Remember Me (Men of Honor Series Book 1)

by Lara Van Hulzen

“Tess. Honey, can you hear me?” Emma put a hand on Tess’s arm.

  When Tess opened her eyes, Ben thought his heart would leap out of his chest.

  “Ben,” she whispered.

  “I’m here.”

  ***

  Tess blinked a few times. Was he really here? He’d come back for her. Closing her eyes again and opening them, her vision cleared. His eyes were intense, a fire burning behind the pools of deep brown. His hand covered hers.

  “I’m sorry.” She slipped her hand away from his. “I should have called you Jake.”

  He took her hand again and held it tight. “It’s Ben. I want you to call me Ben.”

  She tried to sit up in bed but a jolt of pain shot through her middle. She lay back down. “I’m confused,” she whispered. “I thought your name was Jake. Why aren’t you in San Diego?”

  “Don’t try and talk, okay? I came back when Mike called me about your…accident.”

  Her eyes moved to Mike, who smiled and said, “Hey, T. Glad to have you back.”

  “Just rest, Tess,” Emma said.

  “Yeah. Thank God you only bruised a few ribs, but you’re pretty banged up. You need to try and not push it, okay?”

  She nodded and closed her eyes. Ben’s left hand held hers tight and his right rested on her forehead, his fingers brushing hair from her brow. “Just rest. I’ll be here when you wake up. I promise.”

  ***

  Tess sat propped up in bed, soaking in the sight of him. Ben lounged in a chair, his head back and his fingers laced together across his stomach. He wore jeans and a T-shirt, with flip-flops. She loved the combination of his style—both surfer and construction worker, depending on his mood. One day he’d be in surf shorts and a T-shirt, the next day jeans, work boots, and a faded button-down. He wore dress pants and a shirt and tie as a detective, but he hated it. Loved the job, just not the wardrobe. She knew many women didn’t like men with beards, but she loved his. The dark hair along his jawline made his smile stand out and she had to admit, she liked the way it tickled her neck when he nuzzled in for a kiss.

  Feeling her face flush, she looked away. She had no business thinking about his kisses. He wasn’t hers anymore, and although he kissed her at the train station, she knew it was nothing more than being caught up in an emotional moment. For crying out loud, this Ben barely knew her. So what he was doing back here anyway?

  “Hey.”

  His husky voice brought her attention back to him. His eyes were the color of chocolate. Divine. He leaned toward her, his expression eager.

  “You look great.”

  She couldn’t suppress a laugh. “Liar.”

  “I’m not lying. It’s good to see you so awake and sitting up. How do you feel?”

  “Not great, but okay.” She took a deep breath. “It still hurts to breathe, but not as much as yesterday.”

  She looked at the bandages on her fingers and arms, the memory of what happened flooding her senses. Her fingers stung at the thought of grasping for anything to help her stop rolling down the hill. The large arms wrapped around her right before she was thrown flashed before her and she shivered.

  “What’s wrong, Tess?” He moved from his chair to her bed, sitting next to her legs and taking her hand.

  “I was just thinking about what happened.”

  “Do you remember what happened?”

  She chuckled at the irony. He smiled.

  “Yes. I remember everything. I was running on the trail and I heard someone behind me. At first I thought it was another runner, so I moved over to let him pass. When he didn’t, I panicked and reached for my pepper spray, but before I could grab it, his arms were around me and he threw me down the hill.”

  His grip on her hand tightened. “Were you able to get a good look at him?”

  “No. It happened so fast and I only saw his arms. He was big though, with dark hair all over his forearms.” That was helpful. She’d just described about half the men in the world. Ben had taught her some self-defense moves and how to be aware of people around her in case she ever had to defend herself. But the man had grabbed her so fast, she’d had no way of fighting back.

  “I should have been more alert to someone behind me before he got so close.”’

  “This isn’t your fault, Tess.”

  He touched the bandage on her forehead and then ran his thumb down her cheek.

  “You scared me to death.”

  She trembled at his touch. Placing her hand over his, she leaned into him, accepting the safety his presence always provided. Her mind told her not to get close again, not rely on him. But her heart told her otherwise.

  The door creaked and Ben stood up, moving back to the chair by her bedside.

  “Hey, T.”

  Mike came in with Emma behind him holding a huge bouquet of roses. Gwen was by her side.

  “Hey, guys.” Tess’s heart warmed at the sight of her friends. She smiled at Gwen. “Hey, boss. What are you doing here?”

  Gwen placed her hands on her hips. “What am I doing here? I was about to ask you the same question, young lady. I just about fell out of my chair when they brought you in. I was terrified. Don’t you ever do that to me again, you hear?” She gave Tess a tender hug.

  “I’ll try not to.”

  Gwen looked at Ben. “Well, aren’t you looking good these days, lumberjack.”

  Ben looked between Gwen and Tess, his confusion obvious as the two women shared a giggle over their inside joke.

  “Or should I say, Irish lumberjack.” Gwen winked at Tess.

  Ben’s cheeks turned red and Tess laughed harder.

  “Ouch! Oh, that hurts. No more jokes or laughing.”

  “Sorry, honey.” Gwen patted Tess’s leg.

  “Okay, what’d we miss?” Emma asked. She set the flowers on the table by Tess’s bed and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

  “Nothing,” Ben said. Tess could’ve sworn he turned a darker shade of red.

  “Our lumberjack here gave us a peep show when he was brought in last week, and I’m guessing he wishes he’d had those four-leaf clover boxers on at the time.”

  Ben looked like he wanted to crawl under the bed and die.

  Mike and Emma laughed.

  Mike slapped him on the back. “No worries, dude. They’re nurses. They’ve seen it all.”

  Ben didn’t look like that made him feel any better.

  As much as she enjoyed the moment, Tess felt sorry for him and changed the subject. “So when can I get out of here and back to work with you?” she asked Gwen.

  “Honey, you can go this afternoon, but you’re not coming back to work anytime soon. At least not for a few days.” Tess started to protest, but Gwen put a hand up to cut her off. “Now, don’t go saying a word. You know better than anyone that you can’t be working in your condition. You need lots of rest and someone to help you. I’m guessing between these three here, you’ll do just fine.” She looked at Mike and Emma and then winked at Ben.

  Tess found it odd that Gwen included him.

  “I’ll be back with your release papers as soon as I can,” she said over her shoulder as she left the room.

  The door clicked and three sets of eyes were all on her.

  “She’s right, T. We’ve been talking, and we’ve come up with a plan.”

  Tess frowned. What did Mike mean by “we”?

  “I’m going to stay with you so someone is there with you at night,” Emma offered.

  “And Mike and I are going to take turns being with you during the day,” Ben continued.

  “What?” She was still trying to deal with the news that she’d be living like an invalid. The thought of having Ben with her every day made her head spin. She didn’t know if her heart could take it.

  “We’ve already talked about it, and it’s the perfect plan. You need someone with you, and this way you’re completely covered.” Emma patted Tess’s arm as she talked. “I talked to your parents. I told them you fell while running and will
be fine. I didn’t want to worry them. Besides, between the three of us, we’ve got you covered.”

  She looked at Ben. “You agreed to this too?”

  He took her hand again and nodded.

  “Why?”

  “Because you need the help. You were there for me when I had no one. I want to be there for you.” She sensed he wanted to say more, but held back with Mike and Emma in the room.

  “But…”

  “No buts, Tess.” Mike cut her off. “Ben’s gonna stay with me, and like Emma said, she’ll be with you at night. When she goes to work during the day, Ben will stay with you. I can check on you, too, when my schedule allows.”

  Overwhelmed, she looked at the three of them and willed herself not to cry.

  “Thank you,” she squeaked out.

  “Let me help you get dressed,” Emma said.

  And with that she shooed the guys out of the room.

  ***

  Ben leaned against the railing in the hallway. Mike had gone to talk to Gwen about Tess’s home care, although between Mike being a doctor and Tess’s nursing skills, they’d be fine. Still, he appreciated the moment alone. His fists clenched as he thought of anyone harming Tess..

  She acted so surprised about them all caring for her, like she’d be fine on her own. But she only thought of her recovery. His thoughts were consumed with protecting her from more threats. It didn’t sound to him like some random stranger looking to hurt a woman. And the sleaze could go after her again. He’d never succeed. Ben wouldn’t allow it. He shoved his fists into his pockets.

  Oh, yeah. If this guy was looking for a fight, he’d definitely found one.

  Chapter 9

  Tess watched from the deck as two young children ran towards the waves and then back again, squealing with delight. They both had saggy bottoms, sand dragging down their swimsuits. She recalled her own childhood. She and her sisters would sit in the sand for hours, splashing in the water and digging in the sand with buckets and shovels, never once thinking about the wad that collected in their drawers.

  “It’s funny the things that just don’t bother you when you’re a kid,” Ben said. He set an iced coffee on the small table and sank down into the chair next to her.

  It was uncanny how he read her thoughts.

  “Thank you for the coffee. You spoil me.” She took a long sip. Her body ached. She initially hated the idea of being waited on by everyone, but as soon as she got home, saw how much she needed help.

  Getting used to Ben waiting on her was tough, but he gave her space. He didn’t hover. The routine they fell into was so normal, so easy. And yet, a part of her knew it couldn’t last. He was here to help her as a friend returning a favor, nothing more. She was grateful, but her heart wanted more.

  “You’re welcome.”

  For a moment she thought he’d read her mind again, but he was referring to her gratitude for the coffee.

  He looked at the kids by the water. “There’s just nothing cuter than those little bathing suits with the ruffles. And the added sand in the pants is hilarious.”

  “I know, right?” Tess laughed. “I was just thinking of how my sisters and I could do that all day when we were little and the sand never bothered us.”

  “It would bother me.” He made a funny face.

  She laughed hard, causing a shooting pain through her ribs. She winced and hugged her middle.

  “I’m sorry. I keep forgetting that laughing is not a good idea for you right now.”

  “It’s okay. It’s worth the pain.” The pain subsided and she relaxed.

  “How many sisters do you have?” He leaned back in his chair with his face towards the sun. He closed his eyes. The white swim trunks were a stark contrast to his legs and shirtless chest, now a deep bronze from sitting outside with her each day.

  “I have two sisters. I’m in the middle.”

  “Ah, the peacemaker. Gotta stay neutral when you’re in the middle of anything, right?”

  “Hmmm, I’m not so sure about that.”

  “I don’t know. You seem pretty mellow to me.” Peeking at her through one eye, he smiled.

  “Is that so?”

  He closed his eyes again, the look on his face giving away his enjoyment at teasing her. “I know that I’m always calm when I’m around you. I think that means something.”

  Funny, she felt the same way about him.

  She took another sip of coffee and faced the waves. Three large seagulls flew by, their bellies almost skimming the water. Their cries harmonized with the tune of the children’s laughter.

  “So, what happened in San Diego?” She’d avoided the subject since he got back, and he hadn’t offered any information. The pull to tell him the truth was now a constant tug-of-war in her gut. The truth about Jake Wilson played a major role in her decision.

  He kept his eyes closed but took a deep breath. Maybe he would never answer her. A small part of her hoped he wouldn’t. Jake Wilson would just fade away, and she could move forward with Ben. Send the past out with the tide and focus on the future. The Bible said the truth could set you free. Could it set Ben free? And would his freedom mean no future for them?

  Finally, he said, “I went to the address on my ID. It was…interesting. But, not much to tell about it, really.” He scratched his beard. A telltale sign he was hiding something from her.

  Reaching out, she ran her fingers along the tattoo that wrapped around his left bicep. A band of ocean waves floated around his arm. The bamboo-looking pieces were actually the letter “T” intertwined throughout. He looked at her hand. “You like tattoos?”

  “I like this one.” She brought her hand back to her lap and laid her head back, letting the sun soak into her skin. She’d dared him to get a tattoo about a year ago, seriously thinking he never would. But when he picked her up one morning to take her on a special date, he took her to a tattoo parlor and told her to choose one for him. Then she’d surprised him by getting one on her hip. Smiling at the memory, she let the ocean breeze and sounds of the waves lull her to sleep.

  ***

  Ben looked over at Tess, watching her chest rise and fall with steady breaths. When she’d fallen asleep exactly, he wasn’t sure, but he was glad. She needed the rest. Emma had told him Tess wasn’t sleeping well. Restless from the pain, she moved around a lot at night, trying to get comfortable.

  She looked plenty comfortable now. The pink dress she wore made her sun-kissed cheeks glow. Her golden hair hung loose around her shoulders, a thin headband holding it away from her face. When she’d touched the tattoo on his arm, a current ran through him, straight to his heart. He’d been spending the past few days helping her move around, but she’d actually reached out to him.

  He hoped he’d hid any tension he felt when she asked about what he found in San Diego. With her still weak and recovering, he wanted to spare her the details of the horrible house he’d found. He didn’t plan on telling her about the gun that still sat in the bottom of his duffel bag. At least not until he knew more about it himself.

  His gut knew something wasn’t right. The crummy house. The gun. An attack on Tess. It was all wrong. He didn’t know the whole story, but he knew one thing. He wasn’t about to let anything happen to her.

  ***

  “Hey, sleepyhead.”

  Ben turned his head. He was on his back on a beach towel in the sand. Tess was lying on her side, next to him, her head propped up on her hand. He looked into her twinkling green eyes and soaked in the sight of her. The sun shone behind her, making a golden halo of her hair. It fell across her shoulders like a waterfall. Sand dusted her face and hands.

  “Ben. Wake up.” Her voice was so tender, but her mouth didn’t move with the words she spoke. She just smiled at him. The light behind her head got brighter and brighter until it swallowed her whole and he had to cover his eyes with his hand.

  “Ben, I’m afraid if you stay out here any longer, you’ll burn.”

  He blinked a few times and then
moved his hand. Tess was there, but they were on her deck, not the beach. She stood in front of his chair, nudging his arm. He rubbed his eyes and sat forward.

  “We both fell asleep, and I’m afraid we’ve been out here a while. I don’t want you to burn. Besides, I’m getting hungry. I’m willing to treat you to dinner, but I need you to drive us there.” She patted her middle, referring to her injuries. Her smile faded. “Hey, are you okay?”

  He rubbed his beard and ran his hands through his hair. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just waking up.” He looked up at her and then at her chair. “I’m sorry I fell asleep. You aren’t supposed to move around too much on your own, ya know.”

  “I know, but that nap felt great, and I was fine to at least stand up by myself. So, are you up for some dinner?”

  “That sounds great. Let me just go change.”

  He took her coffee glass into the kitchen and went to Mike’s to shower. He hopped in to wash the sand and sunscreen off. Even though the hot water pounded his shoulders, he couldn’t rid his body of the shivers. What he saw with Tess on the beach wasn’t a dream. It was real. It was a memory. He was sure of it. He just wasn’t sure how it was possible.

  ***

  Tess and Ben sat at a high counter facing the water. Andy’s was one of her favorite places to eat. A local dive that could hardly be called a restaurant, it was situated on the docks where fishermen went in and out in search of their daily catch. With cod and halibut practically jumping from the boats into the frying pan, Andy’s had the best fish tacos on the planet.

  They looked out at the marina while enjoying tacos and drinks. Ben was quiet. His brow furrowed as he downed half a taco in one bite. A seagull flew over and landed on the flagpole of a large fishing boat.

  “Wanna talk about it?” she asked.

  He chewed and stared out at the water. “Talk about what?” He took another bite of taco and continued to avoid her eyes.

  “Nice try. I know something’s bugging you.”

  “And how exactly do you know that?” he said, facing her.