Worth the Drive

by Mara Jacobs

  Her head dropped, a blond curtain falling in front of her face. As she moved, and the curtain parted, he would catch glances of her eyelashes, her nose, her lips. Her breathing grew shorter, louder, pained. Soon would come the three short breaths that she took right before she came.

  He heard them as well as felt them. Then she came, her muscles clenching around his fingers, her wetness seeping over him, her arms quivering as if she couldn’t hold her weight any longer. Her moan sounding more feline than human.

  Her head knocking into his chin, eliciting a grunt from him.

  She didn’t notice, just kept spasming, spiraling. As she came down, her toes dug into the sheet and dragged it backward, as if kicking her little paws over some dirt, baring Darío. She came up on her haunches and Darío led himself to her. She came down on him hard, gasps coming from them both.

  His hands moved to her thighs, skimmed them up and down, watching as his hands disappeared under the tails of the green jacket. He had a sudden flash of having the jacket put on his shoulders the first time he’d won golf’s most coveted prize. He’d run his hands along the sleeves, just as he now did along Katie’s arms. He’d smoothed down the lapels, the buttons, treated it with reverence. He did the same to Katie, his fingers tracing where her skin met lapel. His hand not quite able to run flat along the buttons because of her bulge.

  The baby. She was showing enough now that the jacket pulled across her tummy, the button nearly popping.

  Emotions roiled through him as he looked up at the woman he loved, carrying a child he already loved, wrapped in the ultimate symbol of his success.

  The jacket became a blur and all he could see was the woman he would spend the rest of his life with. He rose up to meet her, to kiss her, taste her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him back, playing with his tongue, her hips finding a new, faster rythym. He buried his face in her neck, his hands sliding under the jacket to play with her breasts.

  He began mumbling in Spanish as he often did when buried deep inside Katie. What she meant to him. How good she felt. That she was precious, cherished. He knew she didn’t understand him but he was so mindless when he was this close that there was no way he could translate. She seemed to like when he spoke to her that way. Even now, her hips ground deeply into his, her legs spread more widely, allowing him to go deeper.

  “Te quiero,” he gasped as he spilled himself inside her. “Te quiero.”

  He felt her tense. Expected her to follow but she didn’t. He tried to hold back, but he was already coming. Nothing could stop him now. He tried to hold on, make it last, get her there again, but she collapsed against him, her face turned away.

  When he could finally catch his breath, he reluctantly pulled out of her. He turned them over, laying her down next to him. He undid the button of the jacket, surprised it had held. He spread the sides of the jacket wide, Katie’s body limp, allowing him full access. He gently laid his head on her hip, his hand coming up to stroke her belly.

  It seemed to have grown in the one night they’d been apart. He ran his hand across her heated skin, following the rise that protected his child.

  He looked up at her, expecting to see her looking back with that soft smile she wore when he did this to her.

  But she was not smiling back at him. Nor were her hands playing in his hair, smoothing his shoulders. Katie laid flat, hands at her sides, staring straight up at the ceiling, as if she were somewhere else. A million miles away.

  Darío thought he knew where she was. In the Copper Country. He hoped to hell she wasn’t thinking of Ron.

  Several days passed. Days that Darío took Katie sightseeing through the northern part of Spain. San Barria was a resort town that sat nestled between the Pyrenees, and the Bay of Biscay. The area was breathtaking, so rich in color. The people treated Darío as a long-lost war hero. It was obvious he was their favorite son. He was polite to all, even those whom he told Katie later had given his mother a hard time when she was raising him alone.

  Katie didn’t sleep in the guestroom again. She moved her things into Darío’s room, figuring either Sofia wouldn’t know, or, if she did, so what.

  Their lovemaking became frenzied as Katie tried to hold her emotions in check, to only respond to Darío physically. As if he sensed it, his claim on her took on a desperation, as if their time was limited. They would lay tangled in bed afterward, and then Katie would turn away, trying to keep her heart separate, knowing she was fighting a losing battle.

  She was in love with him. She couldn’t deny it any longer.

  He was attracted to her. Cared for her. Wanted to be a part of his child’s life. But that was it. It was te quiero, not te amo that he whispered to her, that he moaned in her ear while he came. And it wasn’t just the words. Though they seemed to be beyond it now, Darío had not trusted her, and the bottom line was he only fought for them to be together to give their child his name.

  The thought she had back in the airport – about a marriage where only one party loved– mocked her now, as she realized that indeed would be the case. Only she would be the one who loved. Could she do that to herself? To her child? Make Darío give up his chance to possibly find someone he loved? Would he ever come to love her?

  Darío was out back on the small putting green area, practicing, while Katie and Sofia shared iced tea in Sofia’s living room. They had formed an alliance of sorts, since they’d arrived, based on the baby Katie was carrying.

  And their mutual affection for Darío.

  “I love how you’ve decorated, Sofia. The house is so warm, it captures your culture so well, and yet is so comfortable.”

  Sofia graciously nodded her thanks.

  “And huge,” Katie added.

  Sofia chuckled. “Yes, I know, it is too much house for just two people. One, most of the time. But it was important to Darío to have this house. To have it here.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  Sofia settled into her chair, placed her glass on the table beside her. “This is where he grew up. Where he endured life in poverty, being called a bastard. It was important that he show these people that he had…made it… is how I think you say it.”

  Katie nodded, waited, hoping the woman would go on. Instead the woman rose, walked over to a beautiful antique desk and rummaged through a couple of drawers until she found what she was looking for. She brought a piece of paper over to Katie.

  A letter, Katie realized. It was addressed to the San Barria Golf and Country Club. The club that Darío’s mother had been a cook at. The club you could see from the balcony of Darío’s suite.

  “One of the maids at the club found this in the trash of the director’s office. We worked together many years, she and I.” Sofia’s eyes were soft, remembering. “She thought I might like to see it.” She handed the letter to Katie. “Apparently, a few years ago, the Club invited Darío to be a lifetime member, gratis. It is a very expensive and exclusive club.” She nodded at the paper as Katie took it out of the envelope. “Here is the best example of the kind of man my Darío is.”

  Katie read the letter. It was polite and gracious and read just like Darío spoke. He thanked them for the invitation, but declined. Stating that the invitation would have been welcome when he was younger, when his mother was in their employ and they’d struggled and scrimped so that Darío could play the course from time to time. When they were in need. Now that he could well afford to become a member, he was no longer interested in becoming one.

  Proud. Honorable. Making his point. So Darío.

  Sofia’s voice was soft. “The course he designed is only a few miles away. A beautiful course, one to rival San Barria. He has made it public, with very inexpensive greens fees. So that the people who live here, not just those who can afford to come to the resort, but those who work at the resort, have a grand course to play.” She sat back in her chair once more. “And yet, he made sure that this house was the finest in the area, and that it sit high on a hill over the Club. S
o that all there would know where he lived.

  “That is my Darío.”

  That was Darío, proud and honorable, yet needing to prove that he’d succeeded. He never flaunted, but he made sure people were aware of what he’d achieved. “You must be very proud of your son,” Katie said, proud of him herself.

  Sofia’s stately head bobbed. “Sî, sî.”

  Sensing a softness in the woman, Katie said, “May I ask you something, Sofia?”

  The woman’s demeanor did not change, but there was a sharpening of her eyes, a slight raise of a perfectly arched brow. “Of course.”

  “Is there anything you could share with me about Darío’s father?”

  Sofia didn’t seem surprised by Katie’s line of questioning, had probably been waiting for it. “We do not speak of Darío’s father,” Sofia said softly.

  A few months ago Katie would have let it go. But not now. She wanted to find out about Darío’s father. “Yes, Darío told me you don’t talk about it – talk about him. But, you see, I thought that…” Even the new, stronger Katie wilted as Sofia’s other brow shot up.

  “Of course. You must be curious because of the child you carry. You are wondering about genetics, illnesses things like that.”

  Katie had been, but that was only a small part of it. She’d also assumed that Darío’s genes, like hers, were just fine. And honestly, it didn’t really matter to her anyway. She’d love and cherish this baby no matter what. Illness and accidents can happen at any time. She chose not to think about those things until faced with the real possibility of them.

  Katie shook her head, proceeding cautiously. “No. It’s not that, although certainly I’m concerned about the baby’s health. It’s really more for Darío that I’m curious.”

  Sofia looked confused, gave her head a tiny shake. “I don’t understand.”

  “Darío’s feelings about his father are still unresolved. He was hoping to have some closure about it before he became a father himself.” Katie patted her belly. “Obviously time is running out to that end. I just thought if he knew more, maybe he could find some kind of peace with it all.”

  Sofia was stunned, Katie could easily see that. She looked around the room as if trying to orient herself. She took a long sip of tea, put the glass back on the table. Katie waited.

  “Darío does not have…how do you Americans say it… ‘issues’,” she raised her hands, making air quotation marks, “with his father. His father has never been a part of his life. He was curious as a child, of course, that is natural. But as he grew older, his questions stopped.”

  “That doesn’t mean he doesn’t still have them. He just assumed it was too painful for you to talk about, so he never brought it up.”

  “He has told you this?”

  Katie nodded. Sofia looked at her closely, as if seeing her for the first time. “And it is so important for you to know?”

  Katie nodded again. “Because it’s important to Darío.”

  “You love my son.” It was a statement more than a question.

  “Yes. Very much,” Katie answered.

  “You would do anything for his happiness?”

  “Yes. Of course.”

  Sofia nodded. She looked away, at a painting on the wall. It was of a cove along the beaches. Katie assumed it was the Bay of Biscay. It certainly looked like the same terrain she’d walked with Darío the other day. Sofia’s eyes took on a dream-like trance. “That is how it was with me and Darío’s father. He was older than I was, but still young. We were both so young. He was wild. Impetuous. I loved him deeply and he loved me. I would have done anything for him. Anything except give up my child.”

  Katie let out a gasp. Sofia glanced her way and then looked back at the painting. “It was different then, this was a very conservative place. Still is in some ways. My beloved wanted to get out, to see the world, he said this town was killing him, sucking him dry. It was, that’s true. He was the kind of spirit meant to roam.

  “He wanted me to go with him, and I was ready to. Sixteen years old and I was going to leave my mamá and papa and see the world with the boy I loved.” Her voice was wistful, it had a girl-like quality. Her eyes grew damp at the memories and Katie’s heart went out to the woman.

  “And then you got pregnant,” Katie prompted after a moment of silence.

  “Sî.”

  “And you had to choose. Have and keep your baby against everyone’s wishes, your family’s, your boyfriend’s. Or leave with the man you love. Without your child.” She didn’t elaborate, was not sure how Sofia’s parents and lover would go about taking her child from her. Whether they were talking abortion or adoption. She didn’t want to know.

  “It was no choice. Not really,” Sofia said.

  Darío came into his mother’s quarters for something to drink, parched from being in the intense sun for too many hours. He heard Katie and his mother in her livingroom and made his way there after getting himself some tea.

  Their voices were low, their cadence slow. Long pauses between hearing another voice. This was not a conversation about decorating or clothes or anything insubstantial.

  He should announce himself. Cough or something. But Darío kept still as he approached the room. He was behind the entranceway, couldn’t see the women, but could now hear them clearly.

  “It was no choice. Not really,” his mother said.

  He took a sip of tea, trying to figure out what they were talking about from that. He couldn’t.

  “No, of course not,” Katie said.

  “You will see, Katie, perhaps you already do, there is nothing a parent would not do for their child. No sacrifice they would not make.”

  “Even to give up the man you love?” Katie asked, but it didn’t sound like a question to Darío, more like a stated fact. He’d give anything to see her face right now, but he stayed in the alcove.

  Was she talking about Ron? Would she have told his mother about Ron? Darío didn’t think so, but what else could she be talking about? What other man had she had to give up for the sake of her child?

  “Yes. Even that. Especially that,” Darío’s mother said.

  “But that’s so unfair,” Katie said. Darío felt the wind knock out of him.

  “Sî.”

  “I’m so sorry, Sofia,” Katie said.

  Sorry for what? That she couldn’t love Sofia’s son? That she was still in love with another man? That life was so unfair as to finally give her a child while taking the man she loved?

  He could hear no more. Didn’t think he could take it. He stepped back a few paces, then cleared his throat and made a loud entrance into the room.

  “Darío,” his mother said. She looked at him with tender eyes, filled with compassion. Or pity?

  He looked at Katie who smiled softly then ducked her head. Guilt?

  He took a seat on a chair placed between the two of them.

  Sofia slapped her hands down on her lap. “So. Enough. When are you two thinking of marrying? We will have to start planning right away, eh?”

  “We’d hoped in the next few – ” Katie started.

  Darío interrupted her. “There is no hurry, Mamá.”

  Katie swung her head to him. Sofia motioned to Katie’s belly. “No hurry? Are you sure about that?” There was no censure in her voice, more like amusement.

  “If it is before or after the baby, it does not matter. The child will still bear my name.” He turned to Katie. “Is that not so?”

  She nodded. “Yes. Of course. But I thought we’d…” She looked at Sofia and stopped, obviously wanting to have this discussion without Darío’s mother in the room.

  Darío excused himself, saying he wanted to finish up practicing, that they’d talk about it later. He ignored Katie’s questioning look as he left the room.

  Instead of going outside, he made his way to the other side of the house, to his suite of rooms. He went into his office. Katie had been using the room as her work area since they’d arrived.

>   He went directly to her laptop case. It was against his nature to pry, but he could not stop himself. He looked in the main compartment. Laptop. Address book. Tablets with notes on story ideas. One of the side compartments held CDs and flash drives. Another held power cords and other electrical things.

  One side pocket remained. He fingered the wide zipper teeth. He finally grabbed the tab and pulled. There was only one thing in the pocket. A brown envelope.

  He knew what it was, he didn’t have to pull it out. But he did. From a legal firm. He pulled out the papers. The divorce papers. He flipped to the last page, knowing what he’d find.

  On the last page, about a third of the way down, Ron’s signature read firm and bold. Next to it was a blank.

  Katie hadn’t signed them.

  Chapter Twenty Two

  Golf is like a love affair. If you don’t take it seriously, it’s not fun.

  If you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.

  - Arnold Daly, author

  He was having second thoughts. He had to be. Katie could think of no other explanation for Darío not wanting to set a date. They had planned on getting married in Spain before going back to the States for the Tour Championship. That was now just two months away. If he wanted to be married by then, they’d surely have to start making plans soon.

  She looked over at him behind his desk, going over a contract his manager had sent that day from his club manufacturer. His head was bowed over the papers. Katie sat on the sofa in his office, reading. It was comfortable here, the two of them like this, just a quiet evening at home. Sofia was at some gathering in town, but even if she’d been home, they’d still be alone. Darío had been right, his mother never ventured over to this side of the house.

  They could easily turn the guestroom – the one Katie had foolishly spent their first night in Spain in – into the nursery. Katie would sell her house in Hancock and look for something on the water there. Maybe build. Darío had mentioned buying something in Florida or Arizona to use as a resting place between Tour events when traveling to the U.P. wouldn’t be feasible.