Straight from the Heart

by Linda Warren

  WHEN LUCAS DROVE UP to the gated entrance, Roger was waiting for them. Blair pushed the button to roll down her window.

  “Thank God you’re okay,” Roger said. “I was so worried.”

  “Why?” Blair asked.

  “Because I heard what happened with Easton.”

  Blair finally understood what Roger’s visit was all about. “I’m fine.”

  A car honked behind them. “I’ll tell the guard to let you in,” Blair said hurriedly.

  Roger ran back to his car with an expectant look on his face and Lucas felt a jab of jealousy. If Blair wanted to talk to Roger, that was her business, but he didn’t like it—not one bit.

  Blair knew she had to talk to Roger. He was becoming too protective, too worried about her, and it was her own fault. Roger was a nice person and she had leaned on him for her own selfish reasons. Now she had to tell him she couldn’t return his feelings. She didn’t feel for him the way he felt for her. Not the way she felt for….

  Lucas pulled into the parking space by her apartment.

  “I hope you understand that I have to see Roger,” she said.

  “Sure,” Lucas replied, and she could hear the disappointment in his voice. “I’ll pick you up in the morning so you can get your car.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “Fine, I won’t do it then,” he snapped, and she groaned inwardly. This wasn’t how she wanted the evening to end. She had so many visions of their being together, of enjoying new and delightful experiences. Now it was all ruined.

  Lucas couldn’t believe how testy he sounded. Jealousy was turning him into someone he didn’t much like. Roger was worried about Blair; he cared for her. Lucas was familiar with that feeling, but he hated the thought of her turning to another man for help, for support, for anything. The green-eyed monster was about to eat him alive and he knew he had to leave.

  Roger pulled up beside them. “I’d better go,” Lucas said quickly. “I’m feeling rather grubby.”

  She couldn’t let him leave like this. She reached out and touched his arm. “Thank you for a wonderful afternoon.”

  Her touch weakened his control. Her slim fingers felt like silk against his bare arm and suddenly all the negative feelings evaporated and all he wanted was to spend the rest of the evening holding her, kissing her and doing all the other sensual things he’d be dreaming about later.

  “You’re welcome.” He forced himself to smile, still annoyed that Roger was waiting for her.

  Without another word, she got out and joined Roger on the pavement. As Lucas drove away, he wondered how Blair would explain her scruffy appearance.

  BLAIR OPENED THE DOOR, flipped on lights and turned off the alarm system. She tried not to think about Lucas, but that was difficult. She just wanted to immerse herself in his touch, his smile, his kiss. She shook her head, forcing such thoughts away. She had to talk to Roger.

  She faced him in the living room and he was staring at her with a strange expression.

  “What happened to you?” he asked suspiciously, eyeing her appearance.

  She glanced down at herself. She held her shoes and purse, and carried her jacket draped over one arm. Her feet were bare and dirty, her slacks still rolled up to her knees. Her clothes were somewhat dry and her hair hung in rat-tails around her face. She looked a mess and she was trying to find a way to explain. Tell the truth—that’s what Lucas would do.

  “Lucas decided to cheer me up and got me completely wet in the process.”

  “Really?” His voice held derision. “A few days ago you didn’t want anything to do with him. Now you’re…what? Friends?”

  She sank onto the sofa, still clutching her purse, jacket and shoes. “It’s a long story,” she answered, not sure how to answer, but feeling it was none of Roger’s business. Still, he was her friend. “I’m sorry you were worried about me.”

  “No problem,” Roger said with a shrug. “I’m just glad Lucas was there for you.”

  “Yes, he’s been a big help.” She couldn’t keep the pleasure out of her voice. “With Blake and all,” she added, and didn’t know why she said that. Maybe it was the look on Roger’s face. As if he suspected something was going on between Lucas and her and he was hurt. God, how did she handle this? She had no idea. But she had to take some kind of action, and she had to do it now.

  She placed her things on the sofa, searching for the right words. “I need to talk to you.”

  “Sure, anything,” he said, and sat across from her.

  She took a moment to compose her thoughts. “I’ve taken advantage of your good nature,” she began.

  His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

  “I’ve leaned on you and used your help without realizing how that was affecting you.”

  “I’m still not following you.”

  She inhaled slowly. “You have feelings for me that I can’t return.”

  “Oh, that. Don’t worry about it.” He shifted nervously in his chair. “I’m aware of your past and I’m not expecting anything from you that you’re not willing to give.”

  “Roger,” she said uneasily. “You’re not listening to me.”

  “I can wait, Blair.”

  She bit her lip, hating to say the next words, but she had to. “I’m never going to have those feelings for you.”

  After a second, the words sank in, then he asked coolly, “Does this have anything to do with Lucas?”

  “No, it doesn’t,” she answered truthfully. She’d known she felt only friendship for Roger long before Lucas had opened her heart.

  Roger wasn’t convinced. “I like Lucas, but he has a reputation with the ladies. There’re so many broken hearts at the courthouse it’s like a battle zone.”

  Blair was well aware of Lucas’s reputation and she’d never heard any woman bad-mouth him. They all seemed crazy about him, even after he broke up with them. For the first time she wondered if she’d be one in a line of many. Her relationship with Lucas was very fragile, very new, and she refused to let Roger make her think like that.

  “This isn’t about Lucas,” she said forcefully.

  He rose to his feet. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”

  “I’m not,” she assured him, rising, too.

  “I’m still working on this Raye thing and I’ll also keep an eye on Easton.”

  “Roger,” she sighed. “You’re too nice for your own good.”

  “I just want you to be happy and safe.”

  She grimaced. “You’re making me feel bad.”

  “Don’t,” he said, and headed for the door. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Be sure to lock this door.”

  Blair stood there for a moment, feeling so many reactions she didn’t understand. Why did Roger have to be so considerate? Why had Lucas, of all men, touched her heart in a way no one ever had? Unable to find any answers, she quickly locked the door and set the alarm, then went to the sofa, picked up her things and walked into the bedroom.

  She shook out her jacket and looked in her purse. She couldn’t find her panty hose. Heavens, she’d left them in Lucas’s car. Oh, well… She shrugged it off. Lucas was probably used to women leaving things in his car, but she wasn’t keen on that idea—not at all.

  Was she crazy for putting her heart in the hands of a man like Lucas? She dropped onto the bed. Was that what she’d done? Yes, she answered her question, she had. And she didn’t even know if he wanted it.

  She ordered herself to stop thinking about Lucas. She had other problems to worry about—like Blake’s trial. She hurried toward the bathroom. A quick shower and then she’d call her brother and explain why she’d disappeared today.

  LUCAS DROVE into his garage, still wearing a somber expression. He couldn’t get Blair and Roger out of his mind. Was he still at her place? Would he spend the evening? “Okay,” he spoke aloud. “That’s enough.” This jealousy was getting to him and he intended to stop it right now. Roger would not be spending the night. There w
as no way that his jealous mind was going to convince him otherwise.

  With that firmly decided, he got out and noticed something on the floor. He reached down and scooped it up, smiling. Blair’s panty hose. He wondered if she’d missed them yet. He knew she didn’t need them because women had lots of these things.

  The smile lingered around his mouth, and he thought of attaching them to his radio antenna and letting them flap in the wind to tease her. The young Lucas would have done exactly that. But now he tucked them into his console, planning to give them to her in a quiet moment. He certainly hoped there’d be one of those in the near future.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  LUCAS SPENT the weekend at his office, reading through transcripts, familiarizing himself with the first trial. Frank would sort through them later, but Lucas wanted to know what had happened back then, and get some idea of what might happen now. He was absorbed in his work when the door opened and Roger walked in, breaking his concentration. Lucas wasn’t surprised to see him.

  “Hey, Roger,” he said, leaning back in his chair.

  “Stay away from her, Lucas,” he warned. “She doesn’t deserve to be hurt.”

  Lucas frowned. “What are you talking about?” he asked, but he knew. He’d have to be stupid not to.

  “Don’t play dumb,” Roger snapped. “Blair’s emotions are very fragile, so don’t toy with her.”

  “Whoa.” Lucas put up a hand, resenting Roger’s tone of voice. “Blair’s in charge of her own life.”

  “Are you serious?” Roger shouted. “After everything she’s been through—the beating, Raye’s harassment, Blake’s arrest and now Easton showing up—she needs someone to care for her.”

  “That someone being you,” Lucas murmured.

  Roger clenched his hands, and Lucas saw the bulging muscles in his arms. Clearly, Roger worked out. Lucas had never noticed that before. “Lucas, you knew how I felt about her, so why’d you go after her? I thought you were a better man than that.”

  “I didn’t go after her,” Lucas answered in a wooden voice as he shoved his chair back and stood. “Easton confronted her in my office and I could see she was close to a nervous breakdown. I did what I would’ve done for anyone—I helped her deal with it. I don’t really see this as any of your business.”

  They eyed each other in silent combat. Lucas was taller, but Roger had the asset of built muscles. Still, Lucas didn’t back down. He never did, and Roger got the message.

  “Hell, man, I don’t want to fight,” Roger said.

  “Neither do I,” Lucas responded. “I think we both need to focus on keeping Blair safe.”

  “That’s always been my goal.”

  Lucas took a deep breath. “I talked with Raye and I don’t think his gang is involved in the harassment. He said Big Joe’s taken over and he wasn’t interested in avenging anything.”

  “He lied to you.”

  “What?”

  “Big Joe hasn’t taken over. There’s a war going on between Big Joe and Raye’s followers. Nothing’s been settled. Most of them are waiting for the sentencing, to see who they’ll follow.”

  “Damn, I would’ve sworn Raye wasn’t lying.”

  “You’re losing it, Lucas, if you’re starting to believe criminals like Raye.”

  Lucas objected to the tone of that and it showed in the darkening of his eyes. “If you came here to warn me off Blair, consider it done.”

  Roger nodded and walked to the door. “And Roger…” Lucas stopped him. “Don’t warn me again. If Blair and I decide to take our relationship a step further, that has nothing to do with you.”

  Roger gritted his teeth and swept through the door.

  Lucas resumed his seat with a grim expression. He liked Roger—always had—but when it came to Blair, no one was going to tell him what to do. No one but Blair.

  He glanced at the telephone, feeling a need to hear her voice, but he didn’t call. She was with her family, he felt sure—which was where she should be.

  BLAIR SPENT Sunday with her parents. They’d heard about Easton and they were worried. Her father had arranged for her car to be brought over, so at least she had her transportation.

  They had a family dinner with Natalie, Calvin, Tiff and Uncle Howard. It was what Blake needed—his family’s support. Her father had apologized to him for the outburst in Lucas’s office and that seemed to make a world of difference. Slowly, surely, this tragedy was pulling them together in a way Blair had never expected.

  Uncle Howard had left after dinner and she never got a chance to talk to him about the Culver family, but she decided she’d rather hear it all from Lucas. She enjoyed her visit with Blake, talking about old times and sharing fears—and dreams—about the future. They were bound together by a single birth, but sometimes she felt she didn’t know him at all. At other times, she felt as if she knew him as well as she knew herself. These contradictory emotions were disturbing, but they were twins and nothing would ever change that.

  She did wonder whether things would have turned out differently if she’d been more considerate of his feelings when they were small, if she hadn’t stolen the spotlight with her grades and achievements. They were such big ifs and she didn’t have any answers. All she knew was that she couldn’t change history. She could only help Blake now and make sure the future was brighter than the past. She hoped that was possible.

  She and Blake played tennis on Sunday afternoon. She had to practically twist his arm. But in a matter of minutes she had him laughing as she danced across the court and bowed gracefully at his feet. Lucas had taught her that they had to laugh or they weren’t going to make it through this.

  Afterward, they had one of their mother’s mouthwatering suppers. They sat around the kitchen table talking and trying to avoid the horror that was hanging over them, but it was never very far from either one.

  Blake and her parents tried to persuade her to spend the night, but she wanted to go back home—in case Lucas called. She’d waited for him to call yesterday, but he hadn’t. And he didn’t call this morning, either. Roger had phoned, but it wasn’t the voice she’d wanted to hear—the voice that teased, cajoled and revitalized her. The voice that made her feel safe and secure in herself and her emotions.

  Why hadn’t Lucas called?

  Did men kiss with such passion and then never call? She was beginning to wonder if she’d exaggerated it, made it something more than it was. Lucas had been put out with her when they parted and she wasn’t sure why. Because of Roger?

  Then it hit her. It was the weekend and Lucas surely had a date. She suspected he didn’t spend his weekends alone. He was probably with Jennifer. Was she stupid, or what? Lucas would much rather spend his off time with someone who was gorgeous and carefree instead of someone whose life was crumbling around her. She was so stupid. But it didn’t matter. Lucas had touched her heart. He had reached through the pain, anguish and fear and she had opened up to him like a thirsty flower to the misty rain. He had encouraged her to talk, to laugh and enjoy herself in spite of all the terrible things. Through that, she’d found an inner strength she hadn’t even realized she possessed and now she could face the future—no matter what. And that wasn’t stupid at all.

  In the end, she decided to spend the night. She didn’t see any reason to go home and wait for the phone to ring. If Lucas was going to call, he would have called by now. She had enough sense to know that.

  ON MONDAY Lucas was at work before seven. The offices were dark and quiet and he needed this solitary hour to gather his thoughts for the week ahead. But when he tried to concentrate on Blake Logan, Blair kept intruding. He’d have to do something about that. She was controlling his mind and his heart. No woman had ever had this effect on him before, and he wasn’t comfortable with the feeling. But all he could think about was Blair, warm and tantalizing and… Oh, he was in deep—too deep. Now what? He was forty-two years old and he wasn’t sure what he should do. That was so ironic.

  He thought abo
ut Roger’s feelings for Blair. He’d never moved in on another man’s woman—never intended to sink to that level. But then, the woman had never been Blair. He wondered how she felt about Roger. She’d seemed genuinely glad to see him the other night, even asked him to come in when— Okay, that had bothered him and he’d been jealous. Now he could look at things more clearly.

  How did Blair feel? That was the big question—but not really. She was so consumed with fear and with the uncertainties in her life that she was struggling just to stay afloat. She needed time and support from the people around her.

  He could feel himself backing off. For her sake, he was willing to take it slow. He had to put all his effort into this trial and set his personal feelings aside—somehow. And if Roger was the man she wanted, then he’d make damn sure Roger was good enough for her. Oh yeah, he’d just keep telling himself that and maybe he’d believe it—someday.

  AN HOUR later, Sam walked into his office. “Good morning, Lucas.”

  Lucas raised his head. “Morning.”

  Sam took a seat and crossed his legs. “I brought Blake in. He’s with Greg now.”

  “Good, good,” Lucas replied, flexing his tired shoulder muscles.

  Sam watched him closely. “How long have you been working?”

  “Nonstop all weekend,” Lucas admitted.

  “Damn, you’re going to get burned out before the trial even starts.” His tone wasn’t accusing but concerned.

  Lucas shook his head. “Don’t worry, I need very little sleep and I have lots of energy. Besides, I’ve learned how to pace myself.”

  “Still…” Sam hesitated, then threw up his hands. “What the hell do I know? I seem to have made a mess of everything.” He got up and shoved his hands into his tailored slacks. “Thank God Howard’s gone back to wherever the hell he hibernates. He says I’m controlling and manipulative and I’ve destroyed my kids’ lives. He doesn’t have kids, so he doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about.”