More of You: A Confessions of the Heart Stand-Alone Novel

by Jackson, A. L.

  He set his palm on her jaw. “You make me feel like maybe I can.”

  Sending her a soft smile, he grabbed the small pocketknife he carried from his back pocket and stepped around her, cutting one of the roses at the base of its stem.

  He rolled it between his fingers, could feel the weight of her gaze burning at the side of his face.

  “I think you’re all wrong, Faith. You are the most beautiful thing in this place. I look at these flowers, and I think of you. Maybe it’s you who believed in them enough, you willed them to grow.”

  Her teeth raked across her bottom lip, so much affection in her voice that Jace shook. “Would that be such a bad thing? Everyone needs someone to believe in them.”

  Her face pinched, and the confession came out. “I love you, Jace. I believe in you. I trust you. Maybe that’s the only thing that matters.”

  He nearly crumbled at her feet.

  “You are beauty, Faith.”

  The epitome of it.

  Inside and out.

  He couldn’t help the bitterness from filling his tone. “And I’m exactly like that beast in that story. Everyone saw she was too good for him, and he fell in love with her anyway.”

  Soft laughter rippled from between her lips. “What are you talkin’ about? You’re the most gorgeous boy I’ve ever seen. You walk the school halls, and every girl you pass swoons.”

  He took her hand, pressed her palm to his thundering chest. “All my ugly is on the inside.”

  “No . . . you just don’t see yourself for who you are.”

  “Or maybe you’re just seeing what you want to see.”

  She let her gaze sweep off to the side, to the house that sat like a massive shadow covering them. “Well, I guess it’s a good thing we have this haunted castle to keep us company, then.”

  He wrapped an arm around her waist and tucked her close, swaying her around in the moonlight. She chewed at her lip, peeking up at him, something playful on her face.

  “You think you aren’t goin’ anywhere, Jace Jacobs? Well, I’m not goin’ anywhere, either. I’m goin’ to stay right here in this very spot. I told you one day I was going to own this place.”

  He brushed back the hair that’d fallen in her face, cupping her by the cheek, the anger and fear that had lined his voice turning light. “You gonna let me stay right here with you?”

  “Mm-hmm.” Something shy and sweet took hold of her expression. “You and me. We’ll buy this place. Fix it up together. Run it together. Make something of it while we make something of ourselves.”

  He spun them around, hugging her closer, their hearts beating in time as he joked, “Beauty and the beast and their haunted castle?”

  “That’s right . . . except this castle is gonna be a bed and breakfast,” she said all cute and resolute.

  Dreams. That was the thing about them. It didn’t matter if they were impossible or not. And Jace? He wanted to dream with her.

  Chase it with her.

  “What if I scare all the guests away?” he teased.

  “Never . . . you’re too good to look at. I’m pretty sure once the word gets around, you’re going to be what brings in the crowds. At least the ladies.”

  He shook his head. “We’re going to have to save a couple of those rooms for my brother and my cousin.”

  “That’s just fine. They’re your family. And I like them. They’re sweet.”

  Sweet.

  Yeah, right.

  Jace smiled, though there was a ripple of possessiveness behind it. “Joseph has a crush on you.”

  Faith swatted at him. “Oh, he does not.”

  “You really are blind, aren’t you?” There was a smile at the corner of his mouth, nothing hard in the words.

  “If seeing this place as ours is blind, then so be it.”

  “Hmm . . .” he mused. “Beauty’s Bed and Breakfast. Come stay at the BBB.”

  A small giggle rippled up Faith’s throat. “For someone who thinks he’s so tough, that is the cheesiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

  “What?” His mouth dropped open in feigned offense. “You don’t like it? Come on, Faith. This has to happen.”

  She giggled a little more, a blush rushing to her face, her teeth tucking her bottom lip in a tight clamp.

  And Jace let himself dream. What it might be like to get to stay there with her.

  Forever.

  The mood shifted around them, that intensity, the powerful energy he felt every time he was around her gliding through the damp, humid air.

  He stared down at her as she tipped her face up to look at him, the moon all around her.

  He touched her face. “Beauty,” he murmured.

  A wistful smile played around Faith’s mouth. “Beast.”

  Jace couldn’t take it any longer.

  He took her mouth.

  Her lips so soft.

  Her tongue so sweet.

  And they danced and they kissed and he let his arms roam down her sides.

  Over her breasts.

  Faith moaned and shuddered.

  And he laid her down on the grass, hovering over her, wanting to sink inside.

  But knowing he had to be careful.

  That he didn’t want to taint beauty. Not when it had finally been offered into the protection of his hand.

  Faith looked up at him.

  Those eyes so trusting.

  Jace let himself lay down over her, molding his body to hers, his kisses deep as he rocked against her.

  Faith kicked her head back, gasping for air, and Jace kissed down the column of her neck.

  Delicate fingers found their way into his hair. “Why’s it you feel so good? Just like this, our clothes still on?”

  The threat of a smile pulled at one side of Jace’s mouth, and he moved to whisper in her ear. “Maybe that’s because we really do belong together.”

  “Jace,” she whimpered, and the only thing Jace wanted was to love her. Hold her. Take care of her.

  He kissed her softly. Tenderly. And he sucked in a breath when he let his hand slide under her dress.

  She tensed, whispered, “Be careful with me, Jace.”

  He dipped down, murmured at her lips. “Always.”

  He touched her.

  Carefully.

  Holding himself in restraint because he refused to hurt this girl. Ruin her in any way.

  Her fingers dug into his shoulders when she came apart, and he captured her mouth, captured her cries.

  And he knew that he’d always hold her high.

  * * *

  “Oh my gosh, look.” Faith grinned up at him where her hand was wrapped up in his, the other pointed at the stuffed Belle and Beast dolls strung up over the ridiculous carnival game that was set up so no one could win. “There we are,” she teased, squeezing his hand.

  He grinned right back, loving that she was at his side. Out in the open. That she wanted to claim him every bit as much as he wanted to claim her.

  He hauled her toward it. “I guess I’ll have to win it, won’t I?”

  Faith giggled. “Um . . . those games are impossible.”

  “I thought you told me if you wanted something badly enough, believed in it enough, you could have it?”

  Her brows lifted, a sweet blush on her cheeks, affection on her face. “I do like the sound of that.”

  He was grinning when he stepped up and pulled the five dollars out of his pocket. So maybe he should be saving it. Buying something to eat for his brother and cousin, but if he ever wanted to be good enough for Faith, he had to step out, believe that he could, just like she’d said.

  The carnie gave him the balls. He had three chances to knock all the pins down.

  He took one ball, closed his eyes, and didn’t even open them as he sent the ball sailing.

  He just believed.

  He heard a crash and a clatter, and then Faith was clapping beside him, jumping up and down, and shouting, “Oh, my goodness, Jace. You did it! You did it!”

/>   Jace’s eyes popped open, and he was grinning, and then he was kissing her hard right in the middle of the fair.

  “Which one do you want?” the carnie asked.

  Faith looked him straight on. “I want the Beast.”

  Twenty

  Faith

  I peeled my eyes open against the grogginess still pulling me under. Banging echoed from somewhere outside, the clatter of noises and the lift of voices dragging me from a deep sleep.

  It was funny how now that Jace had been staying with us for the last three weeks, the only thing I’d wanted to do was sleep.

  It was as if my body and soul were catching up. Given reprieve in the safety that his presence afforded, the months of sleepless nights soothed away as if I were being rocked in the security of his arms.

  During that time, I’d grown accustomed to the sound of him getting to work each morning.

  But this morning?

  Something had changed.

  A riot of energy sizzled through the rays of light, as if they were rising with the sun.

  Scrubbing a hand over my face to break away the sleepiness, I rolled out of bed and moved for the window. I pulled back the drapes and peered out.

  What in the world?

  There had to be ten cars parked in front of the house.

  I quickly dressed and raced downstairs, jerking open the front door only to stumble in my steps when I saw what was happening.

  “Well, if it isn’t Sleeping Beauty,” Courtney said as she lifted her head and cocked a teasing, accusing eye at me from where she was on her knees on the porch, ripping out a plank.

  “Hi?” That single word cracked in my throat like a question while I slowly scanned the area. Almost the entire front porch had been ripped out, all thanks to an army of family and friends who had shown up.

  Courtney and Felix.

  Mack and a few other guys I recognized from the station.

  My cousins, Tyler and Shane.

  My heart tumbled a little when my gaze moved off to the left where I saw Ian, Jace’s brother, unloading a bunch of supplies from the bed of a truck.

  He’d never exactly been my biggest fan. He’d watched me with suspicion as if he thought I might be the one to pluck his brother from his grasp. As if I might steal him away.

  As if Ian could ever, for a single second, become less important to Jace.

  I wondered if he knew that was impossible. Jace would have done absolutely anything to provide for him.

  Protect him.

  It made me wonder what their relationship had been like over the past ten years.

  That time was an empty gap between us. During those years, I’d been sure I’d never really known Jace at all, the boy I’d thought I’d spent my life with nothing but callous and cruel when he’d walked away.

  But I wasn’t so blind and broken not to realize that the two of them had their own histories written in that time.

  No doubt, enduring their own hardships, even if on the outside, it looked as if the two of them had risen to the top without any effort at all.

  I was pretty sure the lines creased into the corners of Jace’s eyes contradicted that impression. The strain etched there. Years of worry and his own grief.

  Was it wrong that I wondered its source? That I even cared at all?

  But each day, I only cared more.

  Because I could feel Jace’s torment.

  Could feel it radiating through the walls, seemingly becoming greater with each day that passed and we still had no new clues or answers.

  It was hard, coming to terms with the fact the boy I’d fallen for, so fast and hard all those years ago, might be right there, standing in front of me.

  Hidden behind that same harsh exterior he’d worn then. It terrified me that I was sure I could still see beneath those fortified layers. That I could stretch my hand out, sink my fingers into that kind, kind heart, know him from the inside out.

  It sure didn’t help the confusion that the man was kneeling in front of my daughter and securing a tiny, children’s work-belt around her waist.

  Bailey was clearly buzzin’ with excitement that she got to help.

  Oh goodness.

  My hand went to my throat, the emotion coming too fast. It was amazing that I didn’t crumble beneath the pressure of them all.

  Sorrow and affection and a million reservations.

  I tore my attention from them and looked back at my best friend. At least she was safe.

  “What’s going on?”

  Courtney smirked. “What does it look like? We’re out here working our tails off while you’re upstairs sleeping half the day away. A little help would be nice.”

  Felix laughed beside her, giving a shove to her shoulder and teasing, “Such a ball buster.”

  Her grin grew, taunting him, “You have no idea.”

  His brows lifted, and his voice dropped. “Oh, I think I do.”

  “Mornin’, Faith,” Mack called as he tossed some old, rotted wood onto the growing pile.

  He’d checked in with me often, coming by to ensure we felt safe, and made sure other officers were driving by, constantly surveilling the property.

  But standing there this morning? He was nothing but an old friend. Someone who cared about me and my daughter.

  “Mornin’,” I managed through the awe, trying to catch up to what was happening outside my home, as I realized why they were there.

  They all knew I needed the help. That I was feelin’ so alone and helpless and scared.

  And they’d all shown up here to help me. To be here in the surest show of support.

  Gratefulness surged, filling my insides like a buoy. A promise that they weren’t going to let me drown.

  I looked at Mack. “Who put you all up to this?”

  Mack laughed as if it were a ridiculous question.

  Instinctively, my attention traveled back to Jace, who’d pushed to his feet. The man was wearing a tight white tee and a pair of tattered jeans that teased my mind into thinking wicked things.

  It didn’t matter how guilty those thoughts made me feel. How wrong they might be.

  I couldn’t stop them.

  The attraction that flared in the bright morning light. The energy that flashed when he cast those eyes in my direction.

  Standing there as if he owned the place.

  Looking better than any man had the right to.

  For the last three weeks, he’d been taking stock.

  Making lists of what needed to be achieved and the different projects that needed to be tackled.

  Not to mention the fact that he paced, watching out the windows, continually ready to step in and protect Bailey and me if anything threatened us.

  Sometimes I wondered if he had manifested from the walls. As if he’d been there all along, waiting to be awakened, summoned back into existence.

  There to tease and taunt me with ideas I couldn’t keep out of my mind.

  He started my way.

  The air shivered.

  The ground shook.

  Oh goodness.

  I was gettin’ in deep. Feeling things I shouldn’t.

  Couldn’t.

  My mind continually traipsing through the memories of what we’d once been and what we’d once hoped to be, stirring them up, tendrils of them trying to crawl up through the dirt where they’d been buried and take root.

  Blossom.

  Just like those roses that had once been forgotten but had come to flourish.

  But that was an impossibility.

  As he approached, Jace sent me the softest smile, and still, somehow, it was lined with the fierceness of the man.

  A quiver took to my entire body.

  Impossible, I tried to remind myself.

  Right?

  God, I just didn’t know anything anymore.

  I shook myself off and returned the easiest smile I could manage with nerves whipping through me as strong as a tree trying to stand its ground in the middle of a hurrica
ne.

  “Tell me you didn’t drag everyone I know here before dawn to make them work all Saturday.”

  No doubt he was responsible.

  “Now why would I go and do something like that?”

  Something playful pulled at the corner of Jace’s mouth, something soft that I’d seen coming from him more often over the last week.

  Something that twisted through me, made a place inside me glow that should have been forever dimmed.

  Bailey’s eyes went wide when she finally noticed me. She raced to catch up to him and then started to trot along at his side. “Surprise, Mommy! We pwans the whole big secret. Jace said we a team.”

  Emotion crashed in my chest. “This is quite the surprise, Button.”

  “You wike it?” she asked. “We gonna fix evwy’fing.” She threw her arms up, bouncing a step.

  “Yeah, Button, I like it.”

  Loved it so much.

  Only I wasn’t looking at her when I said it because it was getting harder and harder to look away from the man standing in front of me.

  * * *

  “How’d he manage to put you up to this?” I asked as I situated a bunch of glasses on the tray next to a pitcher full of fresh lemonade.

  Courtney took the knife she was using to cut the watermelon and used it to slide all the diced pieces into a bowl, cutting me a glance as she did.

  “Um . . . didn’t take a whole lot of convincin’ considering all of this is for you and Button. I mean . . . all of those cards and flowers you got after Joseph died?”

  She studied me. “How many people said to let them know what they could do to help you? But if anyone knew you, they would have known you weren’t gonna ask for a thing. You needed someone who would step in and actually take action. Someone who saw a need and could figure out a way to make it happen.”

  I peeked out the big window off the kitchen where everyone was starting to gather.

  My breath left me when Jace, Ian, and Mack rounded the corner and climbed the rickety porch steps.

  They had peeled their drenched shirts from their bodies, sweat gathered across their heated skin, and all three of them looked like a little taste of sin.

  My stomach tightened.