Miriam's Secret

by Jerry S. Eicher

  “Don’t worry about it.” His hand reached out to brush her arm. “I just want to spend time with you, Miriam. You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to. Just serve me pie and ice cream and cheesecake and I’ll go home happy.”

  “All of that?”

  His grip was firm as he held her arm this time. “I’m teasing. You don’t have to serve anything. I’m just thankful to have learned to know you the little that I have. And I’ll be thankful for a few more hours spent with you. Don’t take your troubles—whatever they are, too seriously. We all have our imperfections and flaws, you know.”

  “You have flaws?” She steadied herself with both hands.

  He laughed. “Yah, but I’m not telling you them. At least not on the first date, so don’t think you have to spill your secrets either. I’m hoping we’ll have many more chances to get to know each other in a deeper way.”

  “Oh, Wayne!” Miriam let go of the doorframe. “Thank you for understanding. But I still think I should tell you what’s on my mind before we get much deeper into this relationship.”

  His smile was warm. “I’m touched how serious you’re taking this. It’s a gut sign to me. I hope the Lord blesses you for it—as I know He will.”

  Miriam nodded. “The Lord wants us to be honest. That’s what Daett taught me.”

  “And he’s done that well, I’m sure.” Wayne slipped past her as Uncle William appeared from around some potted plants. “I’d better get to work.”

  “I know,” Miriam whispered after him. “Me too.”

  “No dating on my time now!” Uncle William teased. “There’s work to be done.”

  “Just a few looks and whispers here and there, I promise,” Wayne shot back. They both laughed.

  Uncle William gave instructions to Wayne as a buggy pulled into the driveway, right after an Englisha car parked in front of the greenhouse.

  From a distance, it looked like Ezra Mullet, the school-board chairman, but Miriam wasn’t sure. The Lord knew she needed a distraction right now and timed this so perfectly. After a long, serious talk about school matters surely her mind would be in a much better state. She’d be ready to concentrate on work.

  Although Wayne said they didn’t have to spill secrets until they got to know each other more, she really wanted to tell him. She counted on him to understand and help her. Well, at least he’d understand why she felt she had to tell him. The thought of what Wayne would do beyond that sent a shiver up her spine. If he rejected her for keeping such a secret from everyone, that would have repercussions far and wide. Ezra Mullet might even reconsider her qualification as the community’s schoolteacher.

  With steady steps Miriam approached the buggy. Ezra peered out with a pleased look on his face. His voice boomed in the morning air. “Just the girl I want to see! And I didn’t even have to go looking for you.”

  Miriam paused near the buggy. “Uncle William told me you might be by this morning.”

  Ezra glanced toward the greenhouse. “I hope I’m not interrupting your work. I tried to get here right after chore time, but the morning is getting on, I know.”

  “It’s okay,” Miriam assured him. “We’re not busy yet.” Wayne appeared briefly in the greenhouse doorway. He waved and disappeared again.

  “Nice young man there,” Ezra said. “Not that it’s any of my business, but that’s one of the questions we must ask our prospective teachers. Are you dating at this time?”

  Miriam felt her neck getting warm. “Wayne has asked if he can bring me home Sunday evening after the next hymn singing.”

  Ezra appeared quite pleased. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Wayne’s an up-building member of the community. I see you’re fitting right in. That’s what we like to see in our teachers. Oklahoma isn’t for everyone, and we don’t want you to hightail it back to Possum Valley in the middle of the term.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t do that,” Miriam said firmly. But what would she do if it didn’t work out with Wayne? Would she still be willing to stay in the Clarita community? Her head pounded. She couldn’t approach Ezra later next week and tell him that she did, indeed, plan to return to Possum Valley after all—and in total disgrace. She had to clear this matter up with Wayne as soon as possible.

  “Is something wrong?” Ezra scrutinized her face.

  “I was just thinking through the responsibilities,” Miriam shared. “You really don’t know that much about me. Perhaps I’m not the best person for the position?”

  A slight smile crept across Ezra’s face. “So that’s what’s wrong? Thinking about us, are you? Well…we know enough, I would say. But we appreciate your concern. It speaks well for your character, as has everything else I’ve heard. I confess that Deacon Phillip wrote to your bishop back in Holmes County…a Bishop Wagler. He had only gut things to say. I’m sure there are no complaints the bishop doesn’t know about.”

  He meant that as a question, Miriam was sure. She met Ezra’s gaze. “I’ve behaved myself. I mean, how many ordnung rules can a girl break? I’m done with rumspringa, and I joined the church a year ago already.”

  Ezra nodded. “I’m glad to hear that. We don’t practice rumspringa here. It’s refreshing to see a young person from somewhere else make up her mind at such a young age.” Ezra paused. “How old are you?”

  “Twenty.” Miriam glanced at him. “I thought that would be the first question you’d ask.”

  Ezra grinned. “Never ask a woman’s age—at least not at first. I wasn’t too far off. I guessed twenty-one.”

  “Thank you,” Miriam said with a smile. She decided she’d take his guess as a compliment.

  Ezra continued. “As you probably know, our school isn’t a large one. You will teach all eight grades, and there are a few pupils in every class this term. Will that be a problem?” He studied her carefully.

  Miriam hesitated. “I haven’t taught before, so I’m not sure.” But her answer seemed to satisfy him.

  “It’ll be a learning experience, I’m sure. You’ll be pleased to know that our teacher from last year, Sarah Mullet, my niece, has agreed to help you. She married last fall and is expecting her first child. That’s why she’s not teaching this year.”

  “I’m sure I’ll have plenty of questions, although I can’t think of any right now. I hope she’ll meet with me before school starts.”

  Ezra laughed. “First-term jitters, yah. Well, that’s gut too. Overconfidence isn’t the best approach, I say. In life or anywhere else.”

  “I agree,” Miriam said at once. “And thank you for this chance. I can’t say how grateful and honored I am.”

  “You are more than welcome.” Ezra jiggled the buggy lines. “I guess I’d best be going then so you can get to work. I’m sure you’ll be an outstanding teacher for us.” He clucked to his horse and said, “See you later” as the horse turned to head back down the driveway.

  Miriam waited a few moments and watched until Ezra was gone from the driveway. The parking lot had begun to fill up with cars while she spoke with him. Uncle William and Wayne probably had their hands full, but they’d survived so far, she thought. A few more minutes wouldn’t hurt. She needed to slow down the thoughts buzzing through her head. A quick trip to the mailbox would be just the thing. There might even be a letter from Mamm. That would bring a much-needed sense of familiarity with all the new things happening around her.

  Miriam put her thought into action. She walked to the mailbox and found a pile of mail inside. She flipped through the items on the walk back to the house. There was a letter postmarked Berlin, Ohio, but the handwriting was unfamiliar. Shirley met Miriam at the front door, and she handed her the letter since it was addressed to both of them.

  Shirley wasted no time ripping the envelope open. She scanned the page, and her face lit up. “It’s another girl, Miriam! Mamm and Daett named her Anna, after our great-aunt on Mamm’s side. Naomi’s the one who’s written to us about it.”

  “Isn’t it a little early for the ba
by?” Miriam took a deep breath. “I didn’t think it would be this soon.”

  Shirley read on. “Naomi doesn’t say anything about that. Just that all went well. Oh, this is so exciting. We have a new sister!”

  So the letter contained gut news. Miriam heaved a sigh of relief. Now, it was time to get to work.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  On Sunday evening after the hymn singing, Miriam waited beside Wayne’s buggy as he disappeared into the Byler barn with his horse. Soft moonlight flooded the countryside. Miriam took in a deep breath of the summer air. Tonight had been a wonderful evening so far, and she was confident it would continue. She’d baked a cherry pie yesterday, and Uncle William had helped her make homemade vanilla ice cream last night. They’d eaten some for supper, and Aunt Fannie had declared the effort perfect. The rest was in the freezer for tonight. Everything was ready.

  Now, if her heart would cease its heavy pounding she might be able to relax. There was no reason to be anxious, Miriam told herself. Wayne had been his usual kind and gentle self on the way home from Deacon Phillip’s place, where the hymn singing had been held.

  She took another deep breath. Silence hung heavy in the air, and she took in ghostly shapes formed by the plants outside the greenhouse. Aunt Fannie and Uncle William would be asleep now, along with baby Jonathon—or so she hoped. Even if they weren’t, no one would hang around since this was her first date with Wayne. The living room would be theirs for the evening.

  That thought brought a tinge of sadness. Shirley wouldn’t be around either. She’d hurriedly headed home to Possum Valley right after the news of baby Anna’s birth. In fact, Miriam guessed that about now Mamm and Daett would be on their way to the bus station with a hired driver to pick her up. Shirley was scheduled to arrive a little before midnight, Ohio time.

  The whole thing had been so sudden—the arrival of the letter with the news of baby Anna’s birth and Shirley’s sudden announcement that she would return home immediately. She used the excuse that she needed to help Mamm now that the baby had arrived. Miriam knew this wasn’t the real reason. Shirley had given up on finding happiness in Oklahoma. In a way, Miriam felt like she’d failed her sister.

  But Shirley’s problems paled right now in comparison to her own, Miriam decided. She feared how this evening would end despite her prayers and her trust in Wayne. Her faith was weak, but surely the Lord understood. He would carry her onward.

  She might never have another moment like this, Miriam reminded herself as Wayne came toward her in the moonlight. She had a wunderbah boyfriend in hand—someone who loved her. She would risk all to tell him the truth. It must be done.

  Wayne’s face broke into a broad smile as he walked up to her. His hand moved forward for a moment, as if he meant to reach for hers.

  Miriam trembled. She didn’t dare reach for him, although Wayne’s hand in hers would be heaven on earth.

  “Nice evening,” Wayne said as he gestured toward the house. “Are you ready to go inside?”

  “Maybe we can stay out here a few more minutes.” Miriam clutched the buggy wheel. “It’s so lovely in the moonlight.”

  Wayne grinned. “Anywhere with you is fine with me, Miriam. And I must agree it’s lovely. These prairie nights with a full moon have their own special glory.”

  Miriam laughed nervously. “It’s my first summer here, so I want to enjoy it to the fullest.”

  “Hopefully there will be many more.” Wayne gave her a quick glance before he turned his gaze at the full moon.

  The light that flooded his face showed a hint of stubble. Once Wayne had a frau, his beard would grow full and long. Miriam turned the thought away at once. This was not for her to think about. Not until she’d made her confession. And wouldn’t out here in the moonlight be a better place to tell him than on the couch in the living room? She couldn’t see Wayne’s face as easily out here, but then neither could he see hers.

  “Wayne?” Miriam gathered herself together. “Do you remember I said I had something important I wanted to tell you?”

  He seemed to think for a moment. “Yah, I remember, but you don’t have to.” His voice was quiet. “Whatever it is, Miriam, I’m fine with it.”

  She searched his face. “What if I’ve committed a grave sin? Wouldn’t you want to know that?”

  His voice was confident as he said, “You haven’t. I know it.”

  Her heart beat faster. What confidence this man had in her. It took her breath away.

  “I’m sure you haven’t done anything extraordinarily wrong, Miriam. No one is perfect, but I’m sure you come close.” He reached over and squeezed her hand.

  She held on for a moment before she let go. “There’s more to the story of my inheritance from Mr. Bland, Wayne. I want to share something with you that I haven’t told anyone else—not even my family.”

  He waited calmly and patiently.

  When Wayne didn’t say anything, Miriam continued. “Mr. Bland left me the farm, which is now set up in a trust to benefit my family. None of us can sell it without the consent of the others. But Mr. Bland didn’t just leave me his farm. He left me enough money to operate it—and much more. He bequeathed two million dollars to me. The money is in a bank account under my name.”

  He stared at her, and then looked back at the moon.

  Minutes that seemed like hours ticked by.

  “Please say something, Wayne,” she whispered.

  He shrugged. “What am I supposed to say? Do you think that changes anything in my mind? That I might be impressed with that amount of money instead of you? None of that’s possible…unless it’s that my feelings for you increase because of your integrity.”

  “Higher?” Miriam choked on the word. “How about lower?”

  Wayne didn’t hesitate. “No way, Miriam. There is no negative side of this. You didn’t ask the man to leave you his farm and money.”

  “I could have refused it. I could have at least given the money away…” Her voice trailed off.

  Wayne shrugged. “You were right in not doing any of those things. If the Lord allowed you to have that kind of money, then He must have a plan for your life that will require those assets.”

  Miriam gasped. “Like what, Wayne? Daett says money is a terrible corruptor. What could I possibly need such an amount for? What kind of trials would the Lord send that would require two million dollars to fix?”

  Wayne’s smile was gentle. “Don’t look on the dark side of things, Miriam. I didn’t mean it that way. Money can be used for gut. The Lord might desire for you to do much gut with that money. We don’t know what He has planned. Obviously you didn’t go out and spend it like many people would. Isn’t that wisdom to your credit?”

  Miriam took a deep breath. This was more than she’d hoped for. It seemed too good to be true. Wayne saw that the Lord’s hand must be in her situation! And Wayne seemed unimpressed with the amount of money involved. Had he not heard correctly?

  Miriam repeated the information. “It’s two million dollars, Wayne. A two followed by six zeroes.”

  His laugh was soft. “I heard you, Miriam. And I suppose you’re worried that I might want my hand in the cookie jar, so to speak. I’m not concerned, Miriam, and I don’t desire your money. This information doesn’t change anything between us, Miriam. I don’t want or need the money. Things are different out here. Can’t you feel and see it? Not that any one of us is perfect, but we think differently. I know for myself that I would have felt the same way about you even if I’d known you had two million dollars stashed away. When I first laid eyes on you, I told myself, ‘Now here is a woman of character I want to know better.’ And I’ve not changed my mind. I feel blessed to be interested in a woman like you, Miriam. I do care about you a lot, and I’m grateful that you seem interested in knowing me better too.”

  “Oh, Wayne!” Miriam was so relieved that she could hardly talk.

  Wayne’s hand found hers and squeezed it gently.

  She clutched bo
th his hands. She wanted to lean on his shoulder, but that wouldn’t be seemly. She felt the Lord had orchestrated this moment.

  “I’m glad you told me,” Wayne said, interrupting her thoughts. “That must have been a great weight on your shoulders to carry alone.”

  “Yah, it was.” Her voice was a whisper. How perceptive of him to see her heart and need so plainly. “I thought at times you’d leave once you knew I had so much. Even though my heart told me it wouldn’t matter to you, my fear kept reminding me that it might.”

  “Why, Miriam?” His hand tightened on hers. “I’d never think less of you, Miriam. Not for something like that. I mean, what’s money?”

  “Maybe it does signify too much to me,” Miriam confessed. “For as long as I can remember Daett told us about the evils of money—how it corrupts and the power it holds over people. I guess I was afraid more than anything else. An experience back home has left me a bit…confused about how to handle all of this.”

  She decided that was all she needed to tell Wayne about Ivan at this point. One confession was enough for tonight. Maybe sometime in the future, but right now Ivan’s fake attention felt cheesy and out of place. She wouldn’t even honor him with a mention. And what she used to feel for Ivan—or imagined she felt for him—seemed small and insignificant compared to her feelings for Wayne. The moonlight and the relief from sharing her secret was probably accentuating her feelings, but they were real enough in their own right.

  Miriam knew now she could trust Wayne with her heart. He would know what needed to be done—if and when they said the wedding vows together. Her heart beat faster at the thought, but her fingers slipped from his grasp when a new one took its place. “Do you think I need to share this news with someone else right away?” She glanced up at him.

  Wayne didn’t hesitate. “I don’t think that would be the Lord’s will. He’s given you the money to handle. And I’d say you’ve shown yourself worthy of the task. So there’s no reason to create a problem or give fodder for rumors. Not that there is anything to be ashamed of, but your daett was correct on one point. Money can do strange things to people.”