Fiona McArthur

by The Surgeon's Special Gift

He went on without completing that train of thought. 'So this is why you're doing a temporary job. Because you'll be off work for the next couple of months, recovering?'

  'That's right. It's the least I can do for the unit.'

  He nodded but not at anything she'd said. It was as if he'd just confirmed something to himself.

  'And the last week you couldn't tell me?'

  'I've tried for the last three days.'

  'Earlier would have been better. Yesterday was the first effort I've seen, but it's out now.'

  He laughed without humour. 'Define irony. A kidney surgeon falls for a live donor and she's reluctant to risk a relationship because she's donating a kidney.'

  'You and your daughter don't need another tragedy in your lives.'

  His face twisted into a cynical smile. 'Sophie is definitely a concern. This bears more discussion, Ailee. Let's say I'll pick you up at five. And by the way, I want a psychological and psychiatric assessment done on William a.s.a.p.'

  Ailee's head was still spinning from the impending discussion at five. She frowned. This could slow everything down again. 'He's already had one, a few months ago.'

  'And he can have another. I have concerns he may not be mentally ready for this.'

  Ailee couldn't believe what she was hearing. 'You can't postpone our operations!'

  'I'll pretend you didn't say that, Doctor,' Fergus said very quietly, and then walked out of the room.

  Ailee sagged back against the wall.

  So much for everything being fine. Fergus had found out in the worst possible way and now he was angry with her. She just hoped he wouldn't take it out on William. She shook her head. Of course he wouldn't.

  Fergus walked out of the ward, around the side of the hospital and down to the shady area reserved for smokers. Thankfully, the area was deserted, and he could have a few moments to himself.

  Lord knew, he needed time to come to grips with this.

  Live donor. People did it all the time. He advocated it. He had travelled halfway across the world in a flimsy plane to discover new ways to promote live donations in Australia. Now he had one on his own doorstep that he didn't want.

  'Ironic' wasn't a big enough word. Would it have been better if he'd known this yesterday before he'd taken Ailee home to his bed? Would he have distanced himself from her because of this?

  He doubted it. It was a shock and he could even begin to see her side of the dilemma, but he'd been hooked on Ailee since Singapore and it didn't change the way he felt about her.

  But this sure as hell complicated things. Concern about Ailee's operation was the last thing his daughter needed now she'd started to trust him again.

  Ailee walked out of the office and straight into Rita.

  Rita took one look at her and glanced around to see if anyone else had noticed Ailee's pallor. 'You OK, kiddo?'

  'I'm fine.'

  'So he wasn't thrilled to find you were the donor.'

  'I think he's just disappointed I didn't tell him beforehand, seeing as I work here and everyone else knew.'

  'Is that what it was?' Rita didn't sound convinced but she didn't labour the point. 'What time is your appointment with the Ellises?'

  Ailee looked at her watch. 'Another half-hour, but I need to check one last recipient.' Ailee chewed her lip. 'We need to arrange another psychological and psychiatric assessment of William on Mr McVicker's orders.'

  'I'll do that.' Rita didn't seem to have a problem or think it unusual that Fergus had requested a repeat assessment. Maybe she was being paranoid.

  She heard herself say 'Mr McVicker' when she thought of him as Fergus and that sounded strange, too. It wasn't the only thing weird about her relationship with Fergus but one of many. She didn't have time or the headspace to worry about it. She'd find out where she stood soon enough. Five o'clock, to be exact.

  'If you hear any more about Jody, let me know, will you?' Ailee glanced at her watch again. It was time she headed back to her office. Her problems were nothing compared to those of the couple she was about to see.

  The Ellises looked worn down by grief and Ailee hugged them both. 'Thank you so much for coming.'

  Marion sighed as she sat in one of the two chairs in front of Ailee's desk. 'I know you said you'd come to us, Ailee, but we needed to get out. This visit gave us some purpose today.'

  Mr Ellis nodded as he sat beside his wife. 'We're finding it hard to start the day at the moment. Everyone tells us that in time we'll remember more good times, but we're not there yet.'

  Ailee felt helpless in the face of their grief. There was so little she could do to ease their pain. 'Nobody expects you to be able to function normally.'

  She shuffled the papers in her hand. 'Would you like to know about the recipients? I do have three letters here from the families of recipients whose lives have been changed. Please, don't read them until you feel you are able to.'

  Marion looked at her husband and then back at Ailee and nodded. 'Tell us a little if you can, please, Ailee.'

  'I can tell you that Eva has saved the life of a fifteen- year-old-girl with cystic fibrosis. This young woman would have died within the next week or two if not for Eva. Her parents are beside themselves with joy that she will now get better.'

  Marion smiled with great effort. 'That is wonderful news. Isn't it, John?'

  John nodded, unable to speak, and reached into his pocket for his handkerchief.

  Marion sniffed and lifted her chin a little higher. 'Is there more you can tell us?'

  'One of Eva's kidneys and her pancreas went to a twenty-two-year-old woman in Melbourne who is studying to be a doctor and had been sick for two years. She was also a diabetic, like the girl I told you about last week, so had the double transplant. She is doing so well she may go home at the end of next week.'

  They were all silent for a moment as they tried to envisage what it meant to the recipient.

  Ailee went on because she decided it would be better to get it all over as soon as possible. 'The other kidney went to a twenty-five-year-old man whose wife had died. He has two little boys, so the difference to that family is incredible.'

  Marion looked at her husband. 'Imagine if we hadn't agreed and all that good was wasted.'

  'It is always a hard decision,' Ailee said.

  'Can you tell us more?' John had recovered his composure and was trying hard to support his wife.

  'There is one more. The other person is a thirty-year- old woman, struck down with keratoconus, which is an eye disease where the central cornea bulges forward and prevents light from being focussed correctly into the eye.'

  Ailee sketched a quick diagram of an eye to explain the problem. 'The only substitute for replacing a human cornea is a human cornea.' She looked up to see that they understood.

  'This lady has been blind for eighteen months, lost her job and struggled to look after herself, and now, thanks to Eva, has had her sight restored and can lead a normal life.'

  Ailee handed across an envelope. 'All the information I can give you is on that sheet but I think it would be too much to take in now. Just know that you did the right thing and Eva has irrevocably touched these people's lives and she will never be forgotten.'

  'And we can't contact them, can we?'

  Ailee shook her head. 'No. I'm sorry. But I can send on any letters they or you want to send and there is an independent register you can leave your name with.

  Later, if any of the recipients want to contact you, they can register with them as well.'

  John nodded and looked at Marion. 'We'll think about it. A few months down the track perhaps.'

  Ailee smiled gently. 'Don't rush anything. You can ring me any time. If I'm not available, someone else will get back to you as soon as we can. I understand Eva's funeral is tomorrow?'

  John cleared his throat. 'We wanted to tell people about the families Eva's request has helped. Maybe then even more people will agree to sign donor cards in the future.'

  Marion added. 'Th
at way Eva's legacy will continue to grow.' Marion leant forward to lever herself up from her chair and her husband jumped up to help her.

  Ailee stood as well. 'That is a wonderful idea. I will be thinking of you both tomorrow.'

  'Thank you for your help, Ailee.'

  Ailee hugged them both. 'Thank you from me, Mr McVicker, all the staff here and especially the people whose lives Eva has changed.'

  Ailee watched them go and sighed. She remembered when her father had died suddenly and her family had gone through the shocking grief that surrounded the loss of a loved one.

  The gathering of family, friends and even strangers had helped more than she'd believed possible. She hoped it would be that way for the Ellises tomorrow.

  Her phone rang and it was a transplant co-ordinator from a southern Sydney hospital with a kidney available for one of her patients on the waiting list. Another tragedy like the Ellises'. Ailee couldn't help wincing, but it was another ray of hope for those in need.

  Ailee looked up her records and dialled the number of the proposed recipient.

  Thirty-eight-year-old Stephen Ward had been on dialysis for three years while he'd waited for a kidney and he couldn't believe it when Ailee phoned him with the news.

  'So I have to come in now?' Stephen's voice betrayed his disbelief and growing excitement.

  'Yes, please, Stephen. As soon as you can without getting a speeding ticket. You're only about half an hour away. Don't eat or drink anything and we'll start workup as soon as you get here.'

  'I'm on my way. Wait till I tell my wife.'

  Ailee smiled at the waves of exhilaration coming through the phone. 'Just remember, sometimes things change. Don't get over-excited until we can guarantee you're going in.'

  'I'll try not to—but it's hard. See you soon.'

  Ailee put the phone down and looked up Fergus's page number, then decided she'd ring Rita to prepare the ward first. Coward.

  Rita was quick to answer and too soon there was Fergus to be notified, and then the theatre when the surgeon had a time he was available. Fergus would ring the anaesthetists.

  When her phone rang she knew it was Fergus answering his page, and she couldn't speak for a second as she gathered her thoughts.

  'Did you page me, Ailee?'

  Ailee licked dry lips. 'Yes. We have a donor kidney and match available for today. What time would you like Theatre organised for?'

  'Make it two this afternoon. That should give the recipient time to fast and have the work-up. I'll have my secretary reschedule the afternoon appointments in my rooms for later.'

  Ailee bit her lip and wondered if she, too, would get a reprieve.

  Fergus must have read her mind. His voice dropped. 'Don't even think about it. It means our appointment will be rescheduled. I'll pick you up from your place at eight. If I'm late, I'll still be coming.'

  Ailee swallowed. 'We could put that off until tomorrow.'

  'No,' he said succinctly. 'Anything else?'

  Ailee pulled a face at the phone but her voice remained composed. 'That's all, thank you.'

  'I'll see you later, then.'

  His receiver clicked and Ailee put her own phone down. Today was going to be another big day.

  Ailee gathered the enormous amounts of paperwork needed for Stephen Ward's transplant operation and headed for the ward.

  She couldn't help going over the conversation she'd just had with Fergus as she walked, and she reasoned that if he'd considered her planned operation an insurmountable problem he wouldn't be in that much of a hurry to clear the air. Maybe everything wasn't as bad as she thought it was.

  * * *

  Fergus arrived at Ailee's house at exactly eight p.m. Ailee knew because she'd been watching the clock for the last hour and she'd only just checked the time again.

  'I'm going out now, Mum,' she called through to the sitting room where Helen was watching television.

  The doorbell rang before she could get to it and she muttered under her breath. She'd hoped to keep Fergus and her mother apart.

  Ailee opened the door before Fergus had finished ringing. 'I'm ready. Let's go.'

  'What's your rush?' He looked tall and gorgeous and totally in command and refused to move away from the door. 'I'd like to meet your mother.'

  Ailee glared at him, but she was really annoyed at herself for being so glad to see him there when she should be keeping him away from her mother.

  'Who's there, dear?' Helen's voice floated through to the front door.

  Fergus just stared back with slightly raised eyebrows. 'Don't you think there have been enough secrets, Ailee?' he said.

  Ailee sighed and turned to call over her shoulder. 'It's Fergus McVicker.' She resisted the urge to grit her teeth at Fergus. 'Would you like to meet him?'

  Helen appeared and Ailee moved back to allow Fergus to step into the tiled entry.

  Fergus smiled warmly and held out his hand. 'Hello, Mrs Green. I'm Fergus.! work with Ailee.' He shook hands and Ailee's mother blushed prettily.

  'Call me Helen. It's lovely to finally meet you, Fergus. You've featured in a lot of our conversations this week.'

  Fergus lifted his eyebrows and looked at Ailee. 'Really?'

  'William is a constant concern at the moment, as you know.' Ailee refused to bite. She glanced at her watch. 'I won't be long, Mum.'

  'Take your time, dear. I'm off to bed now anyway. Nice to meet you, Fergus.'

  'Good to meet you, too, Helen.'

  Ailee watched her mother colour again and she sympathised. Fergus being charming was hard not to like but Ailee was learning.

  Finally seated in the car, the silence was strained as they pulled out from the kerb. Ailee drew a breath to make her feelings known but he sidetracked her with his own schedule.

  Fergus glanced across. 'I have to call in at the hospital. I think Jody will be fine, but I want to check her one more time tonight.'

  The young recipient had been at the back of Ailee's mind all evening. 'Can I come up to the ward with you? Just to have a peek. I won't go in and see her.'

  He glanced across again. 'I don't have a problem with that—it's up to you.'

  When they arrived at the hospital Ailee followed Fergus up to Intensive Care, where he gowned and gloved before entering the isolation room. Jody was being treated with huge doses of steroids and the strongest immunosuppressants to prevent her body rejecting the donor kidney, but it left Jody's system easy prey to bacteria and viruses.

  Ailee spoke to the registered nurse at the desk and watched Fergus through the glass as he spoke to Jody and the nurse specialling her.

  'So she's improving?'

  'When he was here earlier, Mr McVicker seemed to think this acute rejection phase was settling. Her observations are stable and her counts are down.'

  Ailee could see that Fergus was preparing to leave. 'Fingers crossed. I'll pop up and see her parents tomorrow.'

  The nurse nodded. 'So what are you doing here? Are you with Mr McVicker for fun, or are there more transplants on the cards?' They both looked across at the other glassed-in room.

  Ailee forced a smile. Frivolity was far from the case. 'Not for fun, but no transplants tonight so far. How is our latest patient? Stephen OK?'

  'Looking good. His wife is a sweetie. They're a lovely couple to see such a good result for.'

  Ailee nodded, aware that Fergus was waiting for her. 'Better go. Thanks for your help.'

  Ailee crossed the room with relief. She hoped the nurse assumed they were there together on renal business because she wasn't ready to be the subject of a gossip storm. It had become a little tricky at the end.

  'Shall I take your arm?' Fergus teased, well aware Ailee was trying to give the impression everything was businesslike between them.

  'No. Thank you. I have to work here and you'll be going back to your own hospital in a week or two.'

  'That will be a good thing,' Fergus said quietly.

  Ailee looked across at him and wondered what
that statement meant.

  They didn't speak again until Fergus pulled up outside a trendy restaurant overlooking the moonlit beach.

  'I thought a late supper would be in order as I haven't eaten. You could have dessert if you're not hungry.'

  Ailee bit her lip. So he'd been working non-stop. 'That would be lovely. Of course you have to eat. Now I feel guilty I didn't offer you something when you came to pick me up.'

  'Guilt is good.' Fergus smiled and held the door of the restaurant open for her. So he wasn't angry with her any more. It was nice to banter and she could get used to waiters rushing to assist her.

  They were seated quickly at a reserved table and Ailee glanced around at the few couples still seated.

  'This is very stylish,' Ailee said. 'I was thinking you'd want somewhere more private to vent your feelings.'

  'I'm a very stylish guy,' he teased, 'and if I took you back to my home, I wasn't sure we'd get any talking done.'

  Ailee willed the heat not to rise in her face but her cheeks burned. 'It takes two.'

  'Absolutely,' Fergus said, straight-faced, and caught the waiter's eye to order.

  Ailee chose a sorbet and Fergus a rare steak and salad and the food arrived in minutes. They discussed Jody's stabilisation and Stephen's operation, and Ailee couldn't help remembering how good it was to have Fergus to bounce ideas off.

  As soon as he'd finished eating, Fergus returned to the issues they had been skirting all night.

  'So what are we going to do about this deadly attraction between us?'

  Ailee looked down at the remains of her sorbet. 'Is the attraction deadly?'

  Fergus waited until she was forced to look at him to break the silence and then he said, 'I admit to some homicidal thoughts when I discovered the tiny fact you hadn't mentioned.'

  Ailee lifted her chin. 'You said any secret I had wouldn't change the way you felt.'

  'And I meant it.' He allowed his words to settle between them and sink in.

  He changed tack. 'Why was it so hard for you to tell me about William?'

  Ailee stared ahead out the window to the moonlight sparkling off the waves. 'There are many reasons. Some major and some minor reasons, important to me and not to others.'