Sin's Flower

by Carlene Love Flores

  “Merry Christmas Eve, mate.”

  Benny disappeared down the hall with a goofy peace out wave.

  “It’s just you and me, kid. Let’s start the movie.”

  With Maryellie safe, snug and deep into sleepies in the nursery, Jaxon couldn’t strip his eyes off Lily, sitting so intimately in his lap. The things he could do with her, knowing what a womanly body she had been blessed with, even if he’d yet to see it live. Tonight he wasn’t sleeping until he’d finally proven to her how desirable she was.

  That pent up desire was currently driving him insane.

  He’d fought his urges all day and night. Something about tonight and things happening beyond his control that put them in this house, together, made him feel like maybe she didn’t need protecting from him anymore. He was enough of a dreamer to believe maybe someone wanted them together.

  * * * *

  In her wildest dreams, she’d never have put herself with Jaxon James, here in the cozy living room of her long lost sister’s house, on Christmas Eve of all the magical nights.

  “I love this movie,” she said to her man, trying not to hyperventilate at the brand spanking new term. “Maybe I should turn around so we can actually see it.”

  Under a near pout, he agreed and laid down on his back with his legs stretched out down the couch’s length. “Plenty of room.” He patted his chest like a gentle caveman calling his woman to bed and gave her a tug.

  Her body melded over his while they lay there staring at each other stomach to stomach, Jaxon on his back, Lily with her eyes at his chin. “But the movie, don’t you think we should do the sideways spooning thing so you can see it without straining your neck?”

  “I’ll be fine,” he said.

  “Okee dokee.” She stretched her right arm to the coffee table and grabbed the remote then hit play.

  It wasn’t long before her apprehensions died down about laying there with Jaxon so intimately; she became lost in the sweetness the young man in the movie showed to his girlfriend. A half hour into it and they’d come to her favorite part. The young man, a wounded veteran who should be closed off to the world had seen the woman through an emotional breakdown. He held her so close which always did it for Lily. But when he looked at her, somehow it was just one of those perfect Hollywood looks where you could see just how badly he wanted to make love to her but how much more important her feelings were to him. He’d wait until she was ready. And then in return, his lady feels so safe that she makes the first moves and they end up in a passionate embrace which of course leads to their first time. All beautiful and lovey dovey and sexy and everything Lily loved about this movie. Her squirming and toe curling led to a loud sigh and then a few tears.

  * * * *

  Well, they wouldn’t be watching many of these romantic movies together. Her wiggling was just too damn distracting. With her so wrapped up in the dude on screen, Jaxon had decided to stay wrapped up in twirling Lily’s hair in his fingers until he felt a few tears drop from her eyes land on his forearm.

  “Don’t cry.”

  “I can’t help it.”

  He thumbed the ridge of her cheek bone, taking away the tears. “I thought this was one of your favorite movies.”

  “It is. That’s why it makes me cry. He’s so sweet with her when he could easily be a raging jerk. He’s been through so much but he keeps her away from that. And in the end she heals him.”

  “That’s a nice story, Lily.”

  “I know, it’s corny right?”

  “I didn’t say that.” He had no choice then. He hooked his hands under her armpits and brought her up until their faces were close enough to kiss. “It’s my favorite movie,” he said after surprising her with his tongue on hers. She tasted so good.

  “No it’s not. You’re so strange sometimes,” she said with a loose smile, her mouth still open from his kiss.

  “You like it, I like it.”

  “Jaxon? If there was something hurting you so deep like that on the inside, I hope you’d let me help you like she does for him.”

  He blinked a few slow times and felt his pulse slow the lower his heart sank with fear that she saw the darkness inside of him. It wasn’t a question of “if”. The problem was that he couldn’t see a “when” in the near future. He was trying to forget. Telling Lily what he’d almost done to her sister would only serve to destroy the two girls’ fledgling relationship. As much as he wanted to be free and healed like Lily described, he wouldn’t cause her that pain of knowing what had gone down with her sister. He wouldn’t steal what she’d regained with Trissy, and couldn’t imagine losing what they had miraculously built since meeting not so long ago. He was selfish in many ways, but he wouldn’t put his grief on Lily. He doubted she would cry heart stinging tears at a movie where the guy tells his girl about the time he was almost forced to rape her sister. That wasn’t romantic shit. It was fucked up and evil. And something he would take to his grave before burdening his Lily.

  She was staring at him. He gave her what he could. “If I’m ever hurting and you can help me, I promise to ask. Right now, I just want to finish watching you watch your movie.”

  She smiled and kissed him back then turned her head as the scene changed for the couple. He’d thought his chances of making love to Lily out on the couch were all but nil, with the sweetness she seemed to crave and his lack of it. The way he wanted to have sex with her was not nice. It was raw and wild. There were things he longed to ask her to do while he watched.

  As the movie played now, he pictured her in the privacy of his bedroom this way and that, every way and everywhere. When Lily cooed, Jaxon looked up and then over at the flat screen. The guy was standing on a ladder fixing something in the woman’s worn down house. Jaxon’s images became like stop signs warning him she might not like what he had to offer. Then the scene changed to the man and woman standing outside her fixer upper house later that night. He was expecting there would be a nice, long and tame kiss under the stars but the rain started falling and apparently all their inhibitions were washed away. Within seconds, they were up against the wall of her house and although the camera angles kept things PG-13, it was obvious the guy was inside her, making her pant.

  Lily’s nails dug into his forearm. Her one knee slid up his thigh. Her breath came out in short, hot hitches. Shit, she liked it. Maybe he could have his Lily how he wanted after all. Not here on the couch; he’d keep it tender and quiet since they’d be at the mercy of the open room. But once they went back to her room…mmm, he exhaled at the thought. Jaxon waited patiently for the movie to finish. It was difficult and he was hard.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  “I won’t hurt you. I promise,” he vowed, still aware of the care he had to take with her and how exposed she must feel being with him out on her sister’s couch. “Thank you for being out here with me. You’re brave, baby.” He nipped at her ear lobe. She shuddered.

  “Okay.”

  “Can we take some of these off?” He gestured toward her layers of clothes. “Can we? And then wrap up in the blankets?” It was a stretch but he had to feel her like he had to breathe. “I promise I won’t let anyone see you. Just me.”

  She nodded for him. “Yes.”

  His hands made fast work of the hoodie sweatshirt. A sense that she wasn’t going anywhere dawned on him and he slowed his stripping of her flannel shirt next which also calmed her heaving chest. He had to remember her tendency for getting light headed around him.

  Before he stole anymore of her clothes, a jolting need to be naked in front of her spun his head. With fever controlling his movements, he tugged his one and only top layer over his head and tossed it to the floor.

  “Hi,” she said when he moved so that he could lay down lengthwise and stretch his legs down the couch.

  “Hi,” he said back and tugged her to sit straddling him this time. It didn’t matter that they were both still in their pants, he could feel her woman’s heat coming off her core. It scorched his
belly underneath her. “Doing okay?” he asked.

  Searching the living room, she hadn’t looked down at him yet. “Hey,” he gave her shoulders a tug downward until she had no choice but to rest herself on his bare chest. “Benny’s in the back bedroom for the night. Trust me; he knows not to come out here. Maryellie is zonked out in her room until morning, dreaming of Santa and Rudy. It’s just us. Just you and me, baby. I want you here, now. But we can go to your room if you’re not okay with this.” Not having had the chance to practice many doting gestures with past partners, he delighted to cup her cheek with his hand until she let the weight of her full breasts fall onto his chest.

  “Let’s try this, here,” she let out quietly.

  He nudged her up after stroking her back for a few turns. “Baby, pull off your shirt for me please.”

  She began nodding that she was going to do so when she stopped with her hands stuck at the bottom hem. “Jaxon, what if you don’t like it?”

  “Not it, silly. You.” He padded her nose with his fingertip. “And that’s not possible. I promise you that.” The picture from her asshole ex he’d seen disgusted him but not for her lack of beauty. Before she went any further, he assured her with a slow, hot kiss. As he worked her mouth with his tongue, she lifted her top inch by inch until they had to part heads to slip it off.

  “See, you’re perfect.” Her breasts weren’t huge like he’d thought, picturing and growing them day by day in his imagination. But they were full enough to overflow the cups of her bra and his hands once he held her. With one glance up and down her hot body, he knew her size and what he’d be next day shipping to this address tomorrow. Sexy, properly fitting lingerie she would feel comfortable in and he would relish taking off. It would be her secret New Year’s Eve present from him. He’d be sure to include a few feminine styled tracky suits for her too since sweats seemed to be what she liked.

  She shook her head but smiled softly. “You’re the silly one.”

  In only minutes, he had her stripped down to just her bra and panties. All of his clothes were gone. He’d tossed them here and there but she’d piled them neatly by the couch in case he needed to dress quickly.

  “I want to taste you, baby.” The elastic clung to her skin so tightly it left marks in her wonderful hips. He leaned down and peeled the offending waistband back from her skin and kissed the marks.

  Before he could go any further, she reached down, grabbed her t-shirt and pulled it back on over her head. She then mugged him with a very sad and disappointed looking face. “I’m sorry but I just can’t be out here completely naked.”

  Carefully he raised himself up to look her in the eyes again. “If you’re not sure about this tonight, tell me now. I’ll let you go.” Not what he wanted to say but still, he should offer her one last escape.

  “Where would I go, half…mostly naked? What’s wrong? Now that you’ve seen me you don’t want me.”

  “No, no, no, no, no. That’s not what I meant. Of course I want you. But baby, I take a lot, and I don’t know if you’re ready for that.” If she stayed with him now, he prayed to be that slower, gentler man she obviously needed, just for this one night.

  “Jaxon, I want you to want me the same way you’ve wanted every other girl you’ve ever been with.” Her eyes shone true blue for him and he felt like he’d found home right there in her gaze. He bit his tongue to keep from licking her so hard he stole all taste from her neck.

  He couldn’t tell her that was impossible since he’d never cared about any other woman the way he cared for her. And also that his hesitation was due in part to the fact that the last time he’d had sex was nearly a year and a half ago. And never since he’d been forced to lie on top of Trissy.

  “I want you.” He paused for a kiss on the chin. “You deserve soft and slow.” He nipped at her lips after soft and after slow.

  “Will it bother you if I keep my shirt on?”

  He’d prefer she didn’t but knew that with it, she’d feel more comfortable with him. “As long as you don’t mind my hands sneaking up under it.”

  God, the beauty of a woman he could make blush with mere words.

  “Should I touch you? Will that help make up for it?”

  He didn’t know what it was going to do other than drive him crazy. “Mmm, can I make you a deal? Aside from your tee shirt, get the rest of the way naked for me baby. Then we’ll touch.”

  She stood, anxiousness wicking like a lit candle in her blue yes, and wiggled out of her lavender cotton panties. He counted one half of a breath before she hurriedly lay back down on top of him. He knew she’d moved like lightning to hide his view but her light brown curly hairs poking out from the shirt’s hem had driven him to ecstasy.

  “So where would you like my hands?” Her voice came out in a sexy whisper as she lay there wiggling her toes.

  Shit, here went his stab at honesty. Baby, please don’t think I’m a disgusting perverted fuck. Vangie’s detested voice chanted those words in his mind before he spit it out. “My dick, Lily.”

  Another “oh” nearly made it around her lips and then she bit it back. He was about to explode and her mouth making that round little cheerio shape was not helping. He fought to maintain control because as badly as he wanted to let go and be himself for her, he refused to hurt her.

  Her hand touched his thigh and then slid to where his balls hung, strained and heavy. Butterflies were things girls felt in their tummies, they shouldn’t be flitting around in his sack. Fuck, she felt so good touching him there.

  “Lily, where can I touch you, baby? Tell me.”

  She shook her head no. Shit, he thought he’d gotten her past that. He tried again. “Show me?” he asked.

  She nodded yes, saving him from his doubts. She left his balls and quickly found his hand but held onto it for a long minute. And then she placed his fingers to her mouth, kissed his palm, and scooted herself as close to him as was possible on the borrowed couch, making his arms have no choice but to wrap around her. She wanted a hug. God, how could he have used those vulgar words with her just now? Jaxon, you really are a dick, you asshole.

  “I’m sorry, Lily,” he said, crossing his arms over her bare back since he’d edged her shirt up to uncover her shoulder blades. She curled her shoulders inward and he tightened his embrace even more. “I should never have said that to you.”

  “Why are you sorry?”

  “Because I told you to touch my dick.”

  “But I liked touching you there and I don’t mind you saying what’s on your mind. You’re not being dirty with me. I know that.”

  “Um, baby, did you really just want a hug or…”

  “I wanted a hug to start out with, but now I want you to take over. If you don’t mind.”

  He did not mind. He just had to decide where to start.

  Her body was his home. It was time to own it.

  “Lay underneath me baby.” He lifted himself and she did.

  He knew how this had to go. Blanket up and over them, the heat from their breathing instantly created summertime moist warm air in the dead of a freezing Tennessee winter. His hands started out rounding back and forth, up and over from her hips to her fine ass and back. When he easily found the womanly bone of her hip jutting out, he wanted to scold her for thinking she had anything but the heaven sent body of a goddess. He squeezed in, applying pressure with his thumb into the skin and flesh right below that bone. He’d found a sensitive spot. She rolled her body from the shoulders down to where he was pressing in at her hip toward him like he’d found and brought her home from a night of stripping. Her short soft hairs brushed against his thigh so he brought it up and nuzzled it against her opening. She gifted him by rubbing herself further up his thigh and nearly up onto his hip. Fucking hot ass woman and her gifted pussy. He knew exactly where he had to go next. His mouth watered at the thought.

  * * * *

  Half of her felt like a cornered rabbit just waiting for the trigger to release and end her d
ays. The rest of her felt like she was already there, frolicking around and populating the bunny heavens. She hadn’t done much except for gawk and lay still so far. Back to the gawking part, that was her man? Really? Holy cannoli, his body could fire up the space shuttle’s engines.

  Of course she’d already known about his buns of desire but that had been a squelch of a fraction of how tantalizing Jaxon’s body was built from the front. He was currently squeezing her hip which sort of sent her to her horrified place worrying about the squishiness he was discovering. Except he glanced up at her for a second long enough that she could see something like pure admiration mixed in with an “I want to eat you” look.

  He squeezed harder, applying this crazy pressure just below where her hipbone jutted out and it felt so amazing she immediately downgraded her hip from gross to okay. She couldn’t help but rub herself over his thigh. She’d never felt a man’s leg hairs making contact with her sensitive lady parts and spent a little longer in that rhythm than she maybe should have. He wasn’t helping by flexing his thick leg muscle each time she rubbed. She was ready to go back to just gawking and laying still when he dipped his head to travel down south. And then he said something to her but she couldn’t hear it so she flapped some air into the blanket, holding it open by her end at the top.

  “Jaxon?”

  He wasn’t smiling but he was happy, that was for sure.

  “I was just reminding you to breathe, baby.” He gave her a wink and then a kissy face too. And he licked the air with his tongue. Was he trying to send her to her bunny grave? “Don’t pass out on me.”

  “What makes you think I would do that?” she asked in his direction.

  His answer was lips finding this spot on her thigh, his tongue probing it with more strength than she thought a tongue could have, and then nibbling teeth. Her answer was squirming and an accidental assault by her two knees coming together in a fiercely fast clap.

  “Ow, baby.”

  Sometimes a girl having her brand spanking new boyfriend go down on her for the first time will say the darndest things. “Jaxon, I haven’t showered yet today.”