I Can't Let Go

by Chenell Parker

  Tino helped his cousin get right in the bed before he left and went outside to the bullet riddled car. He gave one of the nurses Dirty’s phone and waited for his cousin to show up and get the product out of the damaged ride. Once that was done, Tino called his uncle Mateo and arranged to meet with him before it was time. As much as he would have loved to talked to his own father, he just couldn’t do it. Knowing Ced, he would have tried to go at Ramon on some talking shit, but they were way past that point. He didn’t want to put his father in a bad position if it ever came down to it. Ramon was a dead man if he had any involvement in what happened to Tino and Dirty. No one, not even Ced, could stop that from happening.

  V enus looked down at her ringing phone and silenced it once again. It was the fourth time it rang in thirty minutes and she was over it. Johnny had been calling her all day, but she had no words for him. Koi had been blowing her up too and she was sure that she was calling for her cousin. Venus was in a foul mood for more reasons than one. She had been trying to repair her friendship with Zoe for over a week with no results. She was lonely without her best friend and Venus was ready to kiss ass and make up. Zoe never stayed mad at her for too long and she was surprised that she hadn’t caved yet. She was upset for nothing anyway. Venus didn’t even fuck with Franco anymore. They were supposed to hook up the day she got into it with Zoe, but he never showed up to the room that Venus rented. When she called him the next day, he told her that it was fun while it lasted but it was a wrap on whatever they had. Admittedly, Venus felt played. She had been rejected by yet another Lopez man and she was in a foul mood. Now, after fucking up her plan, Johnny was calling her probably to explain why. There was no explanation for not getting the job done and she didn’t want to hear it. Venus was deep in thought when her doorbell rang. She wasn’t expecting company, but she went to open it anyway.

  “What are you doing here?” Venus asked when she saw Johnny standing there.

  “Is something wrong with your phone?” Johnny asked her while inviting himself into her house.

  “No but something must be wrong with your ears. I told you that I didn’t want to be bothered,” Venus replied with an attitude.

  “You need to grow the fuck up!” Johnny snapped.

  “And you need to grow some balls. You had one fucking job. One!” Venus yelled angrily while pushing him away.

  “Keep your fucking hands to yourself!” Johnny gritted.

  “Get out!” Venus yelled while walking to her front door.

  “You mad because a nigga didn’t commit a murder for your hoe ass. I’m happy that the shit fell through. You told me that the bitch stole some money from you. All the while you got me and my people out here about to body a bitch because she took your nigga,” Johnny replied with a disgusted frown.

  Usually, when Johnny and his people put in work, they hopped out the car shooting first. He was happy that they switched shit up when they went at Kimora. Johnny hadn’t seen her since she was younger but, after studying her features for a minute, realization kicked in.

  She was AJ’s younger sister and she looked just like Miko. AJ used to be crazy about his younger siblings and they were all that he ever talked about. Miko was always around because she was in the dope game too. Johnny was in love with Miko at one time, but he was too young to settle down with one woman. He was five years older than Miko at the time and he was the one who took her virginity. She got pregnant twice and he made her get rid of them both times. Miko was only sixteen, so she did whatever he said with no hesitation. When she finally got fed up, she left him alone and moved on with her life. Johnny tried to get with her again, but she wasn’t having it.

  He had history with Miko and her brother, and he couldn’t see himself killing their little sister like Venus wanted him to. Sadly, if one of his boys wasn’t so hung up on wanting the car, Kimora would have probably been dead by now. The Bentley that she was riding in had unintentionally saved her life.

  Johnny remembered a time when he had to steal just to eat. His mother stayed in and out of jail and he didn’t want to report that to anyone because he knew that he would become a ward of the state. They didn’t pay rent, lights or water, thanks to housing assistance so he kept a roof over his head. He and AJ were always cordial but never really cool. That all changed once AJ found out about his living arrangements. Johnny remembered AJ picking him up from school and taking him shopping for food and clothes one day. He was the first one who gave him some weed to sell, and he didn’t ask for anything in return. AJ put his boys on too and they felt the same way he did. The hood knew him for being kindhearted and they all mourned when he was killed. Even in death, Johnny couldn’t see himself ever betraying him. Fuck whatever Venus was talking about.

  “I got mad niggas after me boo. The fuck I look like trying to kill another bitch over a man,” Venus replied, successfully pulling Johnny away from his thoughts of the past.

  “Stop lying hoe! Koi already told me what was up. That girl didn’t do a damn thing to you. Shit, my loyalty is to her more than you anyway. I might tell her what your grimy ass was trying to do and let her nigga knock your head off,” Johnny threatened, making Venus’ heart drop.

  “As if I give a fuck,” Venus replied.

  “You better be lucky that I ain’t no snitchin’ ass nigga. You a dirty ass bitch but you gon’ get what’s coming to you,” Johnny warned before walking out and slamming the door behind him.

  Venus was furious as she locked her door and flopped back down on the sofa. She talked too damn much, and she always had. She regretted telling Koi about Kimora when she was venting one day. Koi was messy as fuck, but Venus was done with her. Her contract was almost up at the shop and Venus refused to renew it.

  After grabbing her phone, Venus called Zoe’s number again and prayed that her friend picked up. When the voicemail picked up, she blew out a frustrated breath and decided to leave yet another message.

  “Zoe, it’s me again. I’m sorry, okay. Please call me back. I was wrong and I apologize. You’re my best friend and I need you,” Venus said as tears fell from her eyes.

  Zoe had been in her life for as long as she could remember, and she couldn’t bear the thought of losing her. Venus was always reckless with her words, but she didn’t mean anything that she said. Miguel was probably happy that they were at odds with each other. Knowing him, he was more than likely the one prolonging things. Usually, Zoe would be okay in a day or two and that was the longest that they’d ever gone without speaking.

  Venus was bored as hell and didn’t want to be inside. Since she didn’t want to fuck with Koi or Johnny anymore, she decided to hit up Ronald’s girlfriend, Simone, to see if she wanted to hang. Venus had been around her and her family a few times and they were always cool. Not only that, but Simone usually kept her up to date with the latest news on Tino and Kimora. Simone was ghetto as fuck but that was a small price to pay until Zoe came around and forgave her.

  “Hello,” Kimora said when she groggily answered the phone. She was just waking up from a nap but she wasn’t ready to get out of bed.

  “Kimora, this is Shakira and I have Sydnee on the phone. I’m sorry for disturbing you but you need to wake up,” Shakira replied.

  “I’m up. What’s going on?” Kimora asked.

  “Girl, Hassan and Hudson got arrested this morning and so did my stupid ass husband,” Shakira replied.

  “What happened?” Kimora asked as she sat up in the bed.

  “Girl, they went down for a little bit of everything including money laundering. But, that’s not the half of it,” Sydnee said.

  “I’m listening,” Kimora replied, all traces of sleep now gone from her voice.

  “They found Kimberly’s remains,” Shakira said, speaking of Hassan’s ex-wife.

  “Damn. That’s fucked up,” Kimora sighed.

  “Yep and my husband was arrested for her murder, along with Hudson and Hassan. I don’t know how the police found out so much, but they’ll never see the
light of day again. They even have evidence of them conspiring to kill Harmony. That bitch was lucky that the police stepped in when they did,” Shakira said.

  “I know I might be wrong, but I don’t feel bad for them. They did so many people dirty and karma came back for their asses,” Sydnee noted.

  “And I’m sorry Kimora, but it seems that Ben was the one who started the fire at your house too,” Shakira said.

  “I’m sure that Hassan told him to do it,” Kimora replied.

  “Maybe so but he’s a grown ass man. Hassan couldn’t make him do anything. I was gonna move back to Detroit, but I changed my mind. I like living in Carmel and the cost of living is cheaper. My mom is giving me the money to start up my own business. I think I’m gonna get a food truck and do it that way. I’m sure our restaurant will be seized, along with the rest of Hassan and Hudson’s shit,” Shakira said.

  “I know Elaine is having a fit. I’m sure she knew what was going on too. Hassan was her heart,” Kimora said, right as Tino walked into the bedroom. He laid down in the bed next to her and kissed her neck.

  “She’s not gonna be able to survive without Hudson. She’s never worked a day in her life and she probably won’t have access to any of their bank accounts,” Shakira replied.

  Kimora talked to them for a little while longer before getting off the phone. Hassan had been too quiet, and she knew that something had to be wrong. After the fire and her leaving Carmel for good, he had starting sending her all kinds of threatening text messages. Tino admitted to beating his ass and Kimora wasn’t remorseful about it. Hassan needed more than a broken jaw but that was a start. Once she got her number changed, the messages stopped and the emails started up. After a while, she stopped hearing from him altogether and now she knew why.

  “What happened?” Tino asked her.

  “That was Shakira and Sydnee telling me about Hassan and his people. Hassan, his daddy and Ben got arrested,” Kimora said as she ran the entire story down to him.

  “Fuck them niggas.” Tino frowned.

  He already knew about everything that Kimora had told him and then some. It was Tino who got the ball rolling and things worked out better than he expected. The first day he went to Hassan’s office, he planted a small camera on the picture of Kimora and Santina that he kept on his bookshelf. Hassan talked freely in his office after hours and Tino had all the proof that he needed. He was mad with himself for not knowing about the fire at Kimora’s house until after it happened. He was drinking with Dirty and crashed too hard the night before. Tino even knew about Kimora’s contracts with the lawyers not being renewed, which was why he went out and leased her a building of her own. He even knew about the multiple women that he was cheating with. He tried his best to stay two steps ahead of Hassan and, for the most part, he did. Once he had enough evidence to bury him, he created a bogus email and sent it to their local law enforcement agency and news station. They moved fast as hell because he’d only sent it all the day before.

  “Where is Tina?” Kimora asked.

  “Making a fool of my mama and daddy. You wanna go check on the house and see how everything is coming along?” Tino asked.

  “Yeah, we can do that,” she replied.

  “I’m ready to move baby. I haven’t lived with my mama since I was eighteen years old. This shit ain’t what’s up.” Tino frowned.

  “I know Tino but this is by choice. It ain’t like we couldn’t afford to rent something until the house got ready. Besides, your mama and daddy are enjoying Tina being here,” Kimora pointed out.

  “Yeah, I know. My mama gon’ cry when she leave,” he laughed. Although he was laughing, he knew that it was true. Val was so attached to her only granddaughter now and she didn’t make a move without her.

  Once Kimora got dressed, she and Tino got something to eat before going to their house. Tino was paying one of his cousin’s girlfriends to go there every day to let the interior decorators in and lock up when they were done. When they walked in, she was sitting on the sofa watching the huge newly mounted tv that covered the wall. They spoke to her and proceeded to walk around the massive home, admiring the work that had been done so far. They were both pleased with the results thus far and even happier that the work was almost done.

  “You still don’t want to know the sex of the baby?” Tino asked Kimora as they stepped into the room that would belong to their unborn child.

  They hadn’t decided on what they wanted to do with it yet because Kimora wanted the sex to be a surprise. She would know what she was having when she went to her next appointment but she didn’t want Tino to tell her.

  “Nope. I didn’t find out with Tina until the day she was born,” Kimora replied.

  “Yeah, well, I wouldn’t know anything about that.” Tino frowned.

  “Don’t start Santino. I’m tired of apologizing,” Kimora sighed.

  “I’m not starting nothing. I was just stating facts. But you not knowing might be a problem,” he said.

  “How so?” Kimora asked.

  “I’m gonna want the room decorated and you’ll figure it out when I do,” he replied.

  “Yeah, I didn’t think about that. We’ll figure something out.” Kimora shrugged.

  They spoke to the lead decorator, who told them that they would be done in about two more weeks. That was music to Tino’s ears and he couldn’t wait. Doing the baby’s room was nothing and they could finish that in one or two days once they found out the sex. As soon as they left the house, Kimora’s phone rang and Prince’s number popped up. Kimora talked to her best friend every day but she hadn’t seen him in three days. He was claiming to be in love and his mystery woman had his nose wide open.

  “Hey bestie,” Kimora said when she answered the phone.

  “Man, on God, I’m bout to go to jail for murder,” Prince fumed.

  “Why? What’s wrong?” Kimora asked.

  “These hoes ain’t never fucking satisfied. A nigga chilled out with all these other bitches and try to do right and for fucking what? The shit still ain’t good enough!” Prince yelled angrily.

  “Calm down Princeton. Tell me what happened?” Kimora begged.

  “I hate these hoes man! I swear I’m going to jail in this bitch today!” Prince barked, making Kimora move the phone away from her ear.

  “Are you at home Princeton?” Kimora asked.

  “Yeah man,” Prince replied, sounding sad.

  “I’m on my way. Just calm down and stay on the phone until I get there,” Kimora replied.

  Tino didn’t know what was going on, but he headed to Prince’s house so that Kimora could check on him. Prince was usually calm and laid back, so it must have been something bad to make him snap the way he did. When they pulled up to the house, Al was walking out the front door. When he saw Kimora and Tino get out of the car, he stopped to talk to them.

  “I’m going by my girl for the night. Your boy is in there wildin’,” Al said while looking at Kimora.

  “What happened?” Kimora asked.

  “I don’t even know. One of them hoes must have made him mad. The nigga ain’t really been fucking with nobody, so I don’t know what’s going on. He in there telling somebody that he gon’ kill them and shit. I’m gone,” Al replied as he went to his car.

  Kimora used her key to open the door before she and Tino walked inside. Prince was pacing back and forth with the phone up to his ear, going off on somebody. He had a half empty bottle of Hennessey in his hand that he kept sipping from.

  “What the fuck else do you want a nigga to do? I don’t even have time to fuck with nobody else because I’m always with your ass!” he yelled.

  His eyes were red and he was sweating like crazy. Kimora didn’t know what the person on the other end of the phone said, but it seemed to anger him even more. Prince threw his phone across the room and started losing it.

  “Calm down bruh. What’s going on?” Tino asked him.

  “Give me this damn bottle. Sit down and relax Princeto
n,” Kimora ordered as she snatched the liquor from him. She wet a towel with cold water and started wiping his forehead.

  “I can’t win for fucking losing,” Prince sighed as he fell back on the sofa.

  “What are you talking about Princeton?” Kimora asked.

  “I must be a real fucked up individual to have this kind of luck,” Prince chuckled sarcastically.

  “You’re starting to piss me off with all these riddles,” Kimora fussed.

  “You know me, Kimora. You know how I was raised and all the hell that I went through as a child. Because of that, I swore that I never wanted to have kids of my own. But, somewhere along the line, my views on that changed. Now, I got a baby on the way that I really want and this bitch is talking about killing it. I guess this is payback for all the abortions that I paid for in the past. How fucking ironic is that?” Prince laughed, even though he didn’t find anything funny.