Sin's Flower

by Carlene Love Flores

  The smell of Trissy’s strong coffee brought him back to their reunion and they sat at the breakfast bar whispering.

  “So how did you sleep? I know the big couch was full of Benny.” Her head shook and her eyelids fluttered like she was thinking of something absurd. “I should have listened when Lucky suggested adding on an extra room. But no, I shot that down.” Jaxon smiled at seeing her unchanged mannerisms and spunky attitude. “Oh oh oh, and did you see Maryella yet?”

  Her eagerness to chat about friends and family made him grin. Maybe this was his sign to test the waters. “Yeah, last night. Your sister was awake when I got in and she showed me where my baby girl was sleeping.”

  It took less than a second for her face to change. Whether she meant to hide it from him or not wouldn’t have mattered. He knew this look. This one was a combination of “Oh no you didn’t and Keep your hands off her, Jaxon.”

  “What?” he asked, cupping his mug with both hands and taking a burning hot sip. He’d be feeling that the rest of the day.

  “So you were up late with Lily last night?”

  Was this a test?

  “Well yeah, sort of.” Shit, he wasn’t gonna say anything to help his cause. “She’s uh, she’s great. Really sweet, nice girl.” That was a pretty PG description, suitable for big sisters. But boy, she was glaring.

  “And how would you know all that, exactly, Jaxon?”

  “Whoa, was that my belly that just growled? I’m so hungry. Maryellie said the French toast here is pretty good.” He just smiled and acted like he had no idea what she was talking about. And where in the hell was Lily? He didn’t dare chance a look in the direction of the bedrooms.

  * * * *

  “Squeeze it. Squeeze it. Squeeze it.” Her footsteps broke against the uphill trail in time to the beat as Lily remembered to breathe out on every fourth step. She exhaled and a puff of frozen breath tickled the tip of her numbed nose. “Feel the burn, chica,” she chanted aloud and then slapped a hand to each cheek. Damn that jiggle that vibrated beneath her palms.

  Oh, she was feeling it all right; may as well have been wearing concrete shoes. Her buns would be on fire when she finally made it back home.

  Home. Buns. Jaxon’s buh-huns, good gawd.

  Lily stepped up the pace to get back to her sister’s and the intimidatingly sexy man whose late-night arrival had motivated her to get outdoors on the coldest morning of the year. She could think of at least a half dozen dirty deeds and exactly how dirt cheap she’d do ‘em for if Trista didn’t have a houseful of guests right now.

  Oh wow, what was she saying? Had she sprouted her red hair again? Lily Elstone didn’t have those kinds of thoughts. Especially not over completely out of her league men. She knew a little about Jaxon’s type, having seen a picture of Maryella’s mom the little girl had tucked into one of her books as a bookmark. The woman was unbelievably gorgeous. Skimpy underwear model gorgeous. Plus, she was brunette, chocolate-eyed and could have been a granddaughter of Sophia Lauren. If Lily had a secret celebrity ancestor, it’d be more like Donna Douglas of Elly May Clampett fame. Yeah, you know, come to think of it, she could fantasize about Mr. Sex-comes-before-breathing all she wanted because there wasn’t a chance in hell he’d ever be serious about a girl like her. Sure, Jaxon had been nice enough at his house. That thought jacked up her pulse and forced her to step carefully to keep from losing balance. But then he’d thrown her out and the true trust she’d thought they somehow magically shared seemed foolworthy.

  The song in her ear buds changed. That voice that lost its Aussie accent when he sang chorus behind Stefan nearly melted her iPod. Tris would blow the house down if she ever found out Lily had already seen those buns in the flesh. “Feel the burn,” she chanted. She might not have a real chance with Jaxon, but the thought of being around him and his lethally hot bod at least had gotten her off her duff and away from all the Christmas cookies at home. She made sure to take the long way home, imagining with each squeeze of her glutes that she was feeding Jaxon bites of her scrumptious French toast. A reminder he wasn’t there to see her snapped to mind but only vaguely. Who in their right mind wouldn’t get carried away with the harmless little feeding food to a rock star fantasy? Especially when they knew it was the only way they could have him.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Jaxon, what are you doing here, mate? Do you really have to do this to her?

  Unfortunately, yes he did.

  The small bench in Grace’s granny flat where he’d been told to meet Lily could use some new padding. Ha, something Lucky hadn’t taken care of. That wasn’t fair and he knew it. But fuck if his simpleton cousin hadn’t turned out to be golden, all the things Jaxon just wasn’t.

  Thoughts of goodness and light stirred up his desire for Lily which had grown so strong he could taste the sunshine in the air when she was near.

  Across the room in the corner was a headless mannequin, dressed in yellow fabric.

  Lily was to surprise Maryellie by teaching her to sew, here at Grace’s flat. And he was to have brought his daughter with him now. But, he’d sent her off to the mall to see Santa with Benny. Testing his resolve against that of the soft fabric, Jaxon rubbed it between his finger and thumb, and he lost. Soft like he remembered Lily’s skin. He was so stupid.

  This flat was too small. Only two rooms, and too far back from the main house. Lily would be here in a few minutes, hurt when he told her what he’d done. Her anger would be welcome but he knew himself too well. Even if Lily was furious with him, it wouldn’t matter. He’d just wait it out and then make his move.

  The side door opened and she popped in, strawberry blonde and buxom under all her layers. Expressive and fragrant as a real lily.

  “Hi Jaxon, where’s Maryella? I spent all day looking but finally found a pattern just for kids. It’s so cool. You want in on the lesson?”

  “She’s not coming, Lily.”

  “Oh, okay. Well shoot. I guess my surprise will have to wait. We were gonna make a Christmas sack dress for the baby.”

  He had to think up something else to say. Something to push her back across the safe line. “Lily, I don’t know if it’s a good idea for the two of you to be getting so close.”

  She took an unnatural step back and shifted her jaw. “Whoa, where did that come from?”

  “Can you put yourself in her shoes for a second? She’s just a little girl and she’s never been around this much family. It’s been night and day attention showered on her and it’s not like that at our house. I don’t want her to get too used to it. You know, then we get home and there’s nothing. Just us.” Lame, he knew it. But he had to have some kind of legitimate reason for backing away from Lily. And some parts of what he’d said were true. It was gonna suck a giant’s balls to have to tear Maryellie away from all the love she was getting here. And yeah, he was gonna miss it a bit too, he supposed, but only for his daughter’s sake he told himself.

  Surprisingly, Lily looked remarkably calm and rational. The frown lines he’d initially caused had already smoothed out. Not good.

  “I get it. I do. But Jaxon, you can’t protect her from relationships. She’s lucky she doesn’t need it. Not here. These folks, her folks…they’re good people.”

  He couldn’t find anything to say.

  “You know, that goes for you too.” She let out a sexy, soft chuckle that worked to melt some of his weakening resolve. “Haven’t you felt welcome here?”

  Yes, he had. Against his will.

  Jaxon reached out for her hand, which loosened his rigid stance and allowed his hips to call out to hers. She smiled but chewed at her bottom lip. Honesty with Lily had been rewarding. She hadn’t flipped out like he’d expected. He’d try to remember that. Not thinking about much else besides wanting to feel her skin on his, he placed her hand at the side of his neck.

  “You’re warm,” she whispered and shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

  He just nodded. In his mind, he already knew h
er intimately. He was gonna have to talk to Trissy again. This whole keeping his hands to himself was not working out and they were only on day two.

  “Well, you’re here. I’m here. I’ve got all this fabric. What do you say? You up for a sewing lesson?”

  It was the least he could do to make up for sabotaging her time with Maryellie. But her invitation had him sweating on the inside so he shot off what he’d meant to be a joke. “Are you asking me on a date?”

  Her face flamed to cherry red in an instant, reminding him of her weekend at his house. God, that was such a turn on and such a dangerous reaction for her to have this close to him. Alone with him.

  “No. I...I just figured since we’re both here—” She snaked her hand away from his neck and was rubbing it against her sweatshirt. “Oh, you were just joking, weren’t you?”

  “Lily, call it a lesson, or a date. I’m looking forward to spending this time with you. What we make is up to you.”

  Oh shit, she looked like she was about to pass out on a pile of needles.

  * * * *

  “Okay,” she said shakily, feeling like she might just pass out.

  Jaxon left her but came back quickly from Grace’s kitchenette. “Here, drink some water.”

  “Oh, thanks.” Sure, she would happily blame this episode on dehydration. After emptying the glass, she thanked him again. “Much better.”

  “No problem. Staying hydrated is just as important in the winter as it is when it’s hot out. Plus you’ve been working out.”

  He’d noticed that? “Got it. Well, we should get started.”

  A half hour later and Jaxon still couldn’t thread the needle. She’d figured he was good with his hands but hadn’t factored in how much larger they were than hers. How would they ever move on to the actual pattern? The pieces they needed to trim for the facings for little baby arms and a chubby neck hole?

  “Lily, maybe I should just watch you work. I promise you’ll have my full attention.”

  “I have an even better idea. I’ll sew, you watch and learn, and we can talk.”

  “Mmm, okay,” he let out. So, where was he going? He moved to sit behind her so that she was sandwiched between his legs. Her shoulder blades felt hugged by his warm chest. Um, she was supposed to teach him to sew like this? Her breathing sky rocketed. “I like talking to you,” he said, nearly finishing her off.

  Well, she guessed she wouldn’t be bringing up last night’s dinner with his folks and how much she’d felt for him. Even though she was sure Luke and Bear hadn’t meant anything by it, Jaxon had sat there in silence while the men had shared every significant occasion he’d missed over the past two decades. They’d only meant to fill him in, make him feel like he’d been there for everything. Jaxon had exited visibly overwhelmed in a sweat-ringed shirt and had left a mostly uneaten plate to be cleared at clean up time.

  She dabbed the end of a long piece of red thread on her tongue to moisten it and then poked it through the eye of the needle. He watched her as he’d promised. He also cloaked her from behind with his massive expanse of shoulders and arms like her own personal heater. Clearly he was very interested in learning. She tried to remember to talk him through each step.

  “So then we line up the fabric pieces I’ve already cut and measured.”

  “Lily, do you remember the last time we talked?”

  “This morning? I think you managed a hello at breakfast before Tris’s door opened and she made her way out to the couch.”

  “That’s not talking. Remember that night on the beach? Hmm?”

  How could she forget? But they’d barely talked because he’d been under the spell of her foxy temptress hair, finding that spot on her neck so fascinating. “I remember. We determined we liked each other’s accents.”

  “And what else?’

  His voice was too deep. Too much.

  “We, we, we…”

  “I think I did this.”

  A zillion goose bumps raised their hands, prompting him to their exact location. It was her special spot he’d discovered that night.

  “Jaxon, what are we doing?”

  “You asked me that before and I still don’t have a good answer. Probably getting into lots of trouble. But I don’t want to stay away. Can you handle that?”

  Nothing would make her happier, she realized, than to explore things with Jaxon further, or as he called it, get into trouble. But one thing was glaringly obvious. She’d have to woman-up quickly. No more of this I can’t believe Jaxon James is speaking to me. “I think I just sewed the baby dress to your pant leg.” She didn’t say it was going to be easy. Just that she had to try.

  Because if she didn’t, it meant Tom had won.

  He took the needle from her hand and gave it a good yank until the red fabric she’d indeed stitched to his pant leg ripped free. “You’re like nothing I’ve ever seen before Lily.”

  “You’re nothing like him.”

  “Hmm? Like who baby?”

  Oh shoot. Oh shoot her dead right now with a double barrel. Why had she let that slip?

  * * * *

  That was a pretty big slip and he was surprised. Lily might have been a grown woman, but there was something so untouched by man about her. The way she’d said it, whoever the him was, she’d been hurt.

  He pulled away from her neck and looked at her pretty face. “Hey, you want to talk? I mean really talk?”

  His brave little flower crinkled up her brow and nodded her head from side to side. No, she didn’t want to talk about it.

  “Okay. No talking.”

  He’d never felt the urge to just hug someone before. No lust, no foreplay or teasing, waiting for the seduction to start. He just wanted to hold her.

  If his heart was really pounding as hard as he thought it was, she could hear it right now. Her face was nuzzled over his chest securely. She let him wrap his arms around her and rock her back and forth. Like a ghost hiding in the moonlight, his singing voice came out of hiding. He couldn’t hold back the hum because it was for her.

  Of course no matter how noble he felt right now, his lecherous body would betray that. He pulled her closer into the hug and realized how hard his dick had gotten. Chest to chest, he could have easily lifted her and set her down on top of him. As it was, if she wasn’t feeling him poking into her belly, she had kept extremely quiet about it.

  “Sorry about that. My dick, it just has a mind of its own most days.”

  He’d meant nothing by it, but Lily’s head flew up and popped his lower jaw closed.

  “Ow, I can’t believe I did that again,” she said.

  “You okay?” He rubbed the top of her strawberry blond head and planted a kiss in her messy part. His jaw knew the excruciating feeling of being smashed in so he ignored the tiny sting now.

  “I just, I’ve never said that word and it’s kind of embarrassing to hear you say it so willy nilly.”

  “What word? Sorry?”

  “No, the other one. Your male parts.”

  “My dick?”

  “Yes, that.” She brought her hand up to hide her face.

  “I’m sorry Lily, I didn’t mean to offend you.” It was just a word but something about the gaze of the unsure mouse sitting in his lap reminded him she wasn’t blatant like her sister and he didn’t want her to be. Talk about extremes. If he ever did manage to embarrass Trissy, she’d have told him to shove his dick up his ass. But this one here, she was still sporting her cute flushed cheeks. The question was, did she want to change that?

  “I’m such a nerd. Jaxon, please feel free to say whatever floats your boat. I didn’t mean to censor you. It’s just me.”

  It felt so good rubbing her back and having this quiet, intimate conversation. “Apology accepted.” He grinned, an ornery one he knew she couldn’t see. It was his way of easing her embarrassment. “Hey, so I guess this is a good time to warn you that I’m never trying to sound like a perv but sometimes shit just comes out of my mouth…See, like right there,
I just said shit when I could have probably used…”

  “Shush crazy. Talk like you. Be you. I’m really sorry and I shouldn’t have opened my mouth about it. If anything, I wish I could say whatever’s on my mind.”

  “Is there something you’d like to get off your chest now? Anything, free range, go for it.” How desperate could he be to get this young woman talking? Maybe he just needed something from her. A bit to hold onto and figure out whether there could be some happy middle ground they could reach between his craziness and her inhibitions.

  She’s not gonna say anything, dick. You freaked her out.

  “I miss the girl I was before. It would be nice to find her again. I think you would have liked her.” She gave him a sad wink.

  There was no question, he was sure he would have and also that had sounded like a plea. Taking a giant leap here and with her hand setting so close to his crotch, he had the perfect reason to go for it. “Baby, you taught me how to sew today, would you like some lessons in return?”

  They were now staring each other in the eyes and she was lit up like a string of twinkly lights. “So now you know how to sew, huh? I must be one heck of a teacher.”

  “Maybe I’m just a visual learner.”

  “Oh.” She blushed again and nearly knocked foreheads with him when her chin started to dip down. He caught and lifted it.

  “So are you interested in what I have to teach?”

  He watched her head bob up and down, thrilling him out of the uneasy parts of his visit so far. In his mind, he’d just voted her his table partner for any further family meals.

  “Okay, well for starters, are you good sitting here in my lap?”

  She swiveled her head around, then tested the ground beneath them with her hands but didn’t move. “Actually, yes. I am.”

  He winked. “Good. So am I. But I’m also highly aroused.”

  She looked like she didn’t believe him. Which was absurd. She let one “Yeah, right,” escape and then cleared her throat when he didn’t so much as blink. “Okay, you’re serious.”