Althea: A Story of Love

by Philip Rastocny

  As we sat there under the cedar trees, I remember looking back into her eyes and saying, “I love you too, Althea. Our life is just perfect.” She put her head against my shoulder and I warmly wrapped my arms around her. Amidst the chirping birds and scampering lizards we were as close to heaven as we could come.

  Memories of pleasant times gone by flashed into my mind like bolts of lightning in a thunderstorm. To see the stark contrast of these memories against the reality of her struggle today made me long for those happier times. Recalling my own eight-year recovery from the concussion brought on by my motorcycle accident, I thought to myself, Will Althea’s recovery take that long?

  Standing by her bedside after surgery, with all of the life support systems helping her survive, seemed so long ago. Standing by her bedside now barely three months later, I see her doing so well. As she rested, I prayed to myself that this speedy recovery would continue and soon she would return to normal. Compared to others with this condition, her rapid progress showed me something else helped her get well. I believed this to be the Creator.

  Like her commitment to the Sun Dance, this recovery would be no small feat to achieve. It was going to take time—a long time. Hope lay at the end of this road, hope for a complete recovery.

  Stirring in bed, Althea must have felt my presence and she started to wriggle under the covers. “Mmm…Good morning,” she said squinting and stretching.

  “Good morning, my love. How are you today?” I replied leaning down to embrace her between yawns and sighs. Reaching out, she pulled me down to her and we hugged.

  “Let’s go out to the bench today,” Althea said as she tossed off the covers. “I feel pretty strong.”

  Althea crawled out of bed and quickly got dressed. Scurrying about the kitchen, I rushed into my morning routine. I would never have anticipated we would be going back out to that bench so soon.

  “Can you bring out my coffee?” Althea asked as she started her slow walk to the side door.

  “Of course. Let me help you down the stairs and get you settled first.”

  The side door was only a few steps from her beloved bench. Althea, grasping the railing with both hands and me standing behind her ready to catch her if she fell, stepped twice down the stairs and then onto the ground. Her balance was still a bit shaky but she managed to walk unaided the twenty feet over to the awaiting bench. Plopping down, she scanned her surroundings and said, “This is nice.”

  I dashed back into the house and returned with two fresh cups of our favorite morning coffee. Sitting on the bench next to her, I held her hand gently in mine as we sat there in the morning sun.

  The heat of the day made us scoot the bench further back into the cedar trees where their shade kept us comfortable. Althea is still prone to heat stroke when exposed to direct sunlight for more than fifteen minutes at a time, so we are cautious when venturing outdoors.

  “We are sitting on the bench and drinking our coffee just like I had sketched, so maybe today will be the day we will spot the hawks.” I said in support. Althea scanned the skies, but alas, none were seen.

  We sat there holding hands for a while and then I got up and watered the plants. The flowers below the bathroom window were just starting to droop and were looking for a quick drink. I got up and poured some water from our rain barrels into the watering can and quenched their thirst.

  “The flowers are so pretty this year, so dainty and colorful. The cedar smell is intoxicating,” I said as I sat back down.

  We sat there sipping on the coffee and as we were almost finished, Althea spotted something out of the corner of her eye. Twisting her head around, she followed a black dot soaring through the high puffy clouds. “Look!” she exclaimed pointing up to the sky. “There…look there!”

  Althea’s eyes were indeed like an eagle’s and she could make out small details at a great distance where mine could not. Without glasses, I could easily focus on a book but anything further off appeared incredibly blurry. My distance glasses helped me see further but I cannot resolve the details Althea can with her unaided eyes. Shading my eyes with my hand, I squinted through my glasses at the area around the cloud and could not see a single thing moving through the air. And then, there it was…a hawk just to the east.

  “I see it! There it is!” I replied equally as excited.

  As we watched the hawk float effortlessly in the high winds soaring in ever widening circles, it moved toward us on our small bench as if it had heard Althea’s squeals of glee. “It’s headed this way,” she said excitedly.

  Like a sailboat catching a stiff breeze, the hawk abruptly broke off its circular path and swooped near where we sat. Althea looked into my eyes with joy written all over her face. Raising her cup, she said, “This is a great day!”

  I raised my cup to hers and with my heart pounding, they clinked, we held hands, and sipped just like in the sketch I drew in the hospital room. Today was that day where we would see at least one hawk.

  We watched the hawk circle again, this time directly over our heads lingering there until our coffee cups were drained. “Thank you Creator. Thank you for this gift of the hawk,” Althea cried into the sky. “Thank you!” she repeated with tears of joy streaming down her cheeks.

  That’s all I needed to get tearful too. Seeing Althea crying and seeing the hawk above made my eyes stream full of tears. As we hugged each other and being consciously in the moment, I felt a deep connection to the Creator I had almost forgotten. Much like our wedding vows, I was carried away in a feeling of complete euphoria. Like a mother wrapping her arms around her children, we sat there feeling blessed and nurtured. Such elation rarely happens. To stay conscious in that moment, to abandon all triviality around us, made this single event even more special.

  With goose bumps all over my arms, we smiled at each other and said nothing. After all, how can anyone improve upon perfection with words? Drinking in the feelings of love from the Creator just like the flowers taking in the drink of water I had just given them, we both came to life and new energies sprang from within. Althea’s complete curing seemed unstoppable now with this sign.

  Was this coincidence? Maybe it is to those who believe in coincidence. But to us, it was much more. Our Native American teachers taught us to keep alert to messages from the animals and these messages were now unfolding in front of our eyes. Not only did we see a hawk, but it also flew toward us and then hovered overhead. It was as if it were affirming to us that our sincere prayers, hopes, and dreams were heard by the Creator.

  As the hawk continued to circle above, climbing higher and higher until it was out of my view, Althea continued to watch it with her eagle-like eyes and I went back inside the house to refill our cups. Upon my return, I handed her the cup and she said with even more joy in her heart, “I saw a second hawk when you went inside.”

  Miracles happen and this was our miracle. Holding our focus of Althea’s complete recovery for one hundred and twenty one days without wavering was rewarded with this sighting today. Althea is indeed sitting on her bench smiling, holding her coffee cup high into the sky just as I had pictured it in my mind. She saw two hawks fly overhead just as I had drawn it, although I was inside.

  “This is a powerful moment,” Althea said completely overwhelmed by her emotions. “This is wonderful. Thank you for planting this glorious vision into my heart.” We sat there scanning the skies for the return of the hawks but as we finished our second cup of coffee, none returned.

  Some moments in time are locked into your memory and you can relive them in an instant. Like the tragedy of the airplanes crashing into the Twin Towers in New York City, you can recall exactly where you were and what you were doing when this happened, so can we recall this moment as if it were frozen in time. I can still see the glow of the sun on this hawk’s flight feathers as it twisted in the air. Catching every updraft it could, its tail contorted left, then right steering it back onto its path.

  Like walking off of the Red Road, this hawk felt
the same thing when it had drifted from the path of the updraft and changed its focus back to its flight. All it had to do is nudge its tail just a bit and it was back on track. Just as our hearts were filled with reassurance from above, so did this hawk find flight in the gifts of the winds.

  We walked back inside once the heat became unbearable leaving this moment behind. Glancing one last time at the bench before going in the door, Althea said, “That was magical!”

  We went back inside and sat down in the living room. I sat on the floor in front of her holding her hands and staring into her eyes. So caught up in this moment, we had to take time to drink it all in.

  “I appreciate you being here with me, right here, right now,” I said from the floor.

  Smiling back at me, she squeezed my thumb in her hand and replied, “I am glad to be here too.”

  Chapter 32 — February 1, 2009 — Day 347

  * * *

  “So, is that all there is?” Althea said as we left the small mountain church. “I expected so much more. These teachings feel punitive and fall short of my spiritual expectations. I don’t believe the Creator put me here to be miserable. My heart is not aligned with what I just heard.”

  Words like this often fell from Althea’s lips as we tried over and over to find a church that consistently invited the love of the Creator into our lives. Searching for spiritual peace is a goal for most human beings. Around the world, societies find ways to make sense of blessings and tragedies by acknowledging that the wisdom of a higher power is in charge. Behind amazing events—like births, deaths, abundance, and struggles—people cling to a reassurance that their finite minds cannot grasp the infinite plan.

  Althea explored numerous avenues of mainstream spirituality, trying them on like a new pair of shoes. Some were spiritual, some friendly, others traditional, but none gave her the feeling of being the right fit. Abandoning mainstream religions for Native American beliefs, this spirituality valued personal connections and found meaning in the relationship with all things. But the spiritual climb continued and her body changed unable to tolerate the extreme conditions encountered in Native American ceremonies.

  Metaphysics combined with her Native American foundation folded eastern teachings and practices into her belief system. Readings from well known psychics and attending spiritual workshops brought her closer to finding the ultimate spiritual connection with the Creator she had so long sought.

  Twenty minute meditations while maintaining positive focus became routine in her daily spiritual practices. Weekly Native American ceremonies complimented everything she was learning and wanting. With each passing day, she subconsciously knew she was getting closer to something big, something that would catapult her spirituality to a new level.

  Excited about this possibility, her prayers and meditations became more intense and her thirst for spiritual nirvana accelerated. More books and more understanding flowed to her like a waterfall plunging through the air, effortlessly moving toward a revelation. In her meditations, something changed and she felt like she was being spiritually attacked. Sudden jolts of energy surged through her limbs and she reacted defensively to them.

  Performing ancient Native American shielding techniques to ward off such unwanted and invasive energy proved to be only marginally successful. As she continued reading about eastern enlightenment, these unusual physical disturbances intensified. About two years before her stroke, at the youthful age of fifty five, she surrendered to one of these surges. Instead of resisting, she had a breakthrough.

  Spiritual bliss is often experienced in group gatherings where hundreds of people of like-minded faith come together and—in frenzy—connect to a spiritual rapture. In her own spiritual practices, she found this level of bliss typical in almost any Native American ceremony and in some metaphysical events. But what she encountered in this particular meditation was hundreds of times more intense than anything she had previously encountered.

  Her state of bliss magnified to the point where it filled every cell in her body. Soothing and peaceful, this bliss radiated from her face like a candle in the darkest night. She had found her spiritual journey. She knew she was on the right track.

  Not understanding exactly what had happened, she disregarded its origin and surrendered to its charm. Each time she relaxed, she was taken to this place of ecstatic bliss. Meditating longer and longer to retain this feeling, she found that it too was changing. Sharp jolts of energy surged through different parts of her body interspersed with moments of bliss.

  Like a stiff breeze blowing against bare arms, this jolting energy intensified at times to the threshold of being painful. Surrendering again to this intense surge brought her to a new state of bliss and another level of understanding. As time passed, more and more jolts came with less and less bliss. It was as if this spiritual energy was working on different parts of her body purging and healing her as it surged.

  Months passed and this pattern escalated. Every time she meditated, this energy was there. Quicker and quicker these jolts appeared to the point where even under a light meditative state such surges resounded. Before meditation was a pleasant experience and now it transformed into a challenge. One day, this energy showed up unexpectedly while sitting in her favorite chair.

  “Ouch! I feel an energy jolt my arm,” she said as her arm flung in the air twitching uncontrollably.

  “What is it?” I asked curiously.

  “I’m not sure. Until now, I’ve only felt like this in meditations. But this feels like the same energetic surges and I am wide awake. Ouch! There it is again.”

  What started out as an occasional blissful meditation has after two years transitioned into a non-stop healing experience. During her meditations, vibrant visions of a serpent coiling around a central staff appeared as if it were a sign from the Creator. Already aware that the serpent was a sacred animal to Native Americans, she researched what this vision might mean.

  Rod of Asclepius

  In her search, she found the symbol in her vision was the Rod of Asclepius. From Greek mythology, Asclepius, his wife Epione, and all of their children were associated with the medical arts. Hygiene, medicine, healing, health, and curing were all attributed to the skills possessed by this mythological family. This same symbol remains in use by the American Medical Association and is universally understood to be the symbol for healing.

  Continuing her research, one eastern experience rose to the surface whose symptoms perfectly matched Althea’s: the Kundalini Awakening. During her energy surges, the same energy points of the body routinely received these surges. Originally starting in her lower body, this energy moved up her spine and twisted around it, much like the vision of the Rod of Asclepius.

  The Kundalini Awakening is typically a long and involved process rather than an individual event. Taking many years to complete, an Awaking can involve bizarre and sometimes painful experiences after which enlightenment is achieved. From her brief exposure, she agreed with these traditional eastern views and knew she was in it for the long run.

  Althea’s Kundalini experiences grew and grew and just before her stroke, their intensity and frequency peaked. A single day did not go by when she did not surrender to its blissful appeal. She used a term of understatement to describe this intense process, saying she was cooking. Much like a cake cooking in the oven, so Althea saw her process taking time to bake.

  While cooking, despite her focus on calming herself and slowing her body down, her blood pressure would rise in response in response to the sporadic jolts. Often, she would feel dizzy and disoriented requiring time to stand or fully awaken. Aware of her physical struggle and that surges in blood pressure may threaten her life, I was concerned about her safety immediately following her surgery. If a strong spike in energy entered her frail body, it could prove to be fatal. I was worried.

  Wanting to allow Althea her own choices, I was confused about what to do. My dilemma grew regarding where her personal boundaries ended and where mine bega
n. I wrestled with praying and thought of asking for a delay in her Awakening. But after a long introspective meditation, I decided I could not interfere. Althea’s choices were hers alone and I had no right to interfere.

  I did decide I could explain my concerns in my prayers thereby reminding the spirits working with her of the potential harm. In a quiet moment on the second day after her surgery, I closed the door to her room in ICU to assure our privacy. With complete clarity and presence of spirit, I spoke these words aloud.

  “Creator, I come to you in prayer expressing concerns. As you know, Althea’s physical state is fragile now that she is recovering from her stroke. She struggles to stay alive and with your help she will return to full health. But Creator, I want only to remind you of her sensitive condition. She is not as strong as she was before, and small changes in her blood pressure could cause the stroke to reappear. The Kundalini causes her blood pressure to rise, and I know You are behind her enlightenment. I wish only to remind You that the intense energy surges she experiences during her Awakening could threaten her life. If it is Your will, refrain from such surges for at least six months. Keep her condition ever present in Your awareness and when she can physically handle it, let this Kundalini Awakening return.”