by Gwen Cole
A strong gust of wind blows and Jack dances to the side, more skittish of the wind than I’ve ever seen. He pulls against the reins and his ears twitch. It’s almost like—
I turn around seconds too late.
A hand covers my mouth and my arm is twisted behind my back. I fight with everything in me, trying to get free. I’m able to hook my leg behind their knee and we both go down. I hit hard and roll away from my attacker, trying to get my legs beneath me so I can run.
Something hard hits the back of my head and I go down again. My face presses into the dirt and everything spins so fast I don’t know which way is up. I’m afraid to close my eyes and give in to the darkness beckoning me.
Someone flips me onto my back, and instead of seeing the gray sky, four people stare down, their faces hidden behind black cloth.
The edge of my vision goes dark and I shut out the world.
I’m giving in and hate every second of it.
25.
Seph
Avery isn’t behind me.
I happened to glance back when she fell behind, and now we’ve come over a rise and she isn’t anywhere. I stop Cade and spin him around, riding back from where we came. The wind is only getting stronger and the dust is making it harder to see.
I stop when I see movement on the rise. First I see Jack, then a second later I realize Avery isn’t in the saddle. Nobody is. The horse trots to us, wanting something familiar, but my eyes search everywhere. Seeing nothing but the windblown dirt.
Finn and Rami ride up behind me.
“What’s going—” Then Finn sees Jack, riderless. “Where’s Avery?” his voice demands and he pulls down his bandana. “Seph, where’s Avery?”
I yank my goggles and bandana down, not able to breathe. “I don’t know,” I snap back.
I kick Cade forward and follow Jack’s tracks down the slight hill, where there are more than just his tracks. A lot more. I jump off Cade and kneel, trying to grasp how many there were.
I feel Finn behind me, watching.
My eyes search for clues. I stand and walk over to where there was a struggle, about a half dozen different shoe prints. I need to know what direction they went in, but the wind is making it harder by the second.
Rain starts to fall from the sky. In a matter of minutes, any evidence here will be gone.
“Shit.”
I follow the tracks faster until they head south in a straight line. I look up but see nothing on the horizon. The rain makes it hard to see, but I know they’re already long gone. I turn and face Finn. Rami stands behind him with the horses.
Finn breathes heavily, looking to me for answers. He was mad a moment ago, but now that the truth has set in and Avery isn’t here, he’s crumbling. Not knowing what to do.
“We’re going to get her back,” I say. Finn nods, trying to hold himself together. “Whoever took her went south, but with the rain, we won’t have any tracks to follow.”
Rami looks up from the ground, his eyes a little less crazy than usual. “Are you sure you wanna do this?” he asks. “You don’t know these people like I do.”
Then for less than an instant, I see a flash of fear. He hides it quick because he knows how, but now I know a piece of his past he never would have told me. Maybe the very thing that made him the way he is.
I leave Finn standing where he is and approach Rami.
He avoids my eyes.
“Then you know them better than I do,” I tell him. “Help me get her back, Rami. Please.”
His jaw clenches and unclenches, and after what seems forever, he looks up. “I’ll help you find them, but I can’t promise much else.”
“Then tell me what to do.”
Rami swallows and eyes the tracks, which are disappearing with every drop. “We need to go back to that town,” he says. “There’s no way in hell it’s coincidence they live this close to them. I’ve seen them do it before—they feed a town and the town tells them when travelers come through. Both benefit from the agreement and the townspeople get to live. We have go back to that shop owner.”
“And then what?” Finn asks.
Rami flashes a grin. “Then we make him tell us where they are.”
The rain stops before we reach the town. The horses are covered in mud up to their stomachs and our clothes are drenched. It’s Cade’s instinct to slow down before entering a town, but I nudge his sides to keep going.
Unlike last time, people don’t stand outside. I see their faces in the windows, hiding from the storm and maybe us. It’s a town ruled by fear. We don’t stop until we reach the store. I jump off Cade and Finn stays with the horses this time, leaving Rami and me to do the dirty work.
I unholster my gun and kick the door open.
The shop owner drops a screwdriver at the sight of us, his eyes wide and his mouth not smiling like before. His straggly hair sticks up and he’s still wearing an old bow tie. I should have known from how happy he was to see us that something was wrong.
Townies are never happy to see outlaws.
“Wha—what do you want?” he asks, backing away toward the counter.
Rami breezes past me and stops the man with a knife to his side. He gets close to his face and says, “You know what it feels like to drown in your own blood, little man?”
“Rami—”
He looks back, gives me a smile, and moves behind the man so he has nowhere to go. The man might be nervous, but I’m nervous for him, too. I still remember what it’s like to be on the wrong side of Rami.
I stare at the older man, wanting him to fear me as much as he should. We didn’t come this far just to be separated again. He knows where Avery is and we need to get to her fast.
“A friend of ours was taken a little while ago,” I tell him. “And we need you to tell us where we can find her.”
He fakes confusion too late. Maybe he could have fooled someone else. Not me.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The man shakes his head.
“No … I think you do.” I step forward and stare until he doesn’t have a choice but to look at me. “You don’t have to die today,” I say. “Just tell me where they are. Or my friend will have no problem showing you what he promised.”
Another flash of fear crosses his face. His jaw trembles when he opens it, and he manages to say, “You don’t want to find them. It’s better to leave your friend and escape with your lives while you still have them.”
“What I want to do and don’t want to do is my business. All you have to do is tell me where to find them.”
Rami shifts behind him, maybe hinting with his knife where I can’t see. “Southwest of here,” he says. “Not far.”
I meet Rami’s eyes and nod my head toward the door. He hesitates, wanting to kill the shop owner. That’s the only life he’s known, and I can’t help think back to the first day we met. Those people he killed, whose bodies he left under the bridge. I can see him struggling with the change of habit.
“Rami—” His eyes flicker between me and the shopkeeper, fighting with himself. “He isn’t the one you want to kill.”
After a little while, he lets out a breath and walks past me out the door. I give the shop owner one last look and follow him. Finn is still on his horse, not saying a word and his face void of emotion. Jack stands behind us with an empty saddle and my heart aches to see it.
“It’s going to be dark soon,” Rami says. He glances at Finn and gives me a pointed look. One that finishes his thought by saying, We have to go before it’s too late.
I give him a nod.
Finn stares at the ground with his jaw tight.
“Finn.” He looks up. “We’re going to get her back,” I say, trying my best to reassure him.
“And if it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t have to.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You know what it means. You were riding with her, and it’s your fault you didn’t notice when she fell behind.” His fists tig
hten around the reins. “You should’ve been there.”
I want to pull him off that horse and show him a side of me he hasn’t seen yet. To make my fists bloody and make him take back his words. But I don’t. Instead, my finger taps against my leg and I take a breath before I respond.
“Let me know if you feel the same once the day is over.”
I pull myself onto Cade and we take off down the road. It’s his choice if he wants to follow.
Rami comes up beside us and we take the horses into a new gear. Cade wants to go faster, but the Lawmen horses won’t be able to keep up if I let him. I glance back only once to see Finn, making sure he’s with us.
After a few miles, we come across a dirt road heading south. It’s well used and Rami nods to confirm my thoughts. We follow it and the wind picks up again, drying our damp clothes.
At the point between dusk and night, we slow and stare at the lights flickering on the horizon. A few large shapes of buildings darken the sky against the clouds.
This has to be it.
There’s an old silo nearby and I lead us over to it and dismount.
“So what’s the plan?” Rami asks.
Inside, I’m relieved—I wasn’t sure if Rami would help me. Either way, I’m going, but now the odds are better with him.
“Me and you are going in on foot and doing whatever we have to to get Avery. Finn?” He reluctantly looks at me. “You’re going to stay here with the horses, and when you hear the first shot, wait a few minutes, and then haul ass to get us.”
“I’m not coming with you?” he dismounts, coming over. “I can shoot.”
“I know you can,” I say. “But have you ever killed anyone?” Finn hesitates. “Exactly. You won’t do Avery any good by dying. If we don’t come out alive, at least she’ll have you.”
He seems to believe me and nods, not having the energy to argue. I need him out of the way. He won’t do any good if he can’t shoot anyone.
I buckle an ammo belt around my waist and untie the lever-action holster from the saddle to lie across my back in case I need it. Rami has his pistol and knife strapped to his belt. He motions me to the side before we head out, leaving Finn with the horses.
“I still remember how we met,” he says, “and I know how you feel about killing. But these people aren’t like the others. I need you to know I have every intention of killing all of them.”
I manage to smile. “I think today is a good day for rule breaking.”
“Does this mean I get to see you kill someone?” He smiles.
I look at the darkening horizon and know Avery is there somewhere, possibly hurt and about to be worse. I remember every single person I’ve ever killed. All six of them. And I wish there was some way around this.
But I should know I can’t live in this world without turning into the person I never wanted to be. It’s not giving me a choice.
“Let’s go get ’em,” I say.
We take off at a jog.
The night swallows us and the only beacon is the fire up ahead. Leading us to a place we don’t want to go.
26.
Avery
I wake when my body is dropped on the ground. My eyes don’t want to open all the way and my head throbs. Everything is dark except for the bright light of a fire nearby, blinding me when I look at it. There’s a pair of horse hooves near my head, and I can only hope they don’t step on me.
A hand grabs the back of my shirt and drags me away. My boots make lines in the dirt but I can’t make my legs work, let alone my arms. I can barely think straight. The person drags me into the dark and then through a wide doorway of a barn.
The squeak of a metal door hurts my ears and they throw me inside a room with bars and lock the door. I try to push myself up, but my arms are too weak and something keeps my wrists together.
I take a second to breathe, in and out until the pounding in my head lessens, then I push myself into a sitting position with my eyes closed to keep the world from turning, my wrists locked together with a pair of metal cuffs. After a couple minutes, I crack my eyes open. The dizziness is gone now but nothing else has changed.
Other people are in here with me—huddled in the corner like maybe they’ll be forgotten if they’re hard to see. Five total, not including myself. The barn doors are left open, and there’s a large fire burning close enough for me to smell the smoke. Close enough for them to keep an eye on us. There’re only a few of them out there, keeping warm by the flames.
The sky is dark. The last thing I remember is the dust storm and Jack being spooked by something. An hour or two must have passed from then until now. I tuck my hands into my legs to keep them from shaking, but the cold seeps deeper with every minute.
Another hour or so passes and I haven’t moved. Through the barn door, I can see the men around the fire, drinking but not yet drunk. They laugh and make gestures with their hands, telling stories I don’t want to hear. I’m staring into nothing, trying not to think much to keep the nerves down, when I hear a voice I never thought I’d hear again. My head snaps up and so do the others, recognizing him as I do.
The two men around the fire stand, the smiles now gone from their faces.
“Donald wants another one,” a man says, somewhere out of view. He joins those by the fire with another man next to him—shorter and older by the way he holds himself. The one whose voice I recognized.
“Does he have a preference this time?” But he says it like a joke.
“Just go and get one.”
The two men start toward the barn, but the man—someone who must be in charge—calls out again. “And bring the one you brought in tonight. I want to get a look at her.”
Even though I want to, I can’t move. My heart pounds unevenly against my chest, begging me to move.
I want to wake up and have this all be a dream. Seph and I would still be riding side by side and he would finally tell me what he’s looking for. Getting to know Seph might be the only good thing coming out of all this, but I would do it all over again and not change a thing, even what’s about to happen now.
The two outlaws come inside the barn and open the cell door. They go for a man in the corner, who tries to plead with them, begging them to let him go. Even in the dark and without being able to see him, I know he’s crying.
The last time I saw a grown man cry was almost a year ago when Mr. Santana’s son died in the mine. It was December and it was cold, snow settling in our hair. He stood there for hours while the other miners tried to get to him. And when they did, it was too late.
One of them grabs my arm and hauls me to my feet, shoving the thoughts of home a long ways from here. I don’t fight him because I can’t. I’m staring fear in the eye and can barely make my legs work properly. We walk out of the barn. I can see my breath.
The man is dragged away toward one of the nearby buildings—a one-level with a large sliding door. It’s only cracked open, enough to fit a person through, letting light into the night. The man starts to fight the closer they get. I force myself to look away, trying to ignore his pleas even when there’s nothing else to fill the air.
The outlaw clings to my arm and we face the man I hoped to never see again. He doesn’t recognize me at first, but when something clicks, he pushes past the younger man to get a better look.
“Well if it isn’t the girlie who broke my window and stole my rifle,” Levi says. He steps closer and I can smell his breath—worse than my horse’s breath has ever been. “To be fully honest, I never thought I would see you again.”
The man behind him says, “This is the girl you were telling me about?”
“Sure is,” he says. “I sent Reynolds and his crew after her, but they never came back.”
My braid hangs over my shoulder and Levi touches the end of it. I try to swallow, but it’s hard. I want to vomit, or cry, or maybe both at once.
I don’t know how my legs are keeping me upright.
“Guess your luck ran out, didn’t it?”
he asks.
I take a shallow breath and say, “The night isn’t over yet.”
He laughs once, and then again, finally backing away. “You’ll want to get rid of this one fast, Johnson,” Levi says to the man next to him. “She’s nothing but trouble.”
“I don’t know,” Johnson says, staring at me. “Maybe I’ll keep her around for morale.”
Levi laughs again, but it’s cut off when a gunshot echoes somewhere nearby. We listen for another one, and it comes exactly ten seconds later. People shout and more shots disrupt the night.
Another goes off behind the barn, in the opposite direction, and Levi grabs my arm, pushing the younger outlaw out of the way. “Go see what’s going on.”
“But—”
“Go.”
He runs off in the direction of the first shots, and the moment he’s gone, three more follow. There’s more shouting not far off, and Johnson pulls out his own pistol the closer they get. The only light comes from the fire and the building where the other prisoner disappeared into, masking the rest of the world around us in black. My eyes search but see nothing. My breathing is less than shallow.
Then everything goes silent. No shouting and no gunshots. Just the night pressing in around us. There’s a click of a gun behind me and I look down to see one in Levi’s hand. The old man can barely see but I’ll bet my life he can shoot.
Johnson takes one step forward toward the dark, unsure, and then commits. He’s three steps from the edge of the light when a shot goes off, close enough to make me jump. Johnson falls, his body already limp when he hits the ground, his head making a sickening thump.
Someone steps from the shadows with a pistol in their hand, which is hanging at their side. His head is bent, looking down at Johnson, and then Seph looks up at me and it’s like I don’t know him. His eyes are hard and there’s blood splattered across his shirt and neck.
Seph’s gun hangs loose and I feel Levi’s pressed against my head—the metal barrel cold as the death it’ll carry. But Seph doesn’t seem to care, like he doesn’t even see it. He walks toward us without a thought, no hesitation.
