A Different Shade of Violet?

by K E Osborn

  “Fuck you, you scum dog,” I say and I spit in his face.

  “Fuck woman, calm the fuck down,” he yells back at me.

  I struggle, but his grip is really tight on my wrists so I use the only weapon I can. I lean forward abruptly and head butt the passenger in the head. A pain stabs through my forehead forcing my head fall back in agony. I open and close my eyes trying to stop the dizziness that’s overwhelming my mind.

  “Fuuuuck,” he yells. “You’re fucking insane,” he states holding onto me tighter.

  “You okay, Mark?” the driver asks turning to look at us both.

  “Yeah, I’m fine Duke. I think crazy is a bit dazed though,” Mark says and I stop fighting. Duke, the driver, isn’t pulling over if anything he’s driving faster, so I slump forward and rest my forehead on Mark’s shoulder as I straddle him.

  “Mark check her,” Duke says as I start to doze in and out a little.

  “Hey Violet, are you with me?” Mark asks as he pulls my head off his shoulder and looks at me.

  “We’re not going to hurt you, okay?” I furrow my brows and look at him as the car screeches to a halt. I look around and notice familiar surroundings. The front passenger side door opens up quickly and I’m pulled out of the car and off Mark’s lap.

  “Jesus Christ! Mark, what the fuck is she on your lap?” I hear someone ask as I stand up and look around. We’re out the front of the bloody cabin.

  What the fuck?

  “She went mental. We didn’t want to scare her off before we could bring her back here, but I think she thought we were members of the Rebels—”

  “You’re not in cahoots with Mad Dog?” I ask as Duke gets out and walks over to me showing me his gun and badge.

  “No Violet, we’re the shift change for the protective guards at the gate,” Duke answers and I look over at Mark with my eyes open wide.

  “Oh fuck! I’m so sorry,” I say to Mark and he shakes his head and rubs his forehead. “It’s okay, we should’ve just told you who we were.”

  “Is she here?” I hear Hudson call out. I turn around and see him rushing out of the cabin and down toward me. I can’t tell if he’s angry or terrified by the look on his face.

  “What the fuck happened, Vee?” he yells as he runs up to me and picks me up in an embrace. “I was so worried the Dogs got you while I was in the shower. Fuck! I’ve never been so scared in all my life,” Hudson says nuzzling into me.

  “It’s okay, I left of my own accord,” I say not holding him back.

  He shakes his head as his hands run all over my body checking every inch of me. “I was so damn worried, Vee. I’ve never been more terrified in all my life. I thought I’d lost you. Why would you do that to me?” he asks as his hands continue to search my body frantically for injury while I stand here motionless.

  Mark starts to snicker under his breath. “We’ll let you get back to protecting your little lady,” he says and winks at Hudson.

  Hudson sends him a death glare and Mark shakes his head smirking.

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know us or our relationship so just shut your mouth, Mark,” Hudson berates making me raise my eyebrow in surprise at his defensiveness.

  Mark rolls his eyes. “Geez Stone calm down—”

  “Don’t tell me to calm down you fucking smartarse,” Hudson says loudly sounding angrier by the second as he continues to run his hands over me.

  “Just remember I was the one who found her and brought her back to you, you could show a bit of gratitude you know,” Mark says and walks back over to the car.

  Hudson exhales and I look into his eyes and I can see he’s struggling. He seems really upset. He caresses my cheek as he looks down at me and swallows hard.

  “We’ll… ah… leave you to it, watch dog. Don’t let her slip away again. It’s just lucky Mark and Duke were on their way and they spotted her on the road. I’ll have to call this into Chief Thomas though, you know that, right?” one of the other policeman says and Hudson nods as the cop and his partner get back into their car.

  “Want us to stick around for a while or are we okay to go back up to the drive?” Duke asks Hudson.

  He finally lets me go and he looks at me flaring his nostrils. Okay, I think he’s angry, not terrified or struggling.

  “No, it’s okay. I have it from here. Thanks for finding her guys,” he says pulling me to him and wrapping his arms around me tightly.

  “No worries, but look out Stone, she has a mean head butt,” Mark states.

  “Sorry,” I say as Hudson looks at me and furrows his brows.

  They get into the car and drive off back up the driveway as Hudson and I continue to get drenched in the rain.

  “C’mon, let’s get you inside,” he says while he basically drags me inside the cabin. He shuts the front door and turns me to look at him. “What were you thinking?” he asks looking hurt as he leans in and pulls my jacket off me, letting it fall to the floor. I wonder briefly why he’s undressing me, but I honestly don’t care.

  “You don’t want me, Hudson. I’m living on borrowed time. Why wait for the inevitable… I’m dead anyway, I was just searching for it sooner.”

  He stops and looks into my eyes. “You’re giving up? Where’s the fighter I know gone?” he asks as he leans in and starts to unbutton my pajama top. I look down to see my exposed breasts coming into view, but I don’t question what he’s doing, I just let him do whatever he wants.

  “What’s the point in fighting when you have nothing to fight for, Hudson. You know as well as I do that we’re done. You also know that ratting on the Dogs, basically sealed my fate, so what’s the point in waiting. I just want this over with,” I say and he sniffs and shakes his head while he frowns.

  “You think just because I stopped before, after your dream, that I don’t want you? You’re willing to let Mad Dog find you because of that?”

  “I guess,” I say and he groans and turns away running his fingers through his hair.

  “Fuck Vee, don’t you get it?” he blurts out turning back toward me.

  I shake my head as I stand there dripping wet with my pajama top open exposing my breasts to him, which I still have no idea why he’s done that.

  “What’s the point Hudson? You can’t stand the thought of touching me. There’s no way we can get past that? So tell me, what’s the fucking point to any of this?”

  He exhales and looks in my eyes. “The thought of kissing you a month ago sent a shiver down my spine and not in a good way—”

  “Gee thanks,” I murmur and he shakes his head and walks back over to me pulling my wet pajama top off me leaving me topless in the kitchen.

  “Just listen! Yes, a month ago the mere thought of touching you was something I couldn’t comprehend, but it goes to show with time I can get past it—”

  “Really? Because you stopping before, fucking makes me tend to disagree,” I rebut.

  “Vee, the fact that I was almost willing to go there proves to me I will get over it with time.”

  I can’t let myself get my hopes up, there’s no use in that. “I still don’t see what the point is? Don’t you want Cassie back anyway?” I ask and he furrows his brows and looks at me confused.

  “What? No. Why? Why would you say that?” he asks and steps forward taking the hem of my pants, including my panties, in his hands and starts to pull them down my legs. I raise an eyebrow wondering what the hell he’s doing.

  “Because she rang while you were in the shower. She’s a better match for you, Hudson.”

  He looks at me and shakes his head. “She technically may be a better match for me, but she isn’t the woman I want,” he says bending down, pulling off my shoes and tapping my ankle so I can step out of my pants and panties, leaving me completely naked in front of him.

  “Don’t try to make me stay here by telling me you want me more than her. I know we can never work, Hudson. So I’m giving up on us. Even though, for some reason unknown to me,
you’re stripping me naked right now?” I say kind of like a question.

  He stands up and I can’t help but notice his eyes drift toward my exposed breasts. “You’re naked because it’s freezing and you’re all wet. You need to warm up and being in your wet clothes won’t do that.”

  “You’re all wet too,” I say and he looks down at his wet jeans and tank top. He must’ve put them on before he called the guards down. He looks back up at me and smirks, then grabs the hem of his tank and pulls it off over his head. Then he unbuttons his jeans and I raise an eyebrow at him and frown.

  What the fuck is he doing?

  He pulls his jeans and his boxers off so we’re both standing completely naked in the kitchen of the cabin. I can’t help it as I look down to his semi-erect cock and I grin slightly. He chuckles and leans in sweeping me off my feet lifting me up. I squeal and quickly wrap my arms around his neck for support.

  “Guess I better find a way to warm us both up then, hey?” he asks walking me toward the bathroom. I nod and even though everything in me wants to fight this pull I’m feeling between Hudson and me, I lean into his chest and take in his warmth surrounding me. We get to the bathroom and he puts me down and leans into the shower alcove and turns on the tap.

  “The shower is really small, Hudson. I don’t think we’ll both fit.”

  He smirks and shakes his head. “Then I’ll just have to hold you to me. To be honest, I don’t ever want to let you out of my sight or grip again. Knowing you’re willing to run from me only makes me realise that I need to try harder. I want to try harder for you, Vee,” he says looking into my eyes and he looks sincere.

  I don’t know what he means by that. Whether it’s to try harder to keep me here and stop me from running to my own demise or whether it means try harder for us. But either way I’m not sure I’m willing to try. I think all my energy is gone and I really can’t be bothered waiting around anymore. I’m not a patient person. I hate waiting for things and knowing that this little ‘vacation’ Hudson and I are on will eventually end and things will inevitably fall apart again - well I don’t know if I want to wait around for that to happen.

  He takes my hand and we step over the edge of the bathtub and into the shower. The water is so hot each drop is stinging, but I like it, it reminds me that I can feel, that I don’t have to be numb to everything. He pulls our bodies close together and he wraps his arms around my waist holding our naked bodies tightly.

  I exhale and realise that I’m cold enough to go along with whatever it is he’s doing. So I wrap my arms around his waist and nuzzle my head into his chest. He positions us completely under the running stream and because our bodies are connected the hot water is sliding down both of us. I must admit, his plan of warming us up is starting to thaw even my cold heart a little. I always loved the feeling of his skin on mine and, to be honest, the only way we could be closer is if he was inside me. But that’s not what this shower is about. It’s about comfort, not anything sexual and I know that. His hand comes up and gently caresses my hair, I can hear his heart racing in his chest.

  “Your heart’s racing,” I mumble.

  He continues to caress my scalp. “I know, I was so scared I’d lost you, Vee. I don’t know if I’m more relieved that you’re okay or angrier that you took off like that. I don’t know how to feel. All I do know is I can’t stand to let go of you right now. I need to be close to you because the thought that I’d lost you… well, it killed me, Vee. I have never and I mean never been so scared of anything in all my life. So please, please, don’t run away again. You’ll give me a heart attack.”

  I cuddle into him further and hold him as tightly as I can. Hearing him say stuff like that makes me feel again. I feel like I want to cry, but I know I won’t. I only cry in my dreams these days.

  “I’m sorry I left. Cassie threw me and you stopping upset me. I just don’t know how to think or feel anymore, Hudson. And you throwing your mixed signals all over the place is doing my head in to be perfectly honest,” I say and he exhales and holds me tighter.

  “I love you, Violet. There was never any doubt of that. And I want to be with you, more than anything, but you know with our jobs that makes life more difficult for us. I can’t be seen to be dating a madam. It just wouldn’t work, Vee. So, for as long as we’re here, this can be our last time together. After you come out of protective custody, we can still see each other. I don’t want you out of my life completely because I can’t function without you. But for as far as being a couple, I don’t think it’s possible. Not unless one of us gives up our job, and I know I can’t do that because I’ve worked too hard and seen too many good people fall not to be out there catching the bad guys—”

  “Are you asking me to quit my job?” I ask looking up at him raising an eyebrow.

  “No, I would never ask you to do that. Cupiditas is your business. I know you don’t go on call anymore and trust me I’m grateful for that, but even so, being the owner of an establishment like that means we can’t be together. I suggest while we’re here we make the most of our limited time together,” he says and I frown.

  “I don’t think that’s such a good idea. Won’t it just make our separation harder?” I ask starting to feel that emotional pull again, the one where I feel like everything is ending.

  “Probably, but Vee, I can’t be in this small cabin with you and not be around you. Especially after tonight. I need to know you’re okay. I need to feel your body and kiss your lips because there’s one thing I don’t want and that’s for us to avoid each other, even when this is over. I want you in my life. I don’t know how or in what capacity yet, but I know I can’t live in a world without you in it. When I thought Mad Dog had you, I couldn’t cope, Vee. I fell apart in front of my co-workers. I was literally shaking and crying wondering where you were. You scared me to death, Vee, and it made me realise I need you in my life… always,” he says and I look into his eyes and see that he's completely serious.

  “I just think that if we spend our time together here, when we leave it will be that much harder and I don’t think I can do it.”

  He swallows hard and frowns. “Okay, just don’t avoid me then. Treat me like an old friend if you have to, just please don’t ignore me.”

  I nod my head and nuzzle back into his chest as the hot water runs over us both.

  “I’m sorry things worked out this way, Vee. I wish the rules could be broken,” he says and I close my eyes wishing that I didn’t have to give up my business to be with him. And to be honest I don’t know if I’m willing to do that or not.

  I mean why can’t he give up being a cop?

  If he really wanted to be with me, wouldn’t he give it all up for me? So I decide to let him go. I agree with him that being strangers in this cabin would result in an awkward tension and I don’t want our last days together to be filled with that. I’m going to act normal from now on around him and just enjoy his company. If anything happens, it happens, but once we leave here, it’s officially over between us.

  “I still love you. I will always love you, Hudson,” I say looking up at him and I can see in his eyes that we both know we are done. But we’ll keep up the pretense for now and just see what happens. I’m not going to force anything and I don’t think he will either. What will be, will be.

  He caresses my head and leans down toward me slightly. “Can I kiss you?”

  I love that he asked.

  Why is it that when he’s not around, I’m strong and as tough as can be, but the moment he gets close or touches me I lose my self-control and become weak and insipid?

  “Anytime you want to,” I say, rolling my eyes at the fact that I just proved my own point - I’m completely weak when it comes to Hudson.

  He smiles and leans down kissing me gently in the warmth of the shower.

  “I love you too, baby,” he whispers against my lips and I sigh knowing this is only making it harder, but right now I don’t care. His lips against mine are all I want. We kiss s
lowly for a few minutes just taking each other in. The chemistry is starting to return and I open my mouth to let him in. His tongue dances with mine and I notice his cock hardening against me, but I don’t make any moves. It’s just nice to know kissing me still turns him on. He moves his hand from my back down to my arse and he grips it tightly while his other hand grips onto my hair. I start to kiss him a little more forcefully, I can’t help myself. He kisses back passionately and I start to move my body without realising it. I grind into his erection and he moans slightly into our kiss. I run my hands up his back and into his hair holding his mouth to mine forcefully.

  “I’ve never wanted anyone like the way I want you, Vee,” he murmurs against my lips.

  I know this isn’t achieving anything, but maybe it’s the goodbye we need.

  “You can have me, Hudson,” I whisper back and he groans loudly.

  His hand moves from around my arse to my pussy and I open my legs to let him in. We’re both breathing heavily and my heart is racing. It’s been so long since I’ve been with him and I honestly couldn’t handle it if he worked me up only to freak out again. But my body is defying my mind and it won’t stop.

  His hand moves in between my legs and he cups my pussy with his palm making me moan, any touch from him sets me on fire and I love that he has the power to do that. He moves his finger along my folds and to my throbbing clit. He presses on it hard and I cry out into his mouth. A jolt shoots right through me which makes me grip onto Hudson’s hair tightly. His lips move from mine and he kisses down my cheek to my neck where I tilt my head to give him access. He sucks gently on my neck and starts to swirl his finger around my clit. I gasp as I start to breathe heavier and faster while he works me up.

  I bring one leg up to rest on the edge of the bathtub so he can move easier. He swirls his finger on my clit again and his lips come back to meet mine. His kiss is full of passion and I can’t help it my body starts to react to his stimulation. I move my hips in time with his swirls as he brings his other hand down to my erect nipple. He rolls it between his fingers and pinches it hard making me gasp out in pleasure. He slips two fingers inside me and pushes them in deeply. I moan as my head falls back feeling the impending high creeping up on me. He pushes in and out making sure to hit just the right spot every time he pushes inside me.