Purpose

by Andrew Q. Gordon

  “Your Purpose is stronger.” Ryan moved his hand in small circles over Will’s stomach. “You, the others, were right. It gets strength from the dead.”

  “Okay, how do you know that?”

  “I asked It where you got your strength from. It showed me the dead you avenged.” He shrugged. “Will, I know this isn’t exact, but when I come to the right conclusion it lets me know.”

  “How?”

  “The best way to describe it is, it feels like It’s smiling. Yeah, I know, I’m basing this all on a feeling, but I know when I’m right.”

  Much as he hated hearing it, he understood what trying to get answer from It felt like. “Sounds pretty much like how mine works.”

  “There’s one more thing. It calls to you, because I get my strength from you. For now—maybe for a while—I need you to protect me. Just like you said.”

  The last sentence had a sadness that tugged at him. “Don’t sound so upset. I thought I was good company.”

  “Oh, it’s not that.” He perked up, leaning over to kiss Will. “It just means I have to get up early and go with you for that damn early-morning exercise.”

  21

  “EIGHT… nine… ten.” He called out the numbers to encourage Ryan. The fitness trail along Rock Creek Park was mostly empty, perfect time to work out away from too many prying eyes. “C’mon, you got five more in you.”

  Ryan almost stopped halfway but completed the chin-up first. “Five more? Are you kidding me?”

  “Four now.” He flicked his wrist up, telling Ryan to get to it. “You’re definitely much stronger than the day we met.”

  A jogger ran past, turned to stare at Ryan as his body shook with the effort. He let go as if the bar burned his hand and turned to follow the jogger. “That guy thinks you’re hot.”

  “Actually, I think he thought, ‘I’d do them both,’ or did I get that wrong?” Will raised an eyebrow and stared at Ryan until he laughed.

  “Okay, so that is what he thought, but he was checking you out.”

  “Whatever.” Pointing to the bar, he added, “Three more to go.”

  Ignoring the groan, Will scanned the area for other joggers. Seeing none, he leapt up, grabbed the bar with his left hand, and joined Ryan for the last three chin-ups.

  “Show-off.”

  Will shrugged as he led them to the next station. “If your strength keeps increasing at the rate it is now, you’ll be able to do that soon enough.”

  “Will, how do we know I’m not weakening you by taking some of your strength?”

  They stopped by the slanted sit-up board. Waste of time. His abs were so strong now, he could do sit-ups all day and not tire. But they’d do them together.

  “I thought about that,” he said as they got in position facing each other. With Will matching Ryan’s movements, they started the first set. “As with a lot of this, I can’t be sure, but I don’t think you’re sapping my strength. I might not be getting stronger, or my growth rate may have stalled, but I don’t think a host backtracks.”

  Ryan paused at the top of his movement. “Really? What makes you think that?”

  “Keep working, slacker.”

  Ryan stuck his tongue out but returned to his reps.

  Ignoring the gesture, Will asked, “Which part were you asking about?”

  “Why don’t you think you’re getting stronger?”

  “The human body has a finite capacity—comic book superheroes notwithstanding. Muscles can only grow so strong, flesh and bones get but so hard. Everything has a limit. Eventually, you reach a level that you can’t go up from. I might be there already.”

  “Assuming your theory is right, why do you think you’ve reached that level?”

  Wonder if he knows we’re up to sixty already? “Just a hunch. Like I said, there’s no manual, like on a video game, that says, ‘When you reach this level, you’ve maxed out.’ All I can do is come to logical conclusions based on the facts.”

  “So you really don’t know.” Ryan was barely breathing hard. He was getting strength from somewhere.

  “No, not for sure. But I still don’t think you’re leeching my strength. You might be getting your increased abilities from me, but I suspect I’m more of a conduit than a source.” Pausing at the top of a rep, he smirked. “That was seventy-five. How many more do you want to do?”

  “Seventy….”

  “Six.” He watched Ryan’s face go from confused into a big grin. “Next time I’m going to make you hold a big rock.”

  “Don’t I get a say?” Despite the question, Ryan looked happy.

  “No.” Nodding, he moved them to the last station. “Did you feel the most recent call?”

  The smile drained from Ryan’s face. “Yes.”

  “I want you to stay in the apartment while I’m gone.”

  “Will….”

  He placed a finger on Ryan’s lips. “I can’t make you stay inside, but I would really feel better if you didn’t go out without me until we figure out exactly what is happening. You could use the time to talk to your Purpose. The more we learn, the better.”

  Pointing to the push-up board, he followed Ryan’s protesting eyes. “We’re not done talking about this.”

  “No, we’re not, but the rest can wait until you’ve done two hundred.”

  “Two hundred?” His head whipped around as his voice echoed off the hillside.

  “Be glad I’m not going to sit on your back.” If Ryan banged out two hundred push-ups, he might have to do something more drastic next time.

  Scowling, Ryan got in position. “Don’t think I’m going to forget what we were talking about.”

  Moving so he was squatting in front of Ryan, he flashed a big smile. “Never thought you would.”

  “GRIFFIN.” The voice held a sleepy edge.

  “Good morning, Detective.” Would their conversation go any better now that they’d met?

  “Ah, the almighty spirit of vengeance. Where’ve you been? Had to solve a murder all on my own on Saturday.”

  A hint of humor? That was a good sign. “Not all homicides involve the innocent. I don’t avenge drug dealers, thugs, or criminals who deserve their fate.”

  “Rather judgmental, aren’t you?”

  Definitely better than their last few chats. “Someone has to make the hard calls.”

  “Much as I enjoy your rapier wit, I’m busy, so can we cut to the chase?”

  Busy? The man had been sleeping. “There’s another killer I need to deal with. It happened in Suitland.”

  “Why tell me? Call PG County Police.” He sounded almost relieved.

  “The homicide occurred in Prince George’s County, but the killer and victim are from DC.”

  “Oh.”

  “Right.” He waited until he was sure Griffin understood the implication. “Any ideas how to coordinate this so I don’t have to kill him to bring him to justice?”

  “Justice? You going soft on me or something?”

  “Your humor is not appreciated, Detective. I’ve been doing things differently because you’ve shown yourself willing to work with me to achieve justice.” A lie, to be sure, but there was no harm in letting him think he’d had a hand in Gar’s change.

  “Thought you were the Spirit of Vengeance, not Justice.”

  The skeptical attitude was expected. “Sometimes the two can be the same.”

  He let the silence linger. Would the detective help or not? If justice kept his Purpose calm, he didn’t want to agitate Ryan’s by killing the guilty. He might need to later, but not without trying this first.

  “Okay, so what are you suggesting?”

  A smile creased his face. “We should meet. You can pick the place this time.”

  THE National Mall was crowded. The cherry blossoms were about to bloom, and tourists thronged the area. Griffin stood in an open space west of the Washington Monument. An interesting choice.

  A quick scan of the man’s thoughts told him he didn’t tell anyone wher
e he was going or who he was meeting. Still, Will kept the black device working and “told” people to ignore him. Just because Griffin didn’t betray him didn’t mean Barrington hadn’t followed the detective without him knowing it.

  “Nice choice, Detective.” His voice caused the man to jump.

  “Do you do that on purpose?” His eyes narrowed as he focused on Will.

  “No, just habit.” He shrugged. “I find it easier not to be seen. It lets me move around with less interference.”

  “So, I’m here. Talk.” Despite the words, he was almost excited.

  “Tell me what you need to get a search warrant. I’ll make sure the killer and the weapon are there when you arrive.”

  Griffin shook his head. “You know there are laws against this stuff. If it’s not legal for me to do it, I can’t ask someone else to break the law.”

  “I never said I was going to ‘break’ your precious law. If you tell me what you need, I can get the killer to talk to me, just like I did with Yester. I’ll leave my phone on, and you can record the conversation with the PG detectives. That should get you enough probable cause for the warrant.”

  Nodding slowly, Griffin looked up. “Okay, then what?”

  Standing still when people could see him made him uncomfortable. Motioning with his hand, they started to walk. “You do your police thing and lock him up.”

  “Better be a damn good confession. With no witnesses, it won’t be an easy case to win. Isn’t there something else you can do?”

  Will rolled his eyes. Even if he didn’t practice criminal law, he’d still been a lawyer once. “You mean like break the law?”

  Griffin smirked. “Never dream of asking you to do that.”

  “Don’t worry, Detective. Bring your counterparts, and I promise you’ll look like a superstar.” Embarrassing the man wouldn’t help him avoid killing the guilty.

  Rubbing his chin, Griffin couldn’t hide the smile. “Okay, when do you want to do this?”

  “Tell me what you need. Then arrange for a PG detective to join you, and I’ll get the information. After that, you’re on your own. Just remember that if you drop the ball, I’ll have to take action, my way.”

  Raising both hands, Griffin’s body stiffened a bit. “Hey, no need for threats. If you’re trying to bring a killer to justice, then we’re on the same side.”

  “Figure out what you need. Then call me.” Will shoved his hands in his pockets, telling Griffin’s mind he wasn’t there. Before he left, he said, “But don’t take too long. I won’t wait forever to resolve this.”

  KEEPING his breathing quiet, Will wondered if Ryan had learned how to use his enhanced hearing. Probably not. Instead of staying put and practicing his new skills like Will asked, Ryan had left the apartment.

  So much for understanding the danger he was in. It wasn’t like he’d asked Ryan to stay inside forever, just a few hours. A few hours Ryan had agreed to wait. Will even returned early so Ryan couldn’t use the excuse he got tired of waiting. No, he’d decided to ignore Will’s warnings.

  Probably why I’m upset.

  The elevator’s arrival caught his attention. Tuning out the other noises, he focused on the gait of the person getting out: Ryan’s. When Ryan paused just outside the door, Will knew he was listening for signs the apartment was occupied.

  “I’m here waiting for you,” he whispered. A sharp intake of breath let him know Ryan heard him. Will smiled despite his mood. At least he’d learned how to use his enhanced hearing.

  Even before the door opened, Will could smell coffee, not Starbucks. His smile disappeared. From the smell, he knew Ryan had gone to Jolt ’N Bolt, ten blocks away.

  “Shit.” Ryan’s heart rate increased, and his breathing became shallow as he turned the key.

  Staring at the blank wall, he didn’t look over when Ryan entered. He couldn’t decide if he was angry or hurt. Both.

  “Hey, Will, you’re back early.” The happy greeting sounded forced.

  “Thought I’d be nice and get back sooner to shorten the time you were waiting here for me.”

  Ryan slowly moved into his field of vision, sitting with his back against the wall. “You’re mad, aren’t you?”

  Was he? “I’m not sure.”

  “If you’re not mad, why won’t you look at me?”

  Meeting Ryan’s eyes, he realized it wasn’t anger or hurt, it was fear. “I’m not mad, just worried. I thought we agreed you’d wait for me?”

  He took a long sip, then gently placed the cup on the wood floor. “Actually, you told me to wait. I never agreed.”

  “Ha, so you’re the one who’s mad.” Shaking his head, he stood up and went into the kitchen. “Was it so terrible to wait a couple of hours for me?”

  “Going out for coffee—something we don’t have in the apartment, I might add—isn’t dangerous. It’s not like I’m chasing a killer in a bad part of town.”

  After filling a glass from the tap, he took a drink to keep his temper under control. Settled a bit, he sat next to Ryan. “We don’t know that yet.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “We don’t know what’s dangerous and what’s not for you.” His life had been so much easier when he didn’t care about anyone. “Until we know for sure….”

  “Will, you can’t expect me to stay in here forever.”

  He took Ryan’s hand and rubbed it gently. “I never suggested that. But you couldn’t go a few hours without coffee? A few hours you could have used to learn more about the abilities you have that will help keep you alive? That’s what I wanted you to work on while I was gone.”

  With his free hand, Ryan teased a thread on his jeans. Finally, he shrugged. “It’s hard to focus when you’re not here. You make it easier, not just because you tell me what to do, but also I know you’re not in danger. This”—he twirled his cup—“helps calm me.”

  “You don’t need to worry about me. I’ll be fine.”

  Ryan shifted, not letting go of Will’s hand. “And you don’t need to worry about me.”

  “Ryan, you’re not me.”

  “Not yet,” he said, his voice firm.

  “Not ever, if you’re not careful.” He closed his eyes and found his inner place to calm himself. When he opened them, he found Ryan staring at him.

  “Today, you said I was further along than you at the same stage.”

  “You can’t compare us. We’re not the same.”

  Ryan yanked his hand away. “What, I’m not as good as you?”

  “That’s not what I meant.” Their chat wasn’t going well. “First, we’ve already established our Purposes are different. If you’re not supposed to avenge people, maybe you don’t get the same skills I do. What if you don’t heal as well as I do? Or you’re not as hard to kill? We just don’t know yet.” He quickly held up his hands when it appeared Ryan wanted to respond. “Hold on, let me finish.”

  Waiting for the nod he knew he’d get, Will tried to find the right words. “The more important reason is I didn’t give a shit back then. I wanted to die when I chased down the guilty. David was dead, and I didn’t care about anything or anyone. If my death hurt someone, so what? All I wanted was an outlet for the pain. Can you say the same?”

  Ryan’s lips tightened until they nearly disappeared. After a moment, he shook his head. “No, I can’t. I don’t want to die, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

  “If something happened to you, it would hurt me.” More than he wanted to admit. “I’m not sure I could hold it together like I did after David, if you called that keeping sane.”

  Could he even go back to being Gar? Even if he could, he knew he didn’t want to. A pair of hands around his shoulders banished his thoughts.

  “Sorry, Will. Being host to… to… whatever complicates things. Not that I meant to be, but I was selfish. I didn’t think it through. In my mind, if you could go out and leave me worried, why should I sit at home just to make you happy?”

  “Ryan—”
/>   “No, Will, it’s okay.” He kissed the top of Will’s head.

  He stood and pulled Ryan to his feet. It was almost time to go. “So you’ll stay put while I go deal with the latest victim?”

  Eyes narrowed, Ryan sat back. “Can I come with you?”

  “No.” He turned his back and moved to the bedroom. He selected a black shirt and dark sweatshirt and tossed them on the bed.

  “Why not?” Ryan stopped in the doorway.

  “It’s dangerous, and you’re not ready yet.” He pulled the tight-fitting shirt over his head.

  Still in the doorway, Ryan continued to glare at him. “How do I learn if I always stay inside?”

  Will locked eyes with his boyfriend, then pulled the sweatshirt over his head. “No one said you had to stay inside forever, just a little longer. I’m not ready to bring you along. I need time to think it through first.”

  “There’s time to think it through on the way over.”

  “Ryan—”

  “No, Will, I’m serious. Do you know what it’s like, sitting home waiting for you to come back… hoping you’ll come back? And don’t give me that crap about you’re invulnerable. We both know you can die. I’m coming, so figure it out, fast.”

  His eyes narrowed, and he considered sending Ryan to sleep, but that wouldn’t solve the problem. “No, you’re not. This isn’t a grand adventure. Look, I know I was less prepared for my first mission than you are now, but this is different. I care about you, and I’ll do whatever’s necessary to keep you safe. That kind of distraction is a problem when I’m trying not to kill someone.”

  Extending his arms, Ryan blocked the door. “I don’t need protecting. I’m already stronger than normal people.”

  “This is still dangerous. There’s a reason most hosts didn’t live long after being chosen. I’m just luckier than the others. You testing your luck is not high on my list. So please, let it go. I promise I’ll work with you so you can come soon.”