11 Hours

by Daniel Paul Singh

  “Calm down sir, relax. You are being treated” she told me.

  “Treated for what? Where am I? Whats this hospital?”

  “This is Saraswati Hospital in Perambalur. You had met with an accident a while ago and was brought here” she told me as she checked my pulse and noted down a few readings.

  “Accident!” I slowly remembered the lorry chasing us closely and we escaping at the very last moment only to be hit by a bus. The last I remembered was our car hitting against the median. The bus was coming at a slow speed and hence the impact should have been minimal. We should have been safe. We! It was we, I am here, where is Prabhu!!

  “Prabhu, where is my friend Prabhu? He was in the car” I panicked.

  “I am really not sure. They brought only you here”

  “No, my friend was the one who drove the car. Do you know who brought me here? Can I pull this glucose syringe? I have to go find him”

  “No, wait. Don’t pull that syringe. Let me remove it, and take this tablet and then you can go find him” she said and removed the syringe from my body.

  I got up and was about to move when she interrupted.

  “I heard that a couple of people died in that accident area earlier today morning. May be you might want to check the mortuary once as well.”

  “What in the world? Oh no... It can’t be. It shouldn’t be... Prabhu! Oh my freaking God! Why don’t you have some mercy on me?” I couldn’t come to terms with what she said. “Where is the mortuary?” I screamed.

  “Go straight and take the second left. You will find it. A ward boy will be there, ask him, he will show the bodies”

  Bodies!

  I rushed to the end of the room and took giant steps towards the mortuary. A teenager who was clothed in whites was standing in front of the door that read “Morgue”.

  “I want to see the two bodies which came in earlier today.” I told him amidst my heavy breathing.

  “Today we have had 5 bodies so far. Which one do you want to see? And how are you related?” he asked without an iota of concern.

  “That accident case! It happened close by. I don’t know the place. Heard two people came here. One of them” I paused and continued” is my friend” I uttered hoping it shouldn’t be true.

  “Oh, those two, the faces are not recognizable, anyways, follow me” he said and took me inside the room. It was freezing cold inside. He opened one drawer to show the first dead body, I could see only the face. It was mutilated, with glass pieces all over and dark red frozen blood smeared completely. It was nauseating and horrifying at the same time. I couldn’t exactly recognize him but was sure that it wasn’t Prabhu.

  “The other one?” I asked the ward boy.

  He moved towards another drawer. I prayed and hoped that it would’nt be Prabhu. It shouldn’t be him. It shouldn’t be that of a tall, lean, fair, guy. He slowly opened the drawer and pulled out the dead body. I had my heart in my mouth. My heart beat stopped. It was Prabhu’s. The face was not recognizable, it was full of frozen thick red blood, the skin was torn and the interiors were exposed, but the hair, the shape of the face, the skin color – it was all his. It was him. The world around me came to a standstill. My best friend had died.

  I broke down and cried, the ward boy didn’t even bother to console me. I stood near Prabhu’s lifeless face for a few minutes not knowing what to do. I wasn’t sure if I could touch his face. My dearest friend and brother was gone and I was the reason for it. I killed him. He had come all the way to Trichy just for me. He was the one who was guiding me, helped me in identifying the thought detector and finally saved my life by sacrificing his. He was my protector. I covered my face in my hands and sat on a nearby chair, dejected, not knowing the next course of action. I couldn’t bring myself to call and inform Prabhu’s dad, the guilt was killing me.

  He died for me, I should avenge his death. The Loser should answer for his loss in the most dreadful way possible. I wanted to kill that Loser right there and tear open his guts with my bare hands. I got a new vigor, a new purpose and a new determination to take up the task at hand. I must first save Diana and then finish the life of that Loser - for Prabhu, for Diana. I have to do it.

  I looked at the ward boy and asked,

  “What’s the time now? How far is Trichy from here?”

  “Its 5 am now. Trichy is about an hour’s drive from here” he answered, wondering why I asked such a silly question.

  I got up and walked out of the morgue, towards the exit door of the hospital. It was still dark outside, the sun was yet to make its visit to the earth. As I came out I saw several vehicles - cars and bikes, being parked in the parking lot. Cars! What happened to Prabhu’s car. What happened to it after the accident? I looked around in the parking lot for a damaged red color i20 with a Chennai registration number. Under the dim lights, I couldn’t find any such vehicle. There was no one around who could help, nor was there someone to whom I could enquire on how I was brought there. There was no car, no more Prabhu, the only other way to reach Trichy was to get a cab or a bus.

  The hospital was on the Chennai- Trichy highway. I stepped out of its gate, hoping to catch a bus or a cab and looked either ways to see in a distance, a red car. It was i20 and was parked near a street light a few meters away from the hospital. I could clearly see it being damaged. There was every chance for it to be Prabhu’s car, Who took it there? Were the Loser’s men still around?

  I ran towards the car as fast as I could and as quick as my weak legs could take me. As I approached closer, I found it to be standing in front of a mechanic shop. Why there?

  I came close to the car and was desperately looking for the mechanic when a hand touched me from behind. Taken aback, I turned around swiftly to punch the intruder and stopped half way, on seeing, Prabhu.

  “Holy mother of Christ! Prabhu, you are still alive. Thank goodness. I thought you were dead. I saw your corpse, in the mortuary just a while ago. How did you get your life back? Thank God you are safe man. Oh my God” I was overjoyed.

  “You saw me in the mortuary? Was it really me? Did you wear your lens properly Rob? Did you lose your vision after the accident? The doctor said there was no injury to the head and that you were safe, but didn’t tell that you could hallucinate”

  “Stop it, Prabhu, that body in mortuary was exactly like you, same hair, same skin color. I assumed it was you. Thank God. Wait, what are you doing here? Why did you leave me in hospital?”

  “Rob, a while after the accident I woke up and saw that you had lost consciousness. The car had jammed against the median and needed a repair. The folks in lorry who followed us had hit against the toll booth and both had died on the spot. I got out of the car with some help from the locals. Someone then took you out. We got lift from another car, who towed my car and took us here. As you were sleeping and being treated, I thought I will repair this car so that it’s ready to take us to Trichy. Is that enough?”

  “Who cares for these explanations? I am just happy that you are alive. Trichy is close by from here Rob. We can reach in an hour. We need to start now.”

  “Not until this car gets repaired”

  “Damn, man. You know, I am so thankful to the almighty that you are still alive. Its like a miracle. Ufff. I wonder what that LOSER Ganpath is planning now. He already showed us a near death experience. I just can’t picture anything in my mind right now“

  “Don’t picture anything Rob, relax”

  “Wait, picture! I had Ganpath’s picture in my phone. I had taken it at Ascendas. We could upload it in FB and check if any of my friends or your friends know his whereabouts”

  “Why didn’t you tell it all this while? Just take it out” he almost ordered me.

  I touched my shirt pocket to take my phone, it wasn’t there. There wasn’t a feeling of it being in my pant pockets either. Prabhu dialled my mobile and heard a Switched off tone.

  I panicked and ran back towards the hospital and checked everywhere, my phone wasn’t th
ere. The only contact I had with Loser and thereby with Diana, was lost.

  “Shit crazy Lord!! Someone has flicked my phone!” I punched the street lamp hard and sat dejected.

  ₪ ₪ ₪

  Chapter 18 The Confession I wanted to punch Brindha on her perfect teeth, but since she was at the other end of the call, I had to listen to what(ever) she had to say.

  “I think we should break up, this - whatever relationship of ours is.”

  “Whats there to break up, as if we are in a relationship” I retorted.

  “That’s what I said, whatever that is there between us, let’s end it here. Right now, right away. I can’t go through it all again from scratch. It doesn’t mean that we should stop messaging - we definitely can. Message me whenever you want to, I will respond and I will also text you when I feel so, but I wouldn’t be dependent on you like before” she said.

  “Bru, give it sometime. Don’t take any hasty decision”

  “It took me 24 hours to take this decision, Rob. It’s a well thought out one and I am clear about it. I know what I am doing. And thanks for everything” she said and ended the call.

  Helplessness was what I felt first, which aggravated into anger and then ended up as hate. She had manipulated everything to show it was my fault, completely ignoring the fact that I behaved so because she first started talking about her alliances, thereby rubbing me on the wrong side. She was equally responsible for everything that happened. I was upset. Though I knew that I wouldn’t go into a state of depression, the break up was doing its part to dispirit me already. It all ended up as if it was my mistake. We officially broke up.

  I didn’t feel like calling her back. This was how it was supposed to end but I didn’t expect it to happen so abruptly. I looked at my phone and skimmed through all her old messages. I controlled a split second anger to delete them all. I wanted to savor it. I felt heavy and sat down to write a poem, the best way I knew to heal my soul.

  The next morning, I didn’t get a good morning message from her. I felt empty, but out of habit sent her a ‘good morning dear’ and got a reply instantaneously as ‘good morning’. As much as she missed the ‘dear’, I missed her dearly.

  In the following days our conversations reduced significantly. She was replying to all the messages that I sent, but there was no life in it. The reply was done for the sake of replying. I lost interest in texting, mailing and even calling her. The feeling was mutual. The end of any relation needs only one of them losing interest. I couldn’t continue with the namesake conversations any further and decided to put an end to it. I decided to confess to her.

  One fine evening, as I was returning from office, I texted her,

  “Bru, what are you doing?”

  “Nothing much, you?” came the instant reply. She definitely wasn’t avoiding me on the face.

  “I have to tell you something, not sure how you would take it”

  “Go ahead”

  “The very first time I saw you, I fell for you. I am not sure if you remember, but it was an inter school event at St. Joseph’s. You were clad in orange, you sat in front of me and you told me that I was being loud and I heard as I am being ’loved’. From that day, I was desperate to look for you everywhere, every day, but couldnt. And then I met you in aspire. Our very first talk about your school and the way you reacted is still etched in my memory“

  “Okay”

  “I could go on and on Bru. Honestly, you were the only girl on whom I have had a crush. You were my first and only crush”

  “Oh?”

  “I wasn’t sure how you will take if I say it all. I wanted to marry you. Not sure if I could find a girl like you ever in my life. I know we are from different religions, our parents will not be for it and all that, but against all odds, I wanted to hold your hand in mine”

  “Rob, are you serious?”

  “Bru, don’t react like you didn’t have a clue of what I am talking about. I know you know it all well”

  “I don’t Rob”

  “Don’t lie. I know that you know it all and I also know that, you know that, I know that you know.”

  “Err What?”

  “Never mind. Not every guy is lucky enough to get his crush as his best friend, I was!! I still am. But, I really couldn’t take it when you kept talking about all your new alliances. It hurt me a lot”

  “Rob, what’s that gotta do with us?” she interrupted.

  “That is everything Bru. You don’t know how hurt I was. One side it’s our families, one side I wasn’t settled in life, one side our religion and then there you were with your over enthusiastic alliance messages. In fact I came to Bangalore to visit you, because I couldn’t handle you talking so much about Rakesh.”

  “And not for me? If this is what you felt, why didn’t you propose me?”

  “I was afraid of losing you”

  “How would I reject you, Rob?” she responded to my text..

  I read what she sent twice. She wouldn’t have rejected me. I should have known it all along.

  “I wasn’t sure. You meant a lot to me. I could never risk”

  “You mean a lot to me as well, Rob”.

  I called her immediately and she picked.

  “Bru… I had wanted to propose to you in person, with a large bouquet, kneeling in front of you, with a marriage ring and all that, but looks like we will have to do that some other day. Doesn’t matters, let me say now. I love you Bru, not like a friend, not like in any other relationship. I love you with all my heart, you are the girl for me and I want to marry you. I want to make love to you and want you to be the mother of my children.” I said.

  There was a pause at the other end.

  “Bru? You there?”

  “Yes Rob”

  “I just proposed you”

  “I heard”

  “Why are you silent then?”

  “I don’t think it will work out Rob”

  “What? Moments ago you told me that you wouldn’t reject me”

  “Yes, I would have definitely not rejected you, if only you had not acted weird, If only you had not asked me to stop messaging you for a day, if only you had not broken my heart that day, if only you had proposed earlier, if only.”

  “What are you saying?”

  “I am afraid now, Rob. I don’t think I can accept you now. I am not sure how you will behave after marriage. Honestly, I lost all feelings I had for you that day. You are just another passing cloud now. I wanted to know why you behaved that weird and now that I know of it, I am content. I am really sorry. But Rob, we can still be friends though”

  “Friends! I could never see you as a friend Bru. It’s really difficult for me”

  “Rob, I understand. But the choice is yours. Either we could be friends or you could lose me forever”

  “Bru!!”

  “Take your time, think well and respond.”

  “Before you cut the call, I want to know one thing. Just one thing”

  “Yes, tell me”

  “Didn’t you have any such feelings for me? Didn’t you love me, didn’t you want to marry me?”

  “I am not sure. I might have had. I might have not had. But it doesn’t matter now”

  “No, it matters to me, tell me now”

  “If you want me to be candid, well, it’s a no. I am sorry Rob”

  Her last words turned my world upside down.

  “You there Rob?”

  “Yes. Thanks. Bye” I said and cut the call.

  There was a flurry of messages from her, post the call asking for apology if she had hurt me. I was in no mood to respond. I disliked her and everything associated with her. I decided to stop practicing yoga. I decided to stop writing poems. I decided to stop texting her. It was all over.

  The next day in office I received a mail from her, containing the first poem I had written for her. I couldn’t help but smile. She was trying her best to console me. There was one part of my heart that said I should accept the truth as
it is and move on as she couldn’t be responsible for my imaginations, while there was another part which infused hate for her as she willingly created scenarios that would fuel my imaginations.

  I wasn’t able to come to terms with the harsh reality of life and the after effects of a break up. I replied to her mail with a smile and she responded.

  “Finally, you manage to smile”

  “Give me some time Bru.”

  “I understand. Take your time Rob and remember. I still need you

  as my friend. All my life”

  “Hmmm “I replied.

  Love, is the most harmful drug, it can make you forgive the

  cruelest of crimes. That night I practiced yoga for one hour to relax my mind and muscles. Pranayama gave me the required serenity and calmness. I felt better and also light at heart. I got a new vigor to face the tumultuous life ahead and accept realities as they were. I was ready to be just another friend of Brindha and I expressed the same to her over message. She reciprocated happily.

  Our conversations then dwindled down tremendously. We stopped with wishing each other on our birthdays and on special occasions. I moved on, she moved on, life moved on.

  After a few months, I got a message from her stating that someone (name not revealed owing to privacy issues) had proposed her and that after contemplating for a few days, she had accepted.

  “Great news, I’m very happy for you, all the best” I wished her with a fake smile.

  “Thanks Rob. Even I didn’t expect, it all happened too soon. It’s like a dream”

  It’s said, two lovers could never be in love with each other after a break up. If they do so, either they never really loved or they never really broke up. I wasn’t really sure in which category we fell in, then realized that, we were not actually in love. I convinced myself to feel happy for her.

  Against popular norm, Brindha started to text me more ever since she fell in love with that new guy - detailing about her new found love, asking for help, falling back on me for her needs. Though I didn’t enjoy it, I went along with the flow.

  “He gave me an awesome surprise today. He came to my flat at 12 midnight. We cut cake, ate it, he applied it all over my face and I ran around. He gifted me a watch. It was so sweet of him. Wait let me send you the photos” she spoke breathlessly, when I called her to wish on her birthday.