Recklessly Ever After

by Heather Van Fleet

  “What is it?” Gavin asked, his gaze bouncing back and forth between me and the road.

  “Oh, I don’t know… Why don’t you ask Collin back there if he’s got any exciting news he’d like to share.”

  “Damn,” Collin groaned, shutting his eyes. “Addie just couldn’t wait, could she?” Still, I saw the smile on his lips.

  “Someone mind filling me in?” Gavin grumbled, obviously annoyed with the secrecy. His grip on my hand tightened a little, and I set my phone on my lap before reaching over to brush my fingers along the back of his wrist. He instantly relaxed…and I couldn’t help but grin wider, knowing I’d been the one to do that for him.

  In a way, I had power over Gavin, like he had power over me. And though I knew my confession could break that off in a heartbeat, I was selfish enough to enjoy that power for as long as I could.

  “The question you should be asking is who Mr. Collin back there is going to be picking for a best man.”

  “What the fuck?” Gavin barked.

  I laughed so loudly at the noise that I choked.

  He swerved the SUV, trying to reach in the back seat to swat at Collin’s knee, which made me laugh louder.

  “So, she finally said yes?” Gavin got the question out through his wide smile. His eyes were squinted, and the corners turned up just as much as his lips did.

  A truly happy Gavin was a stunning Gavin. The sight made my lungs squeeze.

  “Yup.” Collin smirked, not offering the details a girl needed to know about an engagement. I’d get them from Addie sooner or later, I supposed. This was Gavin and Collin’s moment.

  After dropping Collin off at the hospital to see Chloe, Gavin couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. Still, the last thing I expected was for him to ask if I’d be upset if he took me home.

  A tiny part of me didn’t want to be left alone, because if I were, the negative thoughts inside my head would start haunting me again. Still, I didn’t want to come across as clingy.

  “No problem. I’m probably going to take a nap or something.”

  He winked at me, so incredibly playful for the man I had begun to think ran on only two levels in life: sad or broody. “Good. Because I need the afternoon to get some things in order. But I’ll bring your car to pick you up tonight, unless you’ve got somewhere to be today.”

  In your arms is what I was stupidly thinking, but I immediately kicked that idea out of my head. God, what was wrong with me? One night in his bed, and it was Pisser Paul syndrome all over again.

  Before I could contemplate what he was thinking when he looked at me—what could happen if I let him in the way I had sworn not to let another man in again—I needed to tell him the truth about the baby.

  “Kenna.” He squeezed my hand again. “You good with this? Because I can come inside for a little while if you want me to.”

  I nodded, turning away so he wouldn’t see the tears forming in my eyes. I had no idea why I was even crying. Hormones? Guilt? Fear?

  Letting go of my fingers, he moved his hand to my leg. “Six okay tonight?” he asked, his thumb resting against my inner thigh, stroking.

  Again, I nodded, just as he pulled into the lot of my apartment complex.

  A few kids were outside, running to the small playground on the back of the grounds. A woman followed behind, hair plastered to her face and a flustered toddler flailing in her arms. I’d never seen her before, but I suddenly wanted to watch her, study her. Learn from her.

  “You okay?” Gavin squeezed my thigh and I squeaked, jumping in place.

  “Shit, I’m ticklish. Don’t do that.” I giggled, momentarily forgetting why I was upset.

  “Yeah?” One dark eyebrow rose, and a teasing smile tugged up the side of his mouth. “Good to know.”

  “Um, I don’t like to be tickled.” I pursed my lips. “Why would you need to know that when any further tickling could end with a junk-punch?”

  Gavin dropped his head back against the seat. “Trust me, if I tickle you…” He licked his lips. “You’ll be begging me to never stop.”

  I sucked in a breath, my fear of his tickling gone. In its place was curiosity, paired with desire and an undeniable warmth growing between my thighs. My already sensitive nipples tingled against my bra, and I secretly hoped we could start the tickle game right there in his car.

  Apparently, pregnancy did weird things to my already active libido.

  Gavin’s smirk faded into heat when he looked down at my chest. I squeezed my thighs together, trapping his hand in, totally not thinking about what it meant, just needing him to ease the building pressure, the ache that had been in place for weeks now. I’d missed this—missed what he could do for me.

  And I was done waiting.

  Forgetting all my internal battles, I lost myself to his touch, urging his hand up higher. “Please.” I shut my eyes, using the side of his palm to rub against the seam of my shorts.

  “I’ll take care of you.” The edge of his palm slipped to where I craved it most, the calloused base just catching my zipper. “But you have to promise me you won’t run.” He applied a little pressure, just enough to send a flash of heat through my belly. “I need more than just this from you.”

  I tipped my head back, refusing to think of the consequences to my answer before it slipped out. His coercion was everything I’d been denying myself.

  “Yes, okay, yes. Anything.”

  He moved his hand away, and I reopened my eyes on a protesting gasp. “What are you…”

  The driver’s side door opened and shut in a flash. Throat dry, I watched him run around the front of his SUV, bopping the hood of his Suburban just once. He popped up on my side, a wide grin on his face through my window. I shook my head, grinning as my door opened with a bang.

  “In a hurry?” I teased, regardless of my own urges.

  “Up.” He nodded at me with his chin.

  “Up?” I squirmed in my seat, needing him to get back in here and finish what he’d started.

  “I won’t do this in broad daylight with you. The last thing I want is for a few random kids to freak out if they hear a woman screaming from my truck.”

  “Who says I’ll scream?” My lips twitched. “You must have some serious confidence in your skills if that’s the—”

  He cut me off with his lips, his hand at the nape of my neck, his mouth overpowering mine. As I rose to my feet, our chests were crushed together. Gavin kissed me with the sort of strength that had me sinking into him and all he had to offer.

  I curled my fingers in his long hair as the delicious sting of his beard rubbed my cheeks almost raw. With his tongue, he begged for entrance, pushing aside my lips with a feral growl.

  My mind whirled with sensations, needs, wants. Hard and powerful, that’s how this man kissed me—as if he could coax the orgasm out of my body with his talented mouth alone. Before I could beg for what I needed again, his hands were on my ass, yanking me hard against his erection with a low groan. “You seem to forget about our night together.”

  I smiled against his mouth. “I remember everything about that night.”

  The way he’d felt inside me.

  The way he’d pulled at my hair when he fucked me briefly from behind.

  And the thing I remembered the most? How sore my throat had been in the morning when I woke. Because yes, I’d screamed really loud that night.

  And it had everything to do with Gavin’s ability to fuck me.

  “Hmm” was his only response. Again, the man of few words.

  Giggling to myself, I latched my legs around his waist and kissed his cheek, then his ear, only to squeak when he pinched my ass.

  “Where are your keys?” he asked as he walked me toward the front of my apartment, not letting me go. Not even pausing to catch his breath, other than when he spoke.

  “They�
��re in my pocket.” I sighed, then leaned my forehead against his shoulder. One part of me was embarrassed because another person walked by, but the other part wished he’d just given me what I needed in his SUV.

  “Well, fuck.”

  I laughed again, but it fast turned into a moan as he slowly undid my legs from around his body and let me slide down the front of his hardness. My breasts ached from loss of contact with his chest when he nudged me away to dig in my pockets. Thankfully, it lasted only a few seconds.

  He quickly unlocked the building’s door, only stopping to hike me up around his waist again. “I like you like this.”

  I shuddered as fingers crept beneath the line of my shorts. “Like what?”

  “Against me.” He nuzzled his nose against my cheek, then kissed me gently there. Intimate and sweet—nothing like the broody man I’d come to know.

  As he carried me down the hall, the cold air from inside the complex brushed against the back of my neck. I shivered, tightening my arms around his neck.

  Sensing my discomfort, he stroked a heavy hand up and down my spine. “Apartment number one-seventeen, right?”

  I nodded, my body suddenly too heavy and lax for words. I was already sated in his arms, a comfort I hadn’t felt from a man—or even another human—in so long.

  I counted fifteen steps before we arrived in front of my apartment door. He’d gone quiet again, as had I, neither of us saying a word when he unlocked my door and shoved it open. Five long steps after that, we were in my kitchen—Gavin placing me on the edge of the counter, merciless toward my poor, unsuspecting dishes.

  Several plates fell to the floor with a crash, shattering over his shoes. “Shit.” He stumbled back a bit, eyes narrowed at the mess. He looked so much like a guilty, little boy, his eyes filled with fear and sadness as they shifted from the floor to my face. “I’m sorry.”

  I touched his cheek, not giving a damn about a set of garage-sale dishes. “It’s fine.”

  He shut his eyes, blew out a breath, then nodded, moving a step closer again. “I’ll buy you new ones.”

  I shrugged, then reached for the button of my shorts. “Or you can pay me back in other ways.”

  He grinned, leaning over me, only to reach the button first. “So demanding.”

  I arched my back, allowing him the access he needed to get the shorts off. “Needy is what I am.”

  His grin was smug as he dropped to his knees between my bare thighs. “As you should be.”

  With gentle hands, he pressed his palms to my knees, then slipped them up and over my thighs. At the edge of my panties, he stopped, eyes flaring, breaths ragged at the same time. I looked down, frowning.

  “Everything…okay?” I gulped, suddenly remembering the truth as I took in the small bulge just above my pubic bone. He couldn’t tell that I was pregnant, this I knew, but Jesus, I could. My belly wasn’t flat anymore. It was like I’d overeaten during a meal.

  “Better than okay.” His eyes flashed up at me as he slowly slid the panties down my leg. Mischief lit the green, and I shuddered for a different reason all together. Then with a teasing grin still on his face, he whispered, “Now’s the time when you say ‘please,’ beautiful.”

  Chapter 15

  Gavin

  I kissed the inside of her knee, wondering how one woman could wind me up so tightly. All I wanted was to sink inside her, but Kenna needed to be shown how good a man could be to her first. If we had sex again, there’d be no way for me to get inside her heart. And that was my end goal.

  “Gavin.” She moaned my name as though she was on the verge of breaking, and I’d yet to get to the good stuff. I moved my lips higher and higher, until her legs were propped over my shoulders and my nose was buried against her pussy. I inhaled and shut my eyes. “Tell me yes. Tell me I can taste you.”

  “God, Gavin, please. Do it now.”

  The first dip of my tongue had her arching her back. By the time I parted her folds with my fingers, she was scissoring my neck with her knees, both thighs going tight around my head.

  I loved every fucking minute of the pain.

  She gripped the edges of the counter as though she was scared of falling, her chest rising and falling with heavy pants. Wanting her to feel secure, safe, I lowered one hand under her ass, then squeezed.

  “Fuck yes,” she whispered, the dirty mouth I remembered from the first night we’d spent together coming back like lighting in a storm.

  I groaned. Every time she moved, I went faster. I had a reaction to go along with every one of her actions, so in tune with her body that I didn’t ever want to stop. She moved one of her hands to grip my hair, tugging me closer, smothering me against her. I could hardly breathe, but that’s exactly what I wanted.

  Removing my hand from her ass, I pushed it around front, splaying it over her stomach. For a half second, while my palm settled over her belly button, she froze—locked down, really. Thinking I’d messed up, I pulled my hand away and dropped it to my side, only for her to arch her pussy harder against my mouth.

  Just the thought of upsetting her had my nails digging into my palms, my tongue moving faster, my lips sucking harder. I wouldn’t hurt her. Physically, emotionally, anyway. I wanted her to feel good. I wanted her to remember this. Love this as much as I did.

  She cried out my name, just as her legs shook beside my ears. “Oh my God, oh my God, Gavin, yes…” And just like last time, she came hard on a scream.

  I nuzzled my nose against her clit, savoring the taste of her on my tongue, just in time for her to finally relax.

  She covered her eyes with an arm, head tipped back. “Jesus, St. James.”

  “You okay?” I smiled when she nodded.

  “More than okay.” She propped herself up on both elbows and looked up at me when I stood. Thighs parted, pussy bare, she looked the way any gorgeous, sated woman should look after a good orgasm: fucking beautiful.

  “Yeah?” I leaned down to grab her panties, helping her slip them up and over her legs. “I must be damn good at getting you off, then.”

  When I reached for her shorts, she shook her head and stood, wrapping her arms around my waist. “Thank you.”

  I froze for a second, not used to the affection. Then when I realized she wasn’t going to pull away, I shut my eyes, savoring the rare moment. “For what?”

  “For…being here.”

  I hated the hesitation in her voice, needed to see her face, to know what she was thinking, more than anything. McKenna was a hard person to read, which wasn’t good for a guy who didn’t take cues well.

  “Hey.” I pulled back and pressed my hands to her cheeks. Her soft eyes met mine, glistening with tears. “What’s wrong?”

  She quickly shook her head and tugged on her shorts. “Nothing. I’m just tired. Didn’t get much sleep last night.” She sniffled, and my back stiffened.

  “But you’re crying.”

  “Am not.”

  “Liar.”

  She shoved at my chest playfully, but I only moved back enough to see her face again. “It’s just been a while, is all.”

  “A while since you last had an orgasm?”

  “At least that way.” Her cheeks turned pink.

  “So…you laugh when someone is hurting or in pain, yet you cry when something feels good.” I rubbed her chin, holding her face with my other palm. “You are pretty much the weirdest, most wonderful woman I know.”

  She rolled her eyes and grabbed my hand—the one against her cheek. “And you have things to do, remember?” She tugged me to the door behind her, her ass so fucking gorgeous in those shorts that I wanted to fall to my knees and worship it. Hell, I wanted to worship every inch of this woman. But I needed to earn something first: her trust.

  I knew I couldn’t do that by continually pushing for more when she was obviously scared of commitment. That
mean meant I needed to do this her way—and mine.

  Compromise the best way I knew how.

  She turned the handle on the door, and this time, I didn’t fight her about leaving. “Six. Be ready.” I leaned over and kissed her cheek, lingering for a minute when she reached forward to grab the bottom of my tee. She held me close, her fingers tight on the fabric. It was as though her head was fighting her heart about something.

  Before she could decide which part of her body she wanted to side with, I turned and made the decision for her by walking out the door. I knew she was watching me walk away though—could almost feel her eyes burning into the back of my head.

  I could only imagine the thoughts running through her mind.

  * * *

  McKenna

  Holy crap. I’m falling for my baby’s daddy.

  Those were the first thoughts that hit me as soon as I shut the door to my apartment and leaned back against the wood. I had either lost my mind or was on the verge of losing it, because there was no way in hell I could possibly be falling for this guy already.

  I barely knew him.

  Well, that’d be a tiny lie, because I did know him, rather well actually. Not just from firsthand experience, but from Addie too.

  Gavin’s so quiet.

  Gavin’s so protective.

  Gavin’s so smart.

  Gavin, Gavin, Gavin.

  Blah, blah, blah.

  “Ugh.” I flopped onto the couch, internally cursing the voice of my best friend. She might have known Gavin from a friend’s point of view. But had she ever stayed up half the night talking to the guy? Had she ever kissed him or held his hand? Had she ever looked into his eyes and realized that she wasn’t alone in the world after all?

  “Of course not. That’d be me.” I covered my face with my palms, wanting to scream or cry or throw something. Yet my dishes were already cracked and on the floor, and I couldn’t find the energy to pick them up—let alone toss them.

  Thinking maybe I needed a reminder about all things bad relationships, I headed to my room, reaching for the Forbidden Box of Shame at the top of my closet. If there ever was a time to encourage myself not to feel something for a man, this was it. Gavin was a great guy, as far as I could tell. In fact, I knew his perfect woman was somewhere out there. Someone patient and caring. Someone loving, who wouldn’t run every time he gave her an extraordinary orgasm. Someone who would make him happy in a way I could not.