Right Click, Love

by Feeney, M. B.

  He explained that although they weren’t in an official committed relationship, the fact that she’d been considering other dates had still hurt him. The entire situation had caused him to have many an internal argument about whether he had the right to feel that way and if he should get in contact with her to try and straighten things out. He likened it to the Ross/Rachel ‘we were on a break’ storyline in Friends. Steve felt like Rachel, oddly enough.

  Then it was my turn. I told him all about my conversation with Lou last night. From his reaction, he hadn’t considered it the way Lou did, and I know she hadn’t thought about things from his perspective. I swear, I should have done this ages ago. They deserve to have their heads banged together. Anyway, I left him to think about what I had said. I’d been at Lou’s for about forty-five minutes when he rang her, asking if they could meet up. (Guess where they are now.)

  I believe my work here is done. I’m just unsure what is going to happen with the blog now.

  ~*~*~

  Jodie couldn’t wipe the smug smile off her face as she watched James cook for them. She also couldn’t stop looking at her phone every five minutes to check for messages from Louise.

  “Put that phone away before I confiscate it, Cupid.”

  She jumped at the sound of James’s voice. “But . . .”

  He crossed the room and took the phone out of her hand, switching it off and sliding it into his pocket. “No buts. Let them get on with it. Louise will call you tomorrow, of that I have no doubt.” He grinned and kissed her pouty lips.

  “I hate you.” Jodie grinned.

  “No you don’t.”

  No, she didn’t. In fact she . . . no, she wasn’t going to think about it. It was far too soon.

  Instead, she stuck her tongue out before sipping at the red wine in front of her, but it didn’t help. Those three little words were dancing on the tip of her tongue, teasing her. Jodie and James had known each other for a couple of months, which was nowhere near long enough to start entertaining those kinds of thoughts. She needed her phone so she could message Louise, but as she’d been cut off and Louise was with Steve, there was no chance of her friend helping her through the anxiety that was starting to grip her.

  “Are you okay?” James asked as he placed the food in front of her.

  “I’m fine. Just a little nervous for Lou.”

  He chuckled as he began to eat, not noticing how strained her smile was and that she was just pushing her food around her plate rather than eating it. She ate a few mouthfuls, but everything tasted like cardboard, so she gave up and pushed the plate away from her.

  “Are you sure nothing’s wrong?” James put his own cutlery down and took her hands in his, worry etched across every inch of his face.

  “I think I’m getting a migraine. I’m going to jump in a cab and go home to lie down. I’m sorry. I’ve ruined dinner after you spent so much time cooking.”

  “You’ve ruined nothing. Let me drive you . . . it’ll be faster and cheaper.” He helped her into her coat and led her outside to his car.

  After he’d almost carried her inside, he waited in the living room while she got changed into some fresh pyjamas before helping her into bed. He placed a glass of water and a couple of Paracetamol on the bedside table.

  “Sleep it off. I’ll call you in the morning.” He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead as he placed her phone next to the glass.

  Jodie watched James walk out and felt horrible for misleading him the way she had, but it was the only way she could get a bit of time to herself so she could try to think things through. She sipped from the glass of water before grabbing her phone, switching it on, and sending a frantic text to Louise: I’m fucked.

  Chapter Thirteen: What to Expect When You’re Not Expecting . . .

  Louise watched as Steve moved around his kitchen with confidence. Now that they were back on speaking terms and more, she could cope with him walking around topless as she watched the muscles shifting under his pale skin.

  She’d debated calling in sick to work to allow them uninterrupted time to talk, but she couldn’t. She had two new members of staff to train, and her Assistant Manager was due to go on maternity leave. So she had to travel a little further to Steve’s flat, where he worked from home doing something with IT support. All she knew was that he had a state-of-the-art computer system set up in the spare room.

  Thanks to Jodie’s intervention, they had spoken for hours that first afternoon, long into the evening, and had managed to get things straight between them. Once they got past their ‘misunderstanding,’ they were able to start their relationship from a new beginning with no expectations borne from chance or contrived meetings.

  ~*~

  Jodie didn’t want to, but she felt herself pulling back from James after her epiphany had scared the living daylights out of her. It was lucky, for her at least, that he was busy for a couple of days with meetings and deadlines at work, so she wasn’t going to be seeing much of him. She was able to fret without having to explain why she paced, chewed her thumbnail, and stressed herself out in general as she thought about things too much.

  What she needed was her best friend, a few bottles of wine, and a take-away. Hoping Louise didn’t already have plans with Steve, Jodie sent her a text. The response of “Your place or mine” made her smile in relief.

  “So, what’s wrong?” Louise handed Jodie a carrier bag of steaming curry to plate up. “What with the text last night and then asking for tonight, I know something is giving you the wobbles. Has James fucked you over? If he has—”

  Jodie cut her off. “No, he’s done nothing. This one is all on me.”

  They made themselves comfortable at the small kitchen table with their food and large glasses of chilled wine.

  Louise could almost hear the gears turning in Jodie’s head as she tried to work out how to word what was on her mind. She just waited, eating her food and knowing that if she pushed, she’d only make Jodie more liable to clam up.

  “I think I’m in love with James,” Jodie blurted out without warning, causing Louise’s hand that held her fork to hover inches away from her open mouth. “And it scares the ever-loving shit out of me.” After her blunt announcement, Jodie chewed the inside of her cheek while she watched her friend put her fork down, top up both their glasses, take a large mouthful of wine, and look up at her.

  “You dippy cow. I thought something was wrong for a minute there.” Louise was relieved it wasn’t something serious she couldn’t help Jodie work through, not that she wouldn’t have given it a go, even if it had been.

  “This is serious. It's way too soon for me to be thinking this way.” Jodie narrowed her eyes at the bark of laughter that was Louise’s answer. “It’s not funny, Lou.”

  “It kind of is.” Louise held up her hand to stave off the barrage of complaints. “Let me finish before you start. Answer me a few questions, then we’ll talk about timing and all that.”

  “Okay.”

  “Does James make you feel safe?”

  “Yes.”

  “Does he make you laugh?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Does he listen to what you have to say?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you miss him when he’s not around?”

  “Of course.”

  “Now, this one is the most important. In bed, is it all about him?”

  Jodie stared at her.

  “I’m serious. Does he just care about his own orgasm, or is it about both of you?”

  “I can’t believe you.”

  “Just answer the damn question.”

  Jodie took a large gulp of wine. “He makes sure both of us . . . er . . . get something out of it.”

  “Well, seeing as you answered all of those questions in the positive, I would think that it’s not too soon for you to be feeling that way about him.”

  “But we’ve been together for just a few months.”

  “So? There’s no timeframe set out in stone whe
n it comes to love. If you feel like this, go with it. Don’t pull back just because you’re afraid. I know you; you’re not the type to get devoted just because a member of the opposite sex shows you a bit of attention.”

  “I . . . just . . . it’s . . . Oh, I have no idea.”

  Louise watched Jodie start to pace around the kitchen trying to gather her thoughts.

  ~*~*~

  16 October 2012- What to Expect When You’re Not Expecting. . .

  I don’t know about you, but when I started serious dating a couple of years ago (before then it had been just casual with the added bonus of getting a shag now and then), I never knew what I was looking for. Was I looking for the next big romance, or was I just looking for more dates? I mean, we date to find a partner, but do we want them to be a life partner or just temporary?

  When Paul stood me up, I walked into the pub to have a drink and kill a bit of time, not to meet anyone. I just struck it lucky with James. Even then, after all the “experience” I’ve had, I didn’t expect anything to come from a few hours of flirting and chatting. Yet three months later, we’re still spending time together and still enjoying that time.

  The magazines all say that the way to find love is to stop looking. I’d always dismissed that as ridiculous and just a backward way to get women like me and Lou to buy more magazines for more advice. I mean, how are you going to find someone to be with if you’re not looking?

  Men are a little bit like dogs, it would seem, and they can smell desperation. Not a great analogy, I know, but I can say in all honesty that I met James when I wasn’t looking. He kind of snuck up on me and wormed his way in. In a good way, of course.

  So the magazines do know what they’re on about. By all means, go out on dates and try events like speed dating, but go for the fun and enjoyment. If you look like you’re having a good time, you give off an air of confidence, and guys are more liable to approach you. Who knows, you might find your James.

  ~*~*~

  Jodie felt a bit stupid as she pressed publish on the post; she’d never written anything so soppy. She blamed Louise for getting her to learn to accept the feelings she had for James. All she had to do now was tell him.

  Chapter Fourteen:Honesty is the Best Policy

  Jodie hadn’t told anyone other than family and friends that she loved them for such a long time that she wasn’t sure how to gauge when the time was right. Should she say it just after sex? Or would that seem too ‘caught in the moment?’ Should she say it when he arrived at her flat after a trip to wherever for work? It was driving her insane not being able to just say it without having to try and work it into the conversation.

  In the end, she decided that she would cook a big meal for James’s birthday.

  Louise was under orders to bring Steve to join them and ensure the atmosphere was light and fun. Then, they could bugger off home, and Jodie could spill her guts. Yeah, that was going to work to perfection.

  ~*~

  “You don’t need to go to all this trouble,” James told her as Jodie checked on the vegetables bubbling away on the stove.

  “I know I don’t, but I want to. Now, you have twenty minutes until Lou and Steve get here, so go and make yourself look pretty.” She placed a gentle kiss on the end of his nose and shooed him out of the kitchen.

  “I could get used to this bossy side of yours . . .”

  She swatted his backside with a metal spoon. “Bugger off and go get changed.” She watched his retreating form before checking on the leg of lamb in the oven. Satisfied that everything was going well, she opened a couple of bottles of red wine to allow them to breathe. Just as she finished setting the table that had been dragged into the living room, she heard the door being shut as Louise and Steve let them in.

  ~*~

  “Thank you very much for the gift,” James thanked Louise and Steve yet again as they got ready to leave.

  “It was nothing. Enjoy the rest of your night.” Louise winked at them while Steve helped her put her coat on.

  “We will.” Jodie kissed her friend, and the men shook hands and made arrangements to meet up for drinks.

  At long last, Jodie was alone with the man she loved and was feeling a bit timid.

  “Thank you for a wonderful birthday dinner.” James gathered her into his arms and peppered her face with wine-scented kisses.

  “It was fun. I could get used to playing ‘Hostess with the mostest.’” Jodie could feel the effects of the alcohol easing her nerves. “I have another gift for you. I wanted to wait until we were alone before I gave it to you.” She led him into the bedroom and made him sit on the end of the bed.

  “Is it something that comes in black and slinky?” he asked, a wide grin on his face.

  “Not this time, Romeo. It’s not much, but I hope you like it.” She handed him a small box with trembling hands. She remained standing while he opened it to find a key nestled in shredded tissue paper. He looked up at her, his eyes bright.

  “Is this . . .?” He stood up.

  “If you want it.” Jodie watched him as he attached her spare key to his own key ring.

  “I do. Thank you.”

  “No, thank you.” This was it — this was her moment.

  “Er . . . why are you thanking me?”

  “For talking to me that night in the pub.” She sat down before her shaking legs could give out on her. “It was a surprise after being stood up, but it has turned into the best thing to have happened to me in a long time.”

  “How could I not talk to you? You’re gorgeous.” Before Jodie could say any more, he claimed her mouth with his. After a while, she had to break the kiss to catch her breath. With her chest heaving, she went in for the kill.

  “James, I need you to know . . . I love you.”

  ~*~*~

  30 October 2012– Honesty is the Best Policy

  Well, she did it. She told him how she felt without throwing up over his shoes or anything like that. I’m so proud of her. When Jodie has her heart set on something, nothing and no one can talk her out of it, so when she decided to throw the dinner party for James’s birthday, I went along with her. The fact that she’s a brilliant cook had nothing to do with it. I just wanted to help her create the right ambience so she could tell James how she felt about him.

  I watched him throughout the evening to try and get a handle on how he would react to the news. All I saw was a man who was smitten with the woman in his life. In fact, I got the feeling that he already loved her. He couldn’t take his eyes off her; even when he chatted to Steve, he still kept glancing at her. All I can say is that she deserves every moment of happiness that James brings into her life.

  Now, enough about those two, before I start getting cavities from the adorability of their relationship. What is it about unavailable women that attracts men like flies to sh . . . well, you know. Is there a pheromone we release or something that utter arseholes can detect? I’ve been in an ‘official’ relationship with Steve for about two weeks. In that time, I have been chatted up by an obscene amount of men, after having spent six months or longer playing the dating game and getting nothing. Unless Jodie and I went somewhere like the speed dating event, nothing. As soon as Steve and I got together . . . BAM!

  I’ve even been contacted out of the blue by guys I dated ages ago. Yeah, like that’s ever going to happen. It’s the best feeling being able to tell a letch that I am unavailable. It’s even better when, as I say that, Steve turns up and wraps me in his arms. Cue a smug grin from me.

  All in all, life is feeling pretty good right now. Jodie and I need to discuss what to do with the blog, since we’re unsure how much those of you who are still looking will want to hear about how disgustingly happy we are. We’ll talk it over and let you guys know what’s going to happen, but I just want to thank each and every one of you for reading, commenting, and keeping us going. You are all amazing and deserve to find your own Mister (or Miss) Perfect.

  ~*~*~

  Chapter 15: It
’s Not Goodbye — It’s See You Later

  ~*~*~

  17 November 2012- It’s Not Goodbye — It’s See You Later

  First, I want to apologise for the lack of posts for the last few weeks. Louise and I have been trying to decide what to do with the blog. We were going to just delete it, but after receiving an email from a reader, Steve suggested we pass it on to two readers who are still active in the dating scene.

  The email was from Shirley, and she has just met the man of her dreams.

  She’s been reading the blog for a while but was always too scared to comment. When we posted about going speed dating, she decided to give it a go. She coerced a good friend into going with her, and it was an unmitigated disaster (her words, not mine).

  She and her (male) friend ended the night having dinner together, which was nothing new for them. They’ve been friends for almost twenty years. Anyway, to cut a long story short (and also not to give out too many details about Shirley), the speed dating had made these friends realise the feelings they had for each other . . . feelings they had been ignoring for years.

  This was three or four months ago. Last week, he proposed, and they are having a spring wedding. And the best bit? She’s invited Louise and me to join them to thank us for playing a part in their happiness.

  *Note to self: buy a new hat*

  So what we want our wonderful readers to do is this. If you feel you can continue on with the blog, email us here and explain why you and your friend should be the ones to carry on with it. Think of it as a written audition. The closing date for applications is 1 December 2012, and we will announce the chosen pair on 5 December 2012.

  We feel that this is the fairest way that we can pass on what James jokingly calls our “legacy.” I hope you all agree.