by L. Ann Marie
She starts shaking again. “He hasn’t bothered me in a couple of years. I thought he was done. Maybe this isn’t such a good idea. He isn’t going to stop until I’m dead. You should go now.” What? It dawns on me she has no idea he’s been escorted out of the yard at least a dozen times since she’s last seen him.
“Not fuckin’ leaving.”
“It’s just going to get worse, Digs. I don’t want to see you get hurt. I shouldn’t have gone anywhere. I know better. I shouldn’t have done this.” Tears are running down her face. Fuck. I don’t know what to do, so I pull her onto my lap.
“You are not going back to hiding every fuckin’ day! You have a right to live like everyone else, Penny, and I’m not leaving because some pussy is bullying a girl. Get it right the fuck out of your head.” Danny really will kill me if I leave this house tonight and I have no clue why, but I don’t want to leave. I should be running the hell away from all the baggage she’s carrying. She’s got a fuckin’ pussy scaring the shit out of her, but I don’t want to run. I want to hit him again. I must be going crazy. I’ve never just hit someone and now I want to beat the pussy all over again. This is the crazy Geek was talking about. I’m IT, not a Security thug or an HS crazy ass Brother; what the hell am I thinking?
Thank fuck the Prospect is here. Getting her to drink is easier than I thought. She surprises me, slamming the first back and sipping the second. I pull her back on me and drink my beer. What the fuck am I doing? She lays her head on my chest and falls right to sleep. I’m relieved when she does. I need a fuckin’ minute to figure out how my body keeps doing shit when my brain isn’t looking.
I hear Danny yell then open the door with a key. When did he get a key? He walks in and smiles. Fuckin’ LaPontes always smiling. “Good, she calmed down. I thought I’d check before I called Kate over.” He sits in the chair like he’s going to be here a while.
“She’s good. Let me put her on her bed.” I stand quick. I need some fuckin’ answers and probably some advice before he leaves.
I find her room and lay her down gently. Taking her shoes, I put them by the chair and pull the blanket to cover her. When I turn back I stop. She’s got pink lace panties on that are not covered by her skirt. I could lay down with her...fuck. Danny is sitting in the living room. I cover her and think of how many ways Danny could kill me. That takes care of my hard-on pretty quick, so I get back to the couch and my beer.
“How bad is this going to get?” I ask him, thinking my life just took a turn and I’m no longer in control.
He’s watching me with that eye. I wonder for the millionth time how the fuck he sees so much. “Pussy is a lawyer, always has a story and knows we can’t touch him for the shit he pulls. He’s always been careful to never step over the line. For years he’s pushed but never stepped over that line.”
“Until tonight,” I say and my stomach drops. Fuck.
He nods. “It’s been fuckin’ years, Digs. He always stayed where we couldn’t touch him, scaring the shit out of her. Once the new tagging program started, he hasn’t been able to do that. Tonight he crossed the line. PD has him and the video. He can’t fight the video.”
I think about that. “Do I need to press charges?”
He gives me a smile that sends chills down my back. “No, we’ll handle this away from PD. Pussy has his house and office wired. Jessie will get us in. I need you to pull everything you can on him, then we’ll play with his feeds.” They will drive him crazy. I’ve seen them do it before until people move out of town or stop fuckin’ with someone. They will dog him until he leaves for good. I like it and nod. I can do that. I just wish I had my laptop here. “Prospect is bringing clothes and computers.”
My head whips up to see his face. “How the fuck do you know what I’m thinking?”
He laughs. “Your fingers move. If I didn’t know you, I’d think you play piano. When you have a job on your mind your fingers move like they’re typing.”
I relax my hands. “Computers? I just need my laptop. I don’t want them fuckin’ my computers up.”
“Sticks is with them. They’ll have everything here in a little while. Penny has a back room that’s empty. You can set up in there. I’ll have the electrician here tomorrow to wire for you.”
“What the fuck? I’m only here for the night. I don’t want all that shit moved twice. The house is ready in a couple of days, right?”
That chill hits my spine again. He’s smiling with that intense look in his eye. “Tess says you’re staying, that’s how we got there so fast. Tess. Since you’re staying, there’s no reason not to get your shit over here now. You need your computers and I need a house for Chet.”
I stand up and pace. “I can’t just move in. She’ll feel like she’s in prison again! I don’t want me linked with that feeling for her. I’ll stay at the Club, but I’m not putting her through that shit.”
“Okay. I’ll call little Ben and get someone else in here with her.” He stands.
“What? Not fuckin’ happening!” He’ll have to kill me.
He swings around. “You stay or someone else will. It’s that fuckin’ simple. She sees a therapist when she needs to, she’ll deal. Video shows you moving on her word never looking back until she was safe and you wouldn’t have been sitting there holding her if you weren’t all in. You could have sent her to bed, but you didn’t. So this is you having to admit it to yourself and figuring out what the next step is. You want to go to the Club, go knowing a Brother is in here with her.”
Fuck. “I’m not leaving another Brother in here and you fuckin’ know it. This will be me walking into her life and telling her what is next. She needs time to figure that shit out for herself. You’re married to Kate. You should know that better than anyone.”
He laughs. “Kate said she’s dragged it out long enough.” He stops and watches me for a second. “She’s got scars, Digs, on the inside and out. You get past that quickly. Tess will talk to her tomorrow. You’re off the schedule for the day. Spend it with your girl.” He walks out. Sonofabitch!
I don’t get a fuckin’ choice here? I drop down and do fifty push-ups. No fuckin’ choices, no fuckin’ control of my body pulling her to me, no fuckin’ control of my life. That stops now. I go look at the back room. Danny’s right, it’s empty except for two boxes. It’s perfect for my computer room, but where the fuck am I supposed to sleep? There are no other bedrooms. Fuckin’ Danny.
The Prospects get here with Racks and I have them move everything in through the back door. My clothes go in the closet and my dresser is against a wall. It’s not great, but it works.
I’m hooking up the computers when we hear a blood-curdling scream. I slam my head on the table, but I get out from under it and into her room before she stops. She’s in the middle of the bed, holding her throat. Her blouse is lifted, showing marks on her rib cage. I should have killed the son of a bitch. “Penny, it’s all right. I’m right here.” I walk closer, talking gently.
I hear the Prospect behind me. “Fuck, what happened to her?”
“Get out! Close the door on your way.” I don’t look at him but hear the door close. “I’m right here, Penny.” She’s moving as if someone is holding her down. When I put my knee on the bed she screams again, scaring the shit out of me. “It’s me, Penny, no one is going to hurt you.” I touch her arm and she starts fighting me. She’s scratching the shit out of me. I don’t want to hold her down, so I lift her up and hold her against my chest. “No one will hurt you, Penny. It’s just me here.” I talk until she calms down, saying the same thing over and over. I feel like an idiot, but it’s working.
She hiccups, then her body relaxes against me. “Digs?”
“Yeah, pretty Penny, I’m right here.” I kiss her head. My fuckin’ body needs to stop this shit.
She looks up at me. “It was just a nightmare. I haven’t had one in a while. I’m sorry I bothered you. I’m good now.”
Looking down at her, I know Danny’s right. I’m
all in. She’s a fuckin’ mess of tears, makeup, and red splotches, and all I can think is I want to kill the bastard that put her through this. “You don’t look good.” Fuck! “I mean, you don’t look ready to be done...I don’t know what the fuck I mean, but I’m not letting you go yet.”
She smiles and nods. “Okay.”
When she lays her head back on my chest I breathe easier. I could have fucked this up, but she let it go. She’s been easy with everything tonight. I shouldn’t be surprised. When she’s asleep I lay her back down and finish setting up the computers. The Prospects have everything in place, so it doesn’t take much to get me up and running. Racks comes in, letting me know the Prospects have the food put away and they’re taking off. “Thanks, Brother.” He leaves, telling me he’ll lock up.
I work until I can’t see straight, then climb on the bed and pass out.
Chapter Three
Penny
Oh darn! My body is lying against someone and I know before I open my eyes it’s Digs. He smells like citrus and the woods. I take a deep breath, liking the mix. His arm tightens around me when I do. Oh dear. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do, so I just stay still. “I can’t say this is a bad way to wake up, but if you don’t fix your clothes soon you won’t be wearing them in another minute.”
I jump and sit up. Dear Lord! I’m a mess. I pull my shirt down, wondering if he saw, then fix my skirt so it’s not folded up and is actually covering me. “I’m sorry. I’m not used to sleeping with anyone.” I look over at him then away. At least he’s smiling.
“Look at me, Penny.” My eyes find his and he’s still smiling. “It’s a damn shame you chose fixing your clothes over losing them, but we’ve got time and I can be patient, to a point. We need to talk and you may not like what I’m going to say.”
I don’t understand but wait until he sits up. “I need to see,” he says, taking my braid and pulling the elastic off. He unwinds it and runs his fingers from my scalp to the ends, draping it in front. My body feels like fire is running through it. When it’s all undone he moans and my body is ready to explode. “I can’t wait to feel this on my chest while I’m buried balls deep in you.” My whole body shivers. Holy Moses, that is hot! I’m trying to breathe normal, but it isn’t working and he notices. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you, pretty Penny?”
“Yes,” I croak out, then cover my mouth with my hand. I can’t believe I just said that out loud. He moves my hand and leans in to kiss me. Oh my Lord! My arms go around him and I hold one hand in his hair. He’s got my hair in his hand and pulls so my face is turned up to him. I moan in his mouth and he pulls away, making me whimper. I don’t want to stop. I don’t understand.
“Turning your head like that is fuckin adorable. We need to stop before I can’t. I’ll make coffee while you get changed.” He kisses my head, then lets my hair loose and gets off the bed, looking down at me. I just watch him. He bends and kisses my head again, then walks out of the room, shaking his head.
I sit for a minute, trying to figure out if I wanted him to keep going or not. Fiddlesticks! I wanted him to keep going. Tess was right, it’s moving fast. I get a shiver down my back, but it’s not the Digs kind. This gets me jumping out of bed and running to the bathroom. “Eeek.” I’m a mess. I put my hair back up and take a quick shower, then throw a skirt and blouse on. Back in the bathroom, I take my hair down and brush it out. I need a trim and make a note to call sometime today.
When I’m done I follow the voices to the kitchen. “Hi, Danny,” I say, pushing through the door but stop when I see Geek sitting at the table too.
“It’s all right, Penny. We’re leaving. I just needed to let Digs know what’s going on,” Danny says, standing up.
I nod but walk toward Digs when Geek stands. He puts his arm out and I move under it. “He’s out, Penny. He called in a favor and got bailed out this morning. Digs will keep you safe,” Danny says, watching me.
“Thank you.” I can’t really think. He’s out already. I’ve got nowhere to go. The MC keeps me safe as long as I stay in town. I’ll have to make a point to stay in town.
“Take a couple, get this shit straight,” Geek says to Digs. I look away.
“Stay in the yard, Penny. If you need to go out, we’ll make arrangements for you,” Danny says.
I look at him and see he’s smiling. “Okay.” I put my hands together so he doesn’t see me shaking.
He throws chin and they leave. I sag against Digs. “They wouldn’t hurt you, Penny. Right now they’re doing everything they can to keep you safe.”
I stand straight and turn to get some coffee. “I know. Danny always watches over me. Someday he won’t be there.” I pull a mug down and pour. “I hope that’s not today,” I whisper and wipe the tear off my face.
His hand moves my hair behind my ear. “I don’t like this. I don’t like when you use your hair to hide behind. I told you last night, Penny, and I’ll keep telling you until you get it, no more fuckin hiding. You have a right to live like everyone else.” He sounds mad.
I look up from the coffee and see he is. “Okay.” I look back and add cream and sugar.
“You’re not getting it. Sit and I can tell you what’s happening.” He moves a chair out for me and I sit. His phone rings and he swears. “I need a minute, don’t move,” he says, walking out the door.
When the phone rings I answer it, wondering if he meant don’t get up. I sit back down just in case and talk to Tess. She makes me laugh, sounding surprised that I answered. “I’m so glad I caught you!”
“Hi, Tess, the shop isn’t open today.”
“I know. I needed to tell you to relax and let Digs do his thing. He’s not going to hurt you and you end up happy!” She makes me laugh, sounding excited. I still get the shiver down my back, but it’s not scary.
“Okay. I think he’s already doing his thing. Danny and Geek just left.”
“Oh good! Just relax and let things happen naturally, that means at warped speed.”
I laugh again. “Oh my gosh, they already are. I don’t know what’s happening to me, but it’s moving really fast. My ex tried to run us over yesterday and Digs kept me safe then beat him up. I don’t remember much else, though.”
She’s silent for a few seconds. “Penny, you let Digs worry about him and you concentrate on being with Digs. It will all work out in the end.”
This time the shiver is scary. “Okay.”
“Let’s go out Friday. I’ll call the girls and we can meet at Nancy’s for shopping then go out.” She’s back to excited.
“That’s sounds like fun. Let me know what time.”
She giggles and it sounds musical. “Bye, Penny, I’ll call you with the time.” She doesn’t wait for me to say bye, so I just shut the phone off and put it in front of me.
Digs is watching from the doorway. “Tess?” I nod, a little embarrassed, but I don’t know why. He sits down on the side of me, smiling, “I had Rich.” I laugh. They are tag teaming us. I know Tess did that with Amanda because I was there. “Apparently this is supposed to happen, but I get the feeling I’m not getting the whole story. How about you?” He’s too smart to miss that.
“No, I think there’s more she’s not saying.”
He refills our coffee, moving the cream and sugar so I don’t have to get up. That’s sweet. I know I’m smiling while I fix my cup, but I don’t care because he moved it for me. No man has ever done anything for me except Jake, but he doesn’t count. Holy Moses, where did that come from? I think about that. He’s like a friend not a boyfriend. I think of Digs as a boyfriend? “What is going on in your head? You went from the sweetest smile to the adorable tilt to perplexed.”
He looks like he just rolled out of bed with his hair all messed up and his face stubble, his shirt is unbuttoned and his belt isn’t buckled. My body notices too, but I keep still and smile. “I’m not sure how to think of you.” I shut my mouth so I don’t say anything stupid. I went on one date. Jiminy!
&nb
sp; He sits back down. “I get that. I’m in the same boat. I’ve got everyone telling me how it’s going to be but no one telling me how to get there. Well, except for Patches’ list.” He runs his hand through his hair and it falls on his shoulders perfect.
I want to do that. I focus on what he said. “Patches gave you a list?”
He looks over my shoulder. “Yeah, I don’t date, Penny. He gave me a list so I don’t fuck it up. Now I’m living here and it’s all fucked up.”
What? “You’re living here?” When did that happen? Tess is crazy. This isn’t warped speed, this is Twilight Zone.
“Yeah, that’s what we need to talk about. If I’m not here, Danny’s putting another Brother here. That’s not a fuckin option as far as I’m concerned. I know you feel something for me. I’m already in.” He’s already in? “You take what you need when you need it. It’s not a race and I’m not playing fuckin games. I never lived with a woman, so you need to cut me some slack and tell me when I’m fuckin it up. Patches’ list only goes so far. You tell me when you need something because I can’t read your mind and I’ve never done this. Yeah?”
He’s already in. Does that mean he wants to stay, like forever? Take what I need and tell him when I need something. How does he expect me to do that? I can just tell him when I want something?
“Look, Penny, this won’t work if you don’t talk to me. I just put myself out there and you’re not saying anything. If I’m wrong, just say so, and I’ll get the Prospects to move my shit up to the Club.” He’s mad. I’m nervous and shaking. Just tell him. He stands up. “Right.” He’s leaving. How do I keep him here?
Just tell him. He’s mad and he’s big. “Please.”
He spins around and I duck. “Jesus, Penny, I’m not going to hurt you.” His hands are on me. He pulls me up and I’m not sure what to do. “Fuck, you’re scared to death thinking I’m going to hurt you?” I shake my head no, looking down. He sits with me on his lap. “Babe, you have to tell me what’s happening here. I don’t know what to do.” He moves my hair and I put my head on his shoulder. This right here feels right.
