Indulge

by Liv Morris

  She leans back, looks me up and down, takes a sharp intake of breath and says. “Garrett, you’re beautiful,” as she rubs her little hands over my upper body. She’s tracing the tattoo on my upper arm and shoulder. She’s mesmerized by the look of it. It’s not exactly your run of the mill tattoo. It’s a tribal band with a court jester above. I’m really worked up and so is she. I’m not sure if she wants this to continue, but I know I’m toeing this line carefully.

  “Baby, I love doing all this with you. I don’t think I’ve ever loved anything more, but if we don’t stop this right now, I’m not sure I’ll be able to control myself much longer.”

  She looks a little frustrated. I can see her mind is working in overdrive when she starts rambling, “Yeah, I guess you’re right, but it feels so good. I like feeling this good. I haven’t had this feeling in a long time. I think I got a little too excited. I’m sorry.”

  She’s sorry? I just told her how much I love touching her and kissing her, and now she thinks I don’t want to do this. “Alexis, look at me.” Her hazel eyes meet mine right away. “Baby, you said you needed time. If you want me to keep touching you I will, believe me I want to. I’m trying real hard not to push you too far. You need to drive this train if you want more of this, because I don’t want to screw this up by doing something you don’t want.” She blushes.

  She’s biting her bottom lip, trying to avoid saying something. I remember that about her. She’s very outspoken and when she feels like she can’t keep her mouth shut she bites down on it. Another thing that is so damn sexy about her. “I don’t want to move too fast. But, I didn’t expect to feel sad about having to stop kissing you. I just want to be close to you while I can. You’re going to leave me soon and I want to have this time.” LEAVE HER SOON? What the hell is she talking about? I told this girl I want her. Did she not understand that?

  Chapter 10

  When I invited Garrett over, never in a million years would I have thought this is what we’d be doing. I thought we’d be rehashing what happened last night and plotting how to avoid it again. But it feels too good to stop. Having someone touch me, damn near worship my body with clothes on, feels incredible. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this good when a man’s touched me. Garrett’s touch sends this rush of joy through my body, along with the stampede of butterflies.

  He wants to be my guy. I’m not really sure what that means in the grand scheme of things, but I do know I want him enough that I’ll let him be whatever he wants. I’m not ready to stop what we’ve started tonight, and since I have to conduct this train, I will.

  I reach for the hem of my tank top, lifting it over my head. I’m not wearing a bra, since my tank had one built in. He’s looking at me with glassy, lust drunk eyes. He sucks in a breath and say’s, “Damn, Baby. It’s on!” He stands up, carrying me with him, over to the larger outdoor sofa. He lays me down on my back, kneels beside me on the ground looking over my chest, and glides the tips of his fingers up and down my chest. “Alexis, you’re the most beautiful creation I’ve ever seen. Baby, I’m going to kiss all over you, is that okay?”

  I nod my head looking directly at him. “Yes, I need you, Garrett. Now.”

  “Baby, tell me what you want me to do. You say it's too soon, but then say you need me. When you need something I want to make it happen. Tell me, do you want me to kiss you here?” he asks, looking at my hardened nipple and tracing it with the tip of his finger.

  “Yes, please,” I whimper.

  He does. He kisses and licks my breast, neck, stomach, and hips. When he reaches my hips he’s caressing my lower abdomen, just below the waist band of my pants. I’m dying for him to touch me lower. I’m lifting my hips, trying to give him every clue possible, but he’s being cautious. My body is hot, the warmth pooling between my thighs is throbbing. There’s no way I’m letting him stop. He can’t!

  “Lex, I promise I won’t do anything you don’t want, but, sweetheart, let me take care of you and make you feel good. Is that okay?”

  “Yes! Yes! Please!” I almost yell. He slides my pants off, leaving me in my panties and him in his jeans and sneakers. I reach for his waist band to unbutton his jeans, but he shakes his head at me.

  “No, baby, this is for you. Relax for me. I need to do this right.”

  I want to touch him and feel him. I can already see that he’s constricted in his jeans. “That could be for me, too, Garrett.”

  He smirks, his eyes filled with lust. He slides his hand into my panties, brushing his fingers against my clit. I feel the growing sensation and know I’m going to explode. We’re kissing with our eyes open. He’s carefully watching me. It drives me crazy and just before I know I’m about to fall apart, he tucks a finger inside me and I finally let go. “Oh my…oh my…Garrett, please kiss me,” and he does.

  Picking me up as he stands, cradling me in his arms, he sits back down on the sofa. He kisses me and holds me. I’m so relaxed I could probably fall asleep right here. I want to, actually. “Baby, watching you explode in my arms is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. It doesn't get any better, but I think I need to put you to bed and go, sweetheart. You look tired and you have a very busy day tomorrow. Can I carry you to bed?” he asks.

  “Only if you sing me a lullaby,” I say.

  He smirks and laughs softly at me. “I’ll sing you whatever you want, Lex.”

  He reaches down for my pants and slides them up my legs, then finds my top and puts that on as well. He reaches for his shirt, but doesn’t put it on. He stands with me still in his arms. I’ve never been carried like this by a man... Garrett does it effortlessly. He navigates his way through my house all the way to my bedroom, cradling me in his arms. He pulls back the covers and lays me in the bed. “Sweetheart, I want to tuck you in before I go. Do you need to change into pajamas?”

  I wish I could be tucked into bed, but I have to lock up the house and check on Sierra. “No, it’s okay. I need to lock up the house and check on Sierra. I like that you tucked me in, but I’ll walk you out.”

  He shakes his head. “No, baby, I need to see you tucked safely into this bed. Let’s go peek in on Sierra, and then get you in bed too. I’ll lock up for you.”

  Sitting up I take him by the hand to Sierra’s room. I tiptoe into the room as Garrett waits for me by the door. I kiss her forehead and brush her hair off her sweet cheek. She sleeps like a log. She’s so peaceful when she’s resting. I tiptoe back out of the room, cracking the door, and walk directly into Garrett’s arms. He lifts me and carries me back to my bedroom. He stands me up next to him beside the bed, so I can pull off my pants, since I usually only sleep in a tank top and panties. Then I slide into the bed. His eyes run up and down the length of my body before he reaches down and pulls the covers up over my arms. I can see that he still has unfulfilled needs. I want to fix that, but he won’t let me.

  “Will you sing to me, Garrett?” He looks at me with those glassy eyes again, only they aren’t lust filled. There’s something else there that I don’t quite recognize. “My old guitar is over there,” I say pointing to the corner of the room.

  He walks over to pick up my old guitar case. He takes the guitar out, adjusts the keys to make sure it’s in tune, and starts strumming a quick soft chord before walking back to the bed. He sits beside me, and starts playing the chords to Wanted by Hunter Hayes and singing to me. It’s the sweetest lullaby anyone could ever sing. There is so much more to this man than I ever realized. He sings to me and I rest my hand on his knee. I’m overwhelmed with the feelings he stirs up in me. I’m not really sure how to deal with them all. I feel tears prickling the back of my eyes and then spilling down my cheeks when he finishes the song.

  “Baby, please tell me those are happy tears.” I nod my head, because I can’t possibly speak without opening the flood gates further. He bends, quietly kissing my cheeks until all the tears are kissed away. When he’s successfully completed his task he says, “Goodnight, sweetheart, thank you for tonight. I’ll loc
k up and turn the lights off.” I’m trusting him with my body, with my heart, with everything. I can surely trust him to lock up the house so that we are safe.

  “Thank you, Garrett.” I see a little sparkle in his eye before he nods his head, kisses me one more time, then he walks out of bedroom switching off the light before he does so. I hear him checking and locking all the doors downstairs. My phone is plugged in on the nightstand beside the bed, so as soon as I hear the front door close, I pick it up and send him a text.

  Me: Thank you for tonight. I like ending my nights with you, Ace!

  Garrett: Ace? I think I like that too. Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping? I just tucked you in. Missing you already, lady. Wake up call in the am?

  Me: Sure, Ace it’s fitting. Start and finish my day, remember? What time do you want me to wake you?

  Garrett: I can’t wait to find out why you think that name is fitting. I want to start my day when you do. Call me as soon as your eyes flutter open. I’ll be dreaming of you tonight. Sleep well.

  I will sleep well tonight. Being tucked in, loved, kissed, and sung to before bed makes me feel cherished. I do this for Sierra every night, but I’ve never had anyone do this for me…not my parents when I was younger, not Jed, no one. I knew it was important time for Sierra and me, but I never understood the feeling of being on the receiving end. I feel safe and secure. Garrett is special…and he’s making me feel the words of the song he sang to me tonight. I can’t wait till morning.

  Chapter 11

  My phone rings the next morning at 6:24. I’ve been awake a while, just lying in bed, staring at the device, willing it to ring.

  “Good morning, Garrett!”

  “Good morning, sweetheart! Did you have sweet dreams?”

  I hear her dreamy little sigh through the phone. “Yes, when my night ends like last night, only sweet dreams are possible.”

  I had some pretty sweet ass dreams, too. Seeing her fall apart in my arms was something incredible, but tucking her sweet little body into bed and singing to her as her eyes got heavy. Damn…Damn…Damn! I want to do that again every night!

  “I have to go wake up Sierra, Garrett. I hope I get to talk to you later. Thank you again for coming over last night!”

  She’ll talk to me today for sure, no questions asked, whenever she damn well wants! “Baby, you call me whenever you want. Always remember what I said. Anytime.” We say our quick goodbyes, and she’s off and running on her crazy busy day.

  I need to start my day. I have a lot of phone calls to return and I need to check up on all the guys. We haven’t really talked much in the last few days, since thoughts of Alexis have consumed me. I can’t very well call them this early, so I’ll have to make do with my other crap first. I grab my leather messenger bag off the kitchen chair and pull out my laptop.

  I spend the next couple hours returning emails and speaking with Josh, my personal assistant, regarding upcoming promotional events, tour contracts, and a bunch of other stuff that takes up far too much time that should be spent writing music.

  I call Drew around 11:00 to check on Court. She’s like twenty-seven hundred months pregnant, or some shit like that. They’re leaving Tampa tomorrow morning to head back to Nashville. They’re driving back, since she can’t travel by plane anymore. I want to try and have lunch with them at that little Cuban restaurant down the street that Court loves.

  I push the call button next to Drew’s picture. When he answers, he sounds like he’s still sleeping.

  He answers the phone, “What’s up, McKenna?”

  “Dude, do you know it’s almost eleven o’clock, and your pregnant wife has missed breakfast if y’all are still in bed. I wanted to see if we could all have lunch before y’all head out,” I explain my reason for calling.

  “Man, my wife didn’t sleep three hours last night because she says my spawn feels like it has four arms and legs inside her belly kicking her all night. That little bugger can move and kick. I’m talk legs in her ribs, beating the hell out of her. Shit, I felt bad.” I laugh at the thought of Drew’s kid having all those arms and legs. “I didn’t understand what she was telling me when we were on the road, but damn, I got a pretty clear picture last night. I owe this girl so much pampering, and I’m spending all my time from now until whenever this little monster pops out doing just that!” He says sympathetically.

  Drew is over top in love with Courtney, a feat for that bad boy drummer. But for Drew, Courtney’s the only girl in the world worth spending any thoughts on. “We can meet up when she wakes up and feels like eating, but I’m not waking her, dude.”

  “Sounds like you got a future drummer on your hands. Call me when Court’s ready. Believe me, we all owe her. She hasn’t given us any shit for being on the road as much as we have been.” She hasn’t been even a little bit of the pain in the ass she deserved to be. “We can’t keep doing this you know. It’s not fair. We need to get this schedule under control,” I say, knowing we need to start making this a priority. We’re getting to an age where we need to start living our real lives and not just be musicians.

  “Yeah, I know. I don’t want to be leaving the family behind for months at a time, Garrett. They’re both coming with me next tour. Consider this your ‘Heads Up’,” he says in his typical no bullshit tone.

  “Yeah, got it. See you this afternoon,” I say before hanging up. We can’t do this to our families. Even though I am not the only single band member, I still can’t allow these guys to continue making this kind of sacrifice. Anyway, I think the idea of a committed relationship just got a lot more appealing to me in the last few days.

  Drew calls later that afternoon to meet up at the little Cuban place. Courtney loves Cuban sandwiches. You can’t really get anything that tastes this good in Nashville, so she’s making sure she gets her fill before she leaves town. She tells us all about the baby and how he’s keeping her awake all night, in the bathroom a hundred times a day, and hungry all the time. We laugh and talk to her about our road stories.

  Court asks where I’ve been the last few nights. She’s expected me to come hang out, like I’ve always done in the past. Drew’s my best friend. Usually we’re together in the same town when we have time off. I spend a lot of time hanging out at his house, even though, I have my own house right down the road. It’s lonely in that big house, so I only really ever sleep, and sometimes work, there. The fact that I’m staying in Tampa, instead of going home to Nashville with them is making them curious, I’m sure.

  “Is everything okay with your ‘rents?” Drew asks, prying for information.

  “Yeah, dude, just putting in some quality time,” I explain. “It’s been a while since I’ve been back hanging out in the old stomping grounds and haven’t been prepping for a show. You know?”

  Courtney frowns. “Garrett, will you come home when the baby is born? I want you to meet him.”

  Court’s become kind of like a sister. I don’t want her to be upset by my staying away, but I need to figure this out with Alexis. “Of course, girl! Try and keep me away!” I say to her and she smiles. I feel better immediately.

  I decide that I need some advice about what’s happening with Alexis. I know Drew and Court are the only ones I can trust with this information, so I spill the beans. “So…there’s this girl.” Drew drops his fork and it clatters on his plate. “I’ve known her since college. We lost touch, but I ran into her a few days ago.”

  Courtney looks surprised, but very interested. “Tell us about her.” She asks.

  “Well, it’s Alexis.” I’ve mentioned her several times to the guys, but never in detail, except for one drunken night a couple years ago when I told Court I thought I loved Alexis, still, and that she was the only girl I’d ever had feelings for.

  “What?” She says. “I thought you said she was married, G? You can’t go breaking up families. That’s wrong.” She looks at me sternly.

  Like I don’t know that! “Court, her husband died, like over a year and som
ething ago. She’s alone. I would never want to break up any family. You should know me better. But, Court, she’s more amazing than I remembered. This girl brings me to my damn knees. She’s got a really cute little girl, who’s turning five in a couple months. Her little girl looks just like her, but I’ve only seen her in pictures and when Lexi checked on her after she went to sleep. I can’t wait to really meet her.” I’m blabbering on and on while smiling from ear to ear, telling my best friends everything I can think of about Alexis, our college years, her singing, her as a mother, the house she helped design and did all the decorating for, how beautiful she is, everything, except the private parts from the last couple night. I don’t want to share those with anyone.

  Courtney looks from Drew, to me, then back to Drew and says, “Uh, we’re staying a few more days. I cannot leave town without meeting the girl he’s head over heels in love with. This baby is staying put at least another few weeks, anyway.”

  Drew nods his head. “Yeah, Court, I was thinking the same thing.” He picks up his phone and sends a quick text.

  “So, when can we meet her, since we’re sticking around? Tonight okay for dinner?”

  “Wait, guys, I’m not sure I’m seeing her tonight. She’s a single mom, and really busy. Shouldn’t you wait and find out if she’s even available before you go changing your schedules?”

  Court laughs. “Oh, if she likes you anywhere near the amount you love her, she wants to see you and meet us. Believe me!”

  I take out my phone to send a text to Alexis.

  Me: Hi, sweetheart. Having a good day?

  She responds within seconds.

  Alexis: having a happy day. Ran too far… Legs are tired but it could be that I’m getting too accustomed to being carried around instead of walking on my own! ;) How’s your day?