by M. Sembera
Pulling me to his chest as he tried to wipe my tears away, Jacks whispered, "It was just a nightmare."
Shaking my head into his chest, I cried, "It happened."
"What happened?" he softly asked.
"All of it," I whispered, finding it hard to recover.
Tightening his hold around me as I curled my body into his, Jackson offered, "I think it's better if Amila finds another way to help Charlotte. I don't want to see you like this."
Frustrated, I couldn't understand why he kept bringing her up.
How could Jackson think, with everything I had been through, some disobedient girl would have any kind of affect on me? Yea she had made me angry and I hated her but she had nothing to do with me, except for causing me to hurt a dear friend.
Slowly pulling away, I snapped, "Don't compare me to her."
Jacks looked at me with a pitiful expression, saying, "I just think she reminds you of things that you've left behind you."
"What if I didn't?" I questioned.
Pulling me back to his chest, Jacks replied, "Ren, nothing can come back unless you let it."
Relaxing against him, I knew he was right. Amila's talk about sharing and steps was wrong. I wasn't going to let Henley taint my relationship with my daughter. I wasn't going to let him destroy the happiness I had with Jackson. And I sure as hell wasn't going to let him pull the past back into my present. Henley was a problem I created and I was going to handle it.
14
Reaching Out
In my mind the best course of action was to call Hert. He was Sophia's dad. He knew everything and would want to protect her just like I did. The moment Jackson stepped into the shower, I grabbed the phone and stepped out onto my back porch. Without a lot of time to explain, I hoped the time zone difference didn't effect my getting ahold of him.
Anxious, I was relieved when he picked up after only two rings.
"Hert, we have a problem," I jumped right in.
I heard a woman's voice in the background, asking, "Where are you going?" before I heard Hert reply, "I have to take this."
There was a slight rustling noise as she whined, "Hurry back."
The sound Hert made in response to her, turned my stomach as I snapped, "Do you want me to call you back when you're not busy."
It took a few minutes before Hert questioned, "What's wrong?"
"Henley's back in town, I ran into him while we were away and he followed me back here. He knows about Sophia," I informed.
Hert's tone changed as he asked, "When you were on your honeymoon with Jackson?"
I felt uncomfortable as I replied, "Yes."
"What do you want me to do about it?" he asked.
Realizing, I didn't know the answer to that, all I could say was, "Help me."
"Why should I?" he griped.
Confused, I assumed he would care more about the situation.
"Hert," I fussed.
"What? I asked you to come back with me and instead you married Jackson," he shared.
"From the sound of it, you're doing just fine," I argued.
Hert's voice was harsh as he questioned, "What's your last name?"
Furious with him, I replied, "What does that have to do with our daughter?"
"Sophia is a grown woman. I have fulfilled my obligation to the both of you," he answered.
"So that's it, after everything I did for you, you're not going to help me?" I asked, just to clarify he was the biggest ass in the entire world.
"It was your decision to hand everything over to me. I still appreciate it as much as I did that night but that was business and this is personal."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I questioned.
With a cool tone Hert replied, "Personally, Mrs. Thomas, this is your problem not mine."
Gritting my teeth with nothing else to say to him, I hung up.
Standing outside on my back porch, I couldn't believe I ever loved Hert. Wondering if I had any options or if I was just going to have to sit back and watch my life fall apart before my eyes, I heard my sliding glass door open.
With a curious expression, Jackson stepped outside, asking, "What are you doing out here?"
Glancing down at the phone in my hand, I lied, "I was thinking about calling Amila and apologizing for what I said yesterday."
Softening his expression, he said, "Maybe you should give it a day."
"I really upset her, you didn't see the way she looked at me," I shared.
Walking closer, Jacks reached out and took the phone from me, saying, "She knew talking to Charlotte would be hard on you."
Giving him a bad look, I said, "I didn't actually talk to Charlotte, except for telling her off."
"Okay Ren, what I'm really saying is, last night was bad enough and I can't see you like that all over again so please give it a day," he confessed.
I stood there for a moment before agreeing, "Yes, I'm sorry I scared you last night. I think I'm going to take a personal day and I'll make sure it doesn't happen again."
With a heavy sigh he said, "Way to make me feel like unsympathetic ass."
Shaking my head, I assured, "I don't think that. I meant, I know you have seen me fall apart enough times. Like you said, we are just going to keep moving forward."
Satisfied with my answer, Jacks pulled me in for a good morning kiss.
~
Parked across the street from M.R. Industries, I debated on whether or not to get Ignacio Buceieri involved. He and his brother, Fiore, helped me. Once upon a time, back when I was fighting for control of my life, before he and his brother were vice president and second assistive, Ignacio and Fiore were freelance special service contractors. There was no way I could have accomplished what I did without them in my corner.
Finally deciding, I had no choice, I got out of my car. As I made my way to the building, I saw a tall man in a suit walk out of the front door. Smiling to myself as he lit a cigarette, I picked up my pace to catch up with him before he disappeared behind the building.
"That's a nasty habit," I teased, walking up behind him.
Quickly turning around, Ignacio took a long drag off of his cigarette before saying, "I disagree."
I had to smile recalling the memory of the smell of smoke on his suit jacket and the feeling of comfort I felt when he carried me out of the old office building after my run in with Henry.
"It's good to see you," I shared.
With a nod he replied, "What can I help you with?"
Looking him over, I couldn't help thinking of the tattoos, I knew were under his suit and tie. He appeared the same as he always had. Serious in expression and sturdy in his disposition with dark hair and eyes, he was as dago as they come.
"Unfortunately, there is something," I admitted before saying, "Henley is back in town and that presents a problem for me."
With a slight scowl, Ignacio stated, "I am aware and I apologize, I have been advised to keep my distance from the situation."
Nodding, I thought 'Hert is such a vindictive ass' before saying, "I understand."
As I turned to walk away Ignacio said, "If it is any consolation, my brother is also unhappy concerning Mr. Herterand's decision."
"Yea, I'm sure he is," I agreed before saying, "Thank you for your time."
Walking away, I shook my head, realizing there was nothing I could do to prevent everything from going to hell.
I started to open my car door when I felt a hand on my shoulder. The smell of smoke wafted in the air as I took a deep breath and turned around.
"I cannot get involved. However, Henley does not know that. I will share that we are aware he is here and keep an eye out. Perhaps, he will keep his distance."
"Thank you."
With a nod, Ignacio stated, "Have a nice day," before turning and walking across the street.
~
Sophia and Ailin were returning from their honeymoon next week and I was still worried but knowing Ignacio was sort of involved, made my concern bea
rable. As I lit the candles on my kitchen table, I felt better. I was in a good mood, Jackson would be happy and Henley just might decide tormenting me wasn't worth it if he thought Fiore was after him.
When my front door opened, I stood next to my kitchen table, in the candle light, wearing my black heels, the Wren necklace that Jackson gave me and nothing else. Jackson made the corner and stopped. I gave a soft smile as I watched him bend down and place everything he was carrying in his hands on the floor.
"How was your day?" I asked.
Standing up and stepping towards me, Jackson replied, "Better now."
I sighed before asking, "Did something happen?"
Shaking his head as he pulled me against him, Jacks whispered, "Good lord woman, I'm never gonna get used to you."
His kiss trailed down my neck while his hands moved to my hips.
"I didn't cook dinner," I shared, unfolding his tie.
With a slight laugh, he replied, "I'll take you out."
Nodding, I grabbed the ends of his tie, saying, "We should shower first," pulling him towards the bathroom.
~
Wrapped in a towel standing in my closet, I flipped through clothes looking for my light blue blouse.
Jackson walked in, carrying his clothes asking, "Did you go somewhere today?"
Without turning to look at him, I replied, "Yea, I went to DPS to change my license over but I realized our marriage license was in your car not mine, so I came home."
"You didn't go anywhere else?" he questioned.
Pulling my blouse out of the closet, I turned towards him, lying, "Nope, why?"
Shaking his head and shrugging, he said, "Just asking."
Feeling guilty for lying, I changed the subject, asking, "Where do you wanna go?"
"I kinda want to stay in now?" he offered.
Smiling, I really did too as I replied, "That's fine."
"I wanted to talk about something," he said.
For some reason, the serious expression on his face suddenly made me nervous.
Wondering if I was caught, since I had just lied to him about what I did today, I thought of things I could tell him to reassure him, I wasn't doing anything wrong. The lying was definitely wrong but I just wanted to handle it without him having to worry. But if I was caught, I was caught and I would fess up to the truth.
Holding my breath as I waited for him to speak, I sat down on the corner of the bed.
Jackson sat down next to me, asking, "You know how you said there were things we should have discussed before we got married?" As I nodded he continued, saying, "I got caught up last night talking to Roberts about kids."
Giving him a strange look, I said, "Oh-kay."
With a shy smile Jackson asked, "Well, what do you think about 'em?"
"I think they're alright...I have one you know," I replied.
Jackson took a breath before saying, "I don't." Unsure what expression was on my face, I assumed it was unpleasant when he quickly said, "I love Sophia like she was mine and I'm her godfather, she's family..."
Placing my hand over his, I assured, "I know that Jacks, I just didn't think, I mean we would be like sixty when our kid graduated if we had one now."
I could see how disappointed he was and I started to feel bad.
Shrugging, I offered, "But, we can talk about it if you want."
"I do want to," he replied.
Taking a deep breath, I shared, "I think it's only fair to warn you, I have some hormonal issues," stopping to pop him on the arm when he looked like he was going to laugh, I continued, "It's not a big deal but I was told it would be difficult to get pregnant."
"I thought you were taking the pill or something because you didn't say anything that first night," he said before asking, "So you're not on anything?"
Shaking my head, I answered, "No, up until then I wasn't with anyone and I guess, I really wasn't thinking about birth control."
Taking a moment to realize, it was careless of me not to think about that, I stood up and started to get dressed.
Jackson stopped me and turned me around to face him.
"Are we trying then?" he asked.
With everything that was going on at the moment, I wasn't sure what I was doing as I answered, "Seeing as we haven't done anything to prevent it, we can just see what happens," then trying to be smart about it, I added, "But only for a year."
Jackson had the sweetest look on his face as he said, "I wanna have a baby with you."
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I softly kissed him.
15
Acting Out
The days following Jackson's request to be a father passed slowly. Each time he mentioned what could be, the more I wished I had been completely honest with him. The harder I tried to push things to the back of my mind, the guiltier I felt. Without a word from Henley, since the night at the gas station, I assumed Ignacio's idea was working but the thought of him and what might happen still lingered. My self-reproach started to affect my daily life. Putting my mood off on Amila's refusal to answer my calls, made for a good excuse but did nothing to alleviate my conscience.
Tapping my phone as I debated on trying to get ahold of Amila, a stack of papers startled me as they were flung onto my desk.
Glancing up to see Marabeth, I asked, "What is this?"
"The four twenty three forms," she replied with an unpleasant expression across her face.
Narrowing my eyes at her, I questioned, "Why are they on my desk?"
After making a nasty face at me, she replied, "You don't have to do any work now that you're married to the boss?"
Clinching my teeth, I stated, "I will file them when you put them in the appropriate basket," pointing to the cart next to my desk.
Marabeth rolled her eyes and mumbled, "Stupid bitch," under her breath as she started to walk off.
Hopping up from my desk, I grabbed the stack of forms and threw them directly at her. Bouncing off of her side, they landed on the floor in front of my desk.
Quickly turning around, Marabeth glanced toward Jackson's office door as her whole disposition changed.
"I said I was sorry," she whined with a hurt expression on her face.
Before I could understand what brought on the change in her attitude, I heard Jackson say, "Ren, can I see you in my office."
Glaring at her, I saw the look of satisfaction on her face as I followed Jackson into his office.
Crossing my arms against my chest as Jackson sat behind his desk, I was furious.
"Ren, I know you're upset but..."
I quickly cut him off, "You're damn right I'm upset."
Leaning back in his chair, Jackson suggested, "I know you don't like her and Amila not taking your calls is bothering you but she is an employee here and you can't act like that."
Scowling at him, I snapped, "Excuse me?"
"During business hours you need to be professional," he replied.
Shaking my head at him, I asked, "Why are you defending her?"
Standing up, he explained, "I'm not defending her. I stepped out of my office and saw you throw the papers at her."
Nodding, I griped, "Oh and of course Marabeth did nothing wrong. I'm just the crazy lady that gets mad over nothing and starts throwing stuff."
Placing his hands on my shoulders he, looked down at me and questioned, "Okay then, what happened?"
"She put the four twenty three forms on my desk instead of in the cart where they are supposed to go and..." I started, stopping when he tilted his head to the side and smiled slightly like I was overreacting.
Quickly pulling away from him, I was insulted.
Taking a deep breath, I sarcastically stated, "You know what, I apologize Mr. Thomas. I will keep my emotions in check because God forbid, Marabeth have an unpleasant work environment."
Turning to leave his office, I heard Jackson say, "Ren," before I informed, "And I'm not picking them up," as I continued to my desk.
I sat down and pulled my chair up
to my desk. Jackson walked over and picked Marabeth's paperwork up off of the floor before placing it in the cart next to my desk.
~
After declining Jackson's invitation to have lunch with him, I sat in the nearly empty office, still fuming from the whole Marabeth paper situation. I tried calling Amila three times and each time my call went straight to voicemail. Disappointed, I started to get up from my desk when my phone rang.
Hoping it was Amila, I quickly spit out, "JPT Financial, Mr. Thomas is out of the office at the moment. How can I help you?"
Panic quickly replaced every other emotion as I heard a voice reply, "Mmm, good question."
"What do you want?" I breathed into the phone.
There was a pause before Henley replied, "You and I are going to talk, one way or another."
Clearing my throat as I got a handle on myself, I assured, "I have nothing to say to you."
"You are going to make me do this the hard way," he stated.
Searching my mind for something to say, I replied, "Just leave me alone," and hung up.
With a heavy sigh I closed my eyes, placing my hands over my face as I leaned against my desk.
Pulling my thoughts together, I looked up and saw Jackson and Marabeth, both smiling, as they walked in. Staring in disbelief, I watched them. Jackson walked past me into his office as Marabeth purposely made her way in front of my desk and shrugged a shoulder at me as she smiled. In lieu of slapping her to the ground, I stood and marched into Jackson's office.
Slamming the door behind myself, I questioned, "Did you go to lunch with Marabeth?"
Startled, Jackson answered, "No."
"Where did you go then?" I demanded.
Confused, he replied, "To the bar to check on things and sign off on some stuff."
"Did she go with you?" I asked, placing my hand on my hip.
Baffled, he asked, "Why would I take her anywhere?"
"I don't know but you sure as hell looked all cheery walking in together," I snapped.
Shaking his head, Jacks shared, "We happened to be coming in at the same time, I was just being polite because she opened the door for me."
"You are not allowed to be polite to her," I ordered before he fussed, "Ren, that's enough."
