Strawberry Wine

by Darly Jamison

  The bed dipped under his weight, and he pressed his forehead to mine. “Do you have any idea how I feel about you?” he whispered. The heat of his breath brushed against my lips.

  Turning him into the bed, I straddled his hips, our mouths never once leaving each other. Leisurely, I moved lower, letting my tongue glide across his skin, the sharp angle of his jaw, down his neck until finally I lingered on the defined arcs of his chest. As my hands slid against his ribs, the sounds of his breath became ragged and broken. I moved lower, lower, until my mouth closed around him, tasting him the way he’d tasted me.

  A moan escaped from his throat and his hands tangled in my hair and never in my life had I ever felt so aware, aware of myself, of the man I was with. When our lips met again so did our bodies and we moved together, deeply, precisely, tangling in the sheets, as if we’d known each other our whole lives. And it was even more perfect than the first time, better than all the times rolled into one. The thunder growled outside as our bodies released, our skin damp with sweat. For a long while I lay against his shoulder, our fingers entwined, talking and laughing, and after one more round, we both fell asleep.

  * * *

  A familiar noise woke me up. First I heard it in my sleep, far away like a dream, until its persistent ring broke through the darkness. I sat up in bed, clutching the sheets to my chest. A feeling of unease curled in my stomach when I realized it was my cell phone. I held my breath until the ringing stopped, but after my sigh of relief it started again.

  With the thin sheet wrapped around me, I made my way to where Jake’s blazer was lying on the floor. I picked it up and pulled my clutch from the pocket, then set the jacket down on the bed. My fingers were shaking as they maneuvered around the zipper, easing it open to reveal my phone. I removed it from the satin confines and looked at the display screen.

  Christopher.

  My heart rate kicked up a notch as I stared at his name, willing it to go away.

  “You’d better get that.”

  Startled, I glanced at him. Jake was sitting up in bed, his dark hair messy with sleep and sex. My breath exhaled sharply and I looked back at my cell. I closed my eyes as I accepted the call.

  “Hello? Addy?”

  When my eyes fluttered back open, my gaze locked with Jake’s. A thick layer of guilt swept over me, threatening to steal the air from my lungs. “Hello.” A prickle of panic raced along my veins.

  “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you. Are you all right?”

  He’d been trying to get a hold of me? How many times had he called? “I’m sorry,” I said, thinking fast. “I guess I had the ringer turned off.”

  He sounded relieved. “I’m glad that’s all it was. I was starting to get worried. It’s not like you to not return phone calls. How did the funeral go? Did your family get the flower arrangement I sent? I was hoping it would arrive in time, but I was late ordering it.”

  The flower arrangement? What flower arrangement? I had no clue. “Yes, we did get it. It was beautiful,” I lied. “Thank you, Christopher.” At the mention of his name, I looked back at Jake. He was watching me closely with dark eyes, the corner of his lips turned down.

  “On the bright side, Mrs. Davenport is doing better. A lot better. I thought we might lose her there for a little while.” He paused, waiting for me to respond, but I couldn’t. “Anyway, I’ll be there in the morning to pick you up. I hope you don’t mind. There’s a staff meeting in the afternoon I’d like to get back for. Will you be ready?”

  I had almost forgotten he was picking me up. “Actually, that won’t be necessary,” I said slowly. “I’m driving home with Ruby.”

  Christopher missed a beat. “You don’t want me to pick you up? Is everything all right?”

  “No, everything’s not all right.” I took a deep breath. “Christopher, we need to talk.”

  My words were met by a moment of uncomfortable silence. “We need to talk, yet you don’t want me to come get you? Addy, that doesn’t make any sense. If I pick you up we can talk on the way home. I’ll be there at seven.”

  “I said no. I don’t want you to come.” My lashes lowered with guilt. “I’ll call you when I get back into Atlanta.” I ended the call, not waiting for a response. I couldn’t look at Jake. Not yet. My eyes flickered to the bedside clock. Ten o’clock? Where had the time gone?

  “Do you have to leave?” Jake asked after a minute, the sound of regret thick in his voice.

  Our eyes met for a brief moment before I turned away. “I probably should.”

  Quietly we dressed. The air in the room seemed to have been sucked out and replaced with a thick, dense smog. My movements felt slow and heavy as if they were weighted down. And I suppose they were. Weighted down with guilt, confusion, and regret.

  “I’m sorry,” I said finally, standing in front of Jake. We stared at each for a long moment before he responded.

  “I understand. This isn’t your fault.”

  I let out a bitter laugh. “Just like ten years ago when you said it wasn’t my fault? Even though it was?”

  “That was different.” He sighed. “We were kids then and you were scared.”

  My heart thumped wildly, beating against the walls of my chest. “I’m scared now.”

  Jake stepped toward me and then stopped himself. “I’m the one who should be sorry. I shouldn’t have let it get this far. I knew better. I knew you were engaged, yet I still allowed it to happen. It was selfish of me.”

  “We both knew better.” I looked away, not wanting to see the pain in his eyes. “I guess history does have a way of repeating itself.” Suddenly, a small box caught my eye. It was lying at the foot of the bed, underneath his jacket. Reaching down, I grasped the soft burgundy velvet. “Is it yours?” I asked, thankful for the distraction. “I think it fell out of your jacket.”

  Jake shook his head and sat down on the bed. “It’s not mine. It’s yours.”

  I crinkled my eyebrows. Mine? I knew it wasn’t mine. I’d never seen it before in my life.

  “Go ahead,” he said. “Open it.”

  Swallowing hard, I lifted the hinged top and my breath caught in my throat. I glanced back at Jake and studied him carefully, trying to make sense of the unexpected surprise.

  “That afternoon we spent together at my aunt and uncle’s house . . . right after the Strawberry Festival, when we shared the bottle of wine,” he explained in a soft voice. I knew what he was getting at. “Afterward, I went back to the fair and walked around for a while, trying to clear my head. I knew I was in trouble. I hadn’t meant to fall in love with you, that wasn’t part of the plan, but I couldn’t help myself. It was unavoidable. It was fate . . .” His voice trailed off, thick with emotion.

  I sat down next to him. “Jake—I’m so sorry, I—”

  “It’s okay, Addison. Please, you don’t have to apologize again,” he interrupted, holding up his hand. “I’ve already told you I understand why you did what you did. I get it,” he offered gently, nodding. “Anyway, I found this and it made me think of you. I wanted you to remember our summer together and how much fun we had, regardless of how it would all end. I wanted to give you something to prove I really did love you.”

  Tears pooled in my eyes as I looked back at the velvet box. I couldn’t believe it. It was hands down the most thoughtful gift I had ever received. I swallowed back a sob and tried to regain my composure. “I don’t know what to say,” I whispered, not trusting the sound of my voice. My eyes met his. “Why didn’t you give it to me?”

  “I didn’t have the chance. The next time we were together, you broke things off. It didn’t seem like the appropriate thing to do.”

  “Kind of like what’s happening now?”

  “No, this time I want you to have it. It was always meant for you, no matter how things turned out.”

  “But, Jake—are you sure?” I asked, trying to read his expression.

  Jake reached over and gently took the box from my hands. “Turn around.”r />
  Without another word, I turned my back toward him, lifting my hair. He fastened the delicate silver chain around my neck. I swiveled back to face him, my heart breaking. “Thank you.” I reached over and gave him a tight hug, barely able to believe the romantic gesture. After he released me I looked down, carefully lifting the small strawberry charm. “Jake, it’s perfect. But why did you bring it with you now? How did you know?”

  He gave me a small smile. “I didn’t know, but I brought it anyway, just in case. It was always meant for you. It never belonged to me.” Jake’s gaze latched onto mine, a thick veil of emotion in his eyes. “I’ve always loved you. I never stopped.”

  A giant, uncomfortable lump formed in my throat, making it impossible to swallow. “I love you, too. I really do. I’ve never met anyone like you before. And under different circumstances—” Christopher’s face danced in front of me as if he were there.

  “Shhh, I know.” He enveloped me in his arms as tears spilled down my cheeks in long, hot trails. “It’s just not our time. Maybe our time was that summer, and that’s all it was meant to be.”

  I nodded against his chest, not knowing what to believe. If our time was only meant to be that summer, why did I feel so sad? His hand moved through my hair in long, comforting strokes, soothing me until my tears subsided.

  “I will always love you, Addison, no matter what. And I don’t blame you for anything. No matter where life takes us, I will always remember you and what we had together.” Very gently, Jake planted a kiss on my forehead, one on the tip of my nose, and then finally on my mouth, his lips brushing against mine carefully. “Come on. Let’s get you home.”

  Epilogue

  “Hey, Addy—are you all right?” Ruby asked, bringing me back to the wedding boutique.

  I took a deep breath. “I’m fine.” Shaking my head, I tried to clear away the attack of emotions. I glanced around the shop, hoping no one was watching me make a fool of myself.

  She hung up the trumpet silhouette she’d been admiring and turned to face me. “It’s not every day a girl gets married. Believe me, I know how stressful it can be,” she said with a sympathetic smile. “But you’re happy, right?” Ruby’s gaze latched onto mine and her serious tone caught me off guard.

  I gave her a smile and nodded, not trusting myself to speak just yet. I took another deep breath, biding my time. “You of all people should know how happy I am,” I reminded her. “I’m getting married to the man I’m meant to be with. I’ve never been this happy in my life.”

  Ruby’s eyes misted over. “Then why do you look so unsure?”

  I shrugged my shoulders, my thoughts slipping back into the past. “I was just thinking about life and everything that’s happened up until this point.” I tried to explain. “You know, it’s funny. No matter how carefully we plan our lives, there always seems to be a fork in the road—”

  “Throwing everything off course,” she offered, softly finishing my sentence. Ruby smiled and enveloped me in a tight hug.

  She knew exactly what I meant.

  When we pulled away, she gave me another smile before holding up a different dress for inspection. I shook my head. Turning back toward the wedding gowns, I began leafing through them, memories of Jake and the past still clouding my thoughts.

  My eyes scanned the row of wedding gowns, finally resting on one dress in particular. Bringing my hand up to it, I let my fingers trail along the beaded bodice, appreciating its simple elegance. With its feminine, off-the-shoulder neckline and stunning Chantilly lace detail, it had a glamorous vintage feel to it I simply could not resist. I had to remind myself to breathe. Gingerly, I lifted it from its place and held it up for Ruby to see.

  “Oh, Addy!” she gasped, bringing her fingers to her mouth. “It’s perfect.” Embracing me once more, Ruby whispered, “Mags would be so happy.”

  My voice caught in my throat. I knew she was right.

  When she stepped back, her eyes glistened with fresh tears. “I’m so happy. But I still can’t believe you live so far away.” Ruby forced a chuckle, trying to keep herself from crying again. “You’re a terrible friend, you know that?”

  I smiled and reached out to touch her arm. “I miss you, too. But I promise we’ll see each other as often as we can.”

  Ruby nodded and turned away, dabbing discreetly at her eyes. They say the first trimester of pregnancy can make the mother-to-be very emotional, but Ruby wore it well.

  I looked down at the beautiful garment lying in my arms and slowly walked over to the full-length mirror positioned in the center of the boutique. My breath caught as I held the wedding dress up against myself in the reflection. It was as if it had been made for me. Just like Jake.

  The next several months were a blur of preparations and excitement, counting down the days until I would marry the man of my dreams. Much to Ruby’s dismay, Jake and I decided on a ceremony less elaborate than what she’d had in mind, something that fit us both perfectly. We would be married in Lakeside, a sunset wedding on my grandparents’ farm where we’d first met. Our families were elated, and somehow I knew Mags was, too. Come hell or high water, she would be present—if only in spirit.

  And she was there, I felt her all around us as my father walked me down the makeshift aisle sprinkled with rose petals. Layers of satin followed behind me as I made my way toward the altar positioned near the edge of the pond.

  Mom eyed the red leather boots peeking out from under my dress and shook her head, but her smile told me she accepted my decision. What other shoes could I possibly wear? And Jake had never looked so handsome and happy as he did in his tailored black tux, his dark hair tumbling seductively over his forehead.

  Before our loved ones, we promised to cherish each other until death did us part. Then with God as our witness, we sealed our vows with a kiss. I looked into the crowd of beloved faces and knew that moment would be one of the happiest and most memorable of my entire life.

  As the fireflies fluttered around us, lighting up the night with their beacons of light, Jake and I shared our first dance as husband and wife. But it was him, Jake, who made the moment so amazing, more amazing than anything I had ever dreamed possible. He was what I had been searching for my entire life. Our connection was unbreakable, and no matter what happened in the future I knew he would always be by my side. Finally, he was mine and I was his, the way it was always meant to be.

  An endless sea of stars made their way across the darkened sky as a string quartet carried on throughout the evening, playing one beautiful note after the next.

  My parents danced together arm in arm, the happiness on their faces unlike anything I had ever witnessed before. And even Gramps was having fun, smiling and laughing with his friends and family gathered around him. I knew he missed Mags more than anything in the world, but he had learned to live again. He really was the strong, capable man my grandmother always said he was.

  “Addy, someone wants to say good night.” Jake and I turned to the tiny, sweet face nestled in Ruby’s arms, and I felt my heart swell. “We couldn’t say good-bye without visiting Mya’s godparents first. She’d never let us live it down.” I looked into my best friend’s eyes, the joy of motherhood shining brightly within them.

  I gathered the delicate bundle and cradled her in my grasp, admiring the porcelain hue of her skin and pucker of her tiny rosebud lips. “She’s too young to play the guilt card.” I giggled softly and kissed the top of my goddaughter’s silky blond head, her intoxicating fragrance causing my stomach to stir.

  Ruby beamed proudly. “Five weeks old today.”

  “But you should hear her once she gets going,” Tommy Matthews exclaimed, never once taking his eyes off his wife and new baby girl. “My prediction is she’ll be giving Ruby a run for her money before too long.”

  Playfully, Ruby nudged him with her elbow before turning back to me. “Next will be your turn, Addy. You need to make me a godmother. And Mya needs a best friend.”

  I felt Jake’s arm
tighten around my waist. Tilting my head up, I caught his gaze and held it, our happy secret bubbling up inside me. It had only been two weeks since the pregnancy test read positive, and we still couldn’t believe it. The news hadn’t been expected, but we both agreed it was the most wonderful wedding present we would ever receive.

  Jake smiled, the dimple in his cheek peeking out. “All in due time.” He dragged his eyes away from mine and looked at our friends. “But don’t worry. You two will be the first to find out.”

  “We better be.” Ruby gathered the sleeping baby in her arms and handed her over to Tommy, then tucked a soft pink blanket around her. “It’s bad enough you lured my best friend to Texas. You can’t take that away from me, too.” She laughed and threw him a wink.

  “I have to say, this is one of the nicest weddings I’ve ever been to.” Tommy adjusted Mya in his arms and looked around in appreciation. “I can’t believe the transformation of the farm. It’s really amazing.”

  With narrowed eyes, Ruby looked around with appreciation at the clusters of candles and fireflies as they blinked all around us. “Not exactly what I had in mind, but I have to admit . . . it’s perfect. Just like you two.” She grinned, the glow from the flames reflecting in her eyes. “I love you both so much. You know that, right? And I’m so happy you’re finally together. It’s been such a long time coming.”

  “Too long.” Jake pulled me closer and planted a kiss on my forehead.

  “Thank you, Ruby.” In a rush of emotion I collected my best friend in my arms. “For everything. For helping me with the wedding, for always being there for me. I love you.” Tears pressed against the backs of my eyes and I struggled to keep them from escaping. “You’re more than my friend, you’re my sister.”