Black Hills Rebel

by A. C. Wilson

  “We all say things we don’t mean, honey. Lord knows I’ve said my fair share with your father, but it always turns out all right in the end.” Lacey soothed over the phone. Nora quickly wiped the tear from her cheek.

  “I meant it. I don’t think I can stay married to a man I’m not in love with. There might be someone else too.” Nora sniffed and realized she was letting her mother into a coil of fear. It was like bearing the heart to a sword tip without the benefit of armor.

  This is uncharted territory. Watch where you go.

  “I had my suspicions.” Lacey sounded sad and Nora felt a new wave of disappointment.

  “Was it really that obvious?” Nora asked, sitting down on the edge of her bed. Her suitcase half packed for her trip to Deadwood with Colt.

  “You and Randy are rarely together. You’ve only been married less than two years and I’ve never seen you touch him. Whenever you show him any affection, it is always forced as if you’re doing it because you know someone is watching. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist, my love.” Lacey was completely right. A newly married couple would be all over each other. There was no hand holding, secret kisses, and shared meaningful looks. Things, if Nora were honest, that she wanted desperately.

  “I’ve tried so hard not to disappoint anyone Mom, and now it feels like it doesn’t matter. It all fell apart anyway.” Nora caught a sharp sob and fell back onto the bed. She stared up at the ceiling of her bedroom and watched the fan’s blades whirl around. Deeply she took a breath to find some calm.

  “You have never been a disappointment, Nora. You’re head strong and very trying at times, but that’s who you are. I just could never figure out how to show you that life cannot always follow your plan. Sometimes you have to take it on faith that all things will work out in their own time. The harder you try to force them into your pretty little mold, will only cause you more stress.” Lacey’s voice was soothing, even if her daughter didn’t completely agree with all of the logic. Just knowing she wasn’t a screw-up was something of a relief.

  “How will I know if I’m doing the right thing? What if I destroy any hope of happiness just to end up alone?” Nora’s mind was wandering further into a mire of self-doubt. It had always been there like a birth mark that won’t wash off. Each step she took was tentative at best. It was a far cry from the do-things-my-way attitude she was famous for throwing around.

  “Sadly hindsight is twenty-twenty, Nora. Besides the right thing is in the eye of the beholder. Only you will know if what you chose to do was right.” Lacey hadn’t exactly lessened the ache in Nora’s heart, but she had offered some clarity.

  “Well I should probably pack up and get on the road. I really don’t want to be driving in the dark.” Nora sighed as she sat up on the edge of her bed. She looked around her room with some confusion.

  “Where are you going? Randy should be back tomorrow.” Lacey’s voice grew louder on the phone and it pulled Nora back to their conversation. How much did her mother know? She said she’d seen Randy, but hadn’t talked to him.

  “I’m going to spend a couple nights in Deadwood. Randy is going to his parents for a few days.” Nora shook her head and ran her finger tips across her forehead. She felt a headache coming on.

  “Deadwood? You’re dad sent Randy to North Platte for some bulls. He will be back tomorrow and maybe then you can work this out with him.” Her mother’s words ran together and Nora stood up in a huff.

  “Yes, Deadwood and Randy doesn’t have anything to say about it. I’m going up there to meet with Colt Cavanaugh and his band.” Nora really was confused now. There was something going on and she couldn’t put her finger on it. She was starting to feel like her mother was saying it was okay to be herself as long as she worked her marriage out.

  “Uh-oh.” Lacey’s voice dropped the intensity. “Oh Nora, you’re going to tell him, aren’t you?” It sounded like more of a statement than a question.

  “Who told you, Mom? Did Garrett or Matt call you last night?” Nora went immediately on the defensive.

  “No one had to tell me that Colt is Drew’s father. He’s the only boy you ran around with that summer. I just put two and two together.” Nora’s mom had figured it out.

  How long has she known? Nora grimaced and wondered if it really mattered. Time certainly wasn’t the issue here.

  “Yes, I plan on telling him. I told Randy last night.” Nora wasn’t sure how she was going to tell Colt he had a son. She hoped that he could handle knowing now. There was no changing the past, but she’d only kept it from him to spare him the responsibility when his dream was on the line.

  “You’re not just going to tell him that he’s the father, are you? You’re hoping that Colt will want to be a family.” The sadness in her mother’s voice was disconcerting. Of course Nora’s family would be upset that she was going to hurt Randy. They’d welcomed him with open arms. He had practically been part of the family since the day he came to work as foreman on the Crossing Pines.

  “I saw him last night at The Well and today at the post office. I really think there is still something there between us. I have to find out if I’m in love with Colt and if he’s in love with me. I owe that much to Drew and to myself.” Pacing around the room, Nora felt like a caged animal. Everything was closing around her and the space between was getting smaller and smaller.

  “I can’t tell you what to do anymore. You aren’t a little girl.” Lacey paused and Nora closed her eyes hoping that the words coming next would not scar them both. “Just be careful and cautious.”

  The last words of their conversation reverberated in her mind. It was easy to want to be selfish. It was harder to make decisions for herself and her son. Drew trumped them all and his needs would always come first. Of course she wanted him to know his real father, but he had never been lacking for male influence. He had a doting grandfather, two watchful uncles, and a step father who adored him. If Colt chose not to be a part of Drew’s life, it certainly wouldn’t damage the boy.

  Nora flew around pulling a few articles of clothing from her closet. She put her makeup in a small toiletry bag and packed her flat iron. Once it was all packed up and loaded into her car, she took one last look around the house.

  Maybe I should leave Randy a note. Then again what exactly would she tell him?

  Spending the night in Deadwood. Be home soon. Would she be home soon? Would he even care? Maybe he was ready to say good riddance and slam the door already. Maybe he wasn’t. Nora sighed and picked up her purse. Her cell phone vibrated in her front pocket of her blue jeans. She slipped it out and flicked her finger across the screen.

  @Colt: You’re all set. You’ve a room at the Deadwood Mountain Grand hotel. Hope to see you soon.

  It was happening and she had started it. Now it was time to see it through. She wished she could start this journey with a clear head, but something in her heart told her this was not going to end up as she planned. There had been nearly seven years since her summer romance with Colt Cavanaugh and no contact in between those years. Was it possible to discover a love she never dreamed existed in a week?

  Sliding her cell phone back into her purse and grabbing her keys from the peg by the door, Nora turned the lock. The door swung closed behind her and she checked the knob just to be sure it was secure. Walking to her driver’s side door, she pulled the latch and got inside. With a deep breath and a roar of her engine, Nora headed for Deadwood. A place she hoped she could gamble and win big.

  Chapter 9

  The orange sunset was drifting over the town of Deadwood, South Dakota when Nora came down the hill that funneled into the historic gaming district. The lights of the sidewalks were just coming on and the glitter of the individual casinos gave it a welcoming flare.

  Deadwood was a very special place filled to the brim with land disputes, gold mines, famous lawmen, and now organized gambling that brought many tourists to the small town. Wild Bill Hickok had been shot in the back at Saloon 10 while he was pl
aying cards. The Homestake Mine had been a lucrative and working gold mine up until 2004. The casino and restaurant combination of The Midnight Star held the memorabilia of Kevin Costner, who played in many western movies including Silverado and Dances with Wolves. Everywhere you turned there was more and more to learn. Nora was completely in awe and right at home here in Deadwood.

  She had never been to the Deadwood Mountain Grand Hotel and Casino as it had been built recently. Work had consumed more and more of her time. She wished she’d visited earlier as she saw the lights glinting off the grey metal building. It had a whole lot of swag as it sat up on the hill overlooking the historic downtown. Nora pulled into a parking spot and wished the car next to her had a better driver. It was parked over the line and would probably ding Nora’s door trying to get back inside. Maybe she’d get lucky and they’d be staying the night. She rolled her eyes and considered that too much to ask. She’d been testing the Fates a bit more than she usually did.

  Nora took a deep breath before she rallied the courage to open her door. As she put her hand on the lever, she heard the familiar chirp of her cell phone. She hoped it was Colt and not Randy texting her. A silent prayer later and Nora was reading what Colt had sent her.

  @Colt: I’ve been watching the clock and hoping that you haven’t changed your mind. You haven’t, right? You’re still coming?

  Now she wondered who was insecure and she also noted the hurried thumping of her heart. The giddiness was new and she more than liked the feeling of anticipation.

  @Nora: I’ve been wondering if this is such a good idea all the way here.

  Nora grinned at being so cheeky. It was fun to tease him a bit though. Her own insecurities felt more trivial all the time. Her phone dinged at her again and she looked into the glowing screen.

  @Colt: Ha! You are really here? Wait! I’m coming down!

  Nora shook her head and pulled the lever to get out of the car. Her head felt light and her throat was dry. She popped the trunk with her keyless entry. She took a deep breath of the chilly air and coughed once at the burn.

  “I can’t believe you made it! I thought for sure you would text me and tell me you’d changed your mind.” Colt’s exuberant voice burst on her ears before she even saw him. She lifted her trunk lid and attempted to lift out her bag. Colt’s fingers wrapped over her own and stopped her from doing anything further.

  “I’m here.” Nora felt breathless as she turned her eyes to find the dancing light in those silvery grey ones that haunted her memories. They were soft and consuming like falling into the hot liquid of a precious metal.

  “Yes you are.” Colt’s smile played on his lips without quirking the outer edges. They just stood there, staring at each other. In some silly alternative universe, Nora wondered what he thought of her.

  “I, uh, haven’t been to Deadwood in a couple of years.” Nora mentally rolled her eyes at the awkward attempt at conversation. She couldn’t believe she had almost mentioned that the last time she had been here was with Randy on their honeymoon.

  “It has been quite a bit longer for me. I do love this town. There is always something to do and a ton of people having fun. It’s my kind of place!” Colt grinned as he lifted his palms into the air. Nora smiled and blushed like a teenager. She was thankful that he couldn’t see her all that well in the parking lot, even with the security lights.

  “So you said you saved me a room here. Who do I need to see to check into my room?” Nora wished she could get over being tongue-tied. She was a grown woman and it was time to act like it. Colt nodded his head and took her overnight bag in hand.

  “Right this way, my lady.” He bowed his head and then looked up at her with a wink.

  “You’re still an amazing flirt!” Nora giggled and walked beside him to the front doors.

  For a Saturday night in Deadwood, the Grand was pretty quiet. She could hear the slot machines music and the ticking as the wheels of cherries, treasure chests, and various other creatures spun inside the slot machines. There were also felted card tables that offered Black Jack, Three Card Poker, and a host of other games where cash changed hands rather quickly. Nora figured she’d find a seat at the Black Jack table sooner or later. Of all the gambling that could be done in Deadwood, a hand of cards was always her favorite.

  “Don’t I need to check in at the hotel’s front desk?” Nora asked rather confused that they were headed to an elevator. The shiny doors opened to let out a young couple that couldn’t keep their hands to themselves. Nora lifted a brow and fought the weird sensation of being bothered by it. Public displays of affection had never been her thing. As she recalled from their few months together, Colt was all for it.

  “I told you that I had it all taken care of. Just enjoy it!” Colt twitched his grin when he saw her mouth fall open.

  “You paid for my room for two nights? Colt, I don’t want you to think I expected you to do that.” Nora felt out of place. Being here in Deadwood with him was one thing. Letting him pay for her room was quite another. “In fact, let’s go downstairs and I’ll book the room under my name and pay the bill.” Nora turned towards the lobby again when she felt Colt grip her wrist. She stopped. His touch shivered through her.

  “Please let me do this for you. I was excited for you to come.” Colt’s earnestness struck a chord of longing. It made her yearn for the summer they spent together laughing and sharing all of their secrets.

  “I didn’t want you to feel like you had to do it.” Nora said in the quiet of the elevator as the doors slid closed. Colt’s fingers remained around her wrist as more of a caress than restraint.

  “Believe me, Nora, I do very little that I have to anymore.” He flashed that grin again and Nora smiled too. This guy standing in the elevator with her hadn’t changed quite as much as it had seemed at first. He was still as mischievous and fun-loving as he ever was. He was simply older with more at his disposal.

  The floors ticked by on the elevator screen and she wasn’t sure if it was the motion of the floor or the fact that Colt was standing so close to her. Heck, he was still touching her arm. It almost seemed surreal that the world would shift just enough to allow her time to see him again. Looking down at her feet, Nora couldn’t discount the guilt that lay low in her stomach. She was still married and even though that wasn’t entirely figured out, there were only so many lines she could cross without destroying her own morals.

  As loose as they are. The ever constant voice snapped back at her. Sadly she couldn’t dispute their logic tonight. Sometimes there was too much at stake to not know what you want. Life was very short and it would be terrible to not be happy. Nora’s internal riot was quieted when the elevator door dinged and a moment later, the doors slid open to reveal a long hallway. Colt stepped out first stood between the doors to allow her time to file out. They walked side by side down the hall and Colt pulled out a small paper sleeve with the hotel keys inside.

  “You’re in the GunSlinger Room. I hope you enjoy it.” Colt smiled as they halted in front of the room and he slipped the key in to unlock it.

  “My room has a title?” Nora asked with some awe. As soon as the door was pushed aside, she could see the crispness of soft tans and deep, rich browns. The large California King bed caught her eye and she wondered if it was as comfortable as it looked. She’d bet anything that it was!

  “So what do you think? Will it work?” Colt asked from the door. He hadn’t progressed into the room and her overnight bag sat on the luggage pod just behind the door. Nora smiled at him and nodded her head.

  “Well there is one thing that it doesn’t have.” She chuckled when Colt’s business face came to the surface.

  “What is it? We will get it.” Colt’s determination to make this everything she wished it could be was touching. She almost felt bad for teasing him.

  “There’s no GunSlinger in here.” She wrinkled her nose at him. “You’d think with a title like that there would be a rowdy cowboy included.” Nora couldn’t contain
the laughter any longer as the meaning finally hit Colt upside the head. He leaned his head back and laughed loudly.

  “Oh gosh! I forgot about your quick wit.” He wiped the corner of his eyes and shook his head slightly at her. “I’ve missed it.” Her heart tripped over his words.

  Someone actually missed me. It hadn’t been said before now. In truth, it was a totally mind blowing experience. Nora took a couple of steps forward and then sat on the edge of the bed.

  “Believe it or not, I’ve missed you too.” She took a deep breath and decided to look in Colt’s direction. He hadn’t said a word. His head was cocked to the side and he watched her as a young boy might watch something new with interest.

  “I better get cleaned up. Can I swing by in an hour and take you to dinner?” Colt asked as he shuffled his feet and looked questioningly in her direction. Nora smiled gently and nodded.

  “Dinner sounds great.” She watched him hold her gaze and then with a final nod, he pulled the door closed behind him. Alone in her hotel room, Nora couldn’t peg one definite emotion in the boiling mess. She only hoped that she would know the truth by the end of this journey. She was already on the roller coaster, so she figured she might as well enjoy the ride.

  ***

  Nora waited for the phone to ring as she sat on the edge of the large California King. The room was beautiful and the soft browns refreshing as she looked out the private balcony to the twinkling lights of Deadwood. The night was just a bit too chilly to leave the patio doors open, but just seeing it through the windows made it surreal.

  She couldn’t believe she was in Deadwood in the same hotel as Colt Cavanaugh. The very Colt Cavanaugh who had been a brilliant summer flame and who had also left her with the most amazing gift. He had left her with their child and she was sure he’d taken her heart with him. Nora sighed, leaning back against the fluffy pillows.