A Different Shade of Violet?

by K E Osborn

  He’s still attracted to me!

  He leans down and takes my nipple into his mouth sucking on it hard as I run my hand through his hair savouring his touch. He kisses back up my collarbone and to my lips as he grinds his cock in between my legs, where my panties are soaking wet for him. I run my hands down his back and to his arse, clenching on his cheeks and forcing him into me more. I crave the contact with him, so I’m trying to get as much as I can. He grinds into me again and I wrap my legs around his arse giving him full access to grind into my throbbing clit. His tongue dances with mine as his hand comes down and massages my breast strongly, but not painfully.

  I moan in pleasure and he grinds into me again making me gasp as his lips leave mine. He kisses his way down my neck and to my right nipple where he sucks it again and then gently bites sending a shiver down my body straight to my throbbing clit. He kisses down my stomach and gets to my pants line. He kisses along the hem of my pajama pants and then takes hold. I’m breathing so heavily, I can’t wait for him to touch me. I’m soaking wet for him already and the chemistry surging through the air is off the charts hot. He leans down kissing my stomach and he pulls my pants and panties down slightly and then stops. I look down to see what he’s doing and he’s panting as he stares down at the top of my pussy and then he suddenly sits up taking his body from mine. He’s shaking his head and his eyes are scrunched so tight it must be hurting. I swallow the lump in my throat and pull my pants up fully and sit up in the bed next to him.

  “I’m sorry,” he says and I instantly know that our steamy session is over.

  “Why’d you stop?” I ask and he opens his eyes and looks at me like he’s hurting. His eyelids are drooped and he’s frowning.

  “Because I can’t get the images out of my head, Vee. I’m so sorry, but…” he trails off and I swallow hard as he runs his fingers through his hair.

  “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pounced on you. Especially after today, I just got caught up in the emotion of the nightmare. I’m sorry,” I whisper looking down at the bed. I exhale and shake my head at myself for just making things worse. Not to mention the rejection I feel, yet again.

  “Hey,” he says putting his finger under my chin and bringing my head up to look at him. I stare into his amazing, multi-coloured eyes and I swear I see love coming right back from them. I swallow the lump in my throat and he half-smiles.

  “I’m sorry too. I let that go too far. This is as much my fault as it is yours,” he says and I can’t seem to break myself from staring right into his eyes. The spark is still firing off between us, and I know he’s still thinking about sex because I can see the massive tent in his boxers.

  “Are you okay?” he asks and I nod slightly while he caresses my cheek as I start to button up my pajama top. “Just for the record – I didn’t want to stop. It’s just my brain overruling my heart,” he admits and I nod and take a deep breath. “Do you think you can go back to sleep?” I nod again. He smiles and kisses my forehead and stands up. “I’m going to go and have a shower. Will you be okay for a bit?” he asks and I start to feel a little frustrated.

  “I’m fine! Go, have your shower.”

  He nods and walks into the bathroom leaving me feeling like he needs to shower because he feels dirty, which only makes me want to run. I don’t care about my life. I know I’m living on borrowed time anyway. Ratting out bikers doesn’t end well, I know that, and Hudson clearly doesn’t want me.

  So what the hell is the point of sticking around here?

  I huff and lay back down on the bed when I hear a mobile ringing. I sit up and look toward the bathroom and then over to the coffee table where Hudson’s private phone is ringing. I think that I better see who it is, after all, it’s nearly two in the morning and it might be urgent. I get up and race over to the phone to see Cassie’s name flashing up on the screen. I immediately want to stop the call and delete her number, but the jealous girlfriend side of me kicks in and instead of hanging up the phone like I should, instead I swipe the face and answer the call.

  “Cassie,” I say quietly so Hudson can’t hear me.

  “Who is this? Where’s H?” she replies sounding concerned.

  “He’s in the shower, you know, cleaning up,” I say trying to make it sound like we’ve just had sex.

  “Is this Violet?” she asks and I grin mischievously.

  “The one and only. Thanks for calling I’ll be sure not to tell Hudson you called. He’ll be too busy with me to even notice anyway,” I lie.

  She laughs making me furrow my brows. “Dear sweet Violet, as much as I know you want me to think you and H slept together, I know for a fact that you haven’t. He can’t stand to even think of you in that way. It grosses him out! As it should,” she says with venom in her voice.

  “What the hell would you know? You don’t own him, and he will always want me Cassie. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at me—”

  “Sweetie, you see longing in his eyes. Yes, he might love you, but love isn’t enough when you’re completely grossed out by the person you love. He will never fuck you, Violet. You might be trying to tempt him into it, but I was there when you broke him, and I know for a fact he’ll never sleep with you again. You’re vulgar and filthy. Who knows how many thousands of men you have slept with, sucked off, had rub their cock in your face? You are nothing but a whore and that’s exactly how Hudson see’s you, now and always. You’re nothing to him, just a memory of a girl he used to love before he found out the truth. Why have a whore when you can have a real woman, huh?” she asks and my blood boils.

  “Fuck you Cassie, you don’t know me. Don’t you even pretend to! Yes, my past is jaded but sometimes love is enough, and I can assure you if he doesn’t end up with me, he sure as hell won’t go back to a weak, insignificant, vapid little bitch like you,” I say and hang up the phone with a grunt. I huff in frustration and throw the mobile hard into the sofa.

  “Stupid fucking slut,” I murmur and then go and sit on the edge of the bed as her words play on my mind. And even though I don’t want to believe it, I know she’s right. Any chance for me and Hudson ended when he walked into Cupiditas and found out what I am. So what’s the point? What the hell is the point of me being here? I’m dead anyway, and Hudson staying here with me is not going to change that fact. I know he loves me, but it really isn’t enough if you aren’t attracted anymore. That’s a real problem! And I know he might be attracted to me, but his visions of me with other men are too overpowering and it turns him off. I just witnessed it firsthand. So, even though I was arguing with Cassie out of spite, I know that she is one hundred percent correct and that Hudson and I are just never going to work.

  I make the decision to make it easier on everyone. If I just take myself out of the equation, Hudson can move on. Mad Dog can get his little fix and do whatever he wants to me and I can finally be at peace and see my husband and son again. This is the best and only solution. I stand up from the edge of the bed and look over to the bathroom to make sure Hudson is still in there. I listen and I can hear the water running so I quickly put on some shoes and a jacket over my pajamas and I head straight for the front door.

  I didn’t think giving up would be this easy, but I have nothing left to fight for. Hudson proved that when he stopped our steamy session. I open the front door and look back just to double check he isn’t coming. I step outside leaving the front door open. I wrap my arms around myself to try and keep warm. It’s freezing, but I don’t really care. I feel quite numb right now. I am walking to my own demise so I guess I could either be scared or just be at peace with it. I choose the latter. I start to walk toward the forest. I know there will be cops at the front entrance, so if I walk through the brush I should be able to avoid them. Even though the thought of spiders is not very appealing right now, but I’ll take my chances.

  I walk into the brush and start to pull the branches out of the way as I walk. It’s pitch black and I can hardly see, but my eyes are slowly adjusting to t
he darkness. I sniff as the more steps I take the further and further I distance myself from Hudson, not only in actual distance, but in my heart as well. I need to let him go because I know he’s slowly letting me go. The pain in my chest right now is making it hard to breathe. Knowing he doesn’t want me is harder to take than the thought of my own death, which I know will come by daylight, when the Dogs find me. I’m sure they’re looking and as soon as I can make my way to a street and hitch a ride, I’m going to go straight to the car park at work and I’ll sit and wait. Hopefully, I can get there before Hudson works out what I’m doing.

  I push past the thickening brush and I honestly have no idea if I’m going in the right direction, but I feel so empty that even the thought of dying out here in the forest is kind of appealing. Being one with nature doesn’t sound so bad.

  I move through the thick forest and I’m starting to shake from the cold. I wish I’d put some better clothing on rather than just a jacket over my PJ’s. But it is all I have, so I continue to walk. I push past a big tree and my jacket snags on a broken twig and I get caught. I huff and try to free myself from the tree’s grip, but it’s really stuck on there and I can’t see properly. I yank hard and it comes free so forcefully that I fall backward and land straight on my arse hitting my head on the tree truck behind me.

  “Ouch fuck!” I moan quietly. I rub the back of my head and stand back up with a huff. “Stupid fucking tree!” I moan and lean up and break the branch that snagged me. “Take that you twiggy bitch,” I say and throw the twig ahead of me. It makes cracking sounds as it hits the other trees ahead of me. I exhale and nod my head like I’ve done myself proud and then I continue to walk through the brush until I can see a faint light up ahead.

  I wonder briefly if Hudson has noticed that I have left yet? I’m pretty sure I’ve been out here for at least a quarter of an hour. He should know by now, but I haven’t heard anything. I keep walking toward the light, pushing twigs and leaves out of my way as I walk.

  I come to a small embankment and I realise up the top is the road. I let out a relieved sigh and start to climb up a small steep incline. The gravel under my shoes is making it a little hard to climb up, but with the help of some branches from a nearby tree I’m able to pull myself up to the road. A single street lamp lights the road ahead of me and I smile knowing I’ve reached it. I look down the road and can vaguely make out a car sitting at the edge of a driveway, but it’s so far off in the distance I know they won’t see me.

  I turn and walk on the side of the road away from the cop car and back toward town. The crunch of the dirt under my shoes sounds deafening in the deathly quiet of the early morning. It’s got to be close to 2:30 a.m. by now and there’s no noise except for the annoying persistence of the crickets chirping. I look over my shoulder as I glance toward the entrance of the cabin, I can’t even see it now as it’s too far away in the distance.

  I’m walking quite fast. I have no idea how long I’ve got before Hudson calls out a search party for me. I’m hoping a car will drive past before they find me. Each step I take, another piece of my heart shatters and then splinters and freezes over, making it so I don’t have to feel anymore.

  The Violet Widow is almost back!

  She was here for a while, but being with Hudson forced her to disappear and Violet the desperate and weak had returned. Well, The Violet Widow is definitely coming back with a vengeance now, and with each step the anger and resentment that she harbours is slowly seeping back in.

  The air is freezing and the wind’s picking up. A flash of lightning flickers across the night sky making me jump at the sudden show of electricity through the black clouds. I hadn’t noticed when I left the cabin, but the sky is dark and dreary and as I look up at the sky the thunder from the lightning bellows across the hills and I shudder at the thought that I’m heading toward a lightning storm. I glance up again and a raindrop falls straight on my forehead. I flinch from the impact and then wipe the water from my face.

  “Great,” I murmur as another drop hits, then another, followed by another flash of lightning.

  “For fuck’s sake,” I say as I pull the hood up from my jacket to cover my head as the rain suddenly starts to fall dramatically down to the dirt forming a muddy pathway for me to traverse. A loud clap of thunder roars above my head and I bring my arms up around my chest and huddle into myself trying to get some warmth in the now freezing cold, rainy winter’s morning.

  The rain is falling so heavily and I must admit, while the thought of Mad Dog and his cronies killing me doesn’t scare me, the thought of being struck by lightning doesn’t rate too highly on my ‘to do’ list. I pull the hood over my head a little more to stop the rain from hitting my face when I suddenly see two headlights approaching me.

  I smile. I actually smile!

  I walk closer to the road so they’ll see me but not close enough so they’ll run me down. As they get closer, I start to wave my arms around frantically trying to gain their attention. To be honest if they were any sort of sane person they wouldn’t pick up a hitchhiker in the middle of nowhere in the peak of darkness, that’s just asking to be murdered. So in a way I hope these are some hippies or something willing to pick up a cold and wet stranger on the side of the road.

  The car starts to slow down and I smile again.

  “Thank God,” I whisper and I run toward the car as it stops fully.

  The front passenger door opens and I rush to it, bending down I see two big burly men. One has tattoos all the way down his arm, and I find it weird that in the start of winter he’s wearing only a T-shirt. But I can feel the heat from the car’s heater flowing out of the car and across my face.

  “What are you doing out here in the freezing cold rain miss?” the driver asks leaning over the passenger who’s assessing me.

  “Went for a walk and got lost. Think you could give a girl a ride?”

  The passenger looks me up and down with a frown. “Are you in your pajamas? And what happened to your face? Your boyfriend beat you up or something?” he asks as the rain continues to pummel me.

  “Yes, and no,” I reply, choosing not to share more about that subject. “Can I get a ride or not?” I ask and the passenger looks at the driver and nods.

  “Okay, jump in.”

  I move to the back and open the door scurrying quickly into the warmth and dryness of their car. It’s a really nice car actually.

  “Thank you so much. Who knows how long I would’ve been stuck in the rain for if you hadn’t shown up,” I say while shutting the door.

  “No worries, miss. Just glad to help you find your way,” the driver says looking back at me and then to his shady passenger who’s nodding slightly. I have no idea what that’s about, but I choose to ignore it.

  “We just have to stop off at a mate’s place on our way back into town. You mind?” the passenger asks and I start to get a little nervous.

  “Sure,” I say and place my seat belt over my body.

  The driver starts to drive and I notice we’re heading back toward the cabin. I shuffle down in my seat so when we drive past they won’t see me. The tension in the car is palpable and I feel completely awkward.

  “So what are you guys doing out here in the middle of the night?” I ask as we approach the cabin. I sink down a little further.

  “Well, like I said we’re heading out to see a mate,” the passenger replies.

  I furrow my brows and purse my lips. “Bit late to be seeing someone isn’t it?”

  “Part of the job,” the driver says and I instantly tense up.

  “Job?” I ask hesitantly.

  Maybe Mad Dog’s guys knew where I was all along and now these guys are taking me to him.

  “You’ll see,” the passenger replies turning around to look at me. I hear a crack and a buzz like a radio is being turned on.

  “Eagle two to eagle one. Bird is in the nest. Over,” the passenger says into a CB radio that I hadn’t noticed was in the car.

  �
�Copy that eagle two. Eagle one and watch dog are sitting in wait. Over,” the deep male voice replies over the radio.

  “ETA, two minutes eagle one. Over,” the passenger says and I furrow my brows.

  What the fuck?

  “Received. Over and out,” the voice replies.

  My heart starts to race and my breathing quickens. Who the fuck is watch dog? Sounds like Mad Dog is waiting for me.

  “On second thought guys, it’s fine for you to let me out here. I remember where I am now and it’s not far from here,” I say.

  The passenger looks back at me and chuckles. “Little bird, you’re not going anywhere,” he says and I start to tense up. I swallow hard as I look around the car for something. It’s funny how when faced with your own mortality even if you thought you were fine with it, you really aren’t. I don’t know what else I can do other than to distract the driver and make him pull over. So I do the only thing I can think of.

  I scream loudly and they both turn back suddenly to look at me. I lean forward and punch the passenger in the side of his face.

  “Fuck,” the driver says as he swerves.

  “Get off me,” the passenger shouts while I continue to slap at him and scream like a complete crazy woman.

  “Duke, hurry the fuck up,” the passenger yells as I climb into the front and straddle him slapping him repeatedly in quick succession.

  “Fuck woman, are you crazy?” he yells as the driver keeps driving. He pulls a hard left forcing me to slam my head into the window.

  “Ouch,” I scream out as I stop slapping the man and rush my hand to my head to check if it’s bleeding. The passenger quickly grabs my hands and holds them tightly around my wrists. I struggle against him and scream in his face. His eyes are open wide like he can’t believe what’s happening to him. All I know is my tantrum isn’t working because we’re still driving, and now that I have my back to the windscreen I have no idea where we are.