She gave a mirthless laugh. When she finally met a man to whom she was inexplicably drawn, he wasn’t someone with whom she could have a permanent relationship. Rather like the complaint she had often heard before, all the good ones are married. He wasn’t exactly married, he wasn’t even betrothed. But he would be someday and to someone of his father’s choosing. Definitely not me. Still, perhaps she could enjoy a casual friendship. She had before, and while not particularly fulfilling it had been pleasant.
Ah well, she’d cross that bridge when she came to it. Now she realized she needed to speak with Lady Wynda. Other than Gertrude, she was the only person who knew the truth about the pocket watch and Elizabeth needed to tell her what had happened.
She went straight to Wynda’s chamber and knocked.
Lilliana opened the door to her. A huge smile spread across her face. “Elsie, do come in, lass.”
Wynda called from the bed. “Oh Elsie, I heard the wonderful news about Jessie and John’s new bairn. I am so happy for them. I wish I could go see them.”
Her excitement was palpable. Elsie suspected that on hearing the news of the birth, Wynda allowed herself to envision her own healthy child. Elsie had never been much for prayer but she said a silent one in that moment. Dear, God, please let this baby live.
“I’ve been to check on them today and both Jessie and the babe are well. As soon as Jessie has recovered a bit, I’m sure she’d be happy to bring him for a visit.”
“Oh, I’d love that.” Wynda practically glowed. “I normally go visit new mothers.”
“Wynda, if Elsie can stay with ye for a while, I’ll extend yer congratulations and invite Jessie to visit as soon as she is able,” said Lilliana.
“That’s an excellent idea.”
“Aye, my lady. If ye wish, I’ll stay with Lady Wynda for the rest of the afternoon.”
“Perfect. Will I send Alice up when it’s time for the evening meal?”
“I’d be happy to stay here and dine with ye Lady Wynda,” said Elizabeth.
Wynda smiled. “That would be lovely. Thank ye, Elsie.”
“Well then, I’ll see to that and send Alice up afterwards.”
“Thank ye, Lilliana. I don’t know what I’d do without ye.”
Lilliana took Wynda’s hand for a moment, giving it a squeeze. “’Tis my pleasure.”
After Lilliana had left, Wynda motioned towards a chair near the bed. “Come sit. Ye look like something’s on yer mind.”
“Aye, my lady, there is something on my mind, and ye’re the only one I can speak to about it.”
A sad expression crossed Wynda’s face. “Did ye remember the word? Are ye leaving us, Elizabeth?”
“Well, I did remember the word, but I’m not leaving.”
“Will ye stay the full sixty days then?”
“My lady, I’ve decided to stay for good. It seems that Elsie wants to stay in my time too.”
“If ye know that, ye must have seen Gertrude today.”
“Aye, I did. She reminded me of why I accepted the pocket watch in the first place. It was because I wanted to experience what it was like to care for patients more completely. To feel that I make an impact on their lives. I can do that in this time and place.”
Wynda looked at her seriously. “Aye ye can. But do ye not think ye could find a way to accomplish that in yer own time?”
Elizabeth nodded. “I suppose I probably could. But there is more to it than that. Gertrude asked me to consider whether this is my destiny. I think it is. I feel…complete here.”
Wynda sighed with relief, tears filling her eyes. “I prayed…I’m sorry Elizabeth, I prayed ye wouldn’t remember the word but this is more than I had hoped for. Ye’ve chosen to stay here with us.”
“Aye, my lady, that’s precisely it. But I want to remain at Carraigile. I know I’m supposed to go back to Macrae, but I hope I don’t have to. I hope there is a way I can stay here.”
“Don’t worry about a thing. We will make it happen. I promise, ye.”
Elizabeth wasn’t entirely sure that was within Wynda’s power, but it raised her spirits nonetheless.
Chapter 18
As the days passed, Elizabeth was surprised at how very happy she felt. She loved working with Morag. The old midwife hadn’t been threatened by Elizabeth and her unusual ideas. She had been open to learning and trying new things. To her surprise, Elizabeth realized almost immediately there was quite a bit she could learn from Morag. The old midwife had an air that conveyed both calm confidence and grandmotherly affection. Elizabeth had always been direct and efficient. Perhaps, blunt, but she told herself didn’t have the luxury of time in her modern practice.
When Morag visited someone who needed her she took her time. She chatted casually, offered advice as needed but often she just listened. Elizabeth would have considered this to be time wasted until she had experienced it herself. The truth was, Morag learned things by simply allowing people to talk. She managed to subtly direct conversation in a way that resulted in her learning all she needed without simply firing off personal questions.
Elizabeth’s admiration for Morag grew daily, quickly moving beyond a professional respect, even beyond friendship. She felt closer to Morag than she ever had to her mother or grandmothers. She suffered a little guilt knowing it had been years since she had spent any significant time with her family, but their lives had been as busy as hers. Family never seemed to be a priority to any of them.
On the other hand, Elizabeth visited Morag every day. Some days Morag had a patient to go see, other days, they just chatted over an herbal tisane. And so it was, the day after Elizabeth had decided to stay in the thirteenth century, she was drawn into a conversation that forced her to think long and hard about what it meant to be a medieval woman.
“Elsie, dear, ye are so much a part of life here it’s hard to remember ye’ve only been with us a little over a month.”
“Aye, it feels like home.”
“I’m glad. Honestly, lass, I don’t want ye to leave.”
“That makes two of us. I don’t want to leave.”
Morag leveled a far too perceptive stare at her. “I would like nothing better than for ye to stay here. I’m getting older and it would do my heart good to know I was leaving my clanswomen in good hands. Moreover, I know it’s what Lady Wynda wants, but how can ye stay? Laird Macrae is not likely to allow it is he?”
“I…well…I might be able to convince him.”
“If ye belonged to Laird MacKenzie there’s not a single chance under heaven that he’d just let ye up and leave. It was beyond generous when Laird Macrae let ye come here—being his best midwife and all. I cannot believe he will permit ye to stay.”
“But maybe if I—”
“Nay, lass. If ye were Macrae’s best midwife, ye would know I’m right. Ye’re keeping something from me. Ye are little more than a child yerself and ye know more about delivering bairns and other healing skills than anyone I have ever met.”
“But, Morag, I—”
“Elsie, I love ye, lass, but I know something isn’t right. I’m afraid for ye. When the truth comes out—and I swear to ye, it always does—I fear for yer safety. My sweet lass, I might be able to help if I know the real story. Please, Elsie.”
Words like sorcery and witchcraft were spinning in Elsie’s mind. If Morag called her out—but nay, Elsie looked into the old woman’s eyes and knew she’d never do that.
“Ye’re right, Morag. I’m not who ye think I am. I’m not even who Laird Macrae thinks I am.”
Elizabeth proceeded to tell her the whole story. When she had finished, Morag looked at her, not with fear but with something akin to awe. “So ye aren’t a lass of one and twenty.”
“Well, Elsie is, but nay, in my century I am older.”
Morag canted her head, narrowing her eyes. “How much older?”
Elizabeth blushed. “Frankly, not all that much older. I am eight and twenty. I did start studying medicine younger than
most people and I’m often judged by my age there as well.”
“Ye’re story is hard to believe, but I understand now how ye know so many extraordinary things—and how there are ordinary things ye don’t seem to know. Still, it seems ye’re destined to leave anyway.”
“Nay, Morag, I’m not. I finally remembered the word, the morning after Jessie delivered Caleb. But I don’t want to leave.”
“Ye’d choose to stay? What about Elsie?”
“Gertrude says she too wants to stay in my time.”
“Gertrude?”
“Aye, Gertrude is the name of the woman who gave me the pocket watch.”
“I’ve known Gertrude for years. She passes through this way occasionally. There are folks who think she’s odd, but I’ve always noticed good things seem to follow in her wake.” She took Elizabeth’s hands in hers. “I’d say this time is no different. Does anyone else know?”
“Lady Wynda knows. Gertrude told her I was coming—before I knew it myself.”
Morag chuckled. “That sounds like Gertrude and since she’s behind this, I expect she has some plan.”
“Perhaps, although I do find it hard not to worry about it. At least Laird Macrae doesn’t actually believe I’m a midwife much less his clan’s best.”
“Hopefully that will be his loss. I’m glad ye told me.”
“Please, don’t tell anyone else. I fear that others may be less willing to believe the bizarre circumstances that brought me here.”
“Aye, yer secret’s safe with me lass.” She grinned at Elizabeth. “Now that I know the truth, I suppose it explains yer boldness.”
“I have tried to mind my tongue, but ye’re right, things are very different in my time.”
“They must be if lassies can be educated and become physicians just like men can.”
“Aye, that’s part of it, but honestly, where I live, there is no nobility. The idea that I would have to behave a certain way simply because I am a woman or wasn’t born into a noble family is difficult for me to accept.”
“Ah, about that. Lass, if ye’re to stay here, there is something I want to discuss with ye. When I thought ye knew our ways and ye’d be leaving us, I didn’t worry over much, but this changes things.”
Elizabeth frowned. “What have I done now?”
Morag chuckled. “Nothing. Yet. But ye’ve clearly learned there’s a sharp distinction between commoners and nobility.”
“Aye.”
“And Sir Cade is a nobleman.”
Elizabeth sighed. She feared she knew where this was going. “I know that.”
“Lass, there are whispers in the clan about how fond he is of ye.”
“Is it that obvious?”
“Good heavens, he can’t keep his hands of ye.”
Elizabeth gave her a wry smile. “It is only with great effort that I keep my hands off him.”
Morag chuckled. “Aye, there’s no denying he’s an attractive man. But, lass, he is destined to marry a noblewoman, creating a new alliance or strengthening an old one with another clan. Most noblemen are, although sometimes younger sons or nephews may have a bit more of a say in things.”
“I do know that, but Morag, I’m not looking for a husband.”
“Why? Are ye married to someone in yer own time?”
“Nay.”
“Then it’s something we must talk about. Now that ye’re staying, ye need to think about getting married.”
“Why?”
“Because, like it or not, men rule here. Everyone and everything is under the control of one man or another.”
“I’m not and I won’t be as long as I don’t’marry.”
“Oh but, lass, ye are. Ye belong to Laird Macrae and he’s loaned ye to Laird MacKenzie, so ye answer to him as long as ye’re here.”
“Ye’re not serious. I belong to Laird Macrae? Am I some kind of slave?”
“Nay lass, ye aren’t a slave, but ye belong to the Macrae nevertheless. Perhaps yer best way of staying here is to marry—then ye’ll belong to yer husband, who would be a MacKenzie and thus bound by fealty to Laird MacKenzie.”
“Morag, I’m not ready to be married. I’m too young.”
Morag snorted. “Ye most certainly are not too young and whether ye want to or not, ye must marry to secure yer future. Ye need to accept that and plan for it. Ye’ll need to choose carefully. The man who marries ye will need a tolerant nature and no small amount of patience.”
Elizabeth frowned. “I’m not that bad.”
“Ye aren’t bad at all. But ye’re different. Everyone knows it and ye’ll want a husband who isn’t threatened by that—who doesn’t try to force ye to be someone ye’re not.”
Elizabeth sighed. She definitely hadn’t considered this.
Morag laughed. “Don’t look as if the world is ending lass. There are plenty of fine, sensible, MacKenzie men who’ll fall over themselves for ye.”
It was Elizabeth’s turn to laugh. “I heartily doubt that.”
“Don’t. I’m certain of it. But I am also as certain that the best of the men available will not want a wife who has lain with other men.”
Elizabeth was taken aback. “Morag, I haven’t…I mean Elsie hasn’t and I haven’t since I’ve been in her body.”
Morag arched an eyebrow at her.
Elizabeth shrugged. “Things are a bit different in the twenty-first century, but the fact remains, I haven’t…well, you know…with Sir Cade.”
“I think everyone knows ye haven’t…well, you know, with Sir Cade.” Morag winked at her. “But that isn’t because he hasn’t tried to woo ye into his bed. And ye certainly wouldn’t be the first. Many a lass has…well, you know, with the young laird.” It was clear that the old midwife found Elizabeth’s difficulty chatting about this topic amusing. “It isn’t as frowned upon as ye might think for a common lass. Nevertheless, many common men still prefer a pure bride or at least one who hasn’t engaged in a widely known dalliance with the man who will be laird of the clan someday.”
“So ye’re saying to stay away from Sir Cade?”
“I’m saying, if ye plan to stay here at Carraigile, ye may want guard yer reputation well.”
“What if I don’t wish to be married?”
“Elizabeth, I assure ye that is not a choice ye want to make. Unmarried women are vulnerable and subject to gossip regardless of how careful they are. Nay, lass, if ye’re staying in this time, not just in this clan, ye need to marry.”
Chapter 19
Over the next few days, Elizabeth thought long and hard about the things Morag had told her. Although she didn’t like to admit it, as Morag had pointed out, there were a number of very practical reasons why she should marry. It wasn’t that she was opposed to marriage, it just hadn’t been her primary focus. Just as she had told David, other goals were more important.
But now that she thought about it, although she loathed to admit it even to herself, marriage to a man with excellent prospects from a good family was yet another one of her parents’ expectations of her. It was the reason she started dating David in the first place. His father was the owner and chief executive officer of a huge, multinational conglomerate that had subsidiaries in a wide variety of industries. And not coincidentally, he was one of her mother’s most powerful clients.
She could only laugh at the irony of it. She had told Morag that there was no “nobility” where she lived but she realized now that was just semantics. She wasn’t Lady Elizabeth Quinn, but she was from a powerful, wealthy family. And although her parents couldn’t force her to marry a man of their choosing, they still “made introductions” and expected her to “marry well.” It was probably the reason she had never introduced them to her first boyfriend.
Ironically, Cade was just the kind of man her parents would expect her to marry, but in this time, she wasn’t a suitable wife for him. Even though she knew this, she had still harbored a small hope that, perhaps, he would spurn convention, declare is love for her and ask fo
r her hand.
She had to face facts. As much as she liked Cade and enjoyed his company, as much as she could love him if she allowed herself to, there was no future for them. Morag was correct, Elizabeth needed to find a husband, and that would never happen as long as she allowed the flirtation between herself and Cade to continue. She had to put her Cinderella dreams aside. So the next day, when Cade wanted to take her riding, she steeled herself and said no.
“Ye’re refusing to ride with me?”
“I appreciate everything ye’ve taught me, but I ride well enough now and shouldn’t take any more of yer time.”
“My time is my own and not for ye to decide how I spend it. If I wish to ride with ye, it’s my choice to make.”
And there’s the medieval nobleman rearing his head. She sighed. “Nevertheless, I don’t want to.”
He frowned. “Elsie, it’s Sunday afternoon. Ye have nothing else pressing. I want ye to go riding with me. Ye’ve always enjoyed it.” He held a hand out to her. “Come.”
She tried again. “I don’t wish to go today, Sir Cade.”
His frown deepened to a scowl. “I’ve asked ye to accompany me on a ride. I don’t care if ye wish to or not.” He took her by the elbow and practically pulled her out of the great hall and across the bailey, towards the stable.
The Midwife: The Pocket Watch Chronicles Page 16
