Nurse in Recovery

by Dianne Drake

  Anna was so beautiful at that moment…

  Mitch moved to slide his hands under her belly for support, and she sucked in a sharp breath as he traced the outline of her flat belly, traced it professionally, of course, just to assess her stomach muscles. Right now there were some powerful hormonal parts of him fighting the professional parts, hormonal parts that wanted to do more than evaluate her muscle tone. And he sure wasn’t doing a good job of controlling them. Probably because he’d been way too long without a woman, he rationalized. But like Frank had said, he wasn’t a very good liar. Apparently not even to himself, since, along with the willful urges overtaking him, there were also some unsettling thoughts—thoughts about the two of them, their future—thoughts he tried forcing out of his head and replacing with images of Anna swimming the length of his pool garbed head to toe in workout jerseys. But, damn, the water was making them cling to her like one long, body-length wet T-shirt.

  “I’ve got you, Anna, so let go of the side,” Mitch said, his voice gruff.

  She did so without hesitation—not even opening her eyes until he’d guided her to the middle of the narrow pool. “Are you doing OK?” he asked, still struggling with the last image.

  “I’m fine.” She turned her face toward his chest to answer, brushing her cheek in his chest hair, causing a tingling sensation that shot through the water and his body like a jolt of electricity. “Mitch, do you think I could float by myself? I think I’m ready. Not really sure, but I think I can.”

  “Always trust your instincts, Anna. They won’t let you down.” He released her, glad to break that touch even if only for a fraction of a second. But he didn’t move away. Instead, he stayed planted firmly next to her body, watching as she maintained the face-down float. “Good,” he said, returning his hands to her belly when her body slid under the surface. “Think fish,” he urged. Or cold shower.

  “If I turn over and float on my back, I can think dead fish,” she teased.

  If you turn over and float on your back, I’m the dead fish. She’d see the look of hunger in his eyes. No hiding it, and it wasn’t hunger for the picnic food they’d be eating in a while. “Think fried chicken and potato salad when we get out of the pool,” he countered. Safe topic. “And chocolate brownies.” Safe…Yeah, right. Anna eating chocolate brownies…chocolate on her fingers…licking her fingers…

  “With chocolate frosting?”

  No way was he going anywhere near chocolate frosting!

  Anna fought the water valiantly for another ten minutes before calling it quits. Mitch was proud of her, and proud of himself for getting over that momentary lapse into fantasyland. Nothing like that had ever happened to him before, and there’d been plenty of beautiful lady patients—lots of transference, meaning lots of opportunity. But he wasn’t that kind of doctor. He valued his professional integrity, even though, with Anna, it was struggling to slip. So for ten minutes, while she fought the water, he fought the urges, and by the time she was ready to quit, he was…well, not over it. More like back in control.

  “I’ve had enough, Mitch. My skin’s beginning to look like a prune.”

  “Care to swim a few strokes before you quit?” he drawled lazily. Actually, he didn’t want to leave the pool yet. This was the first time he’d seen Anna completely carefree since he’d known her, and he wanted her to have that just a little while longer. She needed it, and he enjoyed watching it. Each time she succeeded, her confidence spiraled upward. Each time she looked to him for approval, her smile overflowed. There, for a little while in his pool, Anna was blissfully happy and fully alive, and he wasn’t ready to let it go.

  “Do you really think I could swim?” Her eyes bubbled with excitement. “Are you sure?”

  “Not the width of the pool yet…I hope, since I’m not ready to take off my trunks. But maybe a stroke or two for starters. It’ll be pretty tough going, though, so don’t go getting discouraged if it doesn’t happen today.”

  “Lanli said when you used to…that you’ve trained other people to swim. Can they swim the length of the pool?”

  “Many of them can.”

  “Without help? You didn’t have to be there with them?”

  “I was always there with them, just not in the pool.”

  “Did you bring them here? To this pool?” she asked timidly.

  “No. You’re the first.” And only. He’d never let his lives cross over before. There’d always been a separation because he couldn’t be both friend and physician. Where Anna fit, however…The certainty was beginning to unfold in him, even though he wasn’t inclined to concede it yet. “Let’s start by treading water.”

  Off and on for the next several minutes, Mitch and Anna worked alternately on floating and treading water, until she could do both without much assistance. He was never more than an arm’s length away, and the training finally intensified to the point his desires were completely pushed aside, forgotten. At last he and Anna were solely athletic trainer and athlete-in-training, the place he really needed to be for her…and for him.

  The freedom Anna felt in the pool was exhilarating, physically and emotionally. “This is great,” she sputtered, splashing water as a child would have. “I never thought I could do anything like this again.” She grabbed hold of him to steady herself, and for the first time became acutely aware of the feel of his almost naked wet body pressed against hers. It caused a strange tingling sensation, exhilaration, and she thought she felt it all the way down to her toes. Nothing about Mitch reminded her of Kyle. Kyle’s touch was always tentative, as if anything more would mess something up. Mitch’s touch was firm and assured. Something nice to consider, but something she wouldn’t…couldn’t…

  After a while, Anna felt the burn of exercising beyond her limits start in her shoulders and creep down to her fingertips. Never in her life had she worked so hard for so little, and felt so great. “I think I’m really through now, Mitch,” she finally admitted, a little sad she’d never got around to swimming. Treading water had been much more difficult than she’d anticipated, since all the work had to be done by her arms. Every minute she was immersed, her weight got heavier and her arms sorer. But she only quit when her arms started feeling like a couple of huge logs dangling from her shoulders. “What do you think?”

  “You did pretty well,” he muttered. “For a beginner.”

  “Yeah, right. Make sure you qualify that…for a beginner.” She splashed water at him playfully. “And pretty well. Not well or really well. Just pretty well.”

  “You did OK for your first time.” He splashed back.

  “OK? Would it tear you up to say something like Exceptional job, Anna?”

  “I’ll save exceptional for the first time you swim the width.”

  “And maybe I’ll save exceptional for when you swim that same width in the buff.” She laughed. “When can we do this again, ’cause I really want to collect on that wager.”

  “When you call and ask me. From now on it’s up to you. I’ll be there if you want me to, but it’s got to be your initiative, not mine. You want me out of my trunks, it’s up to you and how hard you work to make it happen.”

  “I want you to stay with me, Mitch.” She stared boldly at him. “I need you.” Like she’d never needed anybody else.

  He met her bold gaze in a gaze equally as bold, and a deeper meaning shone in the visual exchange between them. It was one of something far beyond her achievement, or her need for his help. It was primitive and timeless, a look known forever by lovers, and a look she’d never before known.

  “Of course I will,” he growled deeply. Pulling her into his arms, his words smothered on her lips, touching her like a whisper. So soft and gentle, like she might break.

  His kiss stunned Anna, but the feel of his lips against hers was a delicious sensation that elicited an eager and shocking response, one she hadn’t known was in her, one she’d never felt before. She quivered at his tenderness and the subdued passion he offered, at the way he held
her as if she were a precious porcelain doll to be cherished, one that might snap with anything more than he was giving. But, dear God, she wouldn’t snap, and she wanted it all. To prove it, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him to her so tight they were breathing the same breath.

  The touch of his tongue to hers, the feel of his probe in the recesses of her mouth, the feel of his body against hers—hard, demanding…Anna could feel his arousal, and hers. This can’t be happening to me, she thought. But it was. And it was Mitch. Right then, nothing else mattered.

  For several moments they exchanged a flurry of tiny kisses as delicate as the summer breeze that swirled about them, but then the urgency grew and the porcelain doll crumbled away as the kisses became slower, drugged with so much need and desire. Hot…penetrating…commanding…Anna pressed her open mouth even harder to his, opening her eyes briefly to see his beautiful face. But all she saw was a large, black object flying though the air, heading directly at them.

  Ralphie! she started to scream, but before the word was out the happy dog landed next to them in the water, splashing and ready to play.

  “I’m betting your dad is still out with my mom,” Mitch said, opening the door for Anna. It was still early, not quite five, and after they’d eaten, wandered through the woods and put in about ten minutes on the weights, Anna had simply dozed off, then slept for two hours.

  “I’m ready for an early night,” she said, pushing herself over the threshold. “Thanks for everything.” Including the kiss, which hadn’t been mentioned after it had happened. Ralphie had plunged into the middle of it and after that it had been business as usual. Disappointing, but understandable—one of those heat-of-the-moment deals, and when the moment had ended, the kiss had, too. Maybe even regretted—by Mitch anyway.

  She didn’t regret it, though. Even though it had probably been a pity kiss gone a little out of control.

  But what if it hadn’t been?

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  September

  “HOW are things going with Mitch?” Lanli asked, plopping down on the mat table beside Anna. She tossed a couple of one-pound ankle weights over to Anna.

  “Fine. We do weights in the morning, then three or four times a week he takes me out to his pool, and that’s about it. Same stuff pretty much every day. But it’s getting better. My endurance is up, I can tolerate more weight for longer periods of time. Nothing spectacular—just steady. In fact, I worked out in his pool yesterday, and I’m feeling it in my shoulders and arms today.” Anna grinned, rubbing her sore shoulder. “You think I’d be over that by now.”

  “Swimming yet?”

  “About two feet before I sink. And it’s getting pretty chilly to go in the water, so I’m not sure what we’re going to do.”

  “Therapy pool’s always open to you.”

  Anna grinned. “Not the same.”

  “Hmm…Something you’re not telling me?”

  Shaking her head, Anna thought about Mitch’s offer to skinny dip once she’d swum the width. Didn’t matter anyway. She wouldn’t swim far enough before the cold weather came to collect on it. “Not a thing, except that I’m ready for that pizza once we get out of here.” The Friday evening routine. Go to the hospital, work out with Lanli then go over to the pub with her and Sunny before Sunny went on shift. Maybe things weren’t exactly normal, but they were normalizing. “Extra cheese this week.”

  “You have put on a couple of pounds, haven’t you?” Lanli exclaimed.

  “And you’re looking fabulous, darling. Simply fabulous,” Sunny added. “Of course, I have some suspicions about that…”

  “Just keep them to yourself,” Anna retorted, fastening the first weight around her left ankle. Scooting back on the mat table, she lay down flat and began her leg lifts. The first one was always the easiest, but at two or three was when the real work began, when the still-flabby quadriceps kicked in and started complaining. But, hey, she was up to a couple of inches off the mat now, with ten seconds of sustaining power—the longest ten seconds in the history of the world. The first five seconds were OK, at seconds six and seven she was feeling the burn, at eight and nine the muscle tremors started and at ten her leg somehow took on an additional hundred pounds—at least, that was what it felt like. And one good leg lift took everything she had, but she didn’t quit. She went back for the second, then the third. Soon, she hoped, she’d be up to four.

  “Well, I’ll keep it to myself.” Sunny laughed, after Anna completed her first set of leg lifts and was switching her weight over to her right ankle. “But in case you’re interested, girls’ night out’s getting a guy this week. I asked Mitch when he was dropping Anna off at her house earlier. And he seemed mighty pleased about it.”

  “He likes pizza,” Anna said defensively, stretching back out on the mat, trying not to be distracted by anything, including Mitch. There was more conversation between Sunny and Lanli, but she didn’t listen to it, didn’t respond. These days, she didn’t listen to anyone or talk to anyone when she exercised. She zoned it all out—it was all about concentration, and she was getting pretty good at it. Sometimes she put on the headphones and listened to music; sometimes she simply listened to that voice in her head, the one that kept saying, You go, girl. And right now, You go, girl was about to get her to the fourth rep on her right leg, a milestone in her routine. Lift it, hold it…hold it…hold it…seven, eight…hold it…burning…burning…nine…you go, girl…ten!

  She held her breath for the ten count, and when it was over her lungs expelled the air in a huff. Then Anna simply lay there, resting, trying to catch her breath, listening to the noise of the conversation floating over her but not the words. Four repetitions, and she really wished Mitch had been there to see it. Somehow, telling him over pizza wouldn’t be the same.

  “Did I tell you Dad and Izzy are going away for a weekend?” Anna said, when her normal breath returned and the thrill of the moment was gone. “She’s got some cause up in Michigan—can’t remember what she’s protesting about this week—and Dad’s going with her. They’re together all the time now.”

  “Don’t tell me he’s carrying picket signs these days.” Sunny laughed.

  Anna grabbed a towel off the side of the mat table and wiped her face as she sat back up. “Nope, no protesting, but he sure likes cheering her on from the sidelines.”

  Lanli took Anna’s ankle weight and tossed it off to the side of the mat. “It’s good for him, and he deserves it. Have you given any thought about what happens if they…well, you know. If Mitch ends up your stepbrother?”

  “Then he ends up my stepbrother. So what?” One kiss two months ago, and that was it. And one kiss did not a relationship make. They’d been cordial, he’d been diligent and that was it. End of story. Except that her feelings toward him weren’t exactly sisterly, but she was doing a pretty good job of keeping them buried so deep no one would ever think to look for them…least of all Mitch.

  “Well, I thought something might be going on with you two by now,” Sunny chimed in. “Or, at least, it should be.”

  “Not a thing.”

  “Did you know he kissed her?” Sunny said to Lanli, plopping down on the mat table with the two of them. “Izzy told Frank, who told me. Apparently Mitch was real quiet for days so his mom finally asked him point-blank if anything was going on with Anna and he admitted they’d kissed. I think Frank and Izzy were both hoping for something more. I know I was.” Sunny shrugged. “You wouldn’t be lying to us about this, would you Anna?”

  “It was in July,” Anna muttered. “One kiss, one time. And I’m not lying about anything. There’s nothing going on.”

  Lanli sat down on the other side of Anna and took hold of her arm for range of motion exercises. “So that’s it? His mom, your dad, and nothing else to report about that July kiss?”

  “That’s it,” Anna replied, shutting her eyes. “He helped me float for the first time and then he kissed me—congratulatory kiss.” And I probably fell in love
. But that was nobody’s business. Her choice, and this time it would stick.

  “Well, I’ve seen Mitch work with hundreds of patients and I’ve never seen him give a congratulatory kiss before.” Lanli switched to Anna’s left arm. “I’m about ready to get you up on the parallel bars. Wanna give it a try tonight, before we get out of here?”

  “Since I intend on eating a whole pizza by myself, maybe I’d better give it a try now, before I gain another pound or two.” Anna scooted over to the edge of the mat, ready to transfer to her chair.

  “Need some help?” Sunny asked automatically.

  “Nope, not anymore.” And she didn’t. Her arms were much stronger now, making the transfer easy. What she’d once struggled with was now no more difficult than blinking her eyes. Anna looked at Lanli, “So, let’s do it.”

  Lanli smiled. “You’ve come a long way, Anna. Especially your attitude. Let me go grab a belt and we’ll see what we can do.”

  It was a pink webbed belt, one Lanli fastened around Anna’s waist to support her in case she fell or her legs wouldn’t hold her up. Once it was on, Anna wheeled herself to the parallel bars, looked up at them for a moment. One more obstacle to overcome. But this was the one that would get her walking again. The big one! “OK,” she said, a good case of the jitters starting in the pit of her stomach. This was where she’d find out the course for the rest of her life.

  “I’m not real sure about this,” she said, taking a deep breath. “Kicking around in the water is one thing, but supporting my weight…”

  With Sunny behind Anna to remove the wheelchair, and Lanli at Anna’s side to support her weight, Anna gritted her teeth, held her breath and pulled herself up. She felt Lanli’s support, not so much helping her into a standing position as keeping her there when she was. And slowly she began to rise.

  Such an effort…her butt felt like deadweight pulling her back to the chair. And she was so off balance…The room was tilting backwards. Even so, once Anna was substantially out of the chair, Sunny pulled it away so she couldn’t fall back into it. Nothing there but the cold, hard floor and Lanli, and she didn’t want to encounter either one.