up her li’l ponytail in the process. She didn’t seem to mind, and neither did he. The fear in her eyes made him feel powerful and optimistic. Jerrico might not have been the best man, but he knew how to love a woman, and that was for sure. His father had loved his mother fiercely until he died, and Sofia had finished raising them to the best of her ability afterward.

  Jerrico and his brothers were a lot of things, but when it came down to love, they were the best at it. With Sofia being the only girl in their lives for such a long time, they’d had much practice. She always told them that any man who loved his mother right would love his woman the same, and that was the truth. The way he’d loved Summer was real and had proved that. As bad as he felt when he let her get away scared him enough to never let it happen again.

  “Can we just take it slow and see what happens?”

  “Under one condition.”

  Her red eyes were hopeful as she looked at him and waited.

  “You can’t tell me we’re taking it slow but entertain other men. If we’re friends and working to see where it’s going, I need some exclusivity. I’m not saying you have to treat me like your man, but not ready for a relationship means just that. Don’t have me thinking we’re doing one thing, and you’re really doing another. If you want to date other men, then you can, I’m not holding you. Just let me know, so I can do the same.”

  “Okay.” Her voice broke. “I understand.”

  Jerrico waited for her to say more.

  “So, what’s it going to be?”

  She looked confused. “What you mean?”

  “Are we friends working toward more, or dating other people too?”

  “I said, okay. I thought you knew that meant I agreed with you. I won’t talk to any other men, only you.” She pointed at him. “Same goes for you.”

  “I wouldn’t ask you for anything I’m not prepared to give back.”

  Goody smiled, and Jerrico kissed her. Their lip lock heightened when he grabbed the back her legs and picked her up so that he could hold her. The long legs he was head over heels for circled his waist and hugged him snugly. His chest sank at the feeling she gave him.

  “Yeah, you gon’ have to give me some exclusivity. I can’t think about you acting like this with no other nigga. That’s gon’ drive me nuts.”

  Goody smiled against his mouth before resuming their kissing. When she had enough, she pulled away and held her head down like she was embarrassed.

  “What you hiding for?”

  “I’m ashamed. I just told you all my business, even started crying.” Goody rolled her eyes. “I’m too G for that shit.”

  “It’s okay to cry. That stuff was painful.”
>
  “Don’t think I was crying because I still want him either, because I don’t.”

  Jerrico smiled. “I’m starting to think you’re just emotional. You cried twice last night.”

  Goody dropped her head onto his shoulder to hide her face. Jerrico could do nothing but laugh as he recollected their night together. She’d cried in the car and again during sex once they’d gotten to his bed. As much as it could have ruined their moment, for some reason, it only urged him to go harder. Maybe because he knew her tears were the kind you shed when something was finally right. It made him feel good to be the one to do that for her.

  “That’s because you felt so good, bae.” Goody’s eyes dropped as her body took on a different mood.

  She relaxed more and even began to move subtly against him. Jerrico’s mouth went to her neck, sucking on it lightly. Well, he thought it was light. The bright red mark that showed up proved otherwise.

  “You feel so good, it makes me cry.” Goody grabbed his face and stared into his eyes. “Don’t stop.”

  “I won’t.” Jerrico could feel himself rising and needed to prevent that, so he put her down.

  As soon as she felt the hardness, she tried to climb back on him. He laughed and pushed her away.

  “Stop, girl,” he said while doing his best to push her away.

  “Why? I want you.” She grabbed his mouth and bit his bottom lip. “Give it to me,” she demanded in a tone sexy enough to make him drop to his knees and worship her.

  “Shit, take it.” Jerrico licked his bottom lip and held his hands up, letting her know she was free to do whatever she wanted.

  Goody quickly pushed the band of his pants down and wrapped both of her hands around it. His eyes closed as he allowed her to stroke it. He was doing everything he could to hold his composure and not make any noises, but it was hard. He was a man who liked to express himself, so if she made him feel good, he was going to show it. Sometimes, that got out of control.