Labeled Love

by Danielle Rocco

  She hesitates. I know she doesn’t want to leave me, but I can see it written all over her face. I know this girl. Her emotions can’t be hidden. “I have to go.” She pauses, looking around at the thinning crowd. “Thanks for coming. I love you, Jace.”

  She gives me a big hug, and I lift her off the ground. “No one picks you up but me,” I whisper against her soft hair. She giggles. Sucking my bottom lip between my teeth, I bring her close to me. Brushing my lips against hers, she lets out a soft moan.

  “No one gets these lips but me,” she says sweetly.

  “No way. My lips really like yours.”

  “You’re so silly,” she says. We stare at each other briefly. I just want to take her in.

  One of the other cheerleaders yells out, “Shay, let’s go.”

  Jules waves at me as I see her walking with the other girls. Shay gives me one more kiss. “Go on. I’ll see you next week,” I tell her. She walks toward the others, but pauses and walks back to me. I pull her snug against me.

  “I wish I would’ve driven tonight.” She pouts.

  I give her my smile that she loves, even though I’m feeling uneasy inside. “If it meant I got a few more minutes with you, I wish you had driven, too.” She presses her face into my neck, and I breathe her in, taking her pretty face in my hands. “I love you so much. Have fun tonight.” It killed me to just say that. Not that I don’t want her to have fun, but I’m jealous.

  Softly, she says, “How are you getting home?”

  I wave her off. She knows I’m not getting a ride. She bites her bottom lip with a struggled sigh and walks away. As I watch her, everyone is laughing and cheering the team on in victory, but Shay keeps looking back at me.

  When she gets to the parking lot, I know I should turn around and head to the bus stop, but I can’t. I always watch her until I can no longer see her. I haven’t looked away since that very first day. I will always watch her until she is out of my sight. Suddenly, she stops and says something to Jules. The next thing I know my girl is back in my arms.

  Practically knocking me off my feet, she says, “I love you, Jace.” I can barely hear her between her ragged breaths and shaky voice from sprinting back to me. Her eyes meet mine with sadness. “More than anything.” My heart hammers in my chest, feeling like it could crack open with how much I feel for this girl. I kiss her again, patting her butt while trying desperately not to show her how uneasy I feel inside. “I just want you to know how happy I am that you came to see me.”

  “I love you, pretty girl.”

  And then she’s gone.

  When I walk away from the school, the differences hit me like a freight train, as the scenery changes from her world back to mine. I’m not naïve. I know I’m not cut from the same thread as Shay, and I probably never will be. One thing that I’m one hundred percent sure of, though, is she belongs with me. We belong together.

  Once I get home, Landon stops by and asks me to go to a party with him. I decide to go. When we get there, the first person I see is Kayla. She eyes me up and down. Why did I come? I know it’s only because I’m jealous Shay is at a party with Cole.

  I follow Landon to the back of the house, and what happens next I never expected, but I know I have to leave. I should have never come here.

  “WELL, LOOK WHO showed up today,” Adam says, giving me a sarcastic grin as I stroll through his door. “What’s the occasion? Do you finally have time in your busy schedule for me?”

  Adam is probably in his early thirties. His cool beach boy vibe gives the impression of more of a teenage surf bum rather than one of the most talented guitar instructors in the business. He can write and sing, too, which pretty much makes him a triple threat. Everyone wants to work with him, and he wants to work with me.

  “Well, you know, it is hard to keep up on the teen social calendar these days. It’s not like when you were a teen, Adam.” I give him a little smirk as I set down my guitar and plop down on his comfy couch.

  “Oh, yeah, I doubt that. I assure you, I was a pretty busy boy,” he answers cheerfully.

  I roll my eyes and decide to mess with him.

  “I’m sure you were. I bet camping trips with the Boy Scouts kept you all kinds of busy.”

  “Do I look like a Boy Scout to you? I was busy fighting off all the local babes that were vying for my attention all day long. You have no idea how tiring that can be for a young stud.” He gives me a goofy smile, and I start laughing.

  “I bet that was stressful, Adam, but kids today… We’re like business people. Do you know how hard it is for us to keep up with all of our social media accounts? Talk about stress.” I take in a dramatic sigh. “It’s a lot of work making sure the world knows I just ordered my favorite coffee. Oh, and it’s tough always looking good, so my selfies are perfect.” I throw myself back against the couch in what Jace would call “dramatic”. Putting my hand over my flushed face, I look up to Adam; he’s shaking his head. “Oh, wow, I forgot the most important things I have to do every day. I have to spend as much time as possible with my hot boyfriend and do homework and go to cheer practice. That’s a full load, Adam.”

  “You’re right. That’s a whole lot of fucking shit to do every day. I could never keep up with that.”

  “Oh, don’t act like you don’t check out social media. I just saw you on Twitter the other day.”

  “Yeah, yeah. I have to follow what you’re up to somehow. So, what’s up? Are you back to grinding it out with me? You ready to start making some shit happen?”

  “I’ve been writing a lot, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m not sure if I’m ready to hit the studio yet.”

  “Why?”

  I think for a minute about my reasons. I don’t want to say that it’s because of school. Honestly, I’m not sure if I’m going off to college.

  Do I really need to go to college to earn a music degree? No, I don’t need a degree. Would it benefit me? Yes, but only so I can say I have a degree in music. Besides, I have no problem getting into the music business. My dad would have a studio reserved for me tomorrow if I asked him to.

  The reality is, my two great loves, Jace and music, are right here. They will always be what I’m passionate about, so I don’t feel the need to have to leave for college to find myself. My path was chosen a long time ago, and I don’t ever want to be away from Jace.

  “I’m just not ready,” I say, looking over at Adam. “You know as soon as I record, Dad’s going to drive me crazy to put it out there. I’m still uncertain if I want to be in front or behind the microphone.”

  “I get you.”

  “I do want to work on a song that I’ve been writing for a while.” Songs don’t generally take me more than a couple of hours to write. I’m that good, but this isn’t any song. This is my song to Jace.

  Grabbing my guitar, I sit up tall on the couch and start strumming the chords that I first created when I was twelve years old after I got home the day I met Jace. Everything that day is pretty much a blur in my mind except when I met him. That entire moment is rooted deep within me. I remember what he was wearing, what he said to me, and how he looked at me. I remember every single second of that part of my day. I don’t think a girl forgets the moment she finds her one.

  Letting the melody overtake me, I close my eyes, and I’m there. Pale blue eyes, messy black hair, tight T-shirt. I can see his eyes look into mine. Yeah, that moment is totally tucked away as my most precious memory. The song is pretty emotional from the very first note. I play it out in its entirety while Adam sits in silence. When the last note leaves me, I open my eyes.

  “Damn, Shay. That’s really good. It reeled me in the moment you started strumming.”

  “I know, right? It just hit me hard from the moment I started playing.” I beam proudly.

  “You wrote that?” I shake my head. “That is so beautiful. If that ever hits the air waves, you are going to be a star.”

  “I doubt I would be a star. That song is very personal to me,
so I’m not really sure if I want to share it.” I set my guitar down. Adam picks up his phone and fiddles with it. With a sly smirk, he holds it up. All of a sudden, I hear my voice. “You recorded me?”

  “I had to. I want you to listen to it. It’s different than just singing the song. You need to hear how incredible you sound, so I recorded you raw. You’re the real deal. When most singers go into the studio, they can’t play any instruments, but they’re nice to look at. They can carry a tune good enough to be labeled a singer. Commercially, they have what it takes, but there are very few true artists. You are an artist. Looks aside, because come on, you are a stunning girl.”

  “Are you flirting with me, Adam?”

  “Hell no. You’re crazy if you think I would mess with your dad. I’m not blind, though, Shay. You’re growing up to be a very beautiful woman, but with that, you have a raw talent that is special. You can play the piano and guitar by ear, you can create the most alluring sounds, and your voice… Well, your voice is unique. It’s soft like your natural sound, but when you want that sexy, sultry, you get this rasp in your tone that is melodic.”

  For the first time, I picture myself on a stage. Lights blaring, fans singing the lyrics to my songs—the songs I wrote, the songs that I put my heart and soul into. I can see Jace on the side of the stage when I come off, lifting me off my feet and telling me how proud he is of me. I love that scenario. Wait. Total light bulb moment happening here. Jace and I… Oh my God. We could be a duet. That would be so amazing. I bite down on my lip, all giddy. Tucking away that little thought for now, I turn to Adam.

  “Someone looks happy,” he says.

  “You’re right. It’s pretty cool hearing myself recorded.”

  “Do I detect someone’s wheels turning a bit?”

  I press my thumb and index finger together, keeping a little space between them. “Maybe just a teeny tiny bit,” I say, animated. He chuckles.

  “I’m glad to hear. You should be excited. Your talent is pretty extraordinary.”

  I smile, slightly shrugging my shoulders. “I’ll be back in a few weeks once football season is over.”

  “Sounds good,” he says as I walk out of his front door with excitement.

  As I leave Adam’s, I have a new sense of what I’d like to do with my music. Sitting in my car for a while, I replay my song he forwarded to me. I have to say, it sounds really good. When I get into the studio, it will be even better.

  Before I go home, I make a last-minute decision. Jace’s birthday is in a few days, and I want to get him something special, something I’m hoping he will love and realize he should be doing. Just thinking about the possibilities of making music together is exciting to me, but I need him to see it, too. I need him to believe in himself the way I believe in him. I pull into my favorite music store, and with the line of credit my family has and the approval of my dad to purchase things on my own, I walk inside and head straight to the acoustic guitar section.

  “Hey, what’s up, Shay?” a guy asks me. I turn my head to see the clerk that always helps me when I come in. Shaggy long hair and bright green eyes smile as I make my way to the guitar that catches my eye.

  “Hey, Drew.” I take the guitar and sit down with it.

  “That’s a great guitar, but it’s not a Taylor.”

  “Yeah, I’m not worried about it being a Taylor. It’s for my boyfriend, and he won’t care about that. I just wanted to get him one he could play when he’s at home. The Taylor will come later,” I say with a huge smile just thinking about it. “Definitely. This is a great guitar.” I hand it to Drew. “Charge it to my account, please.”

  “Sure, no problem. I will go ring it up.”

  “Thanks, Drew,” I say, picking out a case for it, so it’s perfectly protected.

  As I head out of the store, I think about our song. I have an idea of how I want to present it to Jace as a gift, but I need to find the perfect time to do it. I want it to be special for him. Something he can hang on to. Right now, though, I’m just excited that he will have his own guitar.

  JULES TEXTED ME earlier asking if I wanted to lounge by the pool this afternoon, and once I pull into the driveway, I see her car. My parents aren’t home. They had a function in Santa Barbara that family friends were hosting, and they took the twins with them.

  Before I meet up with Jules, I check the mail. My heart beats full of love when I see a letter addressed to me from Jace. I rip it open. It’s a torn-out piece of paper from a notebook with the biggest heart smack-dab in the middle of it. It’s simple, just like my boy, but the words are perfect.

  I love your smile. I love your voice. I love your salty lips by the ocean shore. I just want you to know how I feel. I love you, baby.

  He even drew a sunset. Putting the note to my lips, I kiss his loving words before folding it neatly and placing it back into its envelope. It will go in my special box along with the others. Just seeing how much he gives me with his words, I know we could create the most romantic music together. It’s such a promising thought.

  Walking into the house, I throw my Louis Vuitton sunglasses on top of my head and make a quick trip to my room to put my guitar away and Jace’s birthday present, and then I safely tuck away my love note inside its box. I decide to put on one of my skimpier bikinis since it’s just Jules and I. I hear the music blaring out back. Grabbing my favorite sunscreen and my cell phone, I practically skip to the terrace. When I get out there, Jules is dancing around in her bikini. As soon as the song hits the chorus, she starts jumping up and down, singing at the top of her lungs.

  “And the whole world is whistling,” she sings. Running up to her, I grab her and throw us both into the deep end. Once we come up, we start laughing. “Life is good in the Hollywood Hills,” she says, choking on water as I dunk her. I have to agree. We have a pretty great life.

  I go under and swim to the shallow end. My thoughts are on my boy. God, I wish he were here with me. I haven’t talked to him since this morning, and he said he had some stuff going on. When I asked, he just said he had to help his mom with something. I don’t know if he was telling me the truth or not. I know Jace wouldn’t purposely lie to me, but as of late, he has been a little bit short with his answers. He doesn’t want me to worry, and of course, that makes me worry. He doesn’t get that.

  When I get to the shallow end, I lay my arms over the side of the pool and kick my feet while Jules goes to the bar and gets us a couple of bottled waters. I start to relax my mind filled with thoughts of Jace and the guilt I feel when I have days like this. Although I don’t know where he is, I don’t worry about whom he is with. I know he would never hurt me.

  Closing my eyes, I hear Jules on her phone while I let the calm water cool my shoulders as I dip them into the water. All of a sudden, I am splashed like a tidal wave just came through. “What the—” I have no time to react. I get pushed down, and big strong arms wrap around me. Not just wrap around me, practically maul me, dragging me under the water. Gasping, I swim to the surface. “What the hell, Cole?”

  He laughs as he grabs me again, fully pressing his taut chest against mine. Lowering his head, he presses his lips hard against my neck.

  Like hard.

  He’s going to leave a damn mark. I push him away, but he’s pretty dang strong. “Cole, stop.” Jules sees my struggle, jumps in, and gets right on his back.

  “That a girl! Pool Piggies!” Brett says before jumping in and grabbing me, trying to put me on his shoulders. I know Cole is just being himself, which means he’s trying to get a little closer to me, but I still love these boys. We all grew up together. Literally, we all had missing teeth together. So, I give in and let Brett put me on his shoulders, and we have a long, drawn-out battle of Pool Piggies. Yes, that’s what we’ve called it ever since the boys were strong enough to put us on their shoulders, and they are both strong. I will admit.

  Cole and Brett are pretty much the guys on campus and always have been. Brett has a long, lean, water polo body,
and the girls have always noticed his dark hair and big brown eyes. Cole is totally different in looks. He is bigger and broader, a total football boy. Well, he is the high school quarterback. Since he was a little kid, he’s been the quarterback. Cole’s cocky attitude and dirty blond hair with those hazel eyes reel all the poor girls in. I say poor girls, because Cole doesn’t care about anybody but himself. Unless you’re a lifer like Jules, Brett, and me, he blows most people off.

  Jules falls off Cole’s shoulders when I put a death grip on her. Brett and I cheer and laugh while Cole gets mad and hops out of the pool. “You’re such a baby, Cole. You can’t win everything,” I tell him as he looks over at me with scowl.

  Brett and I sit on the seat in the pool while Jules lies on a float. Brett looks at me with his big brown eyes.

  “So, are you going?”

  I let my fingers glide through the water and wiggle my toes. “Going where?”

  “To Devin’s party,” he says in his husky voice.

  “I don’t think so. I’m not a big fan of her.”

  “Why do you say that? I think she’s pretty cool.”

  “Of course she’s cool with you, Brett.”

  “Why do you say it like that?”

  “Do I have to spell it out for you? You’re a guy, and a good-looking one at that. Of course Devin is cool with you. I just find her on the snotty side. And, I’m not too fond of a comment she made at my sixteenth birthday party. So, anyway, maybe I will or maybe…”

  “You won’t,” he says, finishing my sentence with a little splash to my face.

  “I might go. It just depends if I have something going on that day.”

  I’d rather have teeth pulled.

  I glance over at Cole who is being very quiet. “What are you doing?” I ask when I notice he’s holding my phone.

  “Nothing,” he says, laying my phone down and putting his arms over the back of the lounge chair. “Why are you staring at me, Starkie? You ready to dump your boy from the hood to get with the real deal?” He gives me a smug smile. I don’t care how good-looking Cole is. When he talks about Jace, he’s ugly to me. I give him my biggest trademark smile.