Former Rain-Forsaken Box Set

by Vanessa Miller

  “Kenneth, I -. Oh, what’s the use.” She balled her fist and looked around for something to smash. Finding nothing, she sank into one of the pews and buried her head.

  After what felt like an eternity of silence, Elizabeth heard Nina say, “Hey, there’s a party going on in the fellowship hall. Why are you in here moping?”

  Elizabeth looked up and gave Nina the best smile she could manage.

  Nina grabbed the tissue box on the window seal and sat down next to Elizabeth. She rubbed her back and handed her the tissue. “You’re supposed to be happy today. What’s wrong?”

  Elizabeth blew her nose. “Kenneth thinks I don’t trust him.”

  Nina kept rubbing her friend’s back. “Do you?”

  “Well of course I trust him. With most things – I mean, there are some things – well, you know what I mean.”

  “No, I don’t. Explain it to me.”

  Elizabeth gave Nina the evil eye. “Ooh, you make me sick sometimes.”

  “Yeah, I know, now answer the question. Do you trust your husband?”

  Elizabeth was silent.

  “Well?”

  “I trust him. All right?” She stood up and looked back at Nina. “I… I guess I’m just scared. Ah, who am I kidding, I’m scared to death – I keep thinking I’m going to lose him. Is it a crime to love somebody so much that you don’t want to lose them?”

  “Have you told Kenneth how you feel?”

  “No. How can I?”

  Nina stood up and grabbed Elizabeth’s hand. “You simply open your mouth and tell him,” she told her friend, then pulled her in the direction of the fellowship hall.

  Kenneth looked up as Elizabeth and Nina walked into the room. He smiled and pointed to the empty seat next to him.

  “I’ll talk to you later. I’m going to sit with Kenneth,” Elizabeth told Nina.

  “Keep your chin up.”

  “Yeah. Thanks.” She hugged Nina and sat down next to her husband.

  “Nina talked you into joining the celebration?”

  “No, Kenneth. I wanted to be here with you. Nobody would ever have to convince me to celebrate my husband. You are everything to me.”

  He leaned closer to her and whispered. “But do you trust me?”

  She looked into his eyes and saw his need for the truth. She heard Nina say, ‘Tell him.’ “Kenneth, I am learning to trust you more and more each day. It’s just that I’m so scared of losing you. I don’t know what I’d do if I had to live without you.”

  “Well, you can rest easy, babe. ‘Cause you’ll never lose me.”

  ***

  The celebration dinner was over and Nina was getting ready to walk out of the fellowship hall when she heard, “Nina, can I talk to you for a minute?”

  She inwardly groaned, but stopped anyway. She tried to put a smile on her face. Harold Bunsford was staring down at her like she was Peaches to his Herb. “Yes, Herb – I mean, Harold.”

  His smile grew wide. “I’ve got two tickets to the ballet. I was hoping you’d be interested.”

  A man who liked ballet, how refreshing, but Nina had resolved not to date just for the sake of dating. She had Donavan to think about, and besides, dating had long since lost its luster.

  Nina knew first hand that dating the wrong man could break a woman’s heart, and bring a lot of unnecessary trouble. “Thanks for asking, but I’m not interested.”

  Nina turned away from him. Her only thought was to find Donavan and leave the church as quickly as possible. Harold gently grabbed her arm and turned her back toward him. “Nina, what’s wrong? I’ve asked you out a dozen times. You keep saying ‘no’. Is there something wrong with me?”

  Nina looked at Harold. He wasn’t a bad looking man. He could use a little help bringing his wardrobe into the new millennium, but all in all, not a bad guy. He just wasn’t her guy. Nina couldn’t explain how she knew, she just did. And she didn’t feel like wasting precious hours on a date to discover what she already knew. “There’s nothing wrong with you, Harold. I’m just not interested. That’s all.”

  “Nina, I know at least five other guys at this church who have asked you out. You’ve turned them down also. Why?” His tone was not angry, just inquisitive.

  “Do you mind if we sit down for a moment?” Harold grabbed two chairs. People were filing out of the sanctuary. Nina and Harold waved their good byes to a few of them as they sat down to continue their conversation.

  “So why don’t you date?” Harold asked.

  “When I got saved almost four years ago, I told the Lord that I didn’t want to date.” She put up her hands to ward off Harold’s objections. “Believe me, I’ve had plenty of dates in my life. So, I asked the Lord to send my husband. He alone will I date.”

  Harold looked puzzled. “How will you know who your husband is, if you refuse to date?”

  Lord, how do I make him understand? Please give me the words to say. “I believe that God will bring him to me. My spirit will know that he is the one.”

  He lifted his hands in the air and shook his head. “I don’t understand, Nina. What are you looking for?”

  “Love.”

  He touched her cheek. “But, Nina. Surely you know that you could have love with me. If you would only give me a chance.”

  “Love is not as simple as you think, Harold.” She took his hand and stood up. “Come with me.” The fellowship hall and the sanctuary were nearly empty by now. The few remaining worshipers gave Nina and Harold nosey stares as they passed by.

  Nina ignored them. She and Harold stood in front of the baptismal pool. She pointed at the picture above the pool. “It’s Jesus on the cross. Nina, I see this picture every Sunday. What?”

  “This is the man I will marry,” Nina told him.

  “I hate to break it to you, but Jesus ain’t coming back in the flesh. And even if He did, I don’t think He would be interested in marriage.”

  Nina laughed. “Not Jesus, silly. I will marry a man who is dead to the things of this world; dead to his own will.” She looked up at the picture of Jesus on the cross and smiled. “Not my will, but Yours be done,” she said to no one in particular.

  “What?” Harold asked.

  Nina turned back to Harold. “Remember the prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane, when Jesus said, ‘Let this cup pass from me, but not my will, but your will be done.’ He was making a declaration that He would follow God, even if God’s will conflicted with His own. The man I’m going to marry will be submitted and obedient to God, even unto death. There’s no greater love.

  “And if he loves God that much, he can’t help but love and care for me as well. That’s what I want. It’s what I need.”

  Harold looked at her with a sad expression in his eyes. “The man you’re waiting on doesn’t exist,” he told her, then walked away.

  Nina stayed at the altar looking at Jesus on that cross for a while longer. “Oh, he exists. I don’t know where he is, but I trust You, Lord.”

  34

  Isaac stretched out on his bunk and started reading some more Bible mumbo-jumbo. Actually, he was still tripping off the last bit of hogwash he read in the fifth chapter of Matthews. Some mess about blessed are the punks and suckas, cause they will inherit a butt whuppin’. And blessed are the merciful, the reward for their good deeds will be a bullet in the head. Isaac remembered his dad saying, “Son, no good deed goes unpunished.” Ol’ usually-wrong, got that right, Isaac thought as he remembered giving a pocket full of money to a bum on the streets of Chicago. “Lot of good that did me.”

  If all that blessed mess wasn’t bad enough, further down the fifth chapter of Matthew he read:

  You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.

  But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

  “What?” Isaac sat up. “How can a man be held accountable for the thoughts in his mind? If he don’t touch the woman, wha
t difference does it make?”

  “Man, you arguing with that Bible again?”

  Isaac looked up as Pete walked in. “This crap don’t make no sense.”

  “Isaac, man, you cool people and all, but I can’t get involved with no blasphemy.”

  Isaac grabbed his Bible. “Okay, then listen to this:

  “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.

  But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.’”

  Isaac stared at Pete for a second, then said. “Now what cat up in here you think gon’ turn the other cheek? He’d get knocked out. And what’s this trash?” Isaac pointed at the offending words in the Bible. “If somebody takes your tunic, give him your cloak also. Well, why not give him your butt too? Cause that’s what’s next. You gon’ straight be some man’s woman up in this place.”

  Pete was silent. It was clear to Isaac that he was trying to think of something to say that would change his opinion, but couldn’t think of anything.

  “That’s what I thought,” Isaac said as he flung the Bible across the room. “You don’t agree with this mess either.”

  “Look, Isaac, I might not be able to explain everything in the Bible. I might not agree with everything I read.” Pete bent down and picked up the Bible and placed it on Isaac’s bunk. “But I’ve come to believe that the Bible holds the Word of God. And God is truth, so when I don’t accept something in the Bible, I pray about it and ask the Lord to increase my understanding in that area.”

  “Whatever, man.” Isaac got up, getting ready to walk out of the cell, when T-Bone stepped to him.

  He pointed at Isaac. “I want your spot, boy.”

  Isaac had this uncanny ability to be king of whatever jungle his was in. Put him on the streets and he’d run it like a superintendent. The inhabitant of his street kingdom would back up whenever he walked into a room and they would listen when he spoken as if he was E. F. Hutton giving out stock tips. Put him in prison, and even hardened criminals would bow down and pronounce him ruler. The ones that didn’t have the good since the Lord gave them would get dealt with.

  Isaac gave T-Bone a menacing stare-down and posed himself for business. “Come over here and take it, fool. Ain’t nothing between us but air and opportunity.”

  T-bone had a shard piece of glass in his hand. He tightened his hand around his weapon and advanced on Isaac.

  Pete moved out of the way.

  “T-bone, this ain’t your block. What are you doing over here?” A guard rushed to defuse the situation.

  T-bone turned to face the guard. He hid the glass in the palm of his hand. “Nothing. I’m just visiting my boy, Isaac.”

  The guard turned to Isaac. “You want his company?”

  Isaac thought about the shank in T-bone’s hand. “I can do without it.”

  “You heard the man,” the guard told T-bone. “Out.”

  “I’ll catch you later, man,” T-bone told Isaac as he moved out of his block.

  “Can’t wait.” Isaac turned back to Pete. “See what I mean. Turning the other cheek in this place will get you a toe tag.”

  “Did you see what he had in his hand?”

  “Sure did.” Isaac rubbed his chin. “Pete, you connected with somebody in the kitchen, right?”

  “Yeah, Big Joe.”

  “Tell Big Joe to make me a shank. I’m going to gut that fool and send him on to his just reward.”

  35

  “Say what?” Kenneth exploded.

  Elizabeth was at the kitchen table paying bills. The sound of her husband’s angry voice caused her to put down the checkbook and look up.

  “Yeah, well, you don’t have to worry. I’ll be there on the first plane smoking.” Kenneth slammed the phone down and looked at Elizabeth. “They think something’s wrong with my financial statements.”

  “Who does?”

  “Bank of America.” Kenneth flung his arms in the air. “Accused me of creative accounting. Can you believe that?”

  Elizabeth stared at Kenneth. “Now honey, you haven’t been cooking the books, have you?”

  “Elizabeth, this is not funny. My integrity is at stake here.”

  “Okay, you’re right. I’m sorry, honey.” She walked over to Kenneth and gave him a hug. “So when do you have to go to New York?”

  “Next week.”

  “Kenneth Underwood, you are not going to be in New York the week of our anniversary without me.”

  Kenneth kissed Elizabeth on her nose. “I wouldn’t dream of it, babe. Our anniversary is next Wednesday, right? Well, I’ve got to meet with Bob on Tuesday.” He pulled her closer to him. “I’ll handle my business, be out of that bank in no time flat – then take my beautiful wife on a 10th anniversary adventure in New York she’ll never forget.”

  “Sounds good to me.”

  Kenneth snapped his fingers. “I need to call Rick.”

  Elizabeth shook her head and handed Kenneth his briefcase. “No, baby, you go on to work. I’ll call your accountant. And believe you me, if he’s done anything funny with our money – I’ll make him wish he was still sucking his thumb and being serenaded by his Mama.”

  36

  Whether in his body or out of his body, Isaac did not know.

  But one thing was certain, he was definitely not in prison anymore. The blackness of this new place made him long for his three walls and government mandated iron bars.

  A man stood next to Isaac. He was clothed in vibrant and wondrous colors. Colors that were unlike anything Isaac had ever seen. A hood hung over his head, so Isaac could not ID him. “Who are you?” Isaac asked.

  The man looked at him. “I am Truth.”

  The air was gaseous and polluted, dry and tainted. Isaac put his hands up to his nostrils. “What’s that smell?”

  “It is the smell of decay, death, and dying. Come, let me show you.”

  As Isaac followed Truth he watched as a black slimy substance oozed down the walls of this – this – it had to be some type of deserted cave. Then he heard the screams. It was unlike any thing he’d ever heard. “What in the world?”

  “You’re not in the world right now,” Truth told him as he stretched forth his arms. “This is hell.”

  No dah, Isaac thought.

  Truth continued, “It is a place where lost souls are tormented day and night, minute by minute – forever. You seem to enjoy sending people here. I thought you might like a tour.”

  A little further into the tunnel and they came to an opening. The very essence of evil sprang forth. Rejected and tormented souls were encased in the walls of the tunnel, anguishing their misery as their silhouettes attempted to pierce through the muck and mire.

  Hundreds of menacing spirits stood, growling and snarling, waiting for their captain to unleash them on the world. The demons were of varied shapes and sizes. Some were as big as a grizzly bear with heads like bats and ten-inch fangs. Some were small and monkey-like, with big hairy arms. Still others had large heads, large ears and long jagged tails. The most dreadful of all were the smaller piranha-like imps. They infested their victims in swarms and gnawed at their flesh. The shadow of their leader swallowed the darkness as he towered over them. Green slime dripped from the tips of his flesh devouring fangs. He received his orders directly from Satan. It was his duty to send these evil spirits forth. He marched back and forth in front of his troops, preparing them for the battle to come. His beady eyes glared at his troops one last time, then with a shout, commanded, “Go!”

  The ominous beings flew up and out as the doors at the top of the belly of hell opened to spew these evil spirits out. Their captain continued shouting, “Destroy lives! Do evil! Confuse minds! Distort the truth! Go!”

  Isaac grabbed Truth’s arm. “Didn’t you hear them? They’re going to destroy the earth. Why aren’t you stopping them?”

  “The earth has been given to Satan. He that will be saved, let him
come to the Lord.”

  Truth took him into an area of hell that housed prison cells. It looked just like the cell Isaac was locked in every night. Same concrete floor, same iron bars, same filthy cot.

  Truth told him, “These prison cells are readily available for those that served Satan, rather than the Lord, when they walked the face of the earth.”

  “Why are we here? I could have stayed where I was if all you wanted me to see was some prison cells.”

  “There is much you need to see here.”

  A man tightly gripped the bars of his cell and started screaming, “Help – help me, please. Come on, Isaac. I know you hear me.”

  Isaac fixed his eyes toward the noise and saw a man in one of the cells. There was something familiar about the man. And that voice… Isaac stepped closer to the cell. “Leonard?”

  “Help me, man. Get me out of here. I can’t take it anymore.”

  Isaac smirked. “Why they got you in a cell? What’d you do – rob somebody down here too?”

  Leonard’s eyes rolled back in his head. He lifted his hand to his hair and pulled at it as gut-wrenching screams bellowed from his mouth. But it wasn’t Leonard’s mouth anymore. Leonard was transforming into a deformed animal right in front of Isaac.

  The creature reached out. “H-help me!”

  Isaac jumped back. This was too Poltergeist for him. “What’s happening?”

  Truth touched Isaac’s shoulder. “The drugs he sold while on earth caused people to become things they were never meant to be. As punishment, his body now changes form frequently. It will continue for eternity.” He sadly shook His head and moved Isaac away from the cells. “We have more to see.”

  Isaac was horrified. He had no wish to see more of this place and he told Truth so. Truth kept walking.

  “Where are we going?” Isaac inquired.