Remember When...

by Scarlett Finn

  She shook her head. “No, and today he was wearing the same cufflinks he always wears, he wore them yesterday, he just tosses them on the nightstand and then uses them again the next day. I doubt he’s even opened the box.”

  He scowled. “Let’s not refer to you being anywhere near his bed again.”

  It was a reality whether he liked it not, whether she liked it or not. “Calvin can’t suspect anything from today because he hasn’t seen us together today. You left the bedroom before Cam and I did, and when we got downstairs everyone else was out. They assumed Cam and I were already out. So no one knows we weren’t up until late… I won’t be keeping Cam up late again, let me tell you. His sleeping in threw off the rest of my day.”

  She didn’t expect his kiss on the end of her nose. “I saw the pictures in my phone… that was an amazing surprise, baby. Thank you.”

  Oh, that felt like a lifetime ago, she hadn’t even thought about Shane finding the images when he was at his meeting. “Just Cam and me playing,” she said. “I was trying to distract myself.”

  “You should’ve told me about the rings before I went to the meeting.”

  She shook her head. “Now I’m beginning to think you’re the crazy one in this relationship. You were already late.”

  His frustration was aimed at himself. “I could tell there was something wrong when you put my cufflinks in. I should’ve pushed harder.”

  In an attempt to calm him, she softened her voice. “You’ll have to learn to trust me. If I say I’m ok then I’m ok… And if I say something can wait, then it can wait.”

  “Yes, mistress,” he hummed and nuzzled the side of her neck.

  “Dada! Dadee!”

  Ginger couldn’t keep him all to herself, so with an inhale, she pushed Shane back. “Cam missed you at dinner, didn’t see you at bedtime and he hasn’t had you at all today,” she said. “He’s been spoiled with your attention… don’t deprive him now. We still have some time before dinner although…”

  “You’re still worried about Bishop.”

  Typical that Shane could read her like an open book. “I just don’t understand the presents, I—”

  “Why can’t you go with your gut?” he asked.

  “Meaning?”

  “You thought I was trying to buy your and Cam’s love. I think he’s trying to do the same, or at least guilt you into thinking he’s the better option. Like you said, I’ve been spending a lot of time with Cam and he knows Cam is the way to get to you. He’s trying to buy you by buying Cam.”

  When he put it like that, she could see his point. It had been her instinct to assume the shallow gesture was some form of manipulation, why shouldn’t it be coming from Calvin? “You think that’s it?”

  Shane nodded. “Yep. The question is, what are we going to do about it?”

  The answer to that question was damn easy. “I’m going to tell him to send it all back,” she said, certain of that if nothing else.

  “Even though you don’t want to raise his suspicions?”

  As far as she could figure, it would be suspicious to have no reaction to this bizarre behavior. “I won’t be bought,” she said because it was true, but then lowered her volume. “We can’t take all that stuff one day and then dump him the next day. What does that say about me?”

  “If you want Cam to have it, I’ll reimburse—”

  She hit his chest. “If we want Cam to have those things we’ll order them ourselves. We’ll buy them for birthdays and Christmas and as our baby needs them. We will not take from another person. Not one like…” Oops, she was beginning to sound bitter.

  Shane loved it. “One like him? Oh, baby, I’m loving you more every minute. You’re right, I don’t want my son touching anything from him.”

  “Cam will want to play with the boxes, I’ll do my best to cover them up. Maybe…”

  “What?”

  “You could take him to the gift shop? Just get him something small to distract him otherwise he’ll think I’m a mean mommy stealing his toys.”

  “Ok, baby,” he said and kissed her jaw. “Do you need anything?”

  She shook her head and fumbled at her back for the door knob. “Something small, Shane. If it’s practical, all the better.” Ginger opened the door an inch. “You hear me?”

  “Yes, ma’am,” he said. “And what are you going to do while we’re out?” His brow wiggled. “My bed will be free if you want to—”

  Touching his lips to quiet him, she grinned and whispered. “If I keep taking care of myself all the time, what will I ever need you for?”

  Pulling the door open, Ginger tried to run away as Shane swatted her ass. Cam was just a couple of feet from the door, eating his fist, blinking up at her as she laughed. When her son saw that she was laughing, he laughed too, but immediately went to his father’s feet.

  “Dada!”

  Tugging on his jeans leg, Cam demanded attention. Shane picked him up and tossed him onto his shoulders, holding him in place with two hands flat on the baby’s back. Cam draped forward to drool and bury his face in his father’s hair. She’d never seen anything so amazing, and while admiring Shane, she thought that she might be forced to go with his suggestion.

  Until Owen spoke up and reminded her of their problem. “So can we unpack?” he asked. “Murphy said we shouldn’t accept this stuff? What’s going on?”

  Murphy might just know his brother well enough to assume his feelings, or maybe Shane had confided in him. Ginger couldn’t read any clue in his expression as Shane crossed the room with Cam still on his shoulders. “We’re going to the lodge, Ginny needs some alone time. Come on, uncles… let’s entertain the most valued member of our boys club.”

  19

  Ginger was trying hard not to think about what might be going on at the lodge, and what Shane might be buying for Cam, because they’d been away for quite a while. Maybe he hadn’t heard her when she’d said something “small.” Shane’s hearing did tend to be selective.

  Sitting on the porch swing with her legs stretched along it, Ginger was enjoying reading a book on Owen’s Kindle. So much so that she didn’t hear anyone approach.

  “Good read?”

  Glancing up, she saw Calvin standing at the end of the swing, leaning against the exterior kitchen door. “Yeah,” she said, smiling. “Surprisingly.”

  “Anything I’d know?”

  A few days ago, she’d have said no, now she had no idea. “It’s Shane’s book,” she said. “Weird that it turns out he did write a book after all.”

  “Probably ghosted,” Calvin said, coming to lift up her legs so he could sit beneath them. “It’s a biography?”

  “Kind of,” Ginger said, sitting up to cross her legs facing him so that she didn’t have to keep her legs over him. “It’s a kind of insider look at the corporate world of software engineering.” Smiling at Calvin’s frown, she shrugged. “It’s not as dry as it sounds.” Calvin would probably love to read anything written by such a successful man… any other successful man. He was never going to like anything from Shane’s hand. “He tells it through his own experience, names have been changed, but it’s littered with anecdotes and jokes… it’s funny.”

  “Hmm,” he sneered, resting his hand on her knee. She was pleased she’d put on her skinny jeans before coming out so she didn’t have to tolerate skin-on-skin contact. “Don’t you want to come inside? It’s cold out here.”

  “I’m fine,” she said, “I’m cozy.”

  His scowl turned to her torso. “Whose sweater is that?”

  She hadn’t thought anything of snagging the hoodie and hadn’t for a second thought it might offend anyone if she wore it… except maybe its owner. “Uh, Murphy’s I think. It was just lying on the back of the couch.”

  “If you’re cold, you should come inside.”

  “I’m not cold,” she said and was reminded of the reason she’d wanted to come out here other than it being Shane’s chosen spot. “I’d prefer to be out here
than sit and look at that extravagance in there.”

  The angle of his head shifted. “I thought… I assumed Cam was out with Warren, that you were waiting until he got back to unpack.”

  So he’d come out here for praise? Had Calvin assumed she’d leap up and throw herself at him in gratitude? “No, Cam’s seen it. They’ve all seen it. I told them not to touch anything.”

  “But… why?”

  “Because you’re going to send it all back, Calvin,” she said, putting the Kindle up on the exterior kitchen windowsill behind them. “Why would you think Cam needed all that stuff? Why would you have it sent here? Why didn’t you discuss it with me first?”

  “It was meant to be a surprise,” he said, going on the defensive. “Some business associates of mine arrived at the lodge today, they’ll be staying while we complete our deal. I don’t know how long it will take, and I didn’t want you to be lonely and feel neglected. I’ll be spending more time up there with my associates while Boyd and I hammer it out. I was trying to be considerate. You were supposed to be happy. You’re always talking about how important Cameron is. I proved to you how seriously I take that.”

  Funny how as soon as Shane had important business, Calvin did too. “By spending a fortune on him? I don’t want him to be raised like that. I don’t want him to think that every time there’s a bump or someone’s trying to prove something that he’ll be used—”

  “Used? Buying him things he needs, that’s using him now?”

  “He doesn’t need—”

  “You’re using the top of a dresser as a changing table. That’s not its purpose. Why shouldn’t we have something functional?”

  The only function of a changing table was to be a safe place for the baby to have his diaper replaced. “I can change his diaper on the floor or on the bed,” she said. “We don’t need something so expensive… and so heavy, when we’re only here temporarily.”

  Calvin was offended, more than that, he was angered by her reaction. “So you want me to send everything back?”

  “Yes,” she said. “I—”

  “Mama!”

  Cam’s voice echoed through the kitchen. Shane came out the back door a minute later, carrying Cam. When she saw what he was wearing, she leaped to her feet. Her adrenaline had already been high, but she hit a major spike when she saw what her baby was wearing.

  “What is that?” she asked.

  “We got him swimming shorts,” Shane said. Murphy and Owen came out onto the porch carrying other bags. “I thought I could take him in the lake while the sun’s still out.”

  “The lake?” she asked. “Swimming shorts?” Calvin sniggered, but she ignored him to reach for her baby. “Give him to me.”

  “What?” Shane asked.

  He and his boys had been proud of themselves for their purchase. All Ginger felt was chilled to the bone. Her hands were already shaking, her throat was closing and panic was making her arteries pulse. “Give Cameron to me, Shane. Now!”

  “Ok, ok, it’s ok,” he said, handing Cam to her.

  Running her hand over him, Ginger found herself checking for injuries even though he’d only been gone for an hour. When it was clear her son was fine, she took the packet of water wings he was chewing on from his tiny hands and tossed it at Shane. “What the hell are you thinking?” she barked. “Water? You want to take him into the water?”

  “Yeah, I—”

  “No! You should’ve asked my permission! There is no way in hell that my baby is going anywhere near the water!”

  Calvin stood up and put an arm around her. “We’ll reimburse you for your… expenses, Warren,” Calvin said, looking down his nose at the shorts Cam was wearing. “Really, you should be more sensitive. You were told how she felt about water.”

  “Now wait a fucking minute,” Murphy said. “If his father says—”

  Ginger couldn’t contain her burning rage. “His father can kiss my ass!” She rarely swore with such vicious anger, so everyone was taken aback by her outburst. “There’s not a chance in hell I will let anyone risk the life of my child.”

  “Risk the—Shane has his lifeguard certificates,” Owen said. “He’d never let—”

  “Didn’t do her much good when she needed him,” Calvin sneered. “Where were those certificates when the boat they were on went down?”

  She couldn’t… Shane was saying nothing, he seemed so stunned, but her irrational terror didn’t allow her to feel sympathy. “Cameron is to never go near water,” she said to him, to all of them. “Never, you hear me?” Storming forward, she pushed through the men to get to the kitchen door. “If any of you even think about going against my wishes on this…” Her anger disgusted her. “I swear you’ll never lay a hand on my baby again.” Her focus went to Shane’s as Cam began to cry. “I don’t care who you are.”

  At first, Ginger thought she’d never calm down. Pacing in the bedroom, kissing her baby, she kept the door locked and fumed silently on her own. Cam was upset for quite a while and she hated herself for losing her temper in front of him. He wasn’t used to hearing arguments and he’d always been good at sensing her mood. When she was upset, he was upset. It wasn’t fair that she let her panic scare him.

  But the exchange worked the other way too.

  As she focused on calming her son down, she changed his clothes and played with him by blowing bubbles. They folded all the laundry too, though Cam preferred to wait until she was almost done so he could crawl through it and mess it all up again.

  He was fun. Hanging out with her baby levelled out her mood and as soon as it did, she began to look more rationally at her reaction.

  Her reflection wasn’t positive.

  She’d acted like a crazy person and there was no way she hadn’t hurt Shane with her final comment. The one thing she’d promised was that she wouldn’t keep him from his child and then she’d threatened to do exactly that.

  The time for dinner had come, but Ginger couldn’t imagine sitting around a table with the people she’d made a fool of herself in front of.

  Using the internal phone in the room that connected only to the lodge, she ordered food for herself and Cam. To make it fun for him, she laid out a blanket and used his plastic, pre-sterilized utensils to lay a table for him. Then she spent time dressing them both up.

  Doing her hair, Ginger put on her best dress and styled Cam’s hair using Shane’s hair wax that was in the bathroom. It smelled so incredible her eyes watered. She doubted that Shane would object to Cam using his products, even despite her craziness that day.

  She put Cam in his little suit that they’d brought with them, just in case he needed to be smart, because he hadn’t used it yet and she didn’t want it to be wasted. Cam laughed and played with her cosmetics bottles as she made an effort for her baby. She expected the food to take a while and so was surprised when there was a knock on the bedroom door as she was putting gloss on her lips.

  “Room service!”

  Ginger smiled at the sound of her brother’s voice and hoped he wouldn’t be too pissed at her. Cam was sitting on their picnic blanket laid out on the floor at the end of the bed, hitting two plastic bowls together, entertaining himself.

  She went to open the door. “Hey,” Ginger said as Owen held up a tray.

  “I guess you’re not joining us for dinner,” he said, examining her apparel. “Wow, I never knew there was five-star dining up here… You got a hot date?”

  “Yep,” she said, pushing the door further open to reveal Cam sitting up in his waistcoat and bowtie. “Isn’t he handsome?”

  Owen swooned. “Oh my god, you have to show Shane!”

  Her brother turned and inhaled as if he was going to shout, but she put a hand on his chest. “I can’t,” she whispered.

  He frowned. “Why not? You’re still pissed about—”

  “I acted like an idiot,” she said. Taking the tray from her brother, Ginger carried it over to the floor and put it down away from Cam.

  Owe
n came in and closed the door. “Everyone was shocked,” he said. “But no one thinks you were an idiot… well I do, but Shane and Calvin are so desperate to get into your underwear that they’d never say it.”

  His humor was appreciated, but she still felt like shit. “I would never keep them apart, Shane and Cam,” she said, sinking onto the rug next to Cam. “I just… I didn’t mean what I said.”

  “He knows that,” Owen said, sitting down beside her. He straightened a plastic fork and Cam punched his foot. “It never mattered how much you two fought, you always loved each other. Shane’s not angry… he’s worried about you.”

  Ginger groaned and flopped onto her side. “That makes me feel worse. Why does he have to be so… sweet?”

  “You trained him well,” Owen said and Cam punched his foot again. “Ow, what is with this kid and punching?”

  “Our restaurant is barefoot only.” Owen looked at her feet and Cam’s, she had proper dress shoes for her baby, but he sat better without them, so she’d foregone shoes too. “Besides, you know he likes to hit things,” she said. “Maybe Shane can teach him to box instead of how to swim.”

  Owen took off his shoes. “Only you would prefer a full contact sport over something completely passive like swimming.”

  Yes, she was an idiot, they’d established that. “Is he upset?” she asked. “I know I was irrational.”

  “So apologize.”

  How could her brother act like it was that simple? Ginger felt awful, like she’d crossed a line. “I don’t know if he wants to hear it… Where would I even begin?”

  “So ask for a minute alone, toss him on the bed and ride him hard. I guarantee he’ll forgive you after that.” Owen was teasing, but it was a shocking enough idea that Ginger sat up again. “It worked for you for years.”

  “It did not!”

  “You always resolved fights with sex… well maybe not resolved them but…” He tilted his head and peered at her like he felt sorry for her. “I don’t think you get the level of intimacy you two had, it was… complete, like nothing I’ve ever seen before. You were always touching. Like always. You never got over that fun sex part that most people only have at the start of their relationship. You used to play all these games, like role play and dressing up. You fed off each other. Sometimes he was so rough with you in public that people got worried… then I’d see you two alone two minutes later, hiding in some dark corner, he’d be on his knees pledged his undying love to you… You were best friends. Really. Absolute best friends. You just seemed to like being around each other, you liked hearing each other talk. You were so in love and—”